National Infertility Awareness Week

ForwardnBackward · April 2017

In recognition of Infertility Awareness Week, does anyone wanna share their journey with infertility or trouble TTC? I know many of us have shared stories here or there but I thought maybe it was fitting thread to start for support and raising awareness.

ChocolateIsLife · April 2017

This is a great thread to start. I am pretty sure I have talked about my IF on here a lot, but it truly helps to be able to speak about something that has the stigma of being kept private. We started trying after our wedding over 6 years ago. I went off birth control and started having abnormal bleeding and severe pain every month. Fast forward one year with all negative tests, we found that i had endometriosis, and had it removed. Several years of trying later, we found out that I had several fibroids that were in compromising locations, so I had to have another surgery. That surgery was horrific and I'll save it for another thread, but one of my worst experiences ever. The endometriosis came back as well so I had to have that removed. After a year of different meds with the fertility doc, I was referred to IVF as a last effort. I developed moderate OHSS after my egg retrieval and had to be on bedrest for a week. The day my FET was scheduled, my gallbladder decided to give me hell, and had to have emergency gallbladder surgery instead. 3-4 weeks later I had my FET. My protocol worked and here I am. There is so much in between this time. A lot of grief and anger with my body. I was incredibly insecure, because on top of not being able to conceive, I had bad hormonal acne, and couldn't take anything that worked because I was TTC, and lived with cramps every day for the entire TTC journey. Work was challenging-my cramps were unbearable at times, and I ruined several expensive office chairs because I bled through my pad/tampon after 1 hour, and this happened several times. I felt like I was looked at like a slacker at work because I either was in so much pain I couldn't go in, or a had doctors appointments at times. Lots of distancing from people around me because I didn't know how to communicate what I was going through. I feel like I put my life on hold in a way. IF really sucks, and it still lingers with me while pregnant. Now that I know my fibroids are growing, I have this fear in the back of my head that they are going to interfere with this pregnancy. I wish I could be worry-free, but IF reprogrammed me to have zero trust in my body. As I type this I am so grateful that we were lucky enough to get pregnant, and I am thankful every day and try and do things to remind myself that I am pregnant today. Both DH and I are solid, and he has been by my side through everything. Sorry, I hope someone has an uplifting IF journey they can share as well! I really am a pretty happy person, this is just part of the dark times that we have grown from.

ForwardnBackward · April 2017

@ChocolateIsLife wow what a journey. I'll keep everything crossed that those fibroids don't interfere with you starting your family!

ForwardnBackward · April 2017

I had unexplained infertility. I stopped birth control the moment we moved into our house and then we started trying. Ovulation sticks, basal body temperature monitoring, so much timed intercourse, supplements, acupuncture, and finally Femera. No real explanation for our struggles so finally after a year and half and in my 3rd cycle of Femera i got an HSG to make sure my tubes were open and they were, so we were teeing up for IUI the next month. But then got pregnant that month following HSG. I suspect maybe I had a minor blockage that the HSG opened up that month.

We didn't struggle getting pregnant this time (2 months TTC), so there is some truth to pregnancy "reseting" whatever that unexplained reason was for our particular struggles.

I started to be a little open about our struggles on Facebook with some vague-booking during my journey and I found so much comfort in others that reached out to me to say "Hey I've been there... if you wanna talk I'm here"

ChocolateIsLife · April 2017

@ForwardnBackward thanks girl! We are keeping our fingers crossed that it doesn't create any extra issues.

I can only imagine how frustrating and discouraging it is to try so hard and not know why you can't get pregnant. I have heard that the HSG helps clear things out and ups the chance of a bfp. So glad that happened for you!!

callababy17 · April 2017

Thank you both for sharing your stories. I had unexplainable IF also. TTC for 2.5 years. HSG and IUI with no luck. Diagnosed with endo last summer and had a laparoscopy. About 6 months later just got pregnant out of nowhere. 2 solid years of bbt, ovulation tests,normal periods, regular sex and negative pregnancy tests....it really takes a toll on a person and a relationship. We feel so grateful for this experience.

bluejeanbabi05 · April 2017

Thank you for sharing your stories everyone, and to @ForwardnBackward for starting this thread. I haven't been starting the PGAIF thread lately, because I've been so anxious about things I've been wanting to keep my posts mostly light-hearted. Please feel free, anyone, to take that thread over if you would like!

DH and I had been ttc about ten months when my ob recommended DH have an SA, just to see. It came back 0% morphology, so we made the decision to move to a urologist and an RE instead of trying things out with my ob. The RE wasn't too concerned about the morphology, but he was very concerned about my wildly varying, unpredictable cycles. Did all the tests and I was dx with both PCOS and a uterine septum (a wall that almost divided my uterus in half. There was no blood flow in that wall, so if baby implanted there it could lead to mc or failed implantation.)

I went on metformin, which was a miracle drug that immediately regulated my cycles.

I had two surgeries to correct the septum, the second of which found endo and that was removed too.

