One other thing to consider -- some REs recommend transferring only one embryo during your first embryo transfer just in case something else (god forbid) goes wrong, especially for unexplained infertility. Even if you have no history of implantation failure or loss, he likes to do one embryo the first time to see how your body responds, etc., and in the rare event that something goes wrong that is unrelated to the embryo, you've only lost one. That seems overly cautious compared to what I see on the IF board, though.
@leekat14 I was on Ganirelix but I believe it is similar. Definitely ice the injection spot and don't go slow - give it a good stab. Those shots left the biggest bruises on me though. Didn't burn as bad as the Menopur did for me.
The PIO shots are making me more sore than anything else so far. I feel it walking and sitting and god forbid something brushes against me! Ugh
@adirat That is a good perspective. Thanks for sharing!
My doc seems to be on the conservative side. He doesn't like to transfer more than 1 embryo at a time, PGS normal or not, to lower the risk of multiples and complications. If I hadn't done testing and we had more than one embryo, I'd push for two just to up the chances of success and hope he'd agree to my wishes. If you have to pay for each transfer I would understand wanting to transfer two for better odds. If each transfer were free or not massively expensive, I might opt for one at a time.
Me: late 30s | H: early 30s TTC #1 since April 2015 RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016 IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal Polyp removed May 2017 FET May 2017 - BFP! Baby boy born 2/2/18
@saralee797-2 ugh the PIO!! It's seriously the Bain of my existence and I'm so dreading starting it again. I remember being able to feel distinct golf ball lumps in my butt that made sitting really uncomfortable. Hang in there!
@heatherdubrow What cycle day do you start stuff for FET? I have my egg retrieval on Monday potentially...but I was trying to figure out how much of a break from needles I might actually get.
@laurad75 I'm so very sorry. Please take all the time you need and know that we are here to support you however we can.
@JuneRoseRuby so sorry for your losses. That sounds like so much to be dealing with all at once. We are here for you when you're ready from your hibernation.
lots of good perspectives and info about embryo transfers! Especially since so many of the ladies here are prepping or actively getting IVF!
AFM I had my US this morning, one follie on right ovary is 17, one on left is 20. They will call me around 12 to let me know if my BW indicates that I'm ovulating and then I would need to trigger right away but i took an OPK this morning and it was still negative, have EWCM so things are gearing up to O but I don't think so just yet. hoping we can trigger tonight at 730 but if not I decided I'm going to go home to do it and just come back to work. The midwife was very helpful today and took me into a room and gave me an empty syringe and told me what to do and had me push the needle in and showed me how to hold it for when I do it. Helped me to feel more relieved about it. Anyhow looks like IUI will likely be Saturday unless I have to trigger sooner than it would be tomorrow. Question- is the day of IUI considered O day?
@leekat14 my estrogen will start on roughly cd 5 and I'll continue the lupron (belly injection). I'm not sure how it works after ER because when I did mine I had to wait a couple months since I had OHSS. Woohoo for ER on Monday!!
@heatherdubrow I definitely think warming the oil and massaging after helps but the soreness is just unavoidable. My H and I did get a good laugh out of the butt massages though. Add it to the list of awkward things we have done while TTC.
@leekat14 Monday will be here before you know it! I hope you have some distractions lined up this weekend.
@beachbunnyxo123 Yayy! Good luck triggering and wishing you all the best for an IUI this weekend.
@beachbunnyxo123 Others can correct me if I'm wrong, but O day depends on the trigger, not the IUI. I had Ovidrel, which triggered O 36 hours after injection. I had my IUI on O day, but other doctors will do the IUI the day before O.
@saralee797-2 Ugh, not looking forward to the PIO then....the Del Estrogen shots haven't been too bad, no lingering soreness.
Me: late 30s | H: early 30s TTC #1 since April 2015 RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016 IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal Polyp removed May 2017 FET May 2017 - BFP! Baby boy born 2/2/18
@eggplantface@beachbunnyxo123 The trigger shot is supposed to trigger O 12-36 hours after. So there is some variance in there. Personally, I believe that I O'd in excess of 36 hours because my LP was always a day longer while doing medicated IUIs. I think it is safe to use the 36 hour mark for O but just keep in mind there is room for error. When I missed my period, my hopes went wayyy high.
