So excited its another month in the books for 2017! On the sad side, my husband reminded me he has a business trip in two weeks. It is for the entire work week. I have never been solo with my daughter this long. He normally gets home at 5pm so, I have help/break until 9:20pm when she goes to bed. This will be 20hours of help I am missing that week!
DH has been laid off for 2 weeks now (this is the start of week 3). He was talking to his BIL this week and it sounds like they might have an opportunity at his job open. His BIL is going to talk with the powers that be and try to get him a position. It pays more (YAY!!) but the hours are a bit more hectic. DH previously had a pretty stable M-F job (although sometimes the OT would be CRAZY). But with this job there is a possibility of working overnights and/or short shifts on the weekend. DH asked me if I would be ok with him working crazy hours. Did he forget who I am? HAHA!
DH's bday is tomorrow and I ordered him a "mancrate" more than a month ago. The theme of it is '1st time dad.' It consists of a manly diaper bag (ha!), some energy foods and drinks, a baby guide, and some other fun stuff. He doesn't mind not getting the showers or the attention, but I still wanted to give him a little something.
Also, while I love the guy, I am looking forward to a Saturday night BY MYSELF! He's driving down to his parents to go to a hockey game and I am going to order take-out, watch movies, and have myself a pants-off, dance-off... jam out with my clam out.... and then crash by 7:30pm. BLISS!!
TTC Numero uno since 01/13 Me 31, DH 32, Married 08/08 02/13/15-HSG-All Clear
07/25/15-50mg Clomid CD3-7+IUI #1 cd14-3 Follicles; SA 21Mill- BFN
08/19/15-25mg Clomid CD3-7+IUI #2 cd15-just ovulated, SA 42Mill- BFN
09/10/15-25mg Clomid CD3-7+IUI #3 cd14-2 Follicles; SA 45Mill- BFN
Hello everyone! I won't blame you if you have written me off by now It was not my intention to be off the grid for so long. I've had a few scares with this pregnancy, one brief hospitalization, some concerns with my 5 year old that are on going, extremely high stress level at work etc. We also had a robbery at the office as well as a huge system fall out with servers down and some of the sites (including The Bump) were blocked. It's still touch and go and I often get kicked out of the site but today it looks like I can actually post something. I hope everyone is doing well. Can't believe some of us are in the single digits for how many weeks we have left. Time sure did fly by. Again, sorry for not being an active member as I had planned.
Also, while I love the guy, I am looking forward to a Saturday night BY MYSELF! He's driving down to his parents to go to a hockey game and I am going to order take-out, watch movies, and have myself a pants-off, dance-off... jam out with my clam out.... and then crash by 7:30pm. BLISS!!
OMG!!! I'm dying over here!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
@MrsBakes Sounds like you have had a ROUGH few months! Hopefully things begin to settle/calm down a bit so that you can catch your breath before baby gets here! Welcome back, hopefully you can stay!
Saturday my daughter refused to go to a birthday party she was super excited about beforehand.. Yesterday she threw a fit she didn't want to leave the house.. Today she threw a fit BC she didn't want to go to preschool (normally she loves going) got halfway to her school and get a call to get my nephew bc my brother had to bring my niece to the ER.. bribed her to hurry her up ( I was desperate to get her in and settled so I could go get my nephew) I feel like I'm about to lose my mind with my daughter's sudden personality switch. She's normally super outgoing, always wants to be on the go and easy.. and I'm soooo tired and now dealing with two kiddos as DH is at work and I want my brother to be able to focus on my niece (she's blind and non verbal so it's not an easy task anyway- let alone while she's sick)
Is anyone thinking of doing a 3D/4d ultrasound? I'm mostly just interested in seeing LOs cute face/making sure all is well, but I know it isn't medically necessary. Curious as to if anyone is doing an elective ultrasound now that we are mostly all in 3rd tri.
