Just adding in on the marriage topic. Don't be afraid. My husband and I didn't really fight ( never really do. We bicker but more like an elderly couple bicker. We name call slightly and calmly then kiss and hug all while making comprimises on both ends. We only struggled with communication on the kids' needs. Like I shouldn't have to ask for help if you see me trying to get food on the table while baby is crying and preschooler was coloring on the walls. So while not every marriage will truly struggle , there will be times of trying to properly communicate to each other and really speaking your mind. Don't hold anything back but remember he's your husband and you kinda like him . In all seriousness, the journey is a trying one, but an amazing one too.
Just adding in on the marriage topic. Don't be afraid. My husband and I didn't really fight ( never really do. We bicker but more like an elderly couple bicker. We name call slightly and calmly then kiss and hug all while making comprimises on both ends. We only struggled with communication on the kids' needs. Like I shouldn't have to ask for help if you see me trying to get food on the table while baby is crying and preschooler was coloring on the walls. So while not every marriage will truly struggle , there will be times of trying to properly communicate to each other and really speaking your mind. Don't hold anything back but remember he's your husband and you kinda like him . In all seriousness, the journey is a trying one, but an amazing one too.
Yesssss this is how DH and I are, too. We've probably had like 3 "angry" fights in the 13 years we've been together (2/3 of those alcohol was involved, just saying). That first year with DD was tough, but doable. We learned a lot about each other and our marriage...and how to actually communicate when we needed something.
I mean, here's the thing. Keep expectations realistic. I went into my first year of marriage expecting the worst year of my life (because that's what everyone kept telling me! Such changes! Living together! It's going to be so hard!). It was tough. But nowhere near the worst year of my life. There will be good days and bad days, awesome days and rock-bottom days. But that's what you signed up for with marriage. The best bud to go through all those cycles with.
BFP#1: 12/3/13 EDD 8/15/13. Heartbeat found on 12/26/13, HB gone on 1/4/13. D&C 1/7/13
BFP#2: 4/19/13 EDD 12/28/13. Team Green for pregnancy and Baby Girl arrived 12/21/13. BFP#3: 2/9/13 EDD 10/18/17. Team Green for Round 2!
@roo_baby I think for everyone its different...I had nausea most days from about 6 weeks to 12 weeks and then on the last day of my first trimester I had a really tough day (vomiting all day long). After that though, the nausea basically went away and my energy started to increase day over day.
Anyone here have a family history of factor 5 (blood clotting disorder)?Did it affect your pregnancy at all? For the record, I've called the doctor's office twice trying to speak with the nurse because I had forgotten to mention testing when I was there for my first appointment. Left messages both times. No response yet. *Insert eye-rolling emoji* I'm afraid to google :X
I have factor 5 and it made a huge difference in my first pregnancy. For starters I had to inject myself with lovenox from day one of a positive pregnancy test. I continued to inject for 12 weeks after birth too. I also had to see a perinatologist because of it from 12 weeks on. I had to be monitored more closely because it made me much more likely to have preeclampsia. By the last couple of months I had to go to the doctor twice a week. This pregnancy is the same. I'm already seeing a perinatologist because of factor 5 and of course I'd need to see one anyway because of having twins. And I'm doing the daily injections again. @feeislove
Siggy Warning: Loss, Living Child, Pregnancy mentioned
TTC Since August 2009
IUI #1, D/C December 2012
IUI #2, Natural MC March 2013
IUI #3 BFN
IUI #4 BFP Due April 2014
Rainbow Baby DS1 born April 2014 via emergency C-Section
IUI #5 February 1, 2017.....BFP due 10/25/17 with TWINS! --9w5d vanishing twin.
@mandmplus1 Oh wow that sounds serious. I'm getting my blood drawn to test for it tomorrow. I'll keep everyone posted. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous
Me: 29 DH: 32 Married 9/27/2014 TTC Since 1/1/2017 BFP: 2/6/2017 Due Date: 10/13/17
Has anyone had any experience with the Sequenom testing Maternit21 or Vitalit? I'm being offered these tests next week but haven't really heard about them.
