Thanks for your responses @kitkat8387 and @constancegoodspeed , thats super helpful and I will follow up at my 36 week appt this week to see if our hospital has a similar protocol for such situations.
While I understand baby size does not always correlate to tearing, and that a lot can be done to prevent tearing, my question was primarily about what happens in regards to pain management if you find yourself in that situation.
I definitely agree with you, @Cafedisco, it could be a real fear that could almost create the issue itself. Part of my preparation is to figure out all my options even for some of the "what if" scenarios because that helps me relax about it overall. I've been reading the Bradley Method and Ina May's Childbirth as well as taking L&D classes through a local doula group and prenatal yoga classes that focus a lot on pain management techniques for labor, but I am not yet decided about the epidural.
@pinkshades05 I am definitely interested in laboring in a tub if I have the opportunity, but our hospital only has one available on a first come first serve basis, so I can't count on it being available which is sad. Fingers crossed though!!
@lovelongdog06 I like your advice about low and deep, that will be something helpful to keep in mind! I've also heard the one about the cervix mimicking the facial expression, so if you scrunch up and have tension in your face, so will your cervix.
Wow! You ladies make it sound like I had it easy. "Pooping a bowling ball" is quite accurate and I had the epidural.
@lovelongdog06 Did you deliver breech? How does the story end? I had never heard of peanut ball until this thread popped up and I'm definitely interested.
@jennielynn+ unfortunately no. We transferred because my midwife wasn't sure if he was breech or face first and didn't want to hurt him trying to fix his position. The doctor came in with the ultrasound about 5 minutes after I was given the peanut ball and it was clear in about 2 seconds he was breech. At that point I really had no choice but to consent to a cesarean. I was complete and pushing on arrival, so I didn't use the peanut ball for progression, but I'm a bit of a birth junky and hang out in a lot of vbac groups.
@jennielynn+@lovelongdog06 at our labor and delivery class this past weekend the L&D nurse mentioned they use the peanut ball for all epidural patients at our hospital to help with progressing and opening the pelvis once you are stuck in bed, just like you mentioned @lovelongdog06. I thought it was interesting as I had never heard of the peanut ball for labor before. We used them all the time for core stabilization in my classroom for kids with autism but that was the only place I ever saw them before.
I didn't want narcotics but the nurse just pumped them in without asking. The only thing I didn't like about the whole experience. And "best" part is: The narcotics did NOTHING for the pain. There was literally no difference at all. I had the epidural after that and was able to take a nap and finally progress. And it's true you feel nothing. I did have to let it ease up a bit because I was too numb at first. After that it was completely painless.
Bodies typically don't make babies larger than they can birth.
Hmmmmmm... *raises hand* Mine does.
That's why I said 'typically' and the next sentence of my post said 'of course there are some exceptions.'
Whoa. Sorry. Understood. My labor class didn't even discuss a 4th degree tear (they literally said "this won't happen to any of you") and therefore I had no idea what was happening to me or what it meant. Most women don't tear or tear very minimally. But it does happen and I wish I had been apart of more dialogues prior to my first born about all possibilities.
@kcasset I'm with you. At our birth class, they did not mention tearing in any detail. They said you may be stitched with a local anth. but, not much else. I think it is a way to not freak people out when they are already feeling overloaded with information in those sessions. I'm so glad I made a pp spray beforehand. Also Tucks. I had no idea what to expect.
I bought the tucks and bought the earth mama bottom spray. Hoping to make the padcicles too! Glad to hear you liked those things postpartum. My doctor told me all the things they will do to try to help prevent tearing today, so that made me feel a little better.
Yeah, I think most people I know have torn at least a little. I mean, there isn't really a huge need to talk about it at length in my opinion. What are they supposed to say about it in detail? You might tear and then they stitch you up. I'm honestly curious about what else they could say about it. As a doula I don't really focus much time on it with my clients. Should I be talking about it more?