It sort of feels like sore after a hard work out walking around but a bruise to the touch. But, hey, we will get through it right?!
@eggplantface@saralee797-2 that makes sense! I have been temping and doing opks just in case so I could have a better idea but I wasn't sure if the goal of the IUI was to do it before O or on O day.
Well, I officially belong on this thread now. To help others out, I'd like to say for the record that my RE said that going three months without a period after going off of the pill is not normal and that most women's cycles will regulate themselves naturally after three months off the pill. So, if you've been off of the pill for three months and haven't gotten a period, consider seeing a RE. I know that many of you were surprised that a RE would see me so soon, but I'm glad I followed my instincts.
Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): No idea. FF took away my CH yesterday but then put them back today. I did blood work today to see if I ovulated this month.
What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?) I had an ultrasound and blood work done today. My ovaries were slightly larger than normal and have a very mild PCOS appearance. My ovaries don't look like they're aging prematurely. I meet the "new" PCOS diagnostic criteria because I have polycystic-appearing ovaries and don't ovulate regularly. He thinks my androgen levels will come out normal since I have no symptoms of excess male hormones. He also thinks my egg quality will be fine once we do that testing. If I ovulated this month, we're going to give me 3 cycles of trying naturally with no drugs. If I didn't ovulate, we're going to do a SA, one natural month (since I'll be in Europe for half the month), and then start me on Femara.
How are things going? Good. I was prepared for the worst, so I'm encouraged by my diagnosis and by how optimistic my RE was about my chances.
Any questions? Nope.
GTKY: If you could get out of doing 1 chore/errand for the rest of your life, what would you never do again? Folding laundry. It just never ends. DH does loads of laundry but never folds them.
@sunniegrly I'm glad you got some answers. But did you really post your "f you all, peace out" and then just decide to post again without addressing it at all? And on top of it go "neener neener I was right" in your post here? I'm really trying to be on your side here, but nothing about that is cool.
@sunniegrly I would like to ask you a question in earnest. What do you want to get out of TTGP? This is the third time I've seen you post really defensive, aggressive, or unkind things toward regular members -- and I only read maybe half the threads. I don't understand what your end goal is here.
@sunniegrly glad you are getting answers, and it's great news that your cysts are mild (I'm assuminging there weren't that many of them? Did they say?) And that your androgens are expected to be normal. Gotta say, that sounds like pretty good news to me. Let us know how the progesterone draw goes.
@LoveinDC - I want people who search TB for "is it normal to go three months without a period after coming off of the pill" to find that as an answer and to know what was wrong with me (and to not listen if people on here tell them it's too early to see a RE). And no, nobody on here has been outright "mean" to me or called me names, but I got some passive-aggressive stuff when I posted on this thread before, and I got passive-aggressive responses to my other post. I wasn't going to call her out, but I see that I need to do so in order to reassure other people that their comments were not the ones that bothered me so much. Specifically, @heatherdubrow has made very passive-aggressive replies to me that have made me feel unwelcome. I would've let it pass, but then many people, some of whom I thought I'd gotten to know a little bit and who I liked, love-titted her passive aggressive post. "I'm surprised an RE would even see you at this point" = not helpful, not supportive, and most definitely a passive-aggressive way of telling me I was overreacting to my symptoms and didn't belong on the thread. I let it slide when I was posting on the IF thread and just moved to the dailies because, hey, maybe I didn't belong on the IF thread and I don't want to make those ladies hurt any worse than they already do. But then the exact same thing happened to me on the dailies on Saturday. Same passive-aggressive commenting from the same person. (I did find most of the other comments appropriate and helpful.) "I typed a lot of responses and don't even know what to say. You do you I guess" = passive-aggressive. People I liked love-titted the passive-aggressiveness. Nothing about any of that was cool. It was hurtful. Hence, the feeling that I was being ganged up on. Hence the dirty delete, passive-aggressive response. I felt like I was responding in kind.
I avoid the dailys like the plaugue so I had no idea any of that happened. @sunniegrly I sent you a message a few weeks ago detailing WHY you were getting a defensive response from our group. It bothers me that now you're acting as if you played no part and did nothing at all to warrent it. I want to be supportive. It's just hard when you seem to have so little self awareness.
