New Mamas - Pregnant after IF graduates : random thread

Griffin5413 · January 2017

@capps42613 - you are absolutely right!

tvh1982 · January 2017

I can only imagine how it is to have an adult conversation the whole day @jerseygirl856.
Nice to hear they kept you busy, better that way so you can't miss baby Leigh too much.
I don't think she's to upset with you for falling asleep, having you close was probably all she needed!
Glad she did well too, makes it maybe a bit easier to be at work.
How are the nights going? Do you get some sleep?

Tulips29 · January 2017

@tvh1982 thanks for that. I guess you're right about the amount he's getting as being enough. He stops eating on his own and just falls asleep on top of me. When he's hungry he definitely makes himself heard lol. I also offer him both boobs during 1 feeding and I learned when he is really eating and when he's just suckling on me like a pacifier. I also switched up my routine. Now I breastfeed during the day every 2-3 hours as he gets hungry and pump in between the feeding sessions. Whatever I pump I just save for the night and last night I had enough for 3 feedings. It was a lot easier to just warm up a bottle when he woke up hungry than sitting BF for an hour wondering if he's getting enough. I was able to sleep during each of those 3 hours that he slept!

Another question - how long did it take your babes to gain back the weight they lost after birth? And how long did it take for the belly button to fall off? We're at day 10 and it's still not falling off.

@Jerseygirl856 ah I can't imagine going back to work yet but it's great that Leigh did so well! It's totally understandable being tired and falling asleep at the end of the day when you come home.

capps42613 · January 2017

@Tulips29 Cason gained all his weight back by 12 days old. His belly button was about 14 days.

tvh1982 · January 2017

Sounds good @tulips29!
Keep following your instincts, a mummy instinct is wonderful

Pia needed about 14 days to be back on weight, probably due to me not having any milk.
Her belly button clip fell of at day 8 and still had some leftover in it. Not sure when that was completely clean. Definitely by day 21 as I had Pia for a weighing and they said how lovely the belly button was

Jerseygirl856 · January 2017

@tvh1982 I started bathing her at the same time every night and she falls asleep between 9-10pm and mostly sleeps through the night. She may wake up once at 2am for a bottle but then she falls asleep while in bed with me. She's 3 1/2 mos and is such a happy and active little person that the sleepless nights are well worth it.

Griffin5413 · January 2017

Eli gained his weight back by his 2 week check up and his umbilical cord fell off by day 10 or so.

@Jerseygirl856 - I can't wait for Eli to sleep longer than 3 hours at night!

Drove2u · January 2017

Viktoria lost her belly button around day 11 but still had some dried blood in it or something. We bathed her last night and it's now all gone.
Not sure about her weight since we have only been at the pediatrician once which was three days after being out of the hospital.
The lactation nurse is coming over
tomorrow and she brings a scale sometimes so maybe I will know then.

capps42613 · January 2017

Not going to get my hopes up.. but last night was awesome. He went to bed around 10pm and woke up at 3am. changed his diaper, fed him 4oz, burped him, & got him back to a deep sleep in 15 minutes (sometimes it takes me at least an hour to do all that). Then he woke up at 7am for good. We'll see how tonight goes

Griffin5413 · January 2017

@capps42613 - that sounds like a great night! FX this will be the new norm for you. I'm hoping Eli gets there soon too. Usually at least one feeding a night he is up for 1-2 hours.

tvh1982 · January 2017

Fantastic @capps42613!

Pia goes back to sleep right away at night, it never had been a problem (attached to me or not) so am very lucky there.
I change her, feed her, burp her and back to bed.
She sometimes is still awake after I have cleaned her bottle and put everything ready for the next round. But she just makes small noises.
Last night she slept in her own bed in her own room!
I missed her (guess it's me that has it tough) but think she sleeps better as I toss a lot.

What time do you bathe Leigh @jerseygirl856?
I try to bathe Pia every night (or we shower together) yet haven't managed to get a fixed time.