Me: 28 year old SAHM/Birth Doula DH: 30 year old pneumatic electrical engineer
Married: October 8, 2011
DD1: September 24, 2013 BFP: June 25, 2016 and MC: July 3, 2016 DD2: April 16, 2017 BFP: November 30, 2018 EDD: August 14, 2019
I think it's important to be informed about what is likely to increase tearing, what you can do to decrease the risks or tearing, and what's done if you find yourself in the situation of having a tear (for me this part was a pain management question). Maybe that's just me, but the more information I have the less anxiety I am likely to have because I know what to expect. Other people might feel the opposite way though and that could cause them more worry to think about "what ifs"
It's funny you bring up the "what ifs" because I feel like I'm at the point now where I'm ready for them. A few weeks ago I did not want to think at all about labor and postpartum messiness, but today I was googling "how long will I bleed postpartum?," for example. I'm also going to be making padsicles tomorrow, so there's really no hiding from that stuff now...
DD #1: April 2017 DD #2: May 2020 Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
I feel like most in depth birthing classes that are several sessions discuss tearing. We're the classes you guys took that didn't a few hours or an ongoing class that met several times? If it was just a few hours, there is just way too much to discuss to focus a bunch of time on tearing.
A number of people mentioned not being able to sit still during an epidural. I was 8cm dilated with DS when I got my epidural (arrived 8cm dilated). The nurse is really helpful with the whole process. When I felt a contraction coming on they would pause and then between they inserted it. It worked well for me. I've had friends who have only had it partially take, though.
A number of people mentioned not being able to sit still during an epidural. I was 8cm dilated with DS when I got my epidural (arrived 8cm dilated). The nurse is really helpful with the whole process. When I felt a contraction coming on they would pause and then between they inserted it. It worked well for me. I've had friends who have only had it partially take, though.
Re: Pain management during labor
While I understand baby size does not always correlate to tearing, and that a lot can be done to prevent tearing, my question was primarily about what happens in regards to pain management if you find yourself in that situation.
I definitely agree with you, @Cafedisco, it could be a real fear that could almost create the issue itself. Part of my preparation is to figure out all my options even for some of the "what if" scenarios because that helps me relax about it overall. I've been reading the Bradley Method and Ina May's Childbirth as well as taking L&D classes through a local doula group and prenatal yoga classes that focus a lot on pain management techniques for labor, but I am not yet decided about the epidural.
@pinkshades05 I am definitely interested in laboring in a tub if I have the opportunity, but our hospital only has one available on a first come first serve basis, so I can't count on it being available which is sad. Fingers crossed though!!
@lovelongdog06 I like your advice about low and deep, that will be something helpful to keep in mind! I've also heard the one about the cervix mimicking the facial expression, so if you scrunch up and have tension in your face, so will your cervix.
@lovelongdog06 Did you deliver breech? How does the story end? I had never heard of peanut ball until this thread popped up and I'm definitely interested.
DD1 born 5/24/10.
Missed M/C at 14 wks Feb 2012.
DD2 born 5/14/13.
Missed M/C at 9 wks July 2015.
For the FTMs:
https://www.target.com/p/tucks-medicated-cooling-pads-100-count/-/A-14013778
These made me feel so human pp on my tinder bits. I have heard they are great for hemorrhoids and c-section ouchies too!
PP padcicles and spray you can make at the same time.
https://www.modernalternativemama.com/2014/04/18/making-postpartum-padsicles-plus-bonus-perineum-healing-spray/
DD1 born 5/24/10.
Missed M/C at 14 wks Feb 2012.
DD2 born 5/14/13.
Missed M/C at 9 wks July 2015.
DH: 30 year old pneumatic electrical engineer
BFP: June 25, 2016 and MC: July 3, 2016
DD2: April 16, 2017
BFP: November 30, 2018 EDD: August 14, 2019
DD #2: May 2020
Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
DD1 born 5/24/10.
Missed M/C at 14 wks Feb 2012.
DD2 born 5/14/13.
Missed M/C at 9 wks July 2015.
DD: 6/20/11
DS: 2/23/13
EDD: 4/15/17
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17