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May 2017 Moms
laurapalmier
member
Tearing/Episiotomies
laurapalmier
member
Copied & pasted from my og post in the randoms.
I have a birth related question for STMs! A handful of you mentioned second degree tears and I'm curious about what I can do to prevent it. I know sometimes it's just gonna happen but for now I am giving myself hope.
So my questions are:
did you tear?
how many stitches?
in what position did you push?
did you do perineal massage?
did you use any oils to help the baby 'glide' out?
sorry if the massage question is TMI. I've only heard of the using oil to assist in birth once or twice and not even sure if the hospital would allow it or what kind of oil you would use, but curious to hear if anyone has.
I have a birth related question for STMs! A handful of you mentioned second degree tears and I'm curious about what I can do to prevent it. I know sometimes it's just gonna happen but for now I am giving myself hope.
So my questions are:
did you tear?
how many stitches?
in what position did you push?
did you do perineal massage?
did you use any oils to help the baby 'glide' out?
sorry if the massage question is TMI. I've only heard of the using oil to assist in birth once or twice and not even sure if the hospital would allow it or what kind of oil you would use, but curious to hear if anyone has.
Re: Tearing/Episiotomies
-it as either a bad second degree or a third degree tear. I don't remember how many stitches.
-on my back
-no
-no
I didn't feel myself tearing. I asked the nurse if I had already tore (I had a very long labor) and she said yes. It hurt to go from sitting to standing/standing to sitting afterwards. I'm not sure if that's due to the tearing or the amount of time I spent pushing. While getting stitched I just wanted to know how DD was and her APGAR score.
LO#2 several years later, different Dr!!! I did do perineal massage starting at 30 weeks. I used coconut oil. Had a 1st degree tear with 2 stitches. I felt like it healed quickly compared to previous birth. Did most labor walking or sitting on birthing stool/ball however hospital required the actual birth be done on the bed on you back, despite my many attempts to stall moving to the bed lol
LO#3 Same procedure as with previous for massage. Small 1st degree and decided against stitches as it was so small. Again labor walking or sitting on birthing stool/ball. Birthed on all fours.
edited to add I did not feel the tears but did feel the episiotomy
The aftercare wasn't awful, but it also wasn't pleasant. Sitting down was uncomfortable- I would definitely recommend a donut pillow (or just the boppy) for the car ride home. Also, they gave me a plastic squeeze bottle to use while peeing, and it was magic- just spray warm water on the stitches while you pee so the pee doesn't burn the wound. That + ice packs + Tucks pads = life for the first couple of weeks.
Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017
*formerly kayemjay*
I had a 2nd degree tear (both times). I have no idea how many stitches that is, they just mention what level tear. And I was too busy snuggling with a newborn to care how many! Both times I had an epidural, so I pushed in the typical on your back, leg in stirrups. I didn't do any massage, but my nurses and OB were really good at massaging/stretching while I was doing practice pushing. I tried really hard to pause when the doctor told me to so he could do some more stretching as the baby glides out.
I talked with my OB before delivery that I preferred a natural tear over an episiotomy (unless an episiotomy was a lifesaving measurement because baby needed to be out right away) so he discusses with me that he prefers to let moms tear naturally as well and that the nurses automatically will work on stretching/massaging as your pushing. Thats why they also recommend slow and steady pushing, your body will naturally stretch.
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Peri bottle, Tucks Pads, Dermaplast spray, and the ice packs the nurses make you will be your best friend! And the stool softeners!
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s that I don’t know you. Stranger Danger.
FTM here and I had a first degree tear with just a couple stitches. Prior to birth, I was extremely nervous about the possibility of tearing! I had an epidural (could feel contractions and pain in abdomen. Pressure in the vaginal area but no pain) and didn't feel any pain tearing or getting stitched up. The nurse did a great job massaging me during labor and said I had one thick band that would most likely tear. We were both surprised that it ended up being a first degree tear and not anything worse. Honestly, the aftercare was super easy. I didn't need any pain meds, never needed dermoplast or tuck pads, and showered as soon as my epidural wore off a few hours later. I was up walking around that same day and got released the next day. I even walked 2 miles the night I was released with the baby in a stroller! While walking, I remember telling my husband we needed to go slower because my body just didn't "feel" like it normally did but all was fine.
