Taking baby out

jkb972 · December 2016

We've taken our little one out when we've run a few errands. Have you taken yours out much yet? I'm nervous that he'll just spend most of the time crying. I haven't had to nurse in public yet and I'm nervous to do so too.

rspalding001 · December 2016

I've taken mine to the park and the grocery store. I keep him in the baby Katan sling for the most part. I have to bring him with me to day care pick up too which means exposing him to 15 toddlers ha ha, ack! Toddler germs! So again I keep him in the sling. I nursed him in the waiting room at the Dr office, no big deal.

kristah2 · December 2016

We take baby everywhere!! His first outting he was a week old, just to my moms. But then at 10 days we did Costco and never looked back. We do 2 grocery stores every week. We're always our Christmas shopping etc. At least 3-4 times a week minimum! weve even gone out to supper with him 3 times! I find the car puts him to sleep. We then just take out his seat and put it in a cart or take the stroller depending on where we are, he's perfect. We can get anywhere around 3-4 hours with him.
Only once did we have an issue and we knew because the car didn't put him to sleep so we didn't even try it. If he falls asleep we're golden!
I say go for it. Don't let baby hold you back!
For the record, it's been almot 6 weeks and I haven't breast fed in public at all so just work with baby! I usually get ready then get him ready and do a really good feed so he's good and sleeps solid

MrsBigTime · December 2016

jkb972 said:

We've taken our little one out when we've run a few errands. Have you taken yours out much yet? I'm nervous that he'll just spend most of the time crying. I haven't had to nurse in public yet and I'm nervous to do so too.

I've been out a lot, but LO is always in a carrier of some sort. It's the best way to keep her calm and away from the germ factories that flare other people!

Practice using your cover at home before you use it out, just to give you some peace of mind. I also spent a lot of time nursing in the car when DD1 was new and I wasn't ready to NIP.

SandNStarsNJ · December 2016

It's nice to hear all these experiences. While I have no problem NIP, I am presently paranoid about him getting sick. With our first it was June so going out was different.

That said, DS is 8 days old today and we went to a Christmas tree farm and visited with friends in their farmhouse. No one was allowed to hold him, but I did need to pull him out of his carrier because he was hungry. So, of course, our first outing resulted in me nursing in public.

Opinion Question: My in laws have a big holiday party every year. There are roughly 20-30 people. DS will be 16 days old - is it a bad idea to take him? I don't want to but am wondering if I am overreacting. I should mention that everyone will want to hold him and they really suck at taking "no" for an answer.

MrsMaryK2016 · December 2016

I just took him to the office to help put up the office Christmas tree and it was basically a disaster. He cried a lot and nursed three times in the two hours we were there. Although to be fair, he's had issues with gas and belly pain which he can't help so I doubt it's the being out that's causing the issue.

@SandNStarsNJ I'm facing the same dilemma. My LO will be about 5 weeks old at that point but still so little. My MIL said my SIL brought my nephew when he was just two weeks old and he stayed in the guest room with an aunt or my MIL and no one else was allowed in. She said everyone else understood and cooperated so it shouldn't be an issue but it still makes me nervous. A gassy baby is hard enough, I do not need a sick one.

kvruns · December 2016

We've gone a few places but he stays in the car seat and I make sure there are bottles - I'm not prepared to try to nurse

H and I are having a debate about car seats in shopping carts. He thinks it is perfectly safe to put it across the cart and I say no bc it only hooks in on one side, the other rests on the edge of the cart but seems very unstable. He thinks I'm being paranoid bc he sees it all the time. I'm like well you used to see it but not much anymore

kristah2 · December 2016

@kvruns I put the whole seat in the basket. Not much room for shopping but it's definitely safer!

kvruns · December 2016

kristah2 said:

@kvruns I put the whole seat in the basket. Not much room for shopping but it's definitely safer!

That's what i want to do too.

PrettyPalomino · December 2016

Baby is 12 days old, we've gone to the mall 3 times (stroller) and the grocery store once (moby carrier), two trips to the doctor, plus we took her to grandparents house today. When I tell people we went out they respond with shock and make me feel kinda guilty that I'm exposing her to the germs of the world during flu season... so of course I'm not sure if I'm doing the right thing but I know it feels amazing to go about life as usual and I think it does more good than harm. But I do have mixed emotions about the risk I take in doing so. I just think it's good to get out while DH is off work, to help boost my confidence so I can feel good to do it alone.

i nursed in public for the first time in the elevator lobby at the doctors office, it's hard to get her to latch when I can't see perfectly under the shawl but otherwise I don't care what people think

SandNStarsNJ · December 2016

MrsMaryK2016 said:

*snip*
I'm facing the same dilemma. My LO will be about 5 weeks old at that point but still so little. My MIL said my SIL brought my nephew when he was just two weeks old and he stayed in the guest room with an aunt or my MIL and no one else was allowed in. She said everyone else understood and cooperated so it shouldn't be an issue but it still makes me nervous. A gassy baby is hard enough, I do not need a sick one.