Thoughts, suggestions, feedback all very appreciated
@nmingram I used disposable last time. I can't imagine having MORE laundry to do with a newborn.
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I heart theSkimm I heart YNAB --------- “Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light." - Albus Dumbledore
@nmingram, I had an oversupply and leaked like crazy. So I used disposable and was changing them frequently. I had considered reusable (I've heard they're softer on your nipples) but couldn't keep up with the laundry!
disposable bc i hate Earth. but also make sure you get these. you will need them in the few days after birth when you feel like your nipples are going to fall off. don't worry that pain only lasts a few days. but you need these to get you through.
nmingram I used a combination of both. I didn't leak much so filling them wasn't such an issue. The disposable ones make your boobs look all lumpy so if I were going somewhere where I dressed nice I would use the reusable ones. And yes they are so soft and comfy, but I could see if you leaked a bunch that they would be useless. They are pretty thin.
Has anyone had any experience with the Sequenom testing Maternit21 or Vitalit? I'm being offered these tests next week but haven't really heard about them.
Thoughts, suggestions, feedback all very appreciated
i do all the tests available bc i dunno i am crazy. it is a personal choice, but for me the more information i have the better. I think my practice offers the panorama which is the same, i did it for DD2 (it wasn't available for DD1 unless over 35). But i dont think not doing them is bad either! just whatever you want!
Has anyone had any experience with the Sequenom testing Maternit21 or Vitalit? I'm being offered these tests next week but haven't really heard about them.
Thoughts, suggestions, feedback all very appreciated
@VLillyV I just had this done, so I'll chime in. It's just a blood test which uses the fetal DNA that mixes with your blood to test for chromosomal abnormalities and can also tell you the sex I'd that's something you're interested in knowing. I had to specifically check the box saying "I want you to test for the Y chromosome" ect, but I don't think that every test has that. I know many women have just been blindsided by the doc saying Congrats it's a ...so be aware.
The test isn't fool proof, but my doc said it is useful to bring up potential issues so at a later appointment we can explore that further.
TTC #1 since May 2014 3 failed IUI cycles Oct '15 - IVF 1 - 10R, 3M, 0F Sept '16 - IVF - 12R, 11M, 5F and 3 perfect day 5 blasts - MMC 7w5d Jan '17 - FET 1 - BFP, EDD 10/14
Hi STM's! What pregnancy pillow did you use previously? I am a stomach/back sleeper and am thinking I will have to get either a C or U shaped pillow in order for me to be comfortable as I get bigger...
@ezavasky I have this one and I love it! You can get similar pillows for less on Amazon but I can't speak for the quality.
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I heart theSkimm I heart YNAB --------- “Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light." - Albus Dumbledore
@ezavasky, I didn't buy a pregnancy pillow. But my nursing pillow was perfect to use as a pregnancy pillow as well. It's the Jolly Jumper one. I love it!!!
@ezavasky I personally found that giant U pillow really cumbersome. I tried a straight long body pillow and disliked that as well. I ended up using a few pillows but may try out the snoogle this time.
Hi STM's! What pregnancy pillow did you use previously? I am a stomach/back sleeper and am thinking I will have to get either a C or U shaped pillow in order for me to be comfortable as I get bigger...
I got the snoogle C shaped body pillow. It was a game changer for me but didn't do the trick in the later stages (but nothing really does). I've been thinking about busting it out already since I toss and turn now.
TTC x 1.5 years.
Acupuncture, Femera x3 cyles, and HSG. BFP in September 2014, DS born June 2015. TTC x2 months. BFP January 2017.
@VLillyV I did not do the testing with my first pregnancy and I'm electing not to do it this time either. The results wouldn't change anything for me because I wouldn't terminate and I know we will find out more at the 20 week anatomy scan so I'm just going to wait.
Siggy Warning: Loss, Living Child, Pregnancy mentioned
TTC Since August 2009
IUI #1, D/C December 2012
IUI #2, Natural MC March 2013
IUI #3 BFN
IUI #4 BFP Due April 2014
Rainbow Baby DS1 born April 2014 via emergency C-Section
IUI #5 February 1, 2017.....BFP due 10/25/17 with TWINS! --9w5d vanishing twin.