@wagnerw my OB will order an ultrasound for me at 35 weeks, and I'm guessing they'll do a 3-d since they did them for my 12 and 18 week. I wouldn't think there's anything wrong with doing an elective one if your OB doesn't call for one.
DD #1: April 2017 DD #2: May 2020 Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
@wagnerw I just had mine today and loved it! It was super fun to see her and I would recommend it. I figured I only get to be a FTM once, so why not spoil myself and do some of the extra things I want to do.
@wagnerw My OB always warns against going to the boutique places because most of those techs aren't trained to do any medical analysis, so if you see something that looks weird, they won't necessarily be able to put your mind at ease (if that makes sense) - they're not necessarily going to be able to tell you that all is well (and around here, they're not allowed to give you any medical advice anyway). It is good for seeing the cute face though!
Personally, the 3D/4D stuff creeps me out, so I'm going to pass, haha.
@wagnerw I would sort of agree with @SnarkasaurusRex in that if you want to do it just to see her, go for it, but if you want to do it to make sure all is well, perhaps better not do it without a really trained professional. At the end of the day we (as internet strangers) don't know what kind of anxiety you might get if you see something that looks 'weird,' but at this point there's not much you likely could or would do anyway...
DD #1: April 2017 DD #2: May 2020 Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
@catem07@Taylor72@SnarkasaurusRex Thanks ladies! Ha, if I had been thinking I would have realized that the boutique place wouldn't be doing any medical diagnosis, but more of a peace of mind/see the cute face ultrasound. DH and I decided to book a 3d/4d for this weekend as an early V-Day gift to each other.
Well all who might be wondering, DH went in for tests today and he has mono. The doctor thinks he's got another ten days of it or so. But the virus can be present for weeks or even longer in his body. And it can be there for 4-6 weeks before symptoms show. Which means I could have it and not know it. So now I'm stressed out about whether or not I'm going to be able to sleep next to and kiss my husband for the rest of the pregnancy, and whether baby will be at risk after she's born! I know it's not as contagious as some things, but definitely no kissing. Ugh. I just really miss him. And I'm hoping he's better by the time our childbirth class comes around. Why did he have to get the one thing that poses a risk for weeks after?
Anyone have any advice or experience with having mono or being exposed to it while pregnant?
@HGRich so sorry to hear that your DH has mono ☹️ I don't have any advice to offer as I've never had it or known anyone who did, but I'll be thinking of you both and hopefully he feels better soon.
@HGRich can you be tested for mono in your system although you may not be showing signs of it? It may clear up some stress if you know that you for sure have not caught it. Also, I'm so sorry that you are having to stay away from your hubs for so long! I know that's got to be hard to go without love and affection for so long.
@HGRich I'm sorry you're dealing with such a stressful situation. Fingers crossed that you're in the clear and everything is good and stress-free in time for your daughters arrival!
Thank you all for your kind words. I'm a little wigged out about a few things in my life and this just upset my pregnant self more. I need to calm down and take it one day at a time. @KirstinH88 that's a good idea--I will ask my doctor about that.
I'm feeling a little bummed. Our baby shower is this Saturday and only a few things have been bought from the 2 registries . The shower is family style honoring both DH and I there should be around 70 guests. People have known about it since late October and invites went out in December. I helped planned the majority of the shower including lots of DIYs. I hope they get appreciated.
I think my disappointment comes from people doing things last minute and not thinking ahead for such an important event. I'm an organized type of person and I know people do things differently.
I put a lot of time and research into the things on the registry and I'm afraid people are going to bring random gifts or nothing at all. I'm grateful that I get to see all my family to celebrate our first child and gifts should come second, but I still feel a little disappointed.
@dax28 I don't blame you! With that many people you'd think some of them would have purchased from your registry! Hoping it's just that they didn't know how to mark it off the registry and you get some of what you put time and effort into. But I guess if not, I hope they get you equivalent things you like just as much, and that the shower is a fun time anyway.
