Car ride screaming!!! — The Bump
April 2016 Moms

Car ride screaming!!!

We took a 2.5 hour road trip to a friend's ranch this weekend. And I'm not kidding when I say baby screamed 99% of the time. I finally crawled in the back and leaned over the car seat to give him the boob!! (I fed him right before we left and yes I made sure I wasn't smothering him lol) it was horrible. He did the same thing on the way back too. Then yesterday we had to go out to my father in laws to get his truck unstuck (snowpocolypse in idaho) and baby screamed the way back too. It was worse when he was in his baby car seat, so we got him the bigger stationary one... he was still pissed if we drove more than 30 mins. So we turned him facing forward for our road trip.. still screamed. I'm at a loss. We've tried the opening a new toy and watching videos on my phone. They only last so long.  Both of our girls still fall asleep on road trips. I seriously need help here, we take multiple road trips and have a big one coming up here soon!

Re: Car ride screaming!!!

  • this is definitely a tough one. We did a long road trip for Christmas (would normally have taken about 12 hours) and I found that leaving right around his nap time helped so he fell asleep from the start. Then there was a lot of feeding in the car...mostly little things like puffs that would take him a while. Then there was lots of stopping to let him get out and move around a bit. We were planning on stopping for the night somewhere on the way, but realized we should just finish it out late at night because he had more or less fallen asleep for the night.

    I remember when I was little we always started road trips late at night and my parents drove through the night so we'd all be sleeping. Maybe that's an option?
    redseliglinzoirv
  • We had a four hour trip about a month ago. We left right before his last nap of the day. When he woke up he was pretty fussy but we stopped so he could move around a bit and get his diaper changed. He was less fussy when we removed some of his clothing, could he be uncomfortable with the temperature in the car? 
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  • We had the same thing happen for Thanksgiving. Our solution was to tell my in-laws that they could drive down and visit us for Christmas because there was no freaking way we were going to listen to dd scream for 5 solid hours out of the day. She does tend to do better if we travel right away in the morning after she wakes up, but still does okay if it's light outside. If it's dark out, as best as I can tell she thinks that we are trying to make her take a nap so she screams to let us know that she isn't tired? She also prefers side streets and highways over interstates. The noise is pretty bad in the back of our car on the interstate so I'm thinking that has quite a bit to do with it as well. Basically we stay home and make people come see us now and it's been working, but if you find a solution in which you can actually go somewhere without screaming, please share your secrets with me! 
  • We had the same thing happen for Thanksgiving. Our solution was to tell my in-laws that they could drive down and visit us for Christmas because there was no freaking way we were going to listen to dd scream for 5 solid hours out of the day. She does tend to do better if we travel right away in the morning after she wakes up, but still does okay if it's light outside. If it's dark out, as best as I can tell she thinks that we are trying to make her take a nap so she screams to let us know that she isn't tired? She also prefers side streets and highways over interstates. The noise is pretty bad in the back of our car on the interstate so I'm thinking that has quite a bit to do with it as well. Basically we stay home and make people come see us now and it's been working, but if you find a solution in which you can actually go somewhere without screaming, please share your secrets with me! 
    I definitely will! Our next trip is 8 hours up to Portland! We always stop Multnomah falls. I will definitely plan on making a few stops to let him move around. I also didn't think about the clothing aspect! Maybe I'll just throw him in a onesie and whenever we get out put him in his winter suit real quick. BTW we got his winter suit from target! It's Columbia and totally amazing, it's a full fleece suit with a good and it has extra cloth to fold over the hands and feet if you choose to.
  • edited January 2017
    My son used to do this, and one day just decided he was over it and stopped. To cope I gave him a mirror that he can look at himself, a few toys that hang from the seat in front of him, and a little moving baby aquarium that's made for cribs. It comes with a remote that he can turn on and off with a giant button.
  • DD1 screamed from the moment we put her in the car as an infant. She didn't like being restrained. And, as she got older, we discovered that she gets carsick quickly-15 min is her limit. We know to take a garbage bag now and have tried Dramamine, which helps. She also has sensory processing disorder, so the car ride was overstimulating her. She's now 6 and we still don't take many trips because of her.
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  • My DD screams in her car seat everywhere we go and has since around 6 weeks old. I thought for sure she would have outgrown it by now, but nope. It makes for miserable car line trips dropping/picking up DD1 from school.