This isn't a terrible alternative of you have family that issues self-control and listens to the parents. Unfortunately, my in laws have "baby snatcher" mentality in which they quite literally snatch the child from whomever is holding him because "it's their turn." No asks. And no one acknowledges when you ask them not to. And the most insulting part is that they all have children, but just sort of look at you like "it's your turn to suffer; now give me the baby" even though I've never snatched a child away from anyone is that family. (In fact, my FIL has locked himself in a room to spend more time with a grandchild at a large family function.)

I actually am more comfortable taking him to a store than with all those people at a 2 1/2 weeks. I'm a terrible in law when we have a new baby...

In regards to NIP, I always wear scarf paired with a draped cardigan or loose sweater and a tank that clips to my bra. This way I can pull the tank down on one side and unclip my bra, while leave the top covered by the scarf. The baby covers the front and no one is worse for the view (unless they're really staring). Maybe that will help...

jmama1611 · December 2016

In her first 2 weeks we've only had a few outings and they've been to see family or friends at their homes. Have discreetly nursed while there, although I am okay with nursing in public. I don't make a big show of it, but my son hated being covered and refused bottles of pumped milk so I dress in a way where I don't have tons of skin showing (my preference) and nurse away.

atcwag · December 2016

kvruns said:

We've gone a few places but he stays in the car seat and I make sure there are bottles - I'm not prepared to try to nurse

H and I are having a debate about car seats in shopping carts. He thinks it is perfectly safe to put it across the cart and I say no bc it only hooks in on one side, the other rests on the edge of the cart but seems very unstable. He thinks I'm being paranoid bc he sees it all the time. I'm like well you used to see it but not much anymore

Before I even saw this, I was going to give a friendly PSA of no infant bucket seats on top (seat portion) of cart. It's a big safety risk.

As for outings, we've only done 2. 1 at just under a week old for a pedi appt and another today @ a week and 1/2 to my in-laws for belated Thanksgiving dinner (I preferrred not to go - FIL is a smoker, but I have to pick my battles). I only stayed for about 2 hours and was successfully able to use DS1's nap time as a (real) excuse.
DS1 had some serious health issues, most likely from a communicable virus, when he was 9 weeks old. We were in the hospital 3 weeks, so I'm totally ok shacking up @ home.

jkb972 · December 2016

I agree with you. I put the whole car seat in the cart...I don't trust it resting on top.

BLyn627 · December 2016

We've been a few places, but baby stays in the carrier - covered and away from other people.

@SandNStarsNJ we are missing both of our extended families' Christmas gatherings this year. As much as I hate to, LO will be less than 8 weeks old, and I'm not risking it. Our Pedi is so laid back about everything, but keeping LO away from germs/groups of people (for first 8 weeks) and vaccines are the two things they are pretty strict about. If a baby less than two months old has a fever, it's automatic hospital admittance with the works - spinal tap, catheter, etc... Unfortunately, I know several friends this has happened to with their little and it's not pretty. It's just not something I'm willing to risk especially during cold/flu season.

BLyn627 · December 2016

@kvruns stick to your guns on that one. The top of a shopping cart is not made for car seats. Not only does it make the cart top heavy and likely to tip over, which I've been witness to, but since car seats aren't made to "lock in" there, it can damage the car seat to where it may not work properly in a crash. Ask your DH to do some research to prove its okay to do. He'll see pretty quickly it's not safe at all. My mom and I went back and forth on the coats in a car seat thing and when I asked her to research it and prove it was safe, she quickly found it wasn't and that was that.

MollySm · December 2016

My baby is a week old today, but she's also the youngest of 3. We went out early with all 3 kids though, so maybe it's just our personalities. When she was 4 days old we went to the Home Depot kid's building workshop, got our Xmas tree, and went to Target. 6 days old we went to the mall and saw Santa/got pictures. And that evening I took her out to dinner with a friend who was in town. 7 days old we took her to preschool drop off bc my oldest really wanted us all to go. This coming weekend we have 2 birthday parties. For the most part if H is there he has her in the Ergo, or I am holding her.

SandNStarsNJ · December 2016

We survived the holiday party! DH put a you can look but not touch rule on everyone but DS great grandfather and grandparents and everyone respected the boundaries - with the exception of my FIL not washing his hands.