@Dax28 hopefully the items just didn't get marked off as @HGrich said. This happened at my shower for DS and I ended up with a few duplicates. I also ended up getting a lot of clothes and blankets that I didn't register for. I think a lot of people just kind of decided to do their own thing. I know that it's hard when there is so much that you need. Good luck and I hope it goes well!
@Dax28, sounds like you put tons of effort into your shower. I know your guests will appreciate it. My shower is in two weeks and similar to yours (family style) and I have had some purchases off the registry but not tons yet. I hope that people follow it as I got a lot of hand me downs from my sisters and definetly don't need more clothes and blankets but I guess it'll be what it'll be. It'll work out in the end.
MMC @ 10w March 2016 Cautiously expecting April 5, 2017
@Dax28 Step 1 is to stop looking at your registry. Realistically, your registry is just a list of your wants...it's not a list of demands for your guests. They can choose how to spend their money however they like, and that means that people will go off registry. As a FTM, some of the best gifts that I got were things that I hadn't thought to register for. Personally, my go-to gift is an "oh sh!t" bag to go in the car that has spare diapers, wipes, onesies, and blankets in case of inconvenient blowout or a forgotten diaper bag. Also, as PP mentioned, a lot of people will opt to get you clothes and blankets, which are typically not on the registry.
Step 2 is to realize that while this is a big event for YOU, and you sent the invitations out months in advance, that doesn't mean it is a huge pressing concern for other people to get you a gift in advance. A lot of people shop the week or day of the shower because that's when it becomes relevant for their lives and they get down to the task of getting a gift. My best friend had her shower a few weeks ago, when I checked her registry to get a sense of what style of stuff she wanted to plan my gift, there was virtually nothing purchased off of it. By the time her shower rolled around a few days later, she received tons of the things that were on her registry. So, I wouldn't view that as a source of disappointment...other people have their own lives going on.
Step 3 is to accept that you're not going to get everything off of your registry. You're going to get things that you didn't register for, and you might not like some of those things and you'll decide to return them. The bottom line is that people spent time and money selecting a gift for you, so you should be gracious and thankful that they did. A lot of people don't have the network to have 70 people get them gifts. If there are still things that you need after your shower, that's on you and your DH to get them - other people are under no obligation to finance your baby.
Step 4 is to relax and enjoy your shower this weekend.
((If this comes off as snarky, I didn't intend it to; I can't help it...it's in my username, after all! I just really care about baby shower etiquette.))
@HGRich sorry your DH has mono, hope he feels better soon! I had it in college, it really only knocked me on my ass the first 2w but after that I could function more and was able to go back to classes. Hopefully it passes quickly for him!
@SnarkasaurusRex I don't think it was snarky. I agree with you, people will ALWAYS buy things not on your registry. The only thing I got from DS's baby shower was the carseat I wanted...and thats it. The same thing happened when we got married as well, which was expected tbh. Keep in mind they may buy the items somewhere else for a better deal so you may get some of the things anyway and not know it. We used our registry as a check-list/wish list so if there were things I didn't get from the shower that I still wanted, I just went and got it myself or saved for later down the road. @Dax28 Just enjoy it and relax, I'm sure the shower will be great!
@HGRich Sorry to hear about your husband. I had mono in high school, and it really knocks you on your ass. Hopefully he'll start to feel better soon! To slightly assuage your worries about catching it, in all honesty, there is a very good chance you've already had it and just don't know it. Lots of people actually get it when they're children, and it's similar to chicken pox (I think the viruses are part of the same family? Or fairly similar, at least) in that when you're young, the illness milder than if you get it when older. So, it generally just seems like a case of the flu or cold when you're a child. I think I saw a stat that said around 90% of people over 35 have been infected at one point or another...Anyways, try not to worry too much!
