TTC 15+months, thinking adoption.

sweetp83 · December 2016

Anyone else ever look into adoption? My husband and I have been TTC for over 15 months. I don't know what to do anymore. I had an HSG and lab work done. Everything should be in working condition. Still no baby. Adoption has crossed my mind several times. I have no idea where to start in this process and my husband is on the fence. I need more information. I worry about the cost and we don't have much liquid cash right now. I wouldn't mind fostering to adopt either. Any direction or help would be great!

J1006 · December 2016

My husband and I are also looking into adoption. It's been something we've talked about for about a year. There are so many decisions to make in regards to what kind of adoption to choose.

In terms of cost there are foundations that help with the cost. There are also tax credits and such however you do have to front the cost.

greenange · December 2016

I completely understand your discouragement! We have been trying for close to 3 years with no luck. Adoption frequently crosses my mind. I don't know much about the costs, but I do know that there are tons of children out there that need a loving home. We're still TTC and I believe that we will end up adopting eventually, even if we are successful in making a biological child of our own.

Check your state's adoption website, they seem to have lots of information about financial assistance and different ways to pursue adoption.

MandyBeeSLP · December 2016

We are looking into fostering and adoption. We actually just recently attended a meeting where they covered foster parenting, foster-to-adopt, private and international adoption. It was slightly overwhelming and very informative! Very likely there are agencies in your area that hold imformational meeting occasionally. We were really glad we went because we feel like we know enough to discuss it and make some preliminary decisions if/when we come to that point.

Bababatty · December 2016

Welcome! I'm sorry you're going through this. I don't have any experience with adopting, but I think there is also an Adoption board on the Bump that probably has lots of good info, too. I hope you participate here and there. :-)

sweetp83 · December 2016

Thanks everyone! I thought there was an adoption board. I looked over them several times and missed it every time!

hazelpanda · December 2016

It took me 5 years to conceive and I finally did so through IVF. That said...we were preparing to look into adoption. Usually if you go through the state or local adoption agencies they are low cost. My brother and his wife went this route.... another way to adopt is embryo adoption. where you are implanted through IVF with donor embryos. That way you get the chance to experience pregnancy.

Hang in there and look into all your options! don't give up! Prayers from PA

Vagarcia16 · December 2016

**TW: Children Mentioned**

My husband and I struggled with IF for years. We decided to look into adoption. We decided to pursue adoption through foster care, which is almost no out of pocket costs, however the process of working towards a final adoption can take months, and in some cases, years.

We chose to go through the process of becoming a licensed foster home (which in our state, is required before you can be matched for adoption) while we continued with our fertility treatment. In our final weeks of completing our classes, I became pregnant through IUI.

When I was 8 months pregnant we received a call from a social worker that was looking for a home for a 3 day old infant who was still in the hospital. We took in that sweet angel baby (who is healthy and beautiful!), and now have two precious little ones. They are 6 weeks apart, and thus, we are in the throws of "twin" parenting a miracle baby and an angel baby.

My angel baby, is almost 6 months old and we are FAR from finalizing her adoption. Everything is moving in our favor, however, the court processes drag on and on. The hardest part is being utterly in love with a child, and knowing that there is a chance (however small) that she could be removed from your loving care. It's excruciating, the fear is indescribable. At the end of the day, I would walk through fire for my girl, so any heartache along the way is worth every second of being her mother, I'm so blessed.

Good luck to you! I'm sure you will make whatever decision is best for you and your SO.

funkykey · December 2016

@Vagarcia16 - what a beautiful story! Best of luck with your adoption process, and with raising twins! I cannot imagine bringing home a new baby from the hospital when the other child we had at home was only 6 weeks old - what a wild ride!

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