Twatwaffle Tuesday

hartmich · January 2017

let's hear 'em, ladies

Image: https://media2.giphy.com/media/miXPIRzO0EK2c/200.gif#57

sheknows6 · January 2017

I have a doozy today. Warning, extremely long post ahead. Complete with JT stare.

I've been friends with this girl and her husband for over 10 years. She was the matron of honor in my wedding, and her husband was a groomsman for my H.

Her H asked my H for a ride to a gaming store last night, and my H said yes before he told me what was going on. I reminded him of some things we needed to do that we had already planned and that I was sorry but he'd have to tell his friend no. My friend and her H share a car, so this is why he needs a ride occasionally.

All four of us and another mutual friend are in a group chat on Facebook, and when my H tells her H no, she gets on the group chat and says to my H:

"Yeah next time you do that how about just tell him you can't do it, Don't tell him you're going to do something and back out of it, But a simple you can't would have sufficed," etc etc.

She was angry that he told her H yes and then had to back out of it, forcing her to help him. Mind you, this is all over a ride to go pick up a gaming console he had bought.

I was so angry I left the group chat. Our mutual friend who is in the chat and saw her berating my husband texted me to let me know that she had also privately messaged her to complain that my H had to back out of helping her H. I got back in the chat this morning and absolutely let her have it.

Me: "We have been friends for entirely too long for me to not speak my mind at this point. Your husband asked my husband for a favor yesterday, and he said yes before he checked with me. I told him no, I'm sorry, we have other things going on and I needed him at the house. So he told [her H] I'm sorry no. For you to come on here, in front of [our mutual friend] as well might I add, and proceed to bitch and complain to my husband is unacceptable. How absolutely ridiculous do you have to be to come on here and complain about how he chose to say no???? You do realize you just asked for a favor and then complained right??? I am FLOORED that you would pull something like this, and I am extremely upset with how you chose to speak to my husband over this. I would greatly appreciate an apology because you have NO RIGHT to tell him he should have said this or he should have said that. It literally doesn't matter how he chose to say no, the answer was still "I'm sorry no I can't help". This isn't how you talk to your friends and I can't believe you even did that yesterday"

She gave me a half-assed "non-apology" (where you apologize that someone feels a certain way, not for what you did wrong) and is now so upset she deleted messenger off her phone. I don't feel bad whatsoever. Although she and her H are my longest married friends, I think it's time to sever that cord. She is extremely entitled, selfish, arrogant, and rude.

How entitled do you have to be to voluntarily give up your second car, (they're trying to downsize to a tiny home and thought they'd only need one car) ask your friends for rides constantly because you don't have two cars, and then sass your best friend's H on what he should have said the one time out of a million that he couldn't help you?!

For real??? Is this my life right now???

Image: https://media.giphy.com/media/9G3wg7lH5DpxC/giphy.gif

LoveInDC · January 2017

My boss. My supervisors. All being TWs. I've been sitting here, BEGGING for assignments. Offering suggestions for what I can do. Emails and emails. And they ignore all of them. And then ask me to write weekly reports on what I do (i.e., nothing). And now I'm working on my annual review (after only 4 months of nothing). So now I'm in the awkward spot of having to explain to my supervisors that I don't do anything lately and that it's not my fault while trying to not put my job at risk.

P.S. Even if I get it through their thick skulls that I'm getting paid to do nothing, they probably won't care and will give me my annual raise anyway. Which will just be more frustrating than anything.

heatherdubrow · January 2017

My TW is a woman on the beach yesterday. She proceeds to walk away from her (maybe) 2 year old son, all the way across the beach. I watch this kid crying, wandering around looking for her. So I got up and took his hand and walked him over to her. She doesn't even say thank you. Just yells over to her husband 'somebody else had him!'

lund · January 2017

Just this on CD1:

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/jx/8nhpicw0hxpk.gif

jenotontx · January 2017

@sheknows6 WOW I can't believe your friend would do something like that. She definitely sounds extremely entitled. I take it this isn't the only situation like this that has occured? So sorry.

@LoveInDC I have had a job like that before too and It's terribly frusterating. Hopefully the work flow picks up soon and your supervisors recognize you have been taking the initiative to find work!

hartmich · January 2017

@lund CD1 here too -

Image: https://www.winemind.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/drink-from-bottle-joke.gif

@heatherdubrow Ugh why do these people have kids when we're all practically killing ourselves to get KU?!

@sheknows6 I hate when people overreact about little things like that, don't they have bigger problems!?

@loveindc At least you have documentation that you have tried to work!

ETA: gif

heatherdubrow · January 2017

@hartmich I know! She had 3 kids with her.

sheknows6 · January 2017

JJMNO1616 said:

@sheknows6 WOW I can't believe your friend would do something like that. She definitely sounds extremely entitled. I take it this isn't the only situation like this that has occured? So sorry.

