December 2017 Moms

pregnant after IF Check-in Week May29th

Sorry this was a day late ladies, my excuse this week is the long weekend!

1) How far along are you? 


2) How are you feeling physically and emotionally? 

3) When is your next appointment? 

4) Rants/Raves/Questions 

5) GTKY: what job would you be terrible at? if money was no object what job would you love to do (even if you would be terrible at it?!?)
*TW*
TTC 1/2012
Diagnosed : unexplained infertility
6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015
TTC #3 5/2016
Restarted Fertility tx
IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17

Re: pregnant after IF Check-in Week May29th

  • 1) How far along are you? 11+6

    2) How are you feeling physically and emotionally? Finally starting to feel a little better. The fatigue is still there, but I definitely feel better. Now if I can only stop the dizzispells. 

    3) When is your next appointment? June 6th and 8th

    4) Rants/Raves/Questions I definitely used this pregnancy to get out of seeing my ILs this weekend. Weirdly enough, I would not have minded seeing my MIL, but the idea seeing my SIL and BIL right now makes me want to vomit. MIL had stage three lung cancer and chemo is kicking her butt. She lives in my BIL's backyard in a one bedroom apartment she paid to build that will one day function as their pool house, which is almost two hours away from H and I. They did nothing to help care for her until we yelled at them.In fact, they continued to ask her to babysit their three kids, and then yelled at her because she had been exhausted and cranky lately, and she was "taking it out on the kids." Which, I get, it wasn't OK of MIL to be cranky to the kids, but instead of yelling at her, maybe they should have taken care of their own dang kids... Ugh, sorry. I think Ive ranted about this before, but they make me insane because they act like they do so much and tell us how they're exhausted from "taking care of her" but when we talk to her, she hasn't seem them in over a week. Just ugh. 

    5) GTKY: what job would you be terrible at? if money was no object what job would you love to do (even if you would be terrible at it?!?) I feel like this is two separate questions. I would be terrible at being a fashion blogger but I have no desire to do that. However, if money were no object, I'd teach swim lessons and coach swim team. I did that through high school and college and absolutely loved it, but I like to believe that I wouldn't be terrible at it. 
    Me: 30 DH: 31
    2 Dogs / 2 Cats 
    IUI #1 07/2016 BFN
    IUI #2 10/2016 BFN
    IUI #3 11/2016 BFN
    IVF #1 03/2017 - 23 Retrieved / 22 Fertilized / 11 at Day 3 / 1 Beautiful Embryo tf on Day 5 / 7 Frozen on Day 6 - Beta #1 4/5/17: 104 Beta #2 4/7/17 224
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    BabyFruit Ticker


  • 1) How far along are you? 
    11+4
    2) How are you feeling physically and emotionally? 
    I haven't thrown up in 48 hours!! Knocking on lots of wood right now but exhaustion has completely taken over, as has anxiety about all that can go wrong - namely, waiting on my Maternit21 results.  

    3) When is your next appointment? 
    I have my NT scan on Friday! Can't wait to see my little wiggleworm again 

    4) Rants/Raves/Questions 

    5) GTKY: what job would you be terrible at? if money was no object what job would you love to do (even if you would be terrible at it?!?)

    i would be a terrible accountant Bc I hate numbers lol if money was no object, I would love to be a HS history teacher. 
    DH: 34 | Me: 35
    DS1 9/24/13
    DX Diminished Ovarian Reserve, Factor V Leiden Mutation, Secondary Infertility
    MFI (SA #1
    Count 11mill, Motility: 18%, Morphology: 1%)
    MFI (SA #2Count 7 mill, Motility: 18%, Morphology: 1%)
    AMH .328 
    | FSH 13.2 
    Oct. 2016: Clomid + TI
    IVF: ER 3/1/17; 5 retrieved, 3 mature & fertilized
    Results: 2 PGS normal embryos
    Planned on August 2017 transfer
    **TW**
    Natural BFP 4/3/17,Expecting baby boy via RCS 12/7/17

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  • 1) How far along are you? 10+1

    2) How are you feeling physically and emotionally? hanging in there... the nausea/dry heaves/food aversions and fatigue are kicking my butt... morning and evenings are rough but Its not so bad during the day. just a few more weeks and things should be better. On the upside of all these symptoms is it makes me feel like pistachio is still growing strong.