@antoto - Right, which I totally understood. And I moved to the dailies. And then there was the passive-aggressive stuff again.
Yes because you hadn't really apologized to anyone. You kind of just threw a temper tantrum and stormed out. This isn't me being mean to you, I just feel like you need a reality check. People aren't being mean for funsies. @heatherdubrow is extremely kind and supportive to everyone on this board, myself included. It's not random that she has been defensive with you.
Normally I keep to my lurkdom and just PM in this thread as I don't want to make anyone having a hard day worse by being reminded of my status but I have to jump in and defend my girl @heatherdubrow ! @sunniegrly I do think you joined this thread way to early the first time around. You had just come off BC and were automatically assuming you had IF. This behavior comes across as dismissive of the struggles the women on this thread have had for years. What @heatherdubrow said was not passive aggressive. I too was surprised an RE would see you so early. I'm glad you are getting some answers but the women on TTGP are just responding to the vibes your putting out. Maybe step back and take a look at how your comments are being received. These are amazing ladies especially in the IF thread. They are warriors, brave, supportive but also fiercely protective. Its not going to go over well attacking a regular.
@sunniegrly It is standard among the OBGYN/RE community that they tend to write off post-pill anovulation and ask that you wait a number of months before seeing a specialist. Telling you that is not mean, unhelpful, or passive aggressive. Also letting you know that we're surprised an RE agreed to see you is not passive aggressive, it's reaffirming that it's not the norm. No one tried to talk you out of the appointment. Everyone just wanted to let you know what you were walking into.
You're doing a lot of reading into posts and love titting and reacting to that. @heatherdubrow tried to be supportive to you, and you responded in a way that took her aback. She is not out of line to imply your response was unwarranted. We have all gone above and beyond to say that we're trying to support you and we're coming from a place of love. All you've done is post aggressive and rude comments about us. You have not tried to see our side of things (like we tried to see yours) let alone apologized for all the rude things you've said about us and this community. You're not a victim here.
Ditto... @heatherdubrow is a wonderful person and super supportive/helpful member of this thread. She has been sitting with me through the worst, most impossible time of my life -- as have many women here.
Let me be real with you. You're rubbing people the wrong way. Hence my question about what your goal was here. I wasn't even here when you started but I see it. I can't imagine that's your intention right?
Plenty of people start off in ttgp on a weird foot and become beloved members. Ask in a thread some time how many ladies here have ever been flamed. It happens. But you gotta own it and move on. (Is there a real housewives gif for this? There should be!)
@sunniegrly I have to say I am still surprised that an RE would see you too; however, I am glad you are advocating for yourself and getting some answers. Good for you. To be fair though, based on your post you might not even need intervention. The way I saw the interactions was kind of like "whoa whoa whoa don't get ahead of yourself" with the hope of saving you some unnecessary worry/anxiety because we have been through it and it is not pretty. I 100% agree with @wabash here (thanks, girl) as she did articulate my feelings. Finally, I don't appreciate the dirty delete. Own whatever you wrote or apologize or whatever. You know that it is not how we roll but it kind of seems like you don't really care.
@LoveinDC - I want people who search TB for "is it normal to go three months without a period after coming off of the pill" to find that as an answer and to know what was wrong with me (and to not listen if people on here tell them it's too early to see a RE). And no, nobody on here has been outright "mean" to me or called me names, but I got some passive-aggressive stuff when I posted on this thread before, and I got passive-aggressive responses to my other post. I wasn't going to call her out, but I see that I need to do so in order to reassure other people that their comments were not the ones that bothered me so much. Specifically, @heatherdubrow has made very passive-aggressive replies to me that have made me feel unwelcome. I would've let it pass, but then many people, some of whom I thought I'd gotten to know a little bit and who I liked, love-titted her passive aggressive post. "I'm surprised an RE would even see you at this point" = not helpful, not supportive, and most definitely a passive-aggressive way of telling me I was overreacting to my symptoms and didn't belong on the thread. I let it slide when I was posting on the IF thread and just moved to the dailies because, hey, maybe I didn't belong on the IF thread and I don't want to make those ladies hurt any worse than they already do. But then the exact same thing happened to me on the dailies on Saturday. Same passive-aggressive commenting from the same person. (I did find most of the other comments appropriate and helpful.) "I typed a lot of responses and don't even know what to say. You do you I guess" = passive-aggressive. People I liked love-titted the passive-aggressiveness. Nothing about any of that was cool. It was hurtful. Hence, the feeling that I was being ganged up on. Hence the dirty delete, passive-aggressive response. I felt like I was responding in kind.
oh qfp just in case...