She now get a bottle at about 9 and sleeps at around 10/11.
Which then makes her want a tiny bottle at 1 or 2 ish and again at 4 or 5 ish.
Which is not ideal, those feedings should move about two hours

The worse is, at 4/5 o'clock she only sleeps an hour, hour and a half, and is ready to start her day.
This mummy isn't!
If I pick her up and place her skintight she sleeps again until 8-9, which is fantastic. Even though I don't sleep proper I do get some catnaps and try to shower at 8.

During the day she sleeps from 20 min to 4 hours, whatever she feels like. In her crib or attached to me.

ultratomato · January 2017

Trying to get my girls on a schedule which I'm finding difficult. They eat 2.5 to 3 oz every three hours but sometimes it's 2.5 hours. How do I get them to sleep longer? They have gained more then their birth weight any suggestions on how to get more sleep at night for us? I know it may be different with two but we try to keep them close to each other when they feed. We also downloaded a great app to keep track of their feedings and bowel movements which is very helpful with two babies and it tracks their weight as well.

mskeenan · January 2017

@tulips29 I am breastfeeding, occasionally give my son a bottle of pumped milk if someone else is watching him . I will admit it was very hard in the beginning and my milk was very slow to come in . My supply took awhile to really increase . Now it's great and I am pumping and freezing extra to have extra on hand for when I go back to work . I haven't figured out my pumping schedule yet at work. It sounds like you are in a good rhythm now . I had to figure out when Vince was using me as a pacifier too . He will still try to hang on after he's done eating and if I'm not careful he can really make me sore

Vince lost a little over 10% of his body weight in the days we were in the hospital and his first days at home . By his two week checkup he was back up to his birth weight and had even gained more . Now he's gaining weight well .

I wanna say he lost his belly button a little before two weeks but there was still part of it that finally came out around the two week mark .

@capps42613 hope you got some good sleep last night

Vince's sleep is still all over the place . On a few glorious occasions I've managed to get 5 hours consecutively but then sometimes it's every 2 hours . I'd say our current average is feedings 3 hours apart maybe ? Good news is that Vince usually goes back to bed right after eating .

Im trying to bathe my boy every couple of days when I feel like it and usually do it before bed . I've heard that can help with sleep @ultratomato but I'm not sure if that's true . Some people try swaddling to get babies to sleep longer - swaddling wasn't my thing . I now put Vince in a sleep suit that is puffy that I guess is sort of like swaddling and that seems to help . I also use a dohm sound machine for white noise to signal its time to sleep . It must be hard with two @ultratomato I've always wondered if twins ever sync up their schedules.

Griffin5413 · January 2017

@ultratomato - Eli is still only sleeping 2.5 - 3 hours a night and we are almost 6 weeks. We give him a bath in the evening and try to head to bed. Obviously we don't go to sleep at 8 but we try to keep the lights down etc.
@capps42613 - when did you switch Cason to 4oz? I'm trying to figure out when to move Eli from 3 to 4 oz.

tvh1982 · January 2017

I found it very difficult to get Pia from 2 to 3 hours.
I needed a slightly breakdown to realise this was something I couldn't keep up.
During the day I tried to distract/entertain her with a pacifier, rocking her, walking around,... anything as long as she didn't really scream for food. It would start with just 5 min, but slowly got to 10 and then a whooping 30 min.
I also gave her 10cc of water in between. This I got recommended by my doctor, so check first as it's not something one can just give!
At night I didn't push it, she did that herself once she started during the day.

capps42613 · January 2017

@Griffin5413 He's been eating 4oz since he was 10 days old! When he cries relentlessly, that's when I know he's still hungry. So that's how I knew to up his milk. Sometimes I have to give him an extra ounce or 2 now but it's not consistent enough for me to increase it each feeding. 4oz usually satisfies him still.

Ps- congrats on the GB win last night... I thought for sure they were gonna go into OT

what a game though!

Griffin5413 · January 2017

@capps42613 thanks for the info! I think I need to up Eli to 4 oz. I'm thinking that will keep him full longer. It was a great game yesterday!

mskeenan · January 2017

Despite getting more sleep now I am still feeling like a total zombie . My coffee addiction is getting out of control ahhhh .