    3) When is your next appointment? next week, the 9th I think

    4) Rants/Raves/Questions DH has been such a champ with all of these symptoms. 

    5) GTKY: what job would you be terrible at? if money was no object what job would you love to do (even if you would be terrible at it?!?) something with design or dancing I am so not creative and have 2 left feet. I would love to be a lactation consultant or one of those volunteers that snuggles NICU babies... 

    @txmomma16 your SIL/BIL sound terrible, I would not have been able to stomach them either!
    @Marley629 Hooray for 48hrs with no vomiting!!! sorry the fatigue is hitting you but these are all signs of a good pregnancy! fx for your test results. 
    *TW*
    TTC 1/2012
    Diagnosed : unexplained infertility
    6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015
    TTC #3 5/2016
    Restarted Fertility tx
    IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17

  • vhill74vhill74 member
    1) How far along are you? 
    9 weeks 2 days
    2) How are you feeling physically and emotionally? 
    Much better since I got to see the baby today. Other than that I'm a little sleepy.
    3) When is your next appointment? 
    This next Monday. I'm having that next-gen test done, a little nervous but excited to know if we're right about this baby being a girl.
    4) Rants/Raves/Questions 
    Fruit fruit, I love fruit!! 
    5) GTKY: what job would you be terrible at? if money was no object what job would you love to do (even if you would be terrible at it?!?)
    I'd be horrible at any job that would depend on me talking to strangers. When the phone rings at my current job it takes two or three rings for me to answer because phones are the worst!!!
    If money were no object I'd be a writer or I'd open a no kill animal sanctuary. 
  • baevnbaevn member
    1) How far along are you? 
    10 + 6
    2) How are you feeling physically and emotionally? 
    Good just exhausted but puking has vastly improved just get like one bout of nausea everyday 
    3) When is your next appointment? 
    In 3.5 weeks though I need to do gestational diabetes test sometime this week 
    4) Rants/Raves/Questions 
    Our hospital has this whole BMI thing and if your BMI is over 30 then you have to have additional testing and they talk about your weight a lot and every test has patient's weight on it as a note. Mine is at 35 If your BMI approaches 45 you can't deliver here and everyone who has a bmi over 30 has to see anestisiologist (sp?) At 37 weeks no matter what. They recommended I see a dietician and I said no I actually eat healthy it is just tough for me to lose weight as much as I am trying to let it go and not be all sensitive about it because really I know I am overweight it is mentally affecting me. I get anxious about eating and feel guilty if I even think about carbs or sugar. I am panicky over gaining weight. I am trying to be active everyday. I have lost like 5 lbs so far this pregnancy from sick and even a few more since I quit puking which surprised me. Ugh long rant. 
    5) GTKY: what job would you be terrible at? if money was no object what job would you love to do (even if you would be terrible at it?!?)
    I dunno. I feel like I am a good learner so I can at least learn most things. Anything involving heights as i am kind of terrified. No firefigting or like windmill technician/ window washer. 

    I would love to be like a book editor or just general book reader/reviewer. 
  • baevnbaevn member
    @txmomma16 your SIL/BIL do sound awful. I hate it when people can't see past themselves. I wouldn't have much patience for kids too if I was fighting cancer! 

    @Marley629 isn't it such a relief to get a break. Hope it lasts for you! 

    @wabash15 the symptoms are such a bittersweet thing but it does feel nice to have a physical reminder of the baby. Can't wait for movement! 
  • @baevn I'm sorry your hospital system is making you feel bad about your weight. I think all you can do is try your best in terms of eating healthy but everyone deserves a splurge. Plus I am a firm believer that your just getting through the first trimester and eating what has the potential to stay down or not make you want to vomit just looking/thinking about it. hang in there. 
    *TW*
    TTC 1/2012
    Diagnosed : unexplained infertility
    6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015
    TTC #3 5/2016
    Restarted Fertility tx
    IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17

  • @txmomma16 Your in-laws sound like wonderful people (that's a little sarcasm). 