@Dax28 , I'm a HUGE planner, too, and I understand that feeling of wanting people to appreciate the time and energy you've spent in researching the items you need for baby. Try not to stress about it, though. Most people are on the go so much these days, it's not their intention to make you feel unimportant (just going off my feelings from the past, so forgive me if you don't feel that way), but they will pull through. Most of my guests from DS's shower gave me gift cards and items that weren't on the registry, but made sure to include gift receipts in case there were duplicates. There were also gifts we received that were on the registry, but they forgot to mark them off when they bought them. Honest mistakes.
Definitely try not to look at your registry anymore (I know, easier said than done) but you will have an awesome shower and your LO will be blessed with everything it needs!! And woohoo for gift cards!!
I guess I have a random, too. DH and I have been in a lot of thought this past year about his career path. We got news yesterday that his coworker is leaving, which means his entire schedule for the month of February has changed. Thankfully, it's not as bad as it could be, so we are trying to discern if this is an opportunity for him to look at other career options. I hope to stay optimistic and encouraging, but I'm not going to lie, being 7 months pregnant and having to go through this is a little nerve wracking.
@wagnerw We ate at Zombie Burgers last night. AMAZING! Thanks so much for the recommendation. It was perfect for both DH and I last night. He is a zombie lover, so that was fun for him. And that was seriously the best hamburger I have had in quite awhile. It was the perfect low-key relaxed dinner since DH was tired and a little stressed about the interview today.
DH is about halfway through his interview right now. *fingers crossed* We just saw a little bit of downtown Des Moines last night and so far have a great vibe from this city. So nervous to hear back from him after the interview. Really, really enjoying this morning of drinking coffee and watching TV in bed without any children demanding anything from me. Feel a little bad that I am so relaxed and happy and DH has to do the hard stressful stuff today. Just trying to remember that the whole labor and birth thing is a lot more enjoyable for him.
Me: 28 year old SAHM/Birth Doula DH: 30 year old pneumatic electrical engineer
Married: October 8, 2011
DD1: September 24, 2013 BFP: June 25, 2016 and MC: July 3, 2016 DD2: April 16, 2017 BFP: November 30, 2018 EDD: August 14, 2019
@HGRich Glad you have some answers about your DH, but it sucks that the answer was mono. Thinking about you guys.
@Dax28 It is really hard not to, but I would agree with @SnarkasaurusRex not to look at your registry before the shower. People definitely buy things wherever they already have a gift card or can find a cheaper price, so just because it's not marked as purchased doesn't mean they didn't purchase it for you (I had to go update my registries after my shower for this reason). People also wait until the absolute last minute to shop. Also, as a FTM I feel like I'm only guessing at what I will really need (apart from the obvious diapers, etc.) and some of the gifts that really stick out from my shower are from been-there mamas who went off registry.
I will say that after going through gifts from my first shower, we did get some things that we no longer need (either because we got hand-me-downs from SIL or friends, or someone gave us a handmade version of something we registered for, etc.). So save those gift receipts if you have them, and don't feel bad about returning some stuff to get what you actually need. I am finding this to be especially true with bibs - we got a lot of bibs, but at my shower the guests decorated a TON of plain bibs with fabric markers, so I'm going to return some of the ones that were purchased for us. It's mainly little stuff like that.
Just take a deep breath, relax and enjoy your shower mama! It sounds like you've put some hard work into it, so enjoy your day and soak in the love for you and your little one.
@mrsstuessy thinking of your husband! Good luck to him!
@Blueberry85 thank you--I had heard something like that and I'm hoping it's true. My brother had it in high school and I wonder if I got it at some point and didn't know. I'm trying to be optimistic.
@mrsstuessy so glad you liked it! Now I'm craving zombie burger! Sending positives vibes for a great interview! And enjoy your relaxing morning, you deserve it!
and also, most importantly- what burger did you get?!
You guys comments are great and not snarky at all.