    We moved her out of the infant seat months ago hoping it would help, but it didn't. I'm at my wits end with it. She has toys, snacks, and big sisters to play with her, but she still cries. I'm so tired of it, I'm considering turning her forward facing to see if that helps. 

    So all that said, I'm no help but I feel your pain. Lol

    Anyone else turned their's FF already? Or am I a terrible mom for considering this?
  • My DD screams in her car seat everywhere we go and has since around 6 weeks old. I thought for sure she would have outgrown it by now, but nope. It makes for miserable car line trips dropping/picking up DD1 from school.

    We moved her out of the infant seat months ago hoping it would help, but it didn't. I'm at my wits end with it. She has toys, snacks, and big sisters to play with her, but she still cries. I'm so tired of it, I'm considering turning her forward facing to see if that helps. 

    So all that said, I'm no help but I feel your pain. Lol

    Anyone else turned their's FF already? Or am I a terrible mom for considering this?
    I turned mine facing forward when we got our big boy seat. He's a taller guy and his legs seemed like they didn't have a ton of room in the rear facing setup, so I swapped it. No biggie. 
  • My DD screams in her car seat everywhere we go and has since around 6 weeks old. I thought for sure she would have outgrown it by now, but nope. It makes for miserable car line trips dropping/picking up DD1 from school.

    We moved her out of the infant seat months ago hoping it would help, but it didn't. I'm at my wits end with it. She has toys, snacks, and big sisters to play with her, but she still cries. I'm so tired of it, I'm considering turning her forward facing to see if that helps. 

    So all that said, I'm no help but I feel your pain. Lol

    Anyone else turned their's FF already? Or am I a terrible mom for considering this?
    I highly recommend not turning to FF yet. There's tons of research showing that they are safest RF until at least 3 years. We turned DD1 just after his 3rd birthday, but only because we had to make room in the car for #4. We plan on keeping DD2 RF well past 3.
    I turned my almost 10 month around. It seems to be helping with the screaming. My boy is taller also. And there is research that backs both ways..... so really it comes down to what you're comfortable with. The biggest thing is making sure your baby isn't in the middle. My sister in law and both of her sisters are pediatric nurses. When I asked her about turning him around she told me to research both and make my own decision. But she made it clear that baby's should always be behind a driver or passenger seat, never in the middle. And that is based off accidents she has seen, not something read on the Internet. 

    I will say that since turning bub around, I'm not pulling my hair out and he is no longer screaming. So it's a win win lol! 

    Also! All you mommy's should check out the app toddle, that has been great also!
  • My DD screams in her car seat everywhere we go and has since around 6 weeks old. I thought for sure she would have outgrown it by now, but nope. It makes for miserable car line trips dropping/picking up DD1 from school.

    We moved her out of the infant seat months ago hoping it would help, but it didn't. I'm at my wits end with it. She has toys, snacks, and big sisters to play with her, but she still cries. I'm so tired of it, I'm considering turning her forward facing to see if that helps. 

    So all that said, I'm no help but I feel your pain. Lol

    Anyone else turned their's FF already? Or am I a terrible mom for considering this?
    I highly recommend not turning to FF yet. There's tons of research showing that they are safest RF until at least 3 years. We turned DD1 just after his 3rd birthday, but only because we had to make room in the car for #4. We plan on keeping DD2 RF well past 3.
    I turned my almost 10 month around. It seems to be helping with the screaming. My boy is taller also. And there is research that backs both ways..... so really it comes down to what you're comfortable with. The biggest thing is making sure your baby isn't in the middle. My sister in law and both of her sisters are pediatric nurses. When I asked her about turning him around she told me to research both and make my own decision. But she made it clear that baby's should always be behind a driver or passenger seat, never in the middle. And that is based off accidents she has seen, not something read on the Internet. 