    @baevn I don't like your clinic. Try not to worry too much. I think stress would have more of an effect than your BMI. I'm sure my BMI is somewhere around that 30 threshold and my doc hasn't sad anything. Also, since my nausea has been awful, he told me to eat whatever will stay down. 

    1) How far along are you? 
    11+3 with di twins 

    2) How are you feeling physically and emotionally? 
    I'm OK. The nausea has been better the past two days so I can't complain. 

    3) When is your next appointment? 
    Friday to hear the heartbeats. 

    4) Rants/Raves/Questions 
    I'm just ready for the second trimester 

    5) GTKY: what job would you be terrible at? if money was no object what job would you love to do (even if you would be terrible at it?!?)
    I'd be terrible at anything artsy. I'm so not creative. If money was no object, I'd probably do something with young children to get them excited about learning and motivate them. I used to volunteer as a tutor and I loved it. However, I'd love something a little more involved than that. 
  • vhill74vhill74 member
    @baevn I'm so sorry your hospital has that requirement! Just know that you are beautiful and there is nothing wrong with you! It's just a crappy small sighted policy! There is not one type of woman/person, we're all different and wonderful! Don't let them give you a complex, especially now!! It's such a beautiful time in your life and you need to feel free to enjoy it! Lots of love to you from a fellow voluptuous mama! 
  • @baevn  your hospital system is really stressing me out. as someone who works in healthcare i think its one thing to tell your patients but there are ways to say it and it kind of seems like at this point its just shaming and really upsetting. honestly the IOM does not recommend weight loss in pregnancy and im going to need them to take it down a notch or TEN

    WTF PAUL!!?!?

  • thanks @wabash15 for starting this. I havent been participating in the last few weeks bc I kind of had this weird supersitition that i should only participate in the PGAL one until im 2nd trimester. but that went away today weirdly..

    1) How far along are you? 9w4d 

    2) How are you feeling physically and emotionally? Still really anxious and keep worrying that something is wrong. I think this PGAL brain is the worst. I still can not believe i finally got pregnant with IVF, this is still really surreal to me.

    3) When is your next appointment? June 19, 21

    4) Rants/Raves/Questions I really want some delicious pastries. I have celiac disease so its a huge nono but im sooo000ooo0000 craving a krispy kreme donut. just one. hot one. or a criossant. or  really any pastry. i also LOVE bagels. i got myself some good gluten free bagels that i plan to CRUSH

    5) GTKY: what job would you be terrible at? if money was no object what job would you love to do (even if you would be terrible at it?!?)
    i would be horrible at anything that requires you to do math in your head. when i have to figure out peoples ages from their birth year it literally is the saddest thing LOL or calculate their gestational age from their due date is even worse. i wish i could use an abacus. if theres one thing this baby will learn by age 8 it will be to use an abacus so help me bob!

    I would love to be a professional activist. i kind of wish i could still do that now. there are so many sad things in the world that really need to change but it seems like it would be a full time job to do that.


  • @jackiesmom324 PGAL brain is the worst. I'm glad you decided to join us!  darn you for listing off all of those amazing sounding pastries... they sound so good...  I hope you enjoy your bagels!
    *TW*
    TTC 1/2012
    Diagnosed : unexplained infertility
    6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015
    TTC #3 5/2016
    Restarted Fertility tx
    IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17

  • @baevn im sorry you're going throughout all of that. My nurse brain can rationalize all of it, but my empathic brain is very angry with the delivery of the messages here. This is actually an area I struggle with as a nurse because we know being over a certain BMI raises the risk of all sorts of issues with babe, but we also know that being below a certain BMI is even worse for babe. Either way, how should the system and practitioners handle these scenarios and work with patients instead of barking information/judgement at them? I actually work with pregnant women and new moms and my mantra is always: don't worry about what you eat until you're 14 weeks, if you're able to eat much at all, so don't let them stress you out, you are doing your best and that is more than good enough :)

    1) How far along are you? 
    12 + 5

    2) How are you feeling physically and emotionally? 
    Still feel like I'm cheating somehow. Starting to get headaches and had a total meltdown at my SO this weekend, but otherwise feeling pretty good for first tri!