Still no luck after, and RE recommended we move right to IVF, he wasn't enthusiastic about our IUI chances. This was early January, and we signed up for the March IVF group. Since there was a full cycle in between, I decided literally last-minute, on day 3, that an IUI couldn't hurt.

And it worked. We were so shocked, so was my RE.

IF sucks. I'm glad we're all on the other end.

folamij · April 2017

I never had regular periods. At 19 I was diagnosed with PCOS. The jerk of a doctor actually told me I wouldn't ever have kids. Fast forward to meeting my DH. We decided to start ttc after being married 3.5 years. After trying without success we were sent to a fertility specialist. Several tests were run (hsg, etc) and the Dr. disagreed with my prior PCOS diagnosis. I began hormone therapy and after is when DH and I decided to not pursue fertility treatments anymore. ***TW**** A few months after taking a natural supplement; I discovered I was pregnant. I miscarried shortly after. I was apparently close to the end of the first tri, but since I had irregular periods I didn't think anything of it. **END TW***
DH and I decided to try again when I felt emotionally ready and I successfully carried our DD to term (though not without freaking out that everything would be ok). When DD was a few months old a regular period returned. I was able to learn my cycle and track ovulation successfully for the first time ever in my life! We decided to try again and were over the moon when we discovered I was pregnant. We are beyond thankful for this chance again.

relax&smile2 · April 2017

Folamij- Were you ever diagnosed with anything else? I was misdiagnosed with PCOS as well. Geneticist confirmed it was actually NCCAH.

Amesie13 · April 2017

It has been good to read all your stories I thought I would share mine also. My husband and I waited till about 10 months after we got married to start trying (we were 28 at the time) I had already been taking my basal body temp and checking cm for a while. I tried vitamins and special lubes and ovulation tests (which would almost always show a positive) and we kept trying for about 12 months before seeing a RE. After all the tests they could not figure out what was up so it was unexplained infertility. It was really hard for me my sister got pregnant after trying for 2 months when I had been trying for 6 months at that point and had twins and I felt like everyone else could get pregnant but me. We decided to do a medicated cycle of IUI with me taking clomid which actually worked and I got pregnant back around Christmas but found out at the 5 week ultrasound that it was a chemical pregnancy. It has been really hard on me I really miss the baby we lost. I was waiting for my period to come back normally after I had the bleed from the loss and knew that your first period after a loss can take a long time but I decided to take a pregnancy test and instead of sitting next to the test I knew if would be negative and took a shower and then checked the test and was kinda shocked that I saw another faint line. I did not really believe it and then took another two tests 3 days later and it was dark lines then. I am still kinda surprised I am pregnant and still get anxious about the whole pregnancy seeing as how my previous history with a loss is and all. Mostly just cautiously optimistic at this point. Thanks for reading.

callababy17 · April 2017

@Amesie13 thank you for sharing. We experienced a chemical pregnancy, too. I took a test after missing my period for a week (2years ago) and was ecstatic to find it positive. It was the morning of my sister in laws bb shower and I was devastated when the bleeding started two days later. It is just so hard to go through that when everyone else seems to get pregnant at the drop of a hat.

Cythe · April 2017

Hi loves, I've been absent for a bit (for which I apologize). I'm so happy its NAIW, I have some very near and dear friends who are still struggling.

We have been TTC more or less for 3 years, I say more or less because we also had a deployment in there. We tried on our own for 1 year, and started IF testing. Everything came back normal, and we were diagnosed as unexplained. We did 3 IUI's with a military doctor and after those failed, we went to a civilian doc for IVF since the military has 0 IVF coverage, we figured we may as well get better care with a civilian. We did our first round of IVF just before my husband left on deployment. Unfortunately, there was no way for us to know that all but 3 of my eggs would be immature and therefore not able to be fertilized. We learned a lot from that IVF, which was evident in our second try.

After H got home, we started our second round of IVF. This one went much better, and we ended up with 12 retrieved, 11 mature and 5 fertilized. We got 3 beautiful day 5 blasts out of the deal. We transferred one embryo 5 days after egg retrieval, but that unfortunately ended in a loss. There is nothing quite like the loss of an IVF baby - and please dont think I mean to belittle naturally conceived losses because I don't. The added financial aspect just makes it so much harder to accept.

We started FET prep on New Years, and after some dodgy information about Zika (we had gone on vacation over christmas) determined that the real risk was in using eggs and sperm that could have been affected, but since ours were already frozen we felt confident that we could transfer without issues. We did, I got my positive 4 days after transfer (THE ONLY BENEFIT OF IVF!) and here we are!

ForwardnBackward · April 2017

@bluejeanbabi05 I'm glad you're on the other side of it too! You went through alot to get here!

ForwardnBackward · April 2017

@c allababy17 It does take a toll, it's impacted our sex life going forward since it was SO MUCH WORK at that time.

ForwardnBackward · April 2017

@Amesie13 Thanks for story. The chemical pregnancy after having TTTC and IUI would've have devastated me. I'm sorry to hear that you had that experience. I also have a sibling that seemingly can get pregnant at the drop of the hat, fortunately none of her pregnancies really coincidence with my struggle otherwise I would've really really struggled with it.