*TW*
TTC 1/2012 Diagnosed : unexplained infertility 6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015 TTC #3 5/2016 Restarted Fertility tx IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17
@sunniegrly I'm sorry but this just rubbed me the wrong way. I feel like this is very finger wagging and for the record I don't feel like you're saying it to help others out but to rather say "I was right". I would do anything to be in a situation to say I don't need this, not aggressively post to prove a point to the board that I did. I don't know anyone who would go through such an extent to get an IF diagnosis and then wave it around like a badge of honor, especially after 3 months or however long it's been. No one told you not to address your issue, they said not to assume IF so soon. Since you didn't care to notice, this week has been a tough one for a lot of our members here. And I'm angry that their legitimate concerns are being flooded away with posts pointed to your behavior. The only other time I've seen drama on the IF thread was from you so instead of name dropping @heatherdubrow who has always been a supportive regular here, why don't you take a look at your own actions as well.
@antoto@adirat@wabash15@LoveInDC@beachbunnyxo123@saralee797-2 And everyone else who love titted, Thank you for coming to my defense. I appreciate it more than you know. I have chosen to no longer respond to Sunnie's drama, so I appreciate every single one of you sticking up for me. I love you guys so much
@sunniegrly. Here's the thing. We are not here to blow smoke up anyone's hoo-has. That's not how we do things. As far as the weekend goes, @heatherdubrow raised a valid point bc honestly - someone announcing a bfp on Mother's Day is really not all that crazy, imho. And yes, there may have been other family members struggling, but maybe she struggled too. Who knows. Even if they didn't. I mean cmon. It's not all about you.
As I mentioned to you via PM, MH is very tough love with me on that stuff. And having a close friend or family member announce a bfp shouldn't really be this cataclysmic thing. Especially not a few short cycles into trying. If anything, I would love if the message newbies got from TTGP were, "toughen up, buttercup!" Cos somebody may be in for a wild ride, and saying, "oh you poor baby," is actually doing a disservice, imho. That's all I believe she was saying.
If you choose to react the way you did to that situation, skip the party etc., that's your prerogative. I believe like any of us, we just want each other to be happy. And sometimes that may mean growing a pair. J/s
@sunniegrly I'm really happy that you were able to get some answers and I'm sorry that you find yourself on this board. However I can help but wonder why you chose the 'i told you so' approach if you plan on participating in this thread. These girls are the most supportive people I have through this process and I can't stand to have you talk about them in any other way. @heatherdubrow was not rude but simply trying to share what she knew based on her experience. While my issues aren't the same as yours I was also told to not go to an RE until a year of trying. It is great that you advocated for yourself and got in much earlier than that but please don't come here to ask questions and then belittle those that give you answers you don't like. None of us claim to be experts. We can only offer advice from our experiences and what we've heard. In the end you are in charge of you. I hope that you stay here because this board is great but I recommend an attitude adjustment first.
@sunniegrly First off, I'm sorry about your dx and glad to hear you have a plan moving forward.
I am probably one of the people you're referring to as people you got along with who love titted a comment or 2 you didn't like. I reached out to you out of concern the first time you felt unhappy with the valid points voiced by members here and we talked it through a bit and I thought it was all good. Although I genuinely like you and have enjoyed interacting with you here, I agree with pretty much everything posted above. I don't think @heatherdubrow was being passive aggressive with you. That said, if I thought someone was being passive aggressive with me, which again, I don't think happened to me or to you, but if I THOUGHT this, I'd simply "block" this person (I believe it's called "ignore" on TB) and move on instead of inciting a bunch of drama for 2 days, which, as @beachbunnyxo123 correctly pointed out, buries the actual real shit that happened to other members who genuinely needed support this week. @adirat Made a particularly good point when asking, what do you want out of TTGP? If you wanted "support" with no questions, ever, is that really support? I've been wrong about tons of shit in my life, and if one of my friends has a point about my feelings or situation that I haven't explored, I want to hear it in order to be better informed. That's part of what support means.