    3) When is your next appointment? 
    June 29

    4) Rants/Raves/Questions 
    had our NT scan today and the OB said baby looks "absolutely perfect!" Now to wait 14 business days for the bloodwork to come back. This part is my rant, why on earth does it take THAT long? I'm mostly just irritated cause I don't want to wait 3 weeks to find out if this is a boy or girl haha, but sheesh! 

    5) GTKY: what job would you be terrible at? if money was no object what job would you love to do (even if you would be terrible at it?!?)
    oh geeze, i would be the worst chemist. Chemistry is SOOOO not my jam! My brain just does not compute it. If money was no object I would finally sit down and write/design the set of children's books/encyclopedias on the body and common diseases that I've dreamed about publishing. I am a nurse and graphic designer, merging those jobs has always been a dream of mine. 
    Me: 39 SO: 36

    Dx: low progesterone, possible DOR - officially "unexplained"

    TTC#1 since November 2015
    9/16/2016 IUI#1 - BFN
    10/12/2016 IUI#2 - BFN
    1/21/2017 Clomid/IUI#3 - BFN
    March 2017 IVF: BFP! (beta#1 191, beta#2 378!) - it's a boy! DS born 12/6/2017

    TTC #2 since July 2018
    May 2019 IVF #2: BFP! (beta#1 346, beta#2 646) - vanishing twin at 8 weeks. Baby B still going strong - due 2/8/20!
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @PoeMasque there's a health professional admin guy somewhere that's looking for you right now! He's looking for the whole package nurse and graphics but no seriously as much as they advertise for hospitals and promote health literacy you would probably be an exec VP of some health care firm 
  • @jackiesmom324 awww thanks!! If only I didn't need a MPH or MBA to be a VP.....or, let's be realistic, a penis and a huge ego. 
    Me: 39 SO: 36

    Dx: low progesterone, possible DOR - officially "unexplained"

    TTC#1 since November 2015
    9/16/2016 IUI#1 - BFN
    10/12/2016 IUI#2 - BFN
    1/21/2017 Clomid/IUI#3 - BFN
    March 2017 IVF: BFP! (beta#1 191, beta#2 378!) - it's a boy! DS born 12/6/2017

    TTC #2 since July 2018
    May 2019 IVF #2: BFP! (beta#1 346, beta#2 646) - vanishing twin at 8 weeks. Baby B still going strong - due 2/8/20!
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @PoeMasque you are so right and sick burn!  B)
  • @PoeMasque I second everything you said about the first trimester and for many its more a game of survival than doing everything perfectly. I'm glad your feeling good and that the baby looked good!
    *TW*
    TTC 1/2012
    Diagnosed : unexplained infertility
    6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015
    TTC #3 5/2016
    Restarted Fertility tx
    IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17

  • baevnbaevn member
    @jackiesmom324 I know! I am not super sensitive and like I said I am realistic I know I am overweight but this is also a new policy and I was near the same weight with my first and it was never once brought up. They explained it was about anesthetic but I had my gallbladder removed a year ago, same weight and nothing was said then either. I appreciated the nurse was trying to soften and was like this is my job, I am not trying to fat shame (which i felt as sentence made it seem like that is what it was) she was like soo many people fit into this. I didn't feel upset or offended at the time but I just feel very stressed about eating now. 

    @PoeMasque I logically understand why they are doing it and why they want to do extra testing but they have made such a big deal about it. I would prefer just like we are going to send you for additional testing because your bmi is elevated than like you should see a dietician and making a really big deal about it. Giving a pamphlet about why high bmi is bad in pregnancy. Well I am already pregnant so what do I do now. She was like just avoid any sugar and minimize your carbs and only eat healthy carbs. 

