Miscarriage after IVF

elisam511 · January 2017

We are all on this board because of loss, and I am so so so very sorry to each one of you reading this. You are not alone in this struggle.

I am wondering if there are others who had suffered a miscarriage after doing IVF specifically? I have DOR and we were successful in getting pregnant with our first round of IVF, but unfortunately suffered a miscarriage at 9weeks. I've never been more devastated in my life.

I had the D&C in december and just finished my first period yesterday, so I am hopefully and anxiously looking forward to the next round of IVF. I see and hear about all these women who are successful in having a baby after a miscarriage... supposedly we are more 'fertile' after a miscarriage, but I just can't seem to wrap my brain around that concept for ME.... My issue is not uterine, its more the fact that I am running out of eggs and have low antral follicles.... Anway, just wanted to see if there was anyone else in the same boat as me.... Also, if you can share your thoughts on doing another round of IVF or not? Sigh....

I documented my journey on YouTube. Please watch, and thank you! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCqLRjZ6tkRGcNhJUo5Ehn0g

rklinge0 · January 2017

I am sorry for your loss. Have you checked out the ttcal boards, there may be someone on there that has experience?
I have heard different things about ivf and helping you conceive naturally the next time. I worked with a man whose wife had ivf the first time and had 3 other children without help. So it could be worth a try but honestly it's your preference. Maybe someone else would have more insight.

c-town18 · January 2017

*M/C and pregnancy mentioned*

I am so sorry, elisam511. Yes, I'm in a similar situation as you. 35 y.o., AMH .6, had never been pregnant before, did a few IUIs with no luck. Got pregnant the first round of IVF with twins, heard both heartbeats at 7 week u/s, we were so excited, then went back for 8 week u/s in late September and both heartbeats had stopped at around 7 1/2 weeks. After a second confirmatory u/s a few days later (since I was in complete shock and denial), I took misoprostol at home, had a terrible reaction to it, and my DH ended up taking me to the emergency room and I was there all night miscarrying the two. Worst experience of my life. The only good that came of that night is that the OB in the ER was able to collect both fetuses and we sent them in for testing. Both had a fatal trisomy, so we at least know the reason for the miscarriage and that was helpful moving forward.

We did a second round of IVF in December, and I am currently 6 1/2 weeks pregnant with a singleton. Haven't heard the heartbeat yet, I go in for 7 week u/s on Wednesday, and we are really not allowing ourselves to get excited early this time because we emotionally cannot go through that again.

A few factors went into our decision to do another round of IVF so quickly. 1) State law in Illinois requires insurance to cover the bulk of the expense for IVF for up to 4 tries, and I don't know how long we will stay here, so I wanted to take advantage of the covered attempts while I could. 2) This whole process had made me feel like I have no control since for the most part I can't control how my body responds to the meds, how many follicles I have, how the embryos grow or don't, etc., and the decision to move forward with another cycle at least felt like I was being proactive and in control of that decision if that makes sense. 3) Timing-wise, I just didn't want to wait if the RE said we were clear to try another round which he did.

Anyways, not sure if this helps but just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you and you are not alone. The jury's still out on whether I will be a success story, but I did quickly get pregnant again so hopefully that gives you some hope too. Let me know if you have any questions.

Luckyu317 · January 2017

Lurking from TTCAL. **TW, loss mentioned** I'm so sorry for your loss. I didn't have a MC, but I did suffer a loss at 17 weeks. They were IVF twins. It was our first IVF cycle; we fertilized 4 eggs, and transferred in two. We are in the beginning stages of prepping for our second round of IVF, a frozen embryo transfer. I hope you can find peace in whatever you decide to do.

elisam511 · February 2017

@Luckyu317 how are you doing?

rainbowwishes5 · February 2017

I'm sorry for your loss. We lost 2 a couple weeks ago via IVF. We have no other embryos so it's back to full IVF again and not just (basically an easy by comparison) FET. But this too SOUL SEARCHING and I'm still not sure it's the right idea but I'm grasping at straws. Meds are paid for. We'll see what happens. I hold out zero hope. But I have to be able to say I tried everything so that I can live w myself. This is the pits.

