Sip and See

michaela0704 · January 2017

Alright... I had never heard of these things, never been invited to one, but I would love to do this!!

Anyone planning on having a Sip and See? When will you do it (age of baby)?

Anyone done one before and want to share any lessons learned?

I do not, and mean absolutely do NOT, want any gifts but would love to have a time to have all my close family and friends come over to meet our little one as well as give our boys an opportunity to share in some of the attention as being new big brothers!

Wino0920 · January 2017

This is what I am doing. My group of friends wouldn't let up on a shower so I agreed to this, after they explained it to me. They are planning so I really don't have any details but my rule was NO GIFTS!! Lol! I'm sure as it gets closer, they will have to run the date by me and stuff but all I know now is that's the plan.

michaela0704 · January 2017

@Wino0920 I'm the first of my very close friends to be in my 2nd pregnancy so I think some might be in cahoots trying to plan a sprinkle/shower but I really don't want that so... I think a Sip and See will be a better option and I like the purpose much better.

ellie111227 · January 2017

I think it is a cool idea, and I would be excited to go to one for a friend. I get really paranoid about germs for like the first 3-4 months, so it would stress me out too much to have one myself, but I don't think that's ready a reasonable fear, just my own personal neurosis. I'm sure some people will still bring you small gifts, just like some do when they come over to visit after a new lo is born, but as long as you don't register publicly or have a big organized gift opening time at the party, I think it's fine. Just be prepared that that will probably happen someeven though it's not your goal.

keniialise · January 2017

My friends adopted a baby and had a sip and see, their only requirement was that all guests in attendance had to have their pertussis (dTap) vaccine up to date. And then of course a big bottle of hand sanitizer when you walk in the door! Highly recommend those

mamaelle27 · January 2017

I love the idea of a sip and see. It gets all the visits out of the way instead of a constant stream of visitors. However, as a FTM, I was very nervous about letting people touch my baby. I tried very hard to keep visits to my inner circle of family and friends for like 6 weeks. As a STM, I'm still worried about germs but realizing this is probably going to be very impractical. My toddler has a life and I'm assuming after the first couple of weeks we'll need to see her friends and resume her activities. STMs, how did you balance the baby's health and the toddler's needs as far as who visited and where you went?

michaela0704 · January 2017

I guess I was careful but not super careful about germs... I didn't want/let strangers touch my boys but I did take them in to my office to meet my team/have a group lunch when they were a month old... I have pictures of some of the women I'm close to from work even holding/loving on them.

I was thinking ~ 6 weeks old for a formal sip and see... I've read some people do it at 2 weeks but I think that would be too hard on me and risky for a baby.

I'll ask everyone to wash hands, then sanitize if they want to hold him... also, ask folks to stay away if they are sick. Otherwise I think I'm fine with it.

Elyse1384 · January 2017

My SIL wanted to throw one when I had my DD (I think more just for herself to finally have a "pink party"), but a mere 2-3 weeks after I delivered. Hell to the no! I personally am too lazy to want to deal with parties when tending to a newborn so I nixed the idea quickly, but I think if done properly could be cute/fun. Here's an idea... what if you have a photo frame where guests could write well wishes for the new baby which could later be used for any newborn photos? We did that at our wedding and used it with one of our pics and it is one of our favorite things to go back and read! I imagine that might be a cute keepsake for a LO to see all the love from family/friends.

michaela0704 · January 2017

The more I read up on these things and look for invitations... they are all showing up under baby showers... ugh, I don't want to be perceived to be throwing myself my own baby shower for DS3!

The other thought, we've never had a formal get together for the house we've been slowly renovationg... and it will be my birthday when DS3 is about 6w old... so maybe we won't call it a sip and see but I'll just have a small party at the house where I know the purpose but it doesn't have to be something labeled 'Sip and See'...

Unknown · January 2017

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mamaelle27 · January 2017

@michaela0704- If only people would actually stay away when they are sick! I twice had issues with my DH's family not understanding this and making me seem like a crazy person. Once when my DD was about ten days old I had a big fight with his mom because his dad had a really bad cold and I wouldn't let her come over, and again when she was a little older and his sister was like, "I'm sick but don't worry I'm only touching the baby's hands". Um where do you think she puts her hands?! Do not come over my house if you (or anyone in your house) are sick. End story.