Jerseygirl856 · January 2017

@tvh1982 how awesome that Pia slept in her own room and bed! I think I have attachment/anxiety issues because I can't sleep unless she is in the room with me. I bather her around 7-8.
@Griffin5413 I remember my pediatrician telling me to feed Leigh until she was full. So she went from 4oz and is now up 6oz. But I usually give her 6oz right before bed. And during the day it's 4 or 5 oz at feedings.

Tulips29 · January 2017

@mskeenan it sounds like we're on the same schedule with our babes. I now BF and then pump and save whatever I pump during the day for the night feedings. We're eating around 2-2.5 oz at a time and that's as much as i can pump out each time too. I'm really hoping I can start building up my stash soon so I can freeze some milk for the future.

Btw there's a great app to track feedings, sleep, diaper changes, etc. it's call Hatch Baby. It's really great and I don't have to write down when I last fed Aiden, how many wet/dirty diapers he's had, etc.

@capps42613 I hope you continue to have such great nights!

@ultratomato I keep reading and hearing from friends that it's hard to get newborns on a schedule just yet. We don't have one yet with Aiden as I just feed him on demand. I've heard that after a few weeks they sort of create their own schedule especially with eating and sleeping. We wake up to feed him every 2.5 hours at night and during the day he sometimes can go 3 hours before waking up. I'm not sure if twins are different with scheduling but if you're able to set one up, please do share.

ultratomato · January 2017

Thanks ladies I won't rush the schedule for them I guess but they are pretty good about waking up every 2.5 to 3 hours. And the app I have for feeding and bowel movements really helps me keep track of both babies since it gets confusing at night. So my MIL came into town to help us with the babies but I'm trying to maintain my patience because of course she gives her opinions which I expected from my in laws and my parents. And she keeps telling me you can't spoil a baby at this age and if the baby makes a noise she insist on picking up and when we tell her no she says oh mom or dad don't want me to pick u up. Same with the feedings if we say that one has to wait s little longer she tells them the same thing that mom or dad doesn't want you to eat yet yet. So frustrating I mean I appreciate her help since I'm not suppose to pick up the girls even though I do. Oh and another thing my parents have told us from the beginning that they would watch the babies when I go back to work well yesterday they told us that they can only do two days a week since it's a lot of work for them. So now DH and I need to find a daycare see if it makes sense for me to work or quit my job. I wasn't mad at my parents just upset because we wouldn't of bought a new car and finished part of our basement for DHs office if we knew we had to pay for daycare. But now we can't turn back time it's just fustrating. I wouldn't mind being a stay at home mom at all but it just wasn't something we were thinking about. Sorry for the vent ladies

tvh1982 · January 2017

I know the feeling @jerseygirl856, I actually sleep with the clothes she was wearing during the day!
It was our second night apart and it seems that she sleeps better, I soon follow I hope.
Must admit that I look forward to the night bottle as I've missed her #crazymum

Never really understood why people need to comment on how you do things with your babies.
Definitely get why you are annoyed @ultratomato.
And this is the place to vent, so vent away!
That sucks big time that they changed their minds. Understandable as they might have mis calculated the amount of extra work two takes, but definitely not less annoying. You need to re-count all, and you've literally got your hands full.
Hope you find a balance that works for all.

Im glad I don't need to look for daycare just yet, even now I should ask for a break as I probably need a few extra hours of sleep I don't want to. It means not having her close.
My dad wants me to visit and stay over as Pia isn't a fan of driving. He says I could sleep upstairs in the spare bedroom and my stepmom can take care of Pia downstairs. (as she lost half a leg, she can't take Pia up or down the stairs)
Shes a lovely woman, and pretty sure she'd do a great job, but I'm not ready, so haven't visited my dad yet. (He has seen Pia, and he can visit me, but he has ptsd and prefers being at home)
Even thinking about it makes me want to pick her up out of her crib and cuddle. (Which she probably wouldn't mind as she's awake, but so peacefully awake and I need a shower before the show starts again

)