In the ten + years we have been friends, I could tell you stories that would make you wonder why I even speak to either of them. I don't usually have an issue cutting off toxic people, but with them, it's been especially hard as we've been so close for so long.

Today was definitely a step in that direction. I don't think we will be speaking anymore.

lund · January 2017

@sheknows6 um, yeah. What an entitled TW. She sounds like she needs a reality check.

@LoveInDC I feel very similarly about my current job, and I agree it's very frustrating!

@heatherdubrow good lord. Thank god you were there! How do people like this get babies and we don't?

sheknows6 · January 2017

@heatherdubrow, just wow. And people like that get to be parents.

LoveInDC · January 2017

@heatherdubrow - Parents who just assume someone's got an eye on their kid in a public place annoy me. Family gatherings? Sure. Not a public beach. Not cool.

@sheknows6 - Sorry about the toxic friends. If it makes you feel better, DH was best friends with this guy ("A") for 10 years. He was a complete asshole, but DH put up with it and always made excuses for him. Eventually, he just went too far and DH cut him off. He wasn't even invited to the wedding. It's been almost 2 years and DH has no regrets. Sometimes, a relationship isn't worth keeping. Especially if the only reason is "we've been friends for so long". Good luck making the best choice for you

jenotontx · January 2017

@sheknows6 I figured it was a chronic issue. I totally understand how hard it is to cut off long term friendships though. I have had to do it myself and it's never easy even though you know it's for the best.

@heatherdubrow I can't stand people like that! I feel like everytime I go to the mall I end up looking after some lost child. I have on numerous occasions seen a child or parent just wounder off and then I stand there and watch the kid to make sure the parent has found them again. I realize kids can sneek away quickly but geez people, watch your children!

bluejeanbabi05 · January 2017

Argh @sheknows6 I'm sorry about your friend. It's hard to make those kind of decisions. I have a friend like that and it's like a merry go round, I can't find the strength to quit her.

Tylenol is a TW. It doesn't work for me. I miss ibuprofen. And booze. And hot baths. I'm trying to be a good little TWWer this cycle.

canonmom413 · January 2017

@sheknows6
I would have responded with, "There is something called Oober!" And if they don't get my reference to Gilmore Girls, they clearly don't deserve to be my friend. In your case, maybe Uber would have been fine

, haha.
How shitty for her to berate your husband publicly like that. People suck.
edit spelling is for cool kids.

eggplantface · January 2017

@sheknows6 How self-centered of your friend to downsize then expect you to pick up the slack! It's like on Seinfeld when Kramer got rid of his refrigerator because he wanted to eat fresh food but then started using Jerry's fridge and getting huffy when Jerry said no. You make the decision to get rid of a car voluntarily, you have to live with the inconvenience, including your friends having to cancel being your chauffeur. And how passive aggressive to bring it up in a group chat. If she were upset, a phone call would have been the best way. Agreed with @LoveInDC, sometimes you have to cut off a toxic friend despite the length of friendship. If it's more hassle than happiness, she gots to go.

@bluejeanbabi05 I hate being chained to Tylenol too. It doesn't work for me.

My head's being a TW. I'm getting sick. Again.

feeislove · January 2017

I don't know who is being the TW but it's either one person or several. Prepare yourselves for a bit of a long post. So I work in a call center for a big box home improvement store and I'm part of a team that support agents in our department (our department mostly receives calls from stores). Agents call us whenever they need help resolving an issue or just handling the call overall. Well about two years ago they took a lot of our call types away and now our IT deparment handles them. As a result, we don't have as much work. Since call centers are all about productivity, management decided to have us take calls from other departments. Ok cool. As I've mentioned in a few posts before, there was a chance that we would be taking escalated calls from (usually) angry customers. This has created a lot of anxiety among our team members. Some of us have spoken to customers before coming from customer-facing departments (like me but I hated talking to customers which is why I LEFT) but some of us haven't. None of us want to take escalation calls. Management can't seem to decide whether we're going to do them or not. 3 of us started taking calls from other departments yesterday, two of us were ONLY taking escalation calls and I was only getting process questions. Obviously this is causing issues because it's not fair. Our supervisor tells us one thing and then something completely different happens. Needless to say, morale is tanking. Everyone is frustrated and I predict people are going to start running from this place. Fast and hard. I know I am. I've got my eye on a position in a completely different area of the company. I'm just waiting for them to post the application.

kiki75 · January 2017

@sheknows6 I just love when people have a whole plan to save a bunch of money by...mooching off their friends. And then probably acting like you guys are idiots for not doing the same, yes? Costs of taxis/Uber/renting should be one of the things you add into your calculations when you're running the numbers to see if it would be cheaper to drop to a one-car household. And it was to pick up a GAMING CONSOLE for crying out loud. It's not like it was something even vaguely important and it apparently wasn't even like there was no other option without YH taking him.