Xath · January 2017

@mamaelle27 With toddlers around your younger babies are never going to be as insulated as your firstborn. Toddlers are gross and they're fast. At some point they will kiss/slobber/draw/pour things all over your newborn. My oldest was also in daycare and brought who knows what germs home, and DS2 was immune compromised. In the beginning, we changed DS1's clothes and wiped him down as soon as he got home from daycare. We couldn't really do much more.

abmommy15 · January 2017

I've been thinking about doing a sip and see but struggle with how to get the no gifts request across without sounding like I'm assuming people were going to bring a gift . If you specify no gifts does that make people roll their eyes and think "I wasn't going to get a gift anyway"?

DewyK · January 2017

I think I'm in the minority, but sip and sees aren't for me. Simply because I already don't like passing my babies around, and having lots of people over means lots of baby passing. It stresses me out. I'd much rather have one or two friends over at a time.

Totally just a personal preference, though!

ladylolly89 · January 2017

DewyK said:

I think I'm in the minority, but sip and sees aren't for me. Simply because I already don't like passing my babies around, and having lots of people over means lots of baby passing. It stresses me out. I'd much rather have one or two friends over at a time.

Totally just a personal preference, though!

I absolutely agree! I myself would have to do a lot of sipping to survive that kind of gathering.

Wino0920 · January 2017

abmommy15 said:

I've been thinking about doing a sip and see but struggle with how to get the no gifts request across without sounding like I'm assuming people were going to bring a gift . If you specify no gifts does that make people roll their eyes and think "I wasn't going to get a gift anyway"?

It sucks, but no matter what, people are going to bring gifts. You can donate them to a children's hospital or to needy children. Or return them and use the credit later for something you do need.

If I were to send the invite out myself, I would not mention gifts, registry, etc at all. I don't think specifying makes people roll their eyes, because even if they weren't, they know other's would.

krex-2 · January 2017

This is what I think we plan on doing, since the idea of shower prior to the adoption just seems odd to me. I'm thinking at the 6 week mark, we'll probably do something like that (my best friend wants to host it).

lmudra · January 2017

krex said:

This is what I think we plan on doing, since the idea of shower prior to the adoption just seems odd to me. I'm thinking at the 6 week mark, we'll probably do something like that (my best friend wants to host it).

This is what we did. We were matched after birth but even if we had been matched for months before hand I couldn't have a baby shower for a baby who isn't mine. Just feels icky when I hear of AP's that do this. It was actually nice doing it after bc everyone got to meet him all at once so we didn't have as many visitors to the house.

ellie111227 · January 2017

@krex I think a sip n see is great if it's what you prefer, but I have been to a couple showers for adoptive moms and no one has found it weird at all. You are still becoming a mother, you still have friends who want to celebrate that with you and give you gifts as you prepare for your little one, so I don't see what would be different from anyone else in this case. As I think about it, actually the only adoptive moms I know who didn't have showers were stms (like my own mom, since the oldest of us is biological and she had already had a shower when she adopted). I say if someone offers and you think it would be fun, go for it!

shmarpler · January 2017

We didn't really have a sip and see, but we usually go out to eat every Monday night with friends, so our first Monday night home, they brought us dinner instead. It was two families, and they didn't stay long, so it was nice to see them, and enjoy a bit of "normal life" while the baby was still new. I know some people don't want others around a newborn, but I didn't mind, especially since all of the kids were taken to the bathroom to clean up before they touched DD.

KB00 · January 2017

I love the idea of a sip and see but I remember when my son was born, ALL of my family and extended family came over to see him for the first time (just to see my son and visit with me - not an official sip and see). I loved it for about thirty minutes. Then I really wanted everyone to leave because I was just so exhausted. I feel like I'd prefer small doses of family and spread out the visits to make it more manageable.

kahlan82 · January 2017

I had never heard of a sip and see until this thread. I am with @DewyK. I would be too anxious about germs.

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