When we we told everyone he had failed the blood screening for autoimmune deficiencies they seemed to get our hyper precautions.

kvruns · December 2016

I've realized I'm afraid to take him out on my own. Doesn't help it's cold and a little snowy so easier to just stay in but subconsciously I know it's bc H has done all the car seat stuff thus far and I'm afraid of doing something wrong

SandNStarsNJ · December 2016

kvruns said:

I've realized I'm afraid to take him out on my own. Doesn't help it's cold and a little snowy so easier to just stay in but subconsciously I know it's bc H has done all the car seat stuff thus far and I'm afraid of doing something wrong

It can be daunting the first few times but you will feel so much better when you go out alone. Rip the bandaid off!

hollowway · December 2016

I'm still nervous about taking both kids out by myself (3yo and a newborn). So we've been a few places with DH, but I havent put on my big girl panties yet to do it alone. I have Tula carrier that I use when we do go out. Makes wrangling a 3yo easier and keeps people away. Also easy to nurse in. I'm not bashful about NIP at all. I wear a cami/tank top under my tshirt. Pull the t-shirt up, the cami down, latch baby. No boon is shown. And I give zero f***s if me feeding my baby makes people uncomfortable. I'll walk down the aisles at the store shopping with a babe on the breast. Uncovered because covers are stuffy and hot and DD never liked them, so I'm not bothering with DS. I just have to woman up to take them both out in public by myself. DH leaves for training for 18 weeks next month, so I wont have a choice when he's gone.

SandNStarsNJ · December 2016

This morning was our first just me, DD (2.5 yo), and DS (2weeks) outing. It was to the doctor so not entirely overwhelming because of where we were but I think I'm going to need to take more trial runs like that before we do anything too big.

It was nice to get out.

MrsMaryK2016 · December 2016

Just got home from meeting H for lunch. By the time we got to his office LO was awake and wanted to nurse which we did in the car. And then he got a little fussy on the way to the restaurant so H got nervous and chickened out so we ended up at Burger King which wasn't exactly what I was hoping for but oh well! After I dropped H off at work I braved the grocery store and LO was so good. He woke up as we pulled into our driveway. Honestly, I'm exhausted but at least it went better than last time!

PrettyPalomino · December 2016

So I've realized now what's holding me back from taking her out more often. I have a somewhat overwhelming fear that she will cry at a time I can't nurse. Like while on the highway in the car, or while paying at a cash.

She is 3 weeks 2 days, and honestly she never cries, only if I missed hunger cues which I usually don't. I'm barely used to hearing her cry at home, and I'm always fast to get her latched and it stops immediately. I can't imagine her crying for more than a couple of minutes, I literally don't know what she would do, and I'm pretty sure it would destroy me to watch her cry and not be able to address it immediately... I don't even think it's the embarrassment of having a crying baby, but the emotional turmoil of watching her "suffer".

How do you moms get past that? Does it just go away as you get used to them crying more? I guess in a way I am very lucky to have a content baby and technically she hasn't cried once in all of our outings.

SandNStarsNJ · December 2016

PrettyPalomino said:

So I've realized now what's holding me back from taking her out more often. I have a somewhat overwhelming fear that she will cry at a time I can't nurse. Like while on the highway in the car, or while paying at a cash.

She is 3 weeks 2 days, and honestly she never cries, only if I missed hunger cues which I usually don't. I'm barely used to hearing her cry at home, and I'm always fast to get her latched and it stops immediately. I can't imagine her crying for more than a couple of minutes, I literally don't know what she would do, and I'm pretty sure it would destroy me to watch her cry and not be able to address it immediately... I don't even think it's the embarrassment of having a crying baby, but the emotional turmoil of watching her "suffer".

How do you moms get past that? Does it just go away as you get used to them crying more? I guess in a way I am very lucky to have a content baby and technically she hasn't cried once in all of our outings.

I always wanted to solve the crying as soon as it started with my first. And truthfully, still want to even though she's 2. As she gets older you get used to the crying but I admittedly feel the same way about our son now who is only 2 1/2 weeks. You learn to read the cues and you soothe when you can but sometimes they just need to cry it out – especially on those car rides. They will also learn to soothe themselves eventually.

kvruns · December 2016

PrettyPalomino said:

So I've realized now what's holding me back from taking her out more often. I have a somewhat overwhelming fear that she will cry at a time I can't nurse. Like while on the highway in the car, or while paying at a cash.

She is 3 weeks 2 days, and honestly she never cries, only if I missed hunger cues which I usually don't. I'm barely used to hearing her cry at home, and I'm always fast to get her latched and it stops immediately. I can't imagine her crying for more than a couple of minutes, I literally don't know what she would do, and I'm pretty sure it would destroy me to watch her cry and not be able to address it immediately... I don't even think it's the embarrassment of having a crying baby, but the emotional turmoil of watching her "suffer".

How do you moms get past that? Does it just go away as you get used to them crying more? I guess in a way I am very lucky to have a content baby and technically she hasn't cried once in all of our outings.

Mine came out screaming and hasn't stopped LOL but I still have that same fear - probably one reason why I haven't gone anywhere. He just likes to cry for no reason many times and I definitely don't want to deal with the inconsolable child out in public. But I know it will happen and one of these days I just have to deal with it.

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