I know now there are all kinds of experiences with tears but I wanted to share mine since it was extremely positive. I hope I can say the same when we have another LO!
My OB said the exact opposite, that she'd prefer to have a smooth cut heal itself than a maybe more ragged tear. As it turned out, a different OB was there for the delivery and we didn't get a chance to really talk about those kinds of things. To answer the OP, I had a 2nd degree tear, maybe 5 stitches, and I had an epidural with seriously numb and good-for-nothing legs so the only position I could only be in was on my back. No to the perineal fingers and oils. Wish I had known about those things, I may have inquired if they provided that type of thing. (Also mentioning---I think echoing the random thread---that there's self-"massage" fingering we can do late in the 3rd trimester to help stretch and prepare our lady parts. I'll do that this time around.)
They just told me how to care for myself- squirt bottle, sits baths, and then the dermaplast tucks pads ice pack in the hospital underwear deal. I was pretty sore for about a week- I needed Motrin and delaudid constantly in the hospital and wish I had gotten something stronger!!
I'm hoping that the second time around I don't have as tough a recovery- I really left like I had been run over by a car...but I'm ok with whatever winds up happening.
did you tear? Yes 2nd degree
how many stitches? I asked the dr while she was stitching me up and she said something along the lines of "we don't count here - there dissolvable so won't need to know for removal"
in what position did you push? Laying on my back holding my own legs back
did you do perineal massage? No but the nurse was definitely doing some stretches while I was pushing or in between - weird but I appreciated it because I'm sure it helped in some way
did you use any oils to help the baby 'glide' out? I brought coconut oil but was too in the moment to ask DH to get it and didn't coach him beforehand on being in charge of anything. So it just sat in the bag.
Also, wanted to mention that the warnings about the "ring of fire" they gave me during labor since I was Med-free actually ended up feeling like a pair of those short-ended surgical scissors was used to cut the top (clitoris area) of my vagina when her head was coming out. But that must've been me feeling myself tear? Which was actually the opposite side from where I thought I felt it. Super strange and def. one of the most painful parts but I've never heard anyone say the same experience so nothing to worry about for FTMs.
This is also kind of related but the hospital I delivered at required patients to urinate before moving into recovery so DH held DD for at least 45mins while I sat on the toilet not able to feel or control anything happening down there. I finally gave up trying and the nurse had to insert a catheter instead which was also majorly painful. I've never heard of this requirement but if any of you are worried I'd ask about it during your hospital visits.
I started tearing with DS in 2007. Doctor did an episiotomy in the shape of an upside down V, like ^. I had an epidural so I didn't feel anything. I had to have stitches down both sides and they didn't tell me to what degree but my mother said he put in about 30 stitches. It was an incredibly painful recovery. The spray, water bottle, ice packs did not help. I ended up in the ER a week later in terrible pain and it turned out some of the stitches were infected. I got antibiotics and narcotics for the pain.
The scar tissue was pretty bothersome for years afterward, especially during PMS times I would feel very sore.
Praying that doesn't happen again!
how many stitches? I don't remember 4-5 maybe?
in what position did you push? I had an epi with numb legs so my back was the only option
did you do perineal massage? no
did you use any oils to help the baby 'glide' out? no
how many stitches? 2? very few because it fell out after 3/4 days
in what position did you push? back
did you do perineal massage? no
did you use any oils to help the baby 'glide' out? no
So I'm actually shocked that I only had 1st degree tear, especially considering DS was 8lb 10oz and head circumference was 95th percentile. I pushed for about 2 hours and his head actually got stuck for a bit. The doctor said that helped with minimal tearing because it allowed my body to stretch itself vs. tear. However, I had internal tearing which was extremelly uncommon - not uncomfortable but just rare.
Episiotomies were something I had asked about at my appointments and I had been told that in general they did not use them and would prefer to let you tear a little. However, in my case my sons head was above the 100th percentile in size and I think that a tear would ultimately have been more traumatic. My MIL who is a labor and delivery nurse was there when I delivered and told me that she was surprised that they didn't need to use the forceps or vacuum.