    I do eat quite healthy salad at least one meal/day all whole grains and generally lean meats. Tons of fruit. I am active but it is incredibly hard for me to lose weight and I will admit I am an emotional eater. I get why it is a thing but it is just this kind of unecessary stress. I also get frustrated because BMI isn't exactly the best indicator of health and even actual body fat and my last baby was nearly 10lbs and I retained a ton of water at the end. Will they refuse me for delivery if I gain water weight again? Honestly like 15lbs of water weight last time they had to give me water pills after to help shed it. 
  • Hey, y'all!
    I've been mainly hanging out in the Jan BMC, because my EDD is Jan 2, but I know that's going to change because it's TWINS!!  So I think I might be a little "bi-monthly" and hang out in both groups, if that's all right?  Because I fully expect to see these babies before 2018.

    1) How far along are you? 
    9 weeks, 2 days

    2) How are you feeling physically and emotionally? 
    Emotionally, I'm over the moon! I just saw my babies on ultrasound this morning, and I saw a membrane between them!  They share a gestational sac, so I was so, so worried about monoamniotic twins, but the membrane was easy to see.  And I got to hear their heartbeats for the first time!  
    Physically, it's all about the nausea.  Blerg.

    3) When is your next appointment? 
    I just got released from my RE today.  I'm going to a new Ob/gyn practice, so I expect them to call and set up an appointment once they have all my records.

    4) Rants/Raves/Questions 
    I'm so frustrated by the BMI shaming @baevn experienced!  I'm already overthinking everything I eat (Is there enough nutrition?  Any pesticides? Can my nausea handle this?), I can't imagine trying to restrict calories at the same time.  I'm also obese, right around 32, but I have babies inside me that need to eat. 

    If medical professionals want to help me learn how to reduce the risks of GD and high blood pressure, I will listen with all ears open, and will do what I can to take care of myself.  But I've also been studying a book by experts on multiples pregnancies, and I have a sense that I'll be drinking protein shakes before all is said and done, to hit my weight gain goals.

    5) GTKY: what job would you be terrible at? if money was no object what job would you love to do (even if you would be terrible at it?!?)
    From experience, I can say I am the worst telemarketer on the planet.  Fired after one day.  I don't mind.

    I would love to sing professionally.  It's not in the cards for me, though!
    Me- 39 (turning 40 in April), TTC for the first time ever (since Jan 2015), low ovarian reserve
    Married 3/14/14 to my wonderful wife, but her sperm count is rather low
    TTC with frozen donor sperm and science

    7 IUIs, 7 BFNs.
    2 IVF attempts, both cancelled and converted to IUI, both BFNs.
    Decided that my tired old ovaries are ready to retire.
    Next step- reciprocal IVF, using my wife's eggs, my uterus!  
    fresh 5 day transfer (2 embryos) 4/17/17- BFP! 
    Identical twins "due" 1/2/17 (but anticipated arrival sometime December)

  • 1) How far along are you? 11 weeks 4 days with twins

    2) How are you feeling physically and emotionally? Physically I'm doing alright over all. Got some dry heave issues still, especially in the morning. Mostly I'm just tired ALL. THE. TIME. Nothing like needing morning and afternoon naps, like a toddler, to function throughout the day.

    3) When is your next appointment? NT scan and bloodwork on June 8th. This is where my emotional stuff gets me. Gotta keep busy after that appointment to keep the anxiety level in check.

    4) Rants/Raves/Questions Rant: my hips already hurt also I hate the phrase: Advanced Maternal Age. Raves: I'm beginning to feel and look a bit pregnant, even with the extra fluff I carry, its kinda noticeable. I'm going maternity shopping with my mom this weekend. Should be tons of fun.

    5) GTKY: what job would you be terrible at? if money was no object what job would you love to do (even if you would be terrible at it?!?) I'm not super comfortable in big crowds so anything dealing with tons of people would send me screaming into the night. Official book reviewer/editor? I'd love to edit some of the stuff out there right now, my OCD might be showing a bit there.