    I will say that since turning bub around, I'm not pulling my hair out and he is no longer screaming. So it's a win win lol! 

    Also! All you mommy's should check out the app toddle, that has been great also!
    I'll stick with what our pediatrician recommends and what the laws are where we live (RF until age 2).
    Our pediatrician says RF until 2 and as long as you can after that! We plan to do extended RF, so we purchased our convertible seat with that in mind. 
    momofmanyinthemittenivyvines6Xath
  • edited January 2017
    My seat said forward facing for 20 pounds and up, so that's what I went by - there's also no laws about it here.

    I researched to be sure this wasn't totally insane and determined it was something I was OK with, but I understand that longer is generally recommended. Not running around telling everybody to swap their seats immediately, just saying we did it and all is well.
  • This is interesting because many European countries are taking a cue from Sweden and are having their kids rear facing up until age four. 

    https://www.carseat.se/the-swedish-rear-facing-car-seat-approach/
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    ivyvines6ladylolly89Xath
  • Pretty sure most US states have a law of at least one year old!
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  • @Missingchampagne They are actually quite comfortable with their legs touching the seat. My three year old, who is VERY tall (in the 90th percentiles consistently since about 2 months old), was comfortably rear facing until just before my A16 baby was born (she was about 2 years and 3 months old at that point). My A16 baby just got a convertible carseat and she's been exceeding my 3 year old's height stats at each month and she's perfectly comfy rear facing and will be RFing until the bare minimum of 2 years. I know you're in Florida like I am and I just checked, we're unfortunately behind in passing the law for a minimum of age 2 until FF the seats, but check out this website: https://csftl.org/rear-facing-car-seat-myths-busted/, #2 specifically addresses the leg seat. Just trying to make sure your little man is safest as possible! :smile:

    Just as someone stated before, they don't even know RFing is an option, so don't let them know! :wink:
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    ivyvines6Xath
  • Worth noting, the 20lbs guideline for forward facing refers to the bare minimum weight a child must be before you forward face (assuming they meet all other requirements). As in, if your child is 2 years old but not yet 20 pounds, you need to keep them rearfacing. It is NOT a recommendation to forward face once you hit 20lbs; quite the opposite. That's why seats have rear-facing maximums (which can range anywhere from 35 to 50 lbs). 

    Just because they look uncomfortable with their legs touching the seat (because we would be) doesn't mean that they are uncomfortable, and it's okay if they have to cross their legs or drape them over the side. Babies and small children are a lot more flexible than we are. I'd be super uncomfortable with my feet in my mouth, but that doesn't phase my daughter.


    ivyvines6AEG84ladylolly89Xath
  • edited January 2017
    So there you have it OP! To answer your question, the Facebook group is here to tell you DEFINITELY YOU MUST RF!

    To reiterate, it's not illegal where I live. For me... it was a personal decision. My baby is in my car less than a half hour every week, if that. I work from home and he is with me. You do you.
  • So there you have it OP! To answer your question, the Facebook group is here to tell you DEFINITELY YOU MUST RF!

    To reiterate, it's not illegal where I live. For me... it was a personal decision. My baby is in my car less than a half hour every week, if that. I work from home and he is with me. You do you.
    I know it's a personal decision but you really should look into some recent studies on RF vs FF for infants especially. The amount of time you spend in a car doesn't negate the likelihood of an accident occurring, nor does it change the possibility of your child becoming injured or dying. By all means, you do you, but check this out before you just consider me a bully lurking from the shadows of the FB group.. 
    AEG84RoseShadow873Xathyodiggity
  • A month ago my sister in law treated a 5 month old baby who was rear facing in the middle seat. She had severe head lacerations  due to being rear ended, the glass broke and smashed all over the baby..... there are pros and cons to any way you face a baby. To sit here and bash on a moms decision is childish. I choose to have my baby facing forward and behind my passenger seat because that is where I feel comfortable having him. No it is not illegal and the manufacturers say to forward face at 20lbs. I waited until he was 26lbs.
  • brenlo42 said:
    Manufacturers say you CAN forward face at 20 lbs, but research says that it is safer to keep kiddos rear-facing. As I said before, I have not seen any studies which support early forward-facing.