Griffin5413 · January 2017

@ultratomato I'm sorry about your parents! That's a big adjustment that you definitely weren't anticipating. I also totally understand the feeling of appreciating your inkaws help but also wanting them to let you make the decisions without giving all of their input.
@tvh1982 I am right there with you on knowing you need a break but also not wanting to miss the baby. I knowv would probably really do well to have some quality sleep but I also have a hard time letting anyone else help.

capps42613 · January 2017

@ultratomato what a huge bummer! For 4 days a week, daycare is going to cost us $200/wk.

mskeenan · January 2017

@ultratomato I'm so sorry about your parents and in laws causing y'all stress . I would be frustrated too having to change plans for childcare . I know you will make the best decision for you and your family whatever you decide to do - but i know either decision is stressful . Hang in there . You are doing a great job just try to let any negative comments slide . I know that's easier said than done . I'm trying to learn to do that myself as I get a lot of unwanted comments that feel so critical of my ability to take care of my son .

@tvh1982 I feel you on being torn about needing a break . I haven't had a full nights sleep since Vince was born despite my mother in law and husband offering to give Vince a bottle . When my mother in law stayed the night I slept about 5 hours then woke up missing my boy and just had to go see him

I'm starting to wonder when I'll ever sleep again . It's all totally worth it but dang !! It's hard letting other people take care of our babies .

I have an optional lunch work meeting next week that I'm going to go to even though I'm still on leave . It's not a long meeting and I'm gonna go just to practice going back to work , lol . I know I'm being ridiculous but I feel like I need to practice . Im still trying to figure out how much I'm going to work since I choose how many patients I take on

tvh1982 · January 2017

Noooooooooo! It's been 5hrs between feeding, and Pia is sleeping for almost 4 hours after hardly sleeping earlier.
which would be fantastic if it was night!
Its only 20:30, and I could have slept with her..but who goes to bed at 16:00!
Hope she does sleep at night!
I did put her on her tummy on a feeding pillow (I know, NOT recommended) next to me in her playpen as she was bitchy all day and loved laying like that on me...so I created me. (And close by I can keep checking she's ok.)
Im so getting punished for this this night!

mskeenan · January 2017

@tvh1982 you never know . Vince has had some days where he has slept a long stretch like that during the day and he still slept at night . Hoping tonight she continues to rest

and I've put Vince on his tummy too when he's super fussy .. I just stay awake and watch him bc I'm paranoid and been told so many times "back is best " . They love their tummies !! He sleeps so much better that way

Griffin5413 · January 2017

@tvh1982 & @mskeenan Eli sleeps better on his stomach too! He loves to sleep laying on my chest. I'm terrified to leave him on his stomach without me right there though. Hopefully Pia sleeps well tonight!

Tulips29 · January 2017

@ultratomato gotta love all that unsolicited advice! My in laws are notorious for it. I like them, they are great people, but man I want to tell them to leave me alone. They also live 20 mins away, so they come visit us constantly and each visit comes with advice on how to raise my child, what to do, how to dress him, etc. It drives me crazy! Luckily my husband told them to chill out a bit so hopefully they'll back off.

@tvh1982 I hope Pia has a good night ahead and you are able to rest as well! 4-5 hour stretches of sleep sound so good right now!

Jerseygirl856 · January 2017

@tvh1982 I can understand not being ready to be away from Pia. I think we feel more calm knowing our babies are right next to us and we can actually see they are ok. When you feel ready for a break, you will know. I'm still not comfortable leaving Leigh alone with her father. I know he's capable of taking care of her but i feel much more at ease doing everything despite being tired. This might be the beginning of Pia sleeping for longer hours. Fingers crossed.
@mskeenan I think practice is good especially if it helps ease the anxiety. I was in panic mode thinking about leaving her for those long work hours. Thankfully it's getting easier as days go by. Do whatever you need to help with the transition.