As for the love titting, I'd like to point out that it can mean a lot of different things to me and to others. Here are some examples of what I've meant in my head when I've love titted something: - What you just said is fucking amazing and I love you and if we both weren't married I'd want to take your brain out to dinner and have wild sex with it. - Gee, I've never thought of that before. Good point! - I don't agree, but I think what you just said is interesting. - Thanks for acknowledging my question and/or comment--I have nothing to add so here's a love tit. - Congrats! - Sorry! - Thinking of you. etc. You get the point.
Yesterday I said you were welcome here if you wanted to stay. Honestly I think at this point you have alienated so many people that I don't think it's possible for you to stick around without creating more drama. Take that however you want. I still hope you get KU and that things turn out well for you. But this probably isn't the best place to work through the journey.
What I love about TB is the different perspectives everyone brings to pretty much everything we talk about and how it can open our minds. Living in a happy, positive bubble is boring. Besides that, it's fascist.
And just in case the cheese stands alone on that last quote:
Me: late 30s | H: early 30s TTC #1 since April 2015 RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016 IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal Polyp removed May 2017 FET May 2017 - BFP! Baby boy born 2/2/18
I agree with what @beachbunnyxo123@adirat and @heatherdubrow said. Also, just for the record, this is an infertility and testing thread, and while you did do some tests, having PCOS doesnt mean IF- some/many people have PCOS and get pregnant easily with no intervention within a few cycles. Some don't. Just like many people with hypothyroid get pregnant with no intervention. Some don't. Some people with low sperm counts get pregnant with no intervention. Some don't. PCOS can mean a greater chance of or be the cause of IF, but infertility is defined as not getting pregnant within a certain time period (different doctors determine how long that time period is based on age/other health factors/their specific ideas etc...), not necessarily just a disease. Dont assume IF just because of mildly cystic ovaries and an-O right after getting off BC. Especially because if/when (and I do sincerely hope when) you get pregnant in the next 2 or 3 months, and you wave around saying 'I had IF and got pregnant in 3 months!' that belittles what infertility is to the general population and minimizes the pain and heartache and time and effort and money that so many women have to go through.
I agree with what @beachbunnyxo123@adirat and @heatherdubrow said. Also, just for the record, this is an infertility and testing thread, and while you did do some tests, having PCOS doesnt mean IF- some/many people have PCOS and get pregnant easily with no intervention within a few cycles. Some don't. Just like many people with hypothyroid get pregnant with no intervention. Some don't. Some people with low sperm counts get pregnant with no intervention. Some don't. PCOS can mean a greater chance of or be the cause of IF, but infertility is defined as not getting pregnant within a certain time period (different doctors determine how long that time period is based on age/other health factors/their specific ideas etc...), not necessarily just a disease.
Truth. That B on 16 & Pregnant/ Teen Mom Maci Bookout has NIR PCOS and she has had THREE oopsie babies. THREE. I'm going to go punch some pillows right now.
That being said though, I think anyone who is TTC with an IF Dx for any amount of time belongs here. I just happened to get diagnosed just 6 months into TTC and because my PCOS is definitely not borderline/mild I started treatment pretty much right away.
I think a few of us got diagnosed/started treatment before the 12 month mark so I don't think we should have that as a requirement to participate here. Not saying that's what you were suggesting, @kiwi2628 I just wanted to put in my thoughts.
Well I've been busy the past couple days and obviously missed a lot. Just wanted to say I am thinking of you @JuneRoseRuby and I am so sorry you are having such a rough time. Thank you so much for updating. I was wondering what is going on with you. Our H's will be getting repeat SA around the same time so I'm hoping for some good news for us both.
@laurad75 I am so sorry to hear that. Hugs to you and I hope you get some useful answers at your upcoming appointments
Not addressing all the drama cause I have nothing else to add.