Apologies if this has been asked a million times before, but I'm just wondering of the STM+ ladies: how did you decide when to tell your employer? I'm not showing yet, but obviously taking a lot of medical appointment time for bloodwork, US, MW appts, etc. and I'm sure it'll raise suspicions soon enough!
@keiraanne With DS I didn't tell until I was almost out of first tri. It was fairly easy because it was around the holidays. This time I've already told them. Mostly because I just don't want to have to worry about the "telling" anymore.
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I heart theSkimm I heart YNAB --------- “Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light." - Albus Dumbledore
@keiraanne it depends on your relationship with your employer. I told my last employer pretty quickly because I was close with her and I was also puking in the restrooms on a regular basis. We had a pretty gossipy office and didn't want something getting back to her before I had the chance to.
This pregnancy I also told my boss pretty early for the same reason - puking a lot and my brain seems to be a bowl of jelly for the first few weeks. I have a lot more responsibilities in this new position and I knew he'd notice if things fell through the cracks. We're waiting to tell my direct reports until I'm at the 12 week mark, although I'm pretty sure they suspect something at this point. I also wanted to start the conversation of how my maternity leave would go because I'm asking for a rather unconventional maternity leave.
BFP#1: 12/3/13 EDD 8/15/13. Heartbeat found on 12/26/13, HB gone on 1/4/13. D&C 1/7/13
BFP#2: 4/19/13 EDD 12/28/13. Team Green for pregnancy and Baby Girl arrived 12/21/13. BFP#3: 2/9/13 EDD 10/18/17. Team Green for Round 2!
@keiraanne I told them the first time when I was about 14-15 weeks. This time, I had to tell my boss around 8 weeks, because we were scheduling court dates in the fall for some of my cases when I'll be on leave. I think it depends on your job and your relationship with your boss and coworkers.
October 2017 June Siggy Challenge -- "You Had One Job!"
@keiraanne my employer is my parents so as soon as the pee dried haha. but for H's work we told once we felt comfortable which was around 10 weeks. there is no right or wrong, whatever you feel best about. i do think telling sort of takes away from the anxiety of needing to take so much time. this time around we are not telling H's work until like May/June. there is drama going on with his boss. it is better for him to wait until then.
Freaking out over here 12+2 and I think something's moving down there! It's different from hunger pains (a lot in the last few days because can't keep anything down) and it's almost like butterflies but too low. Am I crazy????
@PizzaMonster3 it's likely you're feeling your first flutters! Congrats it's a wonderful feeling to feel the baby finally sometimes people compare it to feeling gas move around but like you mentioned, it's a different feeling! Yay
@PizzaMonster3 this came up in our STM check-in. I'm 12w3d today and I swear I'm feeling it too. A few others thought they've felt something. I think it is very early still though. Most don't feel anything until closer to 20 weeks I think. I felt my first at 17 weeks.
My mom claims she could feel her 2nd moving at 10 weeks, I always thought she was nuts. Now, I'm not so sure.
October 2017 June Siggy Challenge -- "You Had One Job!"
@pizzamonster3, its possible. I'm pretty sure I've felt a few flutters already, to me it feels similar to a gas bubble early on, except you never have gas. I think I was 13 or 14 weeks when I realized that was what I was feeling with my first.
With my first, I felt flutters early. 15 or 16 week, maybe? I can't remember. I only remember telling myself it couldn't be that because it was much too early but when I mentioned it to my doc, she told me that's probably what is was :-)
Freaking out over here 12+2 and I think something's moving down there! It's different from hunger pains (a lot in the last few days because can't keep anything down) and it's almost like butterflies but too low. Am I crazy????
Did you pass that gas yet?
TTC x 1.5 years.
Acupuncture, Femera x3 cyles, and HSG. BFP in September 2014, DS born June 2015. TTC x2 months. BFP January 2017.