bump steph · February 2017

Hi! I am a lurker but read your post and wanted to reach out. I was in a similar situation. Did a fresh round of IVF (male infertility factor) and transferred 2 fresh day 3 embryos. One stuck, but I miscarried the other at 9 weeks. A few months later we did a FET (we froze two but bc I got pregnant the first time and our fertility problem was male they felt fine only transferring one). The one FET we transferred is now 7 months old and sleeping in her crib! Hang in there. It's so hard, but as my Dad once said: there's nothing better to fight for. You can absolutely have success. My nurse said it was an excellent sign to get pregnant first time around even though it ended in M/C. Good luck!!

elisam511 · February 2017

Thank you so much!!!!

JESSABER0414 · February 2017

Hello - This is one board I didn't want to have to join, but I'm ready to talk to ladies in my situation and of course, hear success stories if possible.
I'm currently going through a natural miscarriage after our very first FET resulting in our very first pregnancy, lost at 5W3D. Really, to cope it's easier to know it never developed into what would be the baby, only a gestational sac that split into 2, then never developed the yolk sac. Needless to say, we are devastated. 2017, yet again another year in which we will not become parents, it's a sad concept. I hope to move forward, but don't think I'll ever move past this.
We have 11 frozen embryos, so there is hope for a successful transfer and pregnancy, but it's difficult to think that this won't happen again and again.
Hope everyone is taking care and feeling a little stronger each passing day.

Hugs to all.

rainbowwishes5 · February 2017

@JESSABER0414 if I had 11 (11?!?!????!!!???) embryos I would be ridiculously positive one would be good. The most I will ever have in my lifetime won't likely exceed 5-6 so you are in excellent shape. I'm shocked.

JESSABER0414 · March 2017

@rainbowwishes5 Yes, I'm positive one is the one. I know we r very fortunate to have numbers on our side. I will never do a stim and retrieval again, I did poorly during and after retrieval. I'm hoping to trust the pros at picking which to use next. Lots of uncertainty because it could be quantity over quality.

laurenray91 · December 2017

Hey there,

Similar experience.. We were pregnant after our first IVF round, and miscarried around 6 weeks. It's been 6 months and I am still devastated. I have PTSD, along with depression and anxiety. I wish I had the money to try again, but I don't (In Ontario, first round of IVF is free, but after that you pay, and there are no benefits from work or insurance that can cover it). I think the helplessness I feel is contributing to all of my mental health. We're hoping to try again in Summer 2018, but in the mean time I have so many moments where I simply cry thinking about how close we were to having our own baby.

Where I live, the nearest fertility clinic is over an hour away. There are no support groups, to help me out either. So I'm very grateful we can stick together and have eachother's backs.

Wishing everyone well.

rita340 · December 2017

So sorry for your loss. I had two MCs and both after IVF. At last I gave birth after the third attempt. I almost lost my hope. I really appreciate my husband for his help and support. He assured me to try it one more time. That’s why we have our little baby boy now. He is a great kid.

I know a lot of women, who also tried the IVF but unsuccessfully. That’s why I know what you are talking about. Infertility is a huge problem nowadays. I’m very sorry that a lot of women have to cope it without any support. It is really hard.

I wish you good luck, dear. I’m sure you will succeed soon. Just, please, don’t give up. Everything will be fine.

roisis · January 2018

I'm so sorry for your loss. I too have gone through a similar experience: TTC for 6 years, finally did IVF early last year, had OHSS so had to freeze - only got one good embryo and then 'low and behold' a BFP in May 2017. It was only when we saw the heartbeat at 7wks that we got really excited - probably the happiest moment of my life. Then it just all ended at 9 weeks. I had a complete m/c so no d&c but I was in hospital and that night still gives me nightmares.