    @baevn I'm completely feeling you on the BMI thing. I changed Ob's completely over this. Luckily I'm in an urban area that allows me to choose from many options. Nothing like visiting the ob to begin discussing fertility issues and possibly trying to start clomid and having the previous ob hand you the card for their preferred bariatric surgeon. Just thinking about it still angers me. Don't let yourself feel bullied over this. People say this over the breastfeeding/bottle issue but remember for us pregnant ladies also, FED is best right now. One thing that the infertility journey taught me is that no one but yourself and possibly partner will advocate for you, you've got to do it yourself. I hate conflict of any kind but sometimes you have to say that their language/behavior isn't okay with you. Also if this is a new policy they might need feedback and it may need to be adjusted.
  • baevnbaevn member
    @KLake42 totally! I am not remotely opposed to being educated about the risks I face during pregnancy. I could have handled like 

    Your BMI puts you at higher risk for A,B,C would you like more information for these things? These steps could help you decrease your chances of experiencing A,B,C. We would also like to send you for a few additional tests to just stay on top of it and make sure we have all the information about your pregnancy.

    I don't think I'd recommend a dietician unless the conversation gave naturally into that (i just don't know what to eat, I think I am eating too much etc.) They should also say nutrionist vs dietician. Dietician feels like they are putting you on a restrictive diet. 

    So far I have lost weight from being sick and general food aversions. The doctor I saw told me to keep an eye on it that he doesn't want me to continue to lose weight overall but he would be okay if my weight stayed the same as I would be actually losing weight as I gained baby. 
  • baevnbaevn member
    @stella_700 I am definitely stuck though I will have the OB/GYN who helped us conceive overseeing and ultimately fully taking care of me after 20 weeks and though he suggested I lose weight when we were ttc he hasn't said anything since I got pregnant about my weight. 

    I am just trying to let it go and focus on eating healthy, staying active etc and staying mentally healthy. I am accepting some days that means I eat two salads and totally on point and some days that means I eat bread for half my meals and have ice cream for dessert. I am focusing on living the 80/20 rule and being active everyday. 

    Thanks everyone for sharing my frustration!
  • @KLake42 Welcome!! (also feel free to jump in on the MOM thread!) I am so happy that they saw a membrane!! that is amazing news. try not to stress about food the first trimester. with nausea and food aversions it is often a matter of just getting through... and then the amount of calories they want you to consume is crazy pants... I was told 3000 cals/day.... I don't think I ever reached that goal, but also Protein, protein and more protein to get those babies growing. 
    @stella_700 i always had the count down to appointments... I'd have one and then the month wait till the next one seemed like forever. hang in there and we're here any time you need to DD.
    *TW*
    TTC 1/2012
    Diagnosed : unexplained infertility
    6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015
    TTC #3 5/2016
    Restarted Fertility tx
    IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17

  • @baevn when we met with the genetic counselor, she talked to us about statistics of all the things that could go wrong based on our age. It wasn't a fun topic, but it was information that we needed to know in order to make choices about tests and possible treatments. There was no age-shaming, nothing is going to make me 25 again, just like you aren't going to drastically change your BMI during pregnancy. I wish they could have approached BMI the same way with you. Give you information/statistics and your options, they could have even asked if you wanted to talk to a nutritionist, but it all should have been presented as YOUR choice, not a "you should really do this" thing. And to even mention "fat shaming", ugh. It's one thing to admit that a conversation is uncomfortable, but bringing that up just sounds defensive from the get go and makes it seem like that's what they were thinking. I'm so sorry these experiences happen. They make me want to shake medical staff and yell at them about all the research we have that shows shaming/guilt doesn't work, then sit them down for motivational interviewing and trauma informed care lectures. 

    Ok sorry, rant over. 
    Me: 39 SO: 36

    Dx: low progesterone, possible DOR - officially "unexplained"

    TTC#1 since November 2015
    9/16/2016 IUI#1 - BFN
    10/12/2016 IUI#2 - BFN
    1/21/2017 Clomid/IUI#3 - BFN
    March 2017 IVF: BFP! (beta#1 191, beta#2 378!) - it's a boy! DS born 12/6/2017

    TTC #2 since July 2018
    May 2019 IVF #2: BFP! (beta#1 346, beta#2 646) - vanishing twin at 8 weeks. Baby B still going strong - due 2/8/20!
    Pregnancy Ticker
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