@LoveInDC Here's what I recommend. Find what you have accomplished, no matter how small and call those things out. Including stuff like how you have made yourself available and when you have gotten something to do, you've been right on it. Then throw in the stuff about things that you see that you could do and would enjoy doing, even if it includes some additional professional development time, and things like, "I look forward to becoming even more of an asset to the company by doing X,Y,Z and helping out with issues P,Q,R that I have observed."

sheknows6 · January 2017

The support on this board is amazing. I heart all of you ladies, thank you

LoveInDC · January 2017

Thanks for the job sympathy, everyone, and for the advice @Kiki75! Luckily, I'm a writer by profession, so spinning bullshit to say what I want is what I do. I just hope this actually brings about some change. It's annoying because my job seems like a dream (great paycheck, work from home, little to no work), but I'm so ready to get back to actually doing what I love. FX for me ladies!

kmac09 · January 2017

@sheknows6 @LoveInDC @heatherdubrow @LuND @feeislove UGH so many people are TWs! I am so sorry for what all you ladies have had to deal with.

@eggplantface and @canonmom413 sorry about the headache and tylenol being sucky as well.

Tennis11785 · January 2017

Can I TW myself? Even though it's physically impossible for me to be pregnant, I'm SS myself like crazy. Oh, I can smell my husbands glass of wine from over here. Oh and it smells gross. Maybe it's a sign. Oh the coffee hit me strong today...maybe it's a sign.

Yeah, it's a sign I'm bsc. Cause I haven't even Oed yet.

It's gonna be a long tww.

hartmich · January 2017

@tennis11785 Don't worry, I've actually gotten full on AF before and been like "well maybe this is what people mean when they say they bled during their pregnancy and that's why they didn't realize they were KU..."

eggplantface · January 2017

hartmich said:

@tennis11785 Don't worry, I've actually gotten full on AF before and been like "well maybe this is what people mean when they say they bled during their pregnancy and that's why they didn't realize they were KU..."

OMG every. Damn. Time. And H doesn't help, I tell him "I started spotting today so no baby" and he goes "Is spotting a bad sign?" And being super knowledgeable about this I go "Not necessarily, a lot of women spot in early pregnancy, but for me, yes, it's a bad sign." H goes "So you could still be pregnant."

Oh, and my RE telling me "We'll give you a pregnancy test before we start the meds because some women think they got their period but it turns out it's not their period and they're pregnant." NOT HELPING.

heatherdubrow · January 2017

@Tennis11785 I'm literally on bcp for my FET and I still do this!

lulu1180 · January 2017

@hartmich Yes!!!!!!!! I have tried to convince myself of this on more than one occasion! And then I try to talk myself down with science knowing that my BBT is low. Stupid speshul snoflayks ruining it for the rest of us!

hartmich · January 2017

@eggplantface @lulu1180 Yes, this also is usually after SEVERAL BFNs and a low BBT. But I've read women on those *other forums* who go to the doctor in these cases and demand blood draws because they insist the HPTs are wrong. At least I haven't done that... yet.

jsnakehole · January 2017

@heatherdubrow that's one of my biggest pet peeves- I've watched people let their kids wander off on subway platforms, and these parents don't even look up from their cell phones. I try to fight the urge to go all teacher and direct the children back to their parents.

lulu1180 · January 2017

My body is totally a TW. On top of the bad TTC day I was having, I've been spotting and just figured it must be residual from the HSG or something. Nope, cuz it's getting heavier, like nearly AF heavy (which is still pretty light for me). And I just started getting some heavier cramping although it's mostly on the left side. So either AF is starting again (which would make this cycle 11 days.....cue JT stare at my uterus) or one of the ovarian cysts is rupturing. Ugh! Why can't my body just do what it's supposed to!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hartmich · January 2017

@lulu1180 This gif at least made me a laugh a little. But it's also #truth.

Image: https://media4.giphy.com/media/3FPBG8l5AxCPS/200.gif#138

and also

adirat · January 2017

Can I steal that JT stare gif? Someone is here in the waiting room with a crying -- wailing! -- baby. At the RE's.

My husband said "maybe this is to make you change your mind" sigh

sheknows6 · January 2017

@adirat steal away. That sounds like the worst, hugs

kmac09 · January 2017

@adirat here you go

. And I'm so sorry. That's awful.
Image result for justin timberlake stare gif

heatherdubrow · January 2017

@adirat the Insensitivity is astounding.

crazypuglady · January 2017

@LoveInDC- Several years ago, a big program my team worked on was eliminated.. right after the new fiscal year started. Since it was the only thing my team worked on, and because funding for other projects in our organization had been tied up in other projects that other teams were working on, we bascially had almost a whole year of doing nothing. Day in, day out with minimal things to do. It sounds like it's a dream... but being bored every day for that long was awful! Luckily, we managed to get a few projects going the following year, and have since grown our team and our capabilities/customer base, but it was really depressing to show up and sit there every day.