DH and I came from very humble background and appreciate everything we have now. We are lucky that we could buy everything off the registry in a instant if needed. Family is everything and we have a very loving network of people who already are crazy about this baby. I think it's healthy to feel a little disappointed, it's what you do with the feeling afterwards. Like all the other emotions I will vent and express my emotions but not let them Take over.
@Dax28 I had a hard time staying off my registry too, and honestly hardly anyone shopped off of it. But I still got a lot of the same types of things that a needed, and some of the things people picked for me were actually nicer or better than the basic ones I had on my registry. I agree that it's natural to be a little bummed, but you could be surprised and I'm sure your shower will be special and exciting no matter what! How awesome to get to celebrate baby with so many people who care about you and DH. It sounds like you've processed those feelings and will be able to enjoy the party! I hope it's great.
@HGRich sorry to hear about the mono! I would be super curious if they could test you as a carrier like @KirstinH88 suggested. Hopefully he is feeling much better by the time baby comes!
Re: Randoms 1/30
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17
DH's bday is tomorrow and I ordered him a "mancrate" more than a month ago. The theme of it is '1st time dad.' It consists of a manly diaper bag (ha!), some energy foods and drinks, a baby guide, and some other fun stuff. He doesn't mind not getting the showers or the attention, but I still wanted to give him a little something.
Also, while I love the guy, I am looking forward to a Saturday night BY MYSELF! He's driving down to his parents to go to a hockey game and I am going to order take-out, watch movies, and have myself a pants-off, dance-off... jam out with my clam out.... and then crash by 7:30pm. BLISS!!
Me 31, DH 32, Married 08/08
02/13/15-HSG-All Clear
ER 02/05-20 Retrieved - 11 Matured, 9 Fertilized, ET 2/10 (1 Transferred, 4 Frz) - BFP 2/19, M/C-3/5-Trisomy 16
ER 07/14-14 Retrieved,11 Matured, 10 Fertilized, ET 07/19 (2 Transferred, 6 Frz), BFP 7/28, 8/16 U/S-TWINS!
Due Date - April 6, 2017 UPDATED March 23, 2017!
I hope everyone is doing well. Can't believe some of us are in the single digits for how many weeks we have left. Time sure did fly by.
Again, sorry for not being an active member as I had planned.
@MrsBakes Sounds like you have had a ROUGH few months! Hopefully things begin to settle/calm down a bit so that you can catch your breath before baby gets here! Welcome back, hopefully you can stay!
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17
Baby Boy due 04/07/17
DD #2: May 2020
Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
Personally, the 3D/4D stuff creeps me out, so I'm going to pass, haha.
DD #2: May 2020
Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
Anyone have any advice or experience with having mono or being exposed to it while pregnant?
Baby Boy due 04/07/17
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17
I think my disappointment comes from people doing things last minute and not thinking ahead for such an important event. I'm an organized type of person and I know people do things differently.
I put a lot of time and research into the things on the registry and I'm afraid people are going to bring random gifts or nothing at all. I'm grateful that I get to see all my family to celebrate our first child and gifts should come second, but I still feel a little disappointed.
some of what you put time and effort into. But I guess if not, I hope they get you equivalent things you like just as much, and that the shower is a fun time anyway.
Cautiously expecting April 5, 2017
<a href="http://lilypie.com/"><img src="http://lmtf.lilypie.com/ZBoVm5.png" width="400" height="80" border="0" alt="Lilypie Maternity tickers" /></a>
Step 2 is to realize that while this is a big event for YOU, and you sent the invitations out months in advance, that doesn't mean it is a huge pressing concern for other people to get you a gift in advance. A lot of people shop the week or day of the shower because that's when it becomes relevant for their lives and they get down to the task of getting a gift. My best friend had her shower a few weeks ago, when I checked her registry to get a sense of what style of stuff she wanted to plan my gift, there was virtually nothing purchased off of it. By the time her shower rolled around a few days later, she received tons of the things that were on her registry. So, I wouldn't view that as a source of disappointment...other people have their own lives going on.