I agree with what @beachbunnyxo123@adirat and @heatherdubrow said. Also, just for the record, this is an infertility and testing thread, and while you did do some tests, having PCOS doesnt mean IF- some/many people have PCOS and get pregnant easily with no intervention within a few cycles. Some don't. Just like many people with hypothyroid get pregnant with no intervention. Some don't. Some people with low sperm counts get pregnant with no intervention. Some don't. PCOS can mean a greater chance of or be the cause of IF, but infertility is defined as not getting pregnant within a certain time period (different doctors determine how long that time period is based on age/other health factors/their specific ideas etc...), not necessarily just a disease.
Truth. That B on 16 & Pregnant/ Teen Mom Maci Bookout has NIR PCOS and she has had THREE oopsie babies. THREE. I'm going to go punch some pillows right now.
What.
Good thing I already had a drink in my hand reading that.
Re: IF/Testing Weekly Check-in 5/15
The PIO shots are making me more sore than anything else so far. I feel it walking and sitting and god forbid something brushes against me! Ugh
@adirat That is a good perspective. Thanks for sharing!
TTC #1 since April 2015
RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016
IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN
IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal
Polyp removed May 2017
FET May 2017 - BFP!
Baby boy born 2/2/18
@kiki75 so sorry girl, hugs
@laurad75 I'm so very sorry. Please take all the time you need and know that we are here to support you however we can.
@JuneRoseRuby so sorry for your losses. That sounds like so much to be dealing with all at once. We are here for you when you're ready from your hibernation.
lots of good perspectives and info about embryo transfers! Especially since so many of the ladies here are prepping or actively getting IVF!
AFM I had my US this morning, one follie on right ovary is 17, one on left is 20. They will call me around 12 to let me know if my BW indicates that I'm ovulating and then I would need to trigger right away but i took an OPK this morning and it was still negative, have EWCM so things are gearing up to O but I don't think so just yet. hoping we can trigger tonight at 730 but if not I decided I'm going to go home to do it and just come back to work. The midwife was very helpful today and took me into a room and gave me an empty syringe and told me what to do and had me push the needle in and showed me how to hold it for when I do it. Helped me to feel more relieved about it. Anyhow looks like IUI will likely be Saturday unless I have to trigger sooner than it would be tomorrow. Question- is the day of IUI considered O day?
Woohoo for ER on Monday!!
@leekat14 Monday will be here before you know it! I hope you have some distractions lined up this weekend.
@beachbunnyxo123 Yayy! Good luck triggering and wishing you all the best for an IUI this weekend.
@saralee797-2 Ugh, not looking forward to the PIO then....the Del Estrogen shots haven't been too bad, no lingering soreness.
TTC #1 since April 2015
RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016
IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN
IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal
Polyp removed May 2017
FET May 2017 - BFP!
Baby boy born 2/2/18
It sort of feels like sore after a hard work out walking around but a bruise to the touch. But, hey, we will get through it right?!
Diagnosis (If you've been): mild/borderline NIR PCOS
Cycle/CD: 2/21
Any questions? Nope.
GTKY: If you could get out of doing 1 chore/errand for the rest of your life, what would you never do again? Folding laundry. It just never ends. DH does loads of laundry but never folds them.
Married: 2013
TTC #1: 2/2017
Dx: mild/borderline NIR PCOS
May TTGP Siggy Challenge - Awkward Prom Photos:
Also +1 @loveindc
Married: 2013
TTC #1: 2/2017
Dx: mild/borderline NIR PCOS
May TTGP Siggy Challenge - Awkward Prom Photos:
Married: 2013
TTC #1: 2/2017
Dx: mild/borderline NIR PCOS
May TTGP Siggy Challenge - Awkward Prom Photos:
@heatherdubrow I
all my IF ladies I am rooting like hell for each and every one of you. Sorry again for the intrusion I just could not keep my mouth shut. I
Diagnosed : unexplained infertility
6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015
TTC #3 5/2016
Restarted Fertility tx
IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17
You're doing a lot of reading into posts and love titting and reacting to that. @heatherdubrow tried to be supportive to you, and you responded in a way that took her aback. She is not out of line to imply your response was unwarranted. We have all gone above and beyond to say that we're trying to support you and we're coming from a place of love. All you've done is post aggressive and rude comments about us. You have not tried to see our side of things (like we tried to see yours) let alone apologized for all the rude things you've said about us and this community. You're not a victim here.