Lol @ForwardnBackward I never did. But the feeling was too sustained to be the "flutter" everyone talks about so I think it's some sort of new RLP or dehydration cramps. Idkkkkk
@PizzaMonster3 I felt flutters the other day as well. This is Mr 2nd baby so I knew what it felt like at the beginning. I thought I felt it around 10 weeks, but I had doubts. Now I'm 12 weeks and I know that's definitely what I'm feeling. It feels like someone is blowing bubbles in my stomach. I don't get any bubbly feelings when I'm gassy unless it's accompanied by pain from being there too long. I wasn't in pain and it lasted for about 30 minutes. Then returned at night.
Re: Ask a STM+ (aka the Stupid Questions Thread)
Oct. '17 June S.C. "You Had 1 Job"
I mean, here's the thing. Keep expectations realistic. I went into my first year of marriage expecting the worst year of my life (because that's what everyone kept telling me! Such changes! Living together! It's going to be so hard!). It was tough. But nowhere near the worst year of my life. There will be good days and bad days, awesome days and rock-bottom days. But that's what you signed up for with marriage. The best bud to go through all those cycles with.
BFP#3: 2/9/13 EDD 10/18/17. Team Green for Round 2!
I have factor 5 and it made a huge difference in my first pregnancy. For starters I had to inject myself with lovenox from day one of a positive pregnancy test. I continued to inject for 12 weeks after birth too. I also had to see a perinatologist because of it from 12 weeks on. I had to be monitored more closely because it made me much more likely to have preeclampsia. By the last couple of months I had to go to the doctor twice a week.
This pregnancy is the same. I'm already seeing a perinatologist because of factor 5 and of course I'd need to see one anyway because of having twins. And I'm doing the daily injections again. @feeislove
Married 9/27/2014
TTC Since 1/1/2017
BFP: 2/6/2017
Due Date: 10/13/17
Thoughts, suggestions, feedback all very appreciated
I heart YNAB
---------
“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times,
if one only remembers to turn on the light."
- Albus Dumbledore
https://www.amazon.com/Lansinoh-Soothies-Breastfeeding-Mothers-Count/dp/B002KGHUL4/ref=sr_1_3_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1490103055&sr=8-3&keywords=breast+gel+pads&th=1
May Siggy Challenge: Parenting Fails
May Siggy Challenge: Parenting Fails
The test isn't fool proof, but my doc said it is useful to bring up potential issues so at a later appointment we can explore that further.
3 failed IUI cycles
Oct '15 - IVF 1 - 10R, 3M, 0F
Sept '16 - IVF - 12R, 11M, 5F and 3 perfect day 5 blasts - MMC 7w5d
Jan '17 - FET 1 - BFP, EDD 10/14
I heart YNAB
---------
“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times,
if one only remembers to turn on the light."
- Albus Dumbledore
*O17 June Siggy Challenge - You had 1 job!*
**June Siggy Challenge: You Had ONE Job!**
LO#2 EDD October 18th
BFP in September 2014, DS born June 2015.
TTC x2 months.
BFP January 2017.
BFP in September 2014, DS born June 2015.
TTC x2 months.
BFP January 2017.
**June Siggy Challenge: You Had ONE Job!**
LO#2 EDD October 18th
I heart YNAB
---------
“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times,
if one only remembers to turn on the light."
- Albus Dumbledore
This pregnancy I also told my boss pretty early for the same reason - puking a lot and my brain seems to be a bowl of jelly for the first few weeks. I have a lot more responsibilities in this new position and I knew he'd notice if things fell through the cracks. We're waiting to tell my direct reports until I'm at the 12 week mark, although I'm pretty sure they suspect something at this point. I also wanted to start the conversation of how my maternity leave would go because I'm asking for a rather unconventional maternity leave.
BFP#3: 2/9/13 EDD 10/18/17. Team Green for Round 2!
May Siggy Challenge: Parenting Fails
12+2 and I think something's moving down there! It's different from hunger pains (a lot in the last few days because can't keep anything down) and it's almost like butterflies but too low.
Am I crazy????
My mom claims she could feel her 2nd moving at 10 weeks, I always thought she was nuts. Now, I'm not so sure.
BFP in September 2014, DS born June 2015.
TTC x2 months.
BFP January 2017.