ultratomato · January 2017

@Tulips29 my in laws live in Florida and she is leaving on or around the 29th of this month I like them but your right they all give advice which is annoying some good and some just what they like to do. And I'm totally against pacifiers and of course she was like give it to them and now I'm arguing with DH about the babies don't need them and she keeps saying it's ok they can be taken away later and I'm like u won't be here when we take them away and they are upset about it. And every time they make a noise she wants to pick them up and I'm short with her every time and say leave them be and let them fuss. I think advice from my parents I can take but it's harder when it's not your parents if that makes sense.
@tvh1982 hopefully pia sleeps through the night I look forward to that with the girls hopefully they can be on the same schedule to sleep. We try to keep their feedings a half hour apart so one person can feed during the night while the other sleeps which allow some us about 5 hours of sleep a night

tvh1982 · January 2017

Pia did wonderful. Woke up 21:15 and back to sleep at 21:45. I skipped bathing her as I was afraid I would wake her too much.
Joined her for a sleep as I was unsure how the night would be. She slept 4 hours, had a bottle, another 4 hours and then a whooping 3 to finish it!
And I slept all of them too

She even been a trooper in the car (she hated it before) she closed her eyes!!
This girl!

I do have a question though:
Pia doesn't always cry for food at night.
She did at 01:45...it was a I need food NOW cry. But the one at 5 she didn't cry. She just wakes me as she's sucking her hands and making small noises. Gave her a dummy and it was quiet again for 20 min, then the sucking and slightly moaning noises started again. After a little bit I went to get her and gave her a bottle, which she really is ready for.
Just wonder if I should ignore her there, as she didn't cry for it. (She has those at night mostly. No crying, just letting me know she's hungry with other noises)
Should I only go feed her if she cries for it, or also feed her when she obviously is hungry yet doesn't cry for it?

mskeenan · January 2017

I have the same question @tvh1982 been wondering the same thing ! Glad you got some good sleep ! Last night was rough for me .. slept 1-2 hours at a time . Hubby has the flu so he has been banished upstairs . Poor guy . I'm really hoping Vince and I don't get it !!!

Griffin5413 · January 2017

@tvh1982- I have always read that crying is their last resort. They give all of the other ques before they cry. I try to get Eli before the cry bc it's easier to get him back to sleep.

@mskeenan - we are still every 3 hours too. I even tried giving him more formula and he's still up and dues t drink all of it. DH is in school and working full time so he's pretty much no help during the week. He feels terrible but I keep telling him he needs sleep more than I do.

tvh1982 · January 2017

That actually makes sense @Griffin5413, that it's their last resource.
I'll keep doing what I do

Ive started to get to know when to go get her before it's out of hand.
She does still have her scare cries, they hurt my heart, as she's really scared and upset. They start full on, and you see me running upstairs. That's the only cry I don't even try comforting her while she stays in bed. That's a pick her up and smother her with love.

its tough with the 1-2 hours sleep. Hope Vince just had night off and gives you more sleep.
I feel for you ladies that have the night shifts on your own, specially with the short nights. Hope Vince and Eli will be nice boys and start giving you 4 to 5 hours!

Tulips29 · January 2017

@tvh1982 I do the same thing @Griffin5413 does. I set my alarm at night for every 2 hours and 45 mins which gives me about 15 mins to wake up and warm his bottle and get to him before he starts crying. I also find it easier with getting him back to sleep that way. He also hates diaper changes and cries each time. So if he's well fed before he gets upset the diaper changes aren't such a scream-fest

ultratomato · January 2017

Ok ladies need to vent again my MIL just called one of the babies the other one instead of calling them by name. I told her that I didn't like it and her excuse was that she can't remember who is who. My girls are not identical and don't look a like. This rubs me the wrong way and I'm not sure I can keep my mouth shut if she says it again.

Griffin5413 · January 2017

@ultratomato - that sounds so frustrating! I guess I could understand if they were identical but that's not an excuse. This might be a conversation DH needs to have with them since it could be a little sensitive. Are they in town much longer or can you just keep it inside a few days to keep the peace?

mskeenan · January 2017

@ultratomato ugh that is super annoying . I agree with @griffin5413 can your DH say something or is she leaving soon ? MIL relationships can be so tricky !!

mskeenan · January 2017

Saw this and it made me laugh . So true . Hang in there mamas !!

New Mamas - Pregnant after IF graduates : random thread

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