Let me be real with you. You're rubbing people the wrong way. Hence my question about what your goal was here. I wasn't even here when you started but I see it. I can't imagine that's your intention right?
Plenty of people start off in ttgp on a weird foot and become beloved members. Ask in a thread some time how many ladies here have ever been flamed. It happens. But you gotta own it and move on. (Is there a real housewives gif for this? There should be!)
Diagnosed : unexplained infertility
6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015
TTC #3 5/2016
Restarted Fertility tx
IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17
Also is this a first? Drama in the IF thread?
As I mentioned to you via PM, MH is very tough love with me on that stuff. And having a close friend or family member announce a bfp shouldn't really be this cataclysmic thing. Especially not a few short cycles into trying. If anything, I would love if the message newbies got from TTGP were, "toughen up, buttercup!" Cos somebody may be in for a wild ride, and saying, "oh you poor baby," is actually doing a disservice, imho. That's all I believe she was saying.
If you choose to react the way you did to that situation, skip the party etc., that's your prerogative. I believe like any of us, we just want each other to be happy. And sometimes that may mean growing a pair. J/s
*typos
I am probably one of the people you're referring to as people you got along with who love titted a comment or 2 you didn't like. I reached out to you out of concern the first time you felt unhappy with the valid points voiced by members here and we talked it through a bit and I thought it was all good. Although I genuinely like you and have enjoyed interacting with you here, I agree with pretty much everything posted above. I don't think @heatherdubrow was being passive aggressive with you. That said, if I thought someone was being passive aggressive with me, which again, I don't think happened to me or to you, but if I THOUGHT this, I'd simply "block" this person (I believe it's called "ignore" on TB) and move on instead of inciting a bunch of drama for 2 days, which, as @beachbunnyxo123 correctly pointed out, buries the actual real shit that happened to other members who genuinely needed support this week. @adirat Made a particularly good point when asking, what do you want out of TTGP? If you wanted "support" with no questions, ever, is that really support? I've been wrong about tons of shit in my life, and if one of my friends has a point about my feelings or situation that I haven't explored, I want to hear it in order to be better informed. That's part of what support means.
As for the love titting, I'd like to point out that it can mean a lot of different things to me and to others. Here are some examples of what I've meant in my head when I've love titted something:
- What you just said is fucking amazing and I love you and if we both weren't married I'd want to take your brain out to dinner and have wild sex with it.
- Gee, I've never thought of that before. Good point!
- I don't agree, but I think what you just said is interesting.
- Thanks for acknowledging my question and/or comment--I have nothing to add so here's a love tit.
- Congrats!
- Sorry!
- Thinking of you.
etc. You get the point.
Yesterday I said you were welcome here if you wanted to stay. Honestly I think at this point you have alienated so many people that I don't think it's possible for you to stick around without creating more drama. Take that however you want. I still hope you get KU and that things turn out well for you. But this probably isn't the best place to work through the journey.
Good luck.
EDD: March 24, 2018 - angel baby at 21 weeks
What I love about TB is the different perspectives everyone brings to pretty much everything we talk about and how it can open our minds. Living in a happy, positive bubble is boring. Besides that, it's fascist.
And just in case the cheese stands alone on that last quote:
TTC #1 since April 2015
RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016
IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN
IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal
Polyp removed May 2017
FET May 2017 - BFP!
Baby boy born 2/2/18
Truth. That B on 16 & Pregnant/ Teen Mom Maci Bookout has NIR PCOS and she has had THREE oopsie babies. THREE. I'm going to go punch some pillows right now.
That being said though, I think anyone who is TTC with an IF Dx for any amount of time belongs here. I just happened to get diagnosed just 6 months into TTC and because my PCOS is definitely not borderline/mild I started treatment pretty much right away.
I think a few of us got diagnosed/started treatment before the 12 month mark so I don't think we should have that as a requirement to participate here. Not saying that's what you were suggesting, @kiwi2628 I just wanted to put in my thoughts.
@laurad75 I am so sorry to hear that. Hugs to you and I hope you get some useful answers at your upcoming appointments
Not addressing all the drama cause I have nothing else to add.
Good thing I already had a drink in my hand reading that.