    I honestly don't think this is the kind of thing that should be written off easily as a "personal decision." If you choose to do it, that is your prerogative, but know that you are willfully making every car ride riskier for your baby.  I don't understand why anyone would make a change that they know makes their child less safe.

    You base your opinion off what you read on the internet. I base mine on what I've seen and talked to actual doctors about. To each there own though. I'm sure you feel you are right and that's ok. Because I feel I am right. It's unfortunate that you feel like being arrogant is the way to go about things though. Maybe someone should strap you in the back of a vehicle with your legs cramped up for an hour or two. 
  • @Cwyatt2571 I definitely agree with you that @brenlo42's chosen method of delivery - reverting to insults and mommy-shaming (I'm referring to the quote "irresponsible and borderline negligent") was unnecessary. I don't think we're going to get anywhere here though ;) 
  • brenlo42 said:
    Manufacturers say you CAN forward face at 20 lbs, but research says that it is safer to keep kiddos rear-facing. As I said before, I have not seen any studies which support early forward-facing.

    I honestly don't think this is the kind of thing that should be written off easily as a "personal decision." If you choose to do it, that is your prerogative, but know that you are willfully making every car ride riskier for your baby.  I don't understand why anyone would make a change that they know makes their child less safe.

    You base your opinion off what you read on the internet. I base mine on what I've seen and talked to actual doctors about. To each there own though. I'm sure you feel you are right and that's ok. Because I feel I am right. It's unfortunate that you feel like being arrogant is the way to go about things though. Maybe someone should strap you in the back of a vehicle with your legs cramped up for an hour or two. 
    Maybe someone should show you what it's like to be in a car accident forward-facing before your spine is strong enough to withstand the impact. Your argument is ridiculous. I'd much rather my baby have some lacerations from glass than be internally decapitated or dead. 

    https://www.parenting.com/blogs/show-and-tell/kate-parentingcom/rear-facing-car-seat-safety
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    ladylolly89ivyvines6
  • @Cwyatt2571 I definitely agree with you that @brenlo42's chosen method of delivery - reverting to insults and mommy-shaming (I'm referring to the quote "irresponsible and borderline negligent") was unnecessary. I don't think we're going to get anywhere here though ;) 
    It's not mommy shaming or an insult when a child is ACTUALLY being placed in danger by someone's actions. We are pointing this out because we want your child to be safe. I would do the same thing if I saw your baby sleeping on a bed with blankets and pillows at this age.
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    AK118brie_and_almonds
  • Gettin' out my translator here for the folks in the peanut gallery.

    "What you read off the internet" = Actual peer-reviewed research, as well as recommendations by the American Acadamy of Pediatrics, car seat manufacturers' crash tests, and recommendations by the National Transportation Safety Board.

    "What I've seen and talked to actual doctors about" = anecdotes from my sister-in-law, unsupported by actual science, and without consideration for how much worse it could have been.

    Everyone is entitled to their own opinions. No one is entitled to their own facts. If you are forward facing your infant, the fact of the matter is that you are making a dangerous decision that could very well end in the easily preventable death of your own child.  Personally, I like my kid and I want to keep her safe so I listen to the experts and rear face.  But hey, if you're willing to take the chance so that you won't have to listen to your kid cry during car rides, you do you.


    brie_and_almondsyodiggityivyvines6
  • I feel like these things have already been said, the facts have already been stated, and now they're just being stated in an increasingly hostile tone. That's why I said I did not agree with the insults. Now it's just at that point in a thread where everybody is just repeating the same thing, but more aggressively than the next IMO.
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