Step 3 is to accept that you're not going to get everything off of your registry. You're going to get things that you didn't register for, and you might not like some of those things and you'll decide to return them. The bottom line is that people spent time and money selecting a gift for you, so you should be gracious and thankful that they did. A lot of people don't have the network to have 70 people get them gifts. If there are still things that you need after your shower, that's on you and your DH to get them - other people are under no obligation to finance your baby.
Step 4 is to relax and enjoy your shower this weekend.
((If this comes off as snarky, I didn't intend it to; I can't help it...it's in my username, after all! I just really care about baby shower etiquette.))
@SnarkasaurusRex I don't think it was snarky. I agree with you, people will ALWAYS buy things not on your registry. The only thing I got from DS's baby shower was the carseat I wanted...and thats it. The same thing happened when we got married as well, which was expected tbh. Keep in mind they may buy the items somewhere else for a better deal so you may get some of the things anyway and not know it. We used our registry as a check-list/wish list so if there were things I didn't get from the shower that I still wanted, I just went and got it myself or saved for later down the road. @Dax28 Just enjoy it and relax, I'm sure the shower will be great!
DS--N14
Baby #2 EDD--4/16/17
DD1 born 3.2014
DD2 born 4.2017
Definitely try not to look at your registry anymore (I know, easier said than done) but you will have an awesome shower and your LO will be blessed with everything it needs!! And woohoo for gift cards!!
DH is about halfway through his interview right now. *fingers crossed* We just saw a little bit of downtown Des Moines last night and so far have a great vibe from this city. So nervous to hear back from him after the interview. Really, really enjoying this morning of drinking coffee and watching TV in bed without any children demanding anything from me. Feel a little bad that I am so relaxed and happy and DH has to do the hard stressful stuff today. Just trying to remember that the whole labor and birth thing is a lot more enjoyable for him.
DH: 30 year old pneumatic electrical engineer
BFP: June 25, 2016 and MC: July 3, 2016
DD2: April 16, 2017
BFP: November 30, 2018 EDD: August 14, 2019
@Dax28 It is really hard not to, but I would agree with @SnarkasaurusRex not to look at your registry before the shower. People definitely buy things wherever they already have a gift card or can find a cheaper price, so just because it's not marked as purchased doesn't mean they didn't purchase it for you (I had to go update my registries after my shower for this reason). People also wait until the absolute last minute to shop. Also, as a FTM I feel like I'm only guessing at what I will really need (apart from the obvious diapers, etc.) and some of the gifts that really stick out from my shower are from been-there mamas who went off registry.
I will say that after going through gifts from my first shower, we did get some things that we no longer need (either because we got hand-me-downs from SIL or friends, or someone gave us a handmade version of something we registered for, etc.). So save those gift receipts if you have them, and don't feel bad about returning some stuff to get what you actually need. I am finding this to be especially true with bibs - we got a lot of bibs, but at my shower the guests decorated a TON of plain bibs with fabric markers, so I'm going to return some of the ones that were purchased for us. It's mainly little stuff like that.
Just take a deep breath, relax and enjoy your shower mama! It sounds like you've put some hard work into it, so enjoy your day and soak in the love for you and your little one.
@Blueberry85 thank you--I had heard something like that and I'm hoping it's true. My brother had it in high school and I wonder if I got it at some point and didn't know. I'm trying to be optimistic.
and also, most importantly- what burger did you get?!
eta: the bump ate half my post
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17
DH and I came from very humble background and appreciate everything we have now. We are lucky that we could buy everything off the registry in a instant if needed. Family is everything and we have a very loving network of people who already are crazy about this baby. I think it's healthy to feel a little disappointed, it's what you do with the feeling afterwards. Like all the other emotions I will vent and express my emotions but not let them Take over.
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17
@HGRich sorry to hear about the mono! I would be super curious if they could test you as a carrier like @KirstinH88 suggested. Hopefully he is feeling much better by the time baby comes!