Speaking of Work...
My TW is the all-day training I had to do today. I'm involved in a big budget collaborative project which essentially takes prototype instruments from various customers, and tests them in a laboratory setting. After several rounds of developmental testing, selected instruments may be adapted for soldier use in the field. We spent two hours this morning listening to the customer present an instrument overview in which he described to us every. single.detail. Including the power switch.. the interface outlets, the little green light that comes on when it's ready to scan. OMFG I wanted to scratch my eyes out. The man spoke like Ben Stein but slower. And he apparently didn't prepare the slides (nor, read them, for that matter) because he couldn't explain what some things were when there were questions. It didn't help that one of the reps from the other organization that was managing this portion of testing kept asking blatantly obvious questions.. that the customer couldn't even answer about his own instrument. (example- a read-out at one point said "In-op". The rep asked what it stood for. The customer couldn't say. Someone offered "in-operable". The customer said.. "oh yeah.. that's probably it." *facepalm*) It was so bad.. I started timing slides. We spent 13 minutes talking about a slide with 6 bullets on it... and the bullets pointed out buttons on the screen interface. If a two year old can figure out an iPhone, we can figure out what 6 buttons do. What a waste of time. OH.. and the rep (who also at one time used to work on my team, so she's been in a lab before and knows how safety works around here) got mad because we refused to allow them to operate the class 4 laser (danger to eyes and skin) in the conference room. WTF.

cherryblossomgirl507 · January 2017

I feel like this is a petty complaint after reading @sheknows6 and @adriat and everyone else's story but here goes...

Gotta rant on my XH. My parents used to watch DD (8) after school, but due to their health, they're not able to anymore, so I was preparing to put DD in after school care. XH, who only has her every other weekend and some holidays, then asked if he could have her after school since his job is flexible. Great, not a problem. Today's the first day he'd have to, but he told me last week had an appointment so he asked if I could get her and he'd come pick her up from me after his appointment. Okay, no problem, I tell him I have a meeting at 4 so just come get her by then.

He asks me at 8:15 this morning if I can just "keep her all day" so he "wouldn't have to drive all over". I reminded him, I have a meeting this afternoon so no, I really can't and he says "Well I have her at work during meetings and she's just fine so I didn't think it would be an issue". I started to try to tell him that what works for him and his job doesn't necessarily work for me and mine...and then I remembered I'm dealing with someone who is incapable of seeing things from any perspective other than his own so I saved my breath. DD came to work with me, sat through my meeting with me and did fine. But I can't have this be a regular thing. And now I also remember why we're not together anymore.

ETA: Also I think today is O day and FI won't be home til midnight so FX...

jsnakehole · January 2017

This may be stupid, but my cat is being a total TW tonight.

First he decided to yowl like he was being murdered, then hide when I called him. After about five minutes of me panicking that someone broke in and for whatever reason went after my cat (I'm already very jumpy because a) DH isn't here and b) there was a break in a neighborhood over a few nights ago), he popped out from under the futon, smacked the dog, and took off. He then proceeded to run the length of my apartment at top speed for ten minutes, taking occasional breaks to steal napkins/tabs from frozen dinner boxes/the dog's food. He's currently attempting to burrow into my work bag. Hopefully I will not have to tell my boss my cat ate my lesson plan book.

breezybee · January 2017

@eggplantface great Seinfeld reference for @sheknows6 's problem. Forget those fools! You'll be so much better off. Or at least take a nice long break.
@jsnakehole I'm so sorry, but your cat sounds hilarious. I feel you on the being nervous at home alone when they're acting weird, though!

slaven · January 2017

@LoveInDC While my job is part time, I get paid extremely well considering what I actually do. My job is boring. I do all the things and there isn't even anything else for me to ask to do. Thankfully it's part time because I could not be that bored for 40 hours a week. The other day I was working on some stuff for some volunteering I do while at work and had nothing to do. My day went by so fast and I felt so accomplished. I think I would actually enjoy working if I had a job that had me actually doing something.

@feeislove I could never to escalated/angry calls. I'd just cry.

@hartmich I've totally done a HPT after getting AF for the same reason.

I have no real TW. I had to sub for music today. Most classes were fine. First graders really can't just sit on the floor and watch an interactive powerpoint type thing, it's like herding cats. And I had to deal with 3rd grade "he's talking about me" b.s. and in the end I gave up on the powerpoint thing and just put on The Lorax (for music class)

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