I know what you mean about everyone stating that you are 'more fertile' after a m/c and most women want to get pregnant again asap - but this is so much harder if you are already dealing with IF. Actually getting pregnant after all these years was a miracle to me - having it snatched away just seemed so unfair. My RE advised me to wait a while until I felt emotionally ready to deal with another round of IVF - but this is a personal - and there may be reasons to push ahead again quickly. Personally, at the time, I felt that there was no way I could go through any of this again and I was ready to close the door on it all. But after a few months I began to focus on the happiness that I felt in getting pregnant, and for me I now feel ready to try that again. I'm preparing for my second round of IVF this month.

Does your IVF clinic offer any counselling/emotional support? I found that to be very helpful - if you can find any such support it may help. Talking to strangers can be very therapeutic!

The very best of luck to you if you do decide to go ahead and try again. There is a very supportive IVF community that you could consider joining too - so many strong women sharing their experiences with these issues.

All the best xxx

nancythorne · February 2018

I also just recently had a mc at 14 weeks after a FET. We had done a fresh cycle prior but it didn't work, as well as 3 iui cycles, and TTC naturally on and off for 2 years. This was my first pregnancy and not an easy one to begin with as I had placental detachment at 6 weeks and was on bedrest for a month. Everything looked good, but a month after that, I had a mc (Jan 7, 2018). It's been really hard because so many people knew as it seemed like we had already been through the worst and I had to give an explanation for my bedrest. I miscarried naturally most of it (very traumatically) and had a couple rounds of cytotec too.

I think I am about to get AF and my RE wants to do a sonohysterogram so I guess we are out this coming cycle, but I think we would like to try again after that. We still have a couple of frozen embryos. Our infertility problems are unexplained. I'm 29 and dh is 35.

I found it comforting to hear your stories (as much as I can find comfort in sharing such a horrible experience).Does anyone know any other boards I might find support from?

roisis · February 2018

nancythorne I'm so sorry for you loss. Losing at 14wks must be so tough - particularly after all you have been through

I've found the infertility boards here are very helpful. If you go ahead with an FET you may find them comforting. There are generally threads for FETs for every month so you can find a group that has the same timeline as you. Many of the women there have suffered through losses, and it can be very comforting to talk openly with people who have had similar experiences.
Best of luck in the future

cheerfulboots23 · February 2018

@nancythorne Definitely keep a supportive group community here on TheBump. You'd be surprised how many people can relate and can be so open-minded to listen. I'll be praying!!

nancythorne · February 2018

Thank you for the replies. I appreciate it and will check those suggestions out

northbeach3 · March 2018

i realize it's been several weeks since the last post, but I find myself on my lunch break feeling aimless and alone.

I just had my second u/s this morning at 9w1d and did not hear a heartbeat after hearing one at 7w1d. RE said growth stopped at 8w3d. i have a D&C tomorrow.

I really haven't experienced much emotion b/c I had to come to work today... but also feeling a little empty inside. I thought something might be up last week but and have generally tried to reserve any excitement b/c the IVF / infertility process has been so taxing. at the moment, i'm not feeling too much and i feel bad about that. honestly, my heart hurts more for my husband who seems devastated.

i haven't really begun to process it or the next steps. although we have 5 frozen embryos, we hadn't done PGS testing... so i assume we'll now need to get them tested before moving forward. and now that brings more fear and worry.

anyway, sorry for the stream of consciousness... just had to get something down. my heart goes out to all of you.

Mack2342 · March 2018

@northbeach3 so sorry for your loss. This is a difficult process take care of yourself

elisam511 · March 2018

@northbeach3 my heart goes out to you!!! Sending you a great big hug - please promise you wont lose hope!!!! Even in this darkest moment, please believe there is a tiny little light inside your heart that KNOWS this will happen for you!!!

rozpre · October 2018

This convo seems dusty, but I’m having a hard time grasping this MC (my 2nd) because this time was not natural...we did IVf and tested the embryos for chromosomal issues. It’s super frustrating. I am on lovenox for a blood clotting disorder and levothyroxine for hypothyroid. I am worried that we will have the same issues with our future FET. SIGH...

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