ForwardnBackward · April 2017

Cythe What a journey! Very happy for your family!

folamij · April 2017

@relax&smile2 I was. I forget the technical term the Dr. used (I'll have to go check my med sheet), but essentially my hormonal levels were way off. Apparently, the ovarian cysts is why the original Dr. deemed me as having PCOS. I know I can't take any form of birth control as a result if that makes sense.

buttercream_frosting · April 2017

Ladies, you are all amazing and so brave to share your stories. I wish you all the best on your journey.

kdel921 · April 2017

Thank you ladies for sharing your stories. We got married towards the end of 2014 and started trying. It was more of a not trying, not preventing. After several months of no luck we were full on trying. Again no luck.

Towards the end of last summer I started getting tested to see if there was a hormonal issue going on but everything came back within range. DH went for a SA and the results were devastating so he found a urologist that specialized in IF. Luckily the 2nd SA was much more promising and we went to a RE for a work up. I did all the testing to rule out any potential issues.

Due to DHs severe MFI we went straight for IVF with ICSI. It was our only option. So I did IVF but froze the day 5 blasts and did a FET transfer this Jan. We were lucky bc it worked.

Only a few close friends knew we did IVF and our families knew. I know of 1 couple that did IVF while all our other friends got pregnant by surprise or planned it and it worked within a few months or so. Of course you are happy for everyone but sometimes it's a discouraging when you feel like everyone else can get pregnant no problem while you struggle somewhat silently.

ChocolateIsLife · April 2017

@callababy17 and @forwardnBackward you are so right about it impacting sex life. Not able to be spontaneous, being prescribed when/how many times to have sex. I actually forgot about that. We are just getting back into having sex since the beginning of January, and it is different. I cant remember the last time we had sex without purpose, so it is a refreshing experience!

@bluejeanbabi05 I am so glad that they were able to repair your septum, and find sneaky endo while in there!

@folamij I’m so sorry for your loss. Your previous doctor sounds like an ass.

@amesie13 thank you for sharing your story. Cautiously optimistic is the perfect description of PAIF.

Thank you everyone for sharing your story. I am so happy that everyone has made it to this board.

ForwardnBackward · April 2017

@kdel921. I was going to take a Facebook hiatus because I just couldn't take it anymore seeing everyone get pregnant (then I got pregnant that month). Previously i had unfriended a girl from high school because I hadn't really kept in touch anyways and it seemed like her children/pregnancy posts really bothered me. Well she refriended me at some point and i was like "whelp okay whatever fine" and then following one of my vague-bookings about TTTC she PMed me saying she went through every and all IF testing and work-up, it all if I ever wanted to chat, I felt like a jerk for her posts ever bothering me. You never know who may be struggling or have struggled.

kdel921 · April 2017

@ForwardnBackward That's so true. You never know what people are going through behind closed doors unless they choose to be open about it. It can certainly put things in perspective.

ladyglittersparkles · April 2017

Thank you all for sharing your stories ❤❤❤

virginiaham · April 2017

Thank you for starting this thread @ForwardnBackward and ladies for sharing your stories and sharing support.

We conceived through NIR-PCOS and two cycles of Femara+trigger+TI with LP Progesterone, months of Levothyroxine, Metformin, and acupuncture, one loss and a total of 16-17ish months of charting/TTC with a deployment thrown in there.

****potential TW**** This week my IF looks like deep gratitide and amazement that I never thought I'd get to this point and at the same time longing to reach viability to know that if my body fails this baby, he/she has a chance of making it outside of me. ****end TW****

My heart hurts for those struggling through IF to even get to a BMB and I'm keeping my situation in perspective. I certainly limit where I say this and ONLY say this here as my audience shares a BMB with me, but if IF has challenged this pregnancy, know you aren't alone and it's ok to struggle with IF even though you are pregnant, or have a baby, or have decided you're done TTC after a baby. For those who don't feel like you're past or beyond or on the other side of IF, you aren't alone. I'm sitting with you.

bluejeanbabi05 · April 2017

@virginiaham beautiful words. It's strange how both far away and up close I feel to IF. It's robbed so much of the enjoyment from this pregnancy for me, and sometimes all I can focus on is how anxious I am and how much I don't want to return to the desperation of IF, and then days like this really open my eyes and make me remember that today my baby is healthy and I need to focus more on how grateful I am for that.

Mommaswizz · April 2017

I can't thank you all enough for sharing these stories and struggles. I have several close friends dealing with IF and this gives me more insight to the roller coaster that this process is. I can only hope i've been a good friend and said the right things and been a good shoulder to cry on and ear to vent to. You guys are miraculous and brave for sharing.

TallMomma29 · April 2017

Thank you all for sharing your stories.

I did not have a major IF struggle, but it took 13 cycles to get pregnant with our first, and I remember how frustrating and heartbreaking the negatives were each month, and how much it stung when friends and family members seemed to get pregnant so easily, so I can relate in at least a small way. So many people in my family got pregnant so easily that it never crossed my mind that I might struggle for awhile. Like you ladies, I'm so happy to be on the other side!

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