TTC #2 at age 38

FirstTimer123 · May 2017

Hello all!

So I just turned 38 and we have decided to go for #2. My son just turned 5. Earlier on, were not considering a second but now, we really want #2 and I am so very impatient... I was pregnant with my son at age 32. Funny thing is, I went through 5 IUI's, an IVF, and a Frozen Embryo Transfer at that time because I have MS and doctor thought it would speed things up. So I did NOT get pregnant through ANY of that! However, I got pregnant 3 times naturally in the middle of all that! The pregnancies were 6 months apart generally... First two were chemical pregnancies and last one stuck!!

We have been trying for 3 months now... I am already impatient.. More because of my age! My husband is 43 and will be 44 in July... I have already seen a fertility specialist as we are considering IVF with gender selection... (Really want a little girl!) I am so nervous if we do it, though. Since I had no luck with it last time, why would it work now?? We may start that in the summer, though...

I am taking Pregnitude and husband is taking Fertile Aid. Hoping that helps. Got my period right on Mother's Day so that sucked...

Using Clearblue ovulation kit. I just ordered the one that predicts the 4 days of fertility so we don't waste time and my husband doesn't waste sperm!!!

How is everyone else doing??

katekate628 · May 2017

@FirstTimer123 welcome & good luck with #2! We usually do a weekly check in on the board so jump on in!

**TW**

My DS will be 5 in October and we are hoping for a sibling as well!! Going into our 7th month trying.

FirstTimer123 · May 2017

Thanks for the response! If you don't mind me asking, how old are you? Are you trying on your own or seeing a fertility specialist ?

katekate628 · May 2017

I'm going to be 37 in a few weeks. This is my 2nd month seeing an RE.

This board isn't super active like others, but everyone here is supportive and I like it here. I can't keep up with all the fast paced ones.

Labluver2 · May 2017

@FirstTimer123 welcome!! I will be 38 next month and just my first IUI. No children currently. This board and others have been super helpful and supportive.

SP128 · May 2017

Hi I'm 36 and trying for my first. I feel way behind. I'm going to do ivf this cycle Welcome

amberruka · May 2017

Welcome, I'm 38 trying for first. @SP128 ya know I love ya girl, but we're not "way behind." We're just dealing with life as it comes to us

amberruka · May 2017

It just didn't come the way we expected.

SP128 · May 2017

@amberruka you're right lady. SOmetimes it's so hard when other people my age have multiple children already and they are school aged It'll happen for us

vlagrl29 · May 2017

no one is way behind here. Sometimes it hurts me when I go to DDs activities and see other parents with siblings and I sit here and wonder if it will ever happen to us. I'm choosing to not go the medical intervention route at least now as I know that could change once I get closer to 40 but I just don't want the extra stress on me. It may take us 3 years but I really hope it does happen one day.

amberruka · May 2017

And we also don't know their story. Maybe they were lucky and met their SO's earlier than we did. Maybe they don't have the advanced degrees or general financial stability because of it. The grass isn't always greener on the other side of the fence, even if it looks that way.

FirstTimer123 · May 2017

I am sorry...but today on Facebook I saw an old high school classmate of mine (age 39) pregnant with her 5TH CHILD...!!!!!!! Over the years, she has been in and out of drug rehab, has almost had her children taken away from her by DSS, and all the kids have different dads. And here, there are SO many of us who are struggling and would give our child so much stability and love... Sorry, just a vent...

vlagrl29 · May 2017

Our neighbor has 3 kids, her H got fixed, she'd like to adopt one day. I may only have 1 kid currently, but I have the freedom to come and go as I please, go to yoga, take care of myself, go on dates with H - that makes me feel awesome. She's always one of those people that's never happy.

harleyquinn0621 · May 2017

FirstTimer123 welcome and GL!

i love this board.... i'm 35 and DH is 41.... we started trying for our first last year and i really did feel way behind... all my friends who plan on having kids already have multiple.. sometimes it's hard to remember that's just not everyone's path and we can only walk our own

SP128 · May 2017

@aberruka you and your rational brain are right. I need to think of the bigger picture and not just this cycle.

livingthedream-3 · May 2017

Welcome! Good Luck!

liljoy-2 · May 2017

Welcome. I'm still lurking here (TW...pregnant by IVF with my first). I'm 36 and after trying for 9 months I went the RE route. Turns out it was the right decision since the 35-38 window is the last reasonable window for good chances with IVF for people deemed "infertile" (aka trying for more than 6 mo). All the statistics the docs showed me are dire after that and after about a year spent on the Infertility board here, I don't think I remember much IVF success over 40 with own eggs

Again, people say but x and y in real life got pregnant with the 2nd/3rd at 41 etc. Well, of course there are cases like this, the fertility is not 0 in the general population at 40 but the stats are low. Plus, REs tell all of us that if you are seeing them it means you are not part of the general "fertile" population to begin with, so chances of a take home baby are way lower.

Your case is interesting since you were able to conceive naturally before while treatments failed....but keep in mind one failed IVF is not uncommon among women in their 30s. Did your RE offer any explanation why the treatments didn't work while it worked naturally?

Most of the times, I've seen the infertility in late 30s/40 is due to egg quality or quantity, while earlier than that it also may be due to endometriosis or PCOS.

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