I have no idea how many stitches were involved and I never ever even considered looking down there. I used all the recommended healing techniques, the sitz bath, dermaplast, padsicles, peri bottle and I would also use my detachable shower head on a super super gentle setting and rinse it with cool water every day. It all helped a little bit but it took a few weeks to feel noticeably better. By the six week mark i had pretty much no pain and have had little to no residual pain since then.
My ob this time around has told me that it is generally unlikely that I will need to have an episiotomy this time around, so I'm just gonna go ahead and cling to that hope.
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
how many stitches? None either time
in what position did you push? On my back for both. With one I had no meds and with one I had an epi. I just liked pushing on my back
did you do perineal massage? Nope
did you use any oils to help the baby 'glide' out? Nope
I think my trick to not tearing was not pushing that hard. Or pushing only during a contractions instead of pushing on a specific count. With my second I didn't really push until her head was already out and I pushed once to get the shoulders out. I'm not sure if that really did anything or if I just naturally have a stretchy vag. I think a lot of it is like stretch marks. You can only control so much and the rest is largely genetic.
B born 7/15/13, C born 3/2/15, #3 on the way May '17
I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke free. A diversified multi-cultural, post-modern deconstruction that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond! I’m new wave, but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and bio-degradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive.
how many stitches? No idea
in what position did you push? On my back curling inward to push
did you do perineal massage? No I had heard about that prior to start of labor to loosen that area up but never did it.
did you use any oils to help the baby 'glide' out? My ob slid some oil around down there trying to help the glide my son out. She also kept running her fingers around the hole to help stretch.
I believe I only tore because my ob said at some point I'm going to tell you to hold pushing so I can adjust his shoulders and just as she starts telling me I got this great urge to push and out he came; tear I did. It stung for a while when I peed. Loved my bottle for after bathroom time
how many stitches? not sure, but I told the dr that saw me at my 6 week postpartum appointment that the other dr who did the delivery was down there for a long time stitching.
in what position did you push? lying on my back
did you do perineal massage? I did not, but the doctor was massaging and stretching in between contractions when I started pushing.
did you use any oils to help the baby 'glide' out? no
With #1, they cut. Honestly I'm not even sure it was necessary, but I had an epidural so I didn't care.
With #2, there was a slight tear, apparently because DD came out with her hand at her face (and has had her thumb in her mouth pretty much since then!)
how many stitches?
With #1 I got some number of stitches that I don't remember / I'm never sure I knew. I don't remember it being a big deal in the recovery process. Pooping was obviously a thing in the beginning, but I feel like that's true no matter whether you tear. The whole thing was nbd especially compared to everything else going on medically (basically just breastfeeding stuff.)
With #2 I declined stitches because the midwife said it didn't look so bad, and I just wanted to be done. And I had no drugs. I also don't remember this being a problem recovery-wise.
in what position did you push?
For #1, I was mostly lying down and I had some sort of push bar thing that I held.
For #2, I was mostly sitting, but a little reclined so the baby could come out. I was in a tub for this part -- she was born underwater.
did you do perineal massage?
nope, never, but I wonder if I should this time around. It's not a bad idea.
did you use any oils to help the baby 'glide' out?
no, though I think the water birth for #2 helped!
The one thing I would suggest, is making Vagi Pads and storing them in your freezer. These were amazing to have on hand, and I would use several a day during recovery. It is simple ingredients like Lavendar, and Witch Hazel (Alcohol free).
how many stitches? I think it was 1-2 stitches.
in what position did you push? On my back but sitting up a bit with my legs tucked in.
did you do perineal massage? No, I was too lazy. May be I'll try this time.
did you use any oils to help the baby 'glide' out? No, but once again not a bad idea.
For me, my baby came out after 5-10 minutes of pushing. It didn't take long! I was surprised that I didn't tear much considering how quickly he came out. I don't know if this made a difference, but I laboured in a hot tub until I was 7cm.