May 2017 Moms
KMD1106
member
Me:31 DH:32 Married 11/06/10
DD: Born 8/23/13 (clomid+ovidrel+IUI)
BFP 9/9/16 EDD 5/19/17
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Say It Sunday: Open Letters
KMD1106
member
I'm trying to keep it livened up a little on the weekend, so I had this idea. Please let me know if you prefer not to have this on Sundays or at all.
My thought is that we we do open letters on Sunday. It's sort of a place to vent. What do you think? If you like it, let's hear them!
My thought is that we we do open letters on Sunday. It's sort of a place to vent. What do you think? If you like it, let's hear them!
May Siggy Challenge: Labor Memes
Me:31 DH:32 Married 11/06/10
DD: Born 8/23/13 (clomid+ovidrel+IUI)
BFP 9/9/16 EDD 5/19/17
Re: Say It Sunday: Open Letters
Dear Lady at the Grocery Store,
Thank you very much for cutting me off and taking my parking spot. It was very fun to walk from the back of the parking lot with a whiny three year old in the rain.
Sincerely,
One Crabby Mom
Me:31 DH:32 Married 11/06/10
DD: Born 8/23/13 (clomid+ovidrel+IUI)
BFP 9/9/16 EDD 5/19/17
You have a very important job right now, I get it. You're growing because baby is growing. I totally respect your job, I do. But for the love of god, could you please grow upwards a little faster? You're crushing my pelvis. It hurts to sit. It hurts to walk. And this morning, I got stuck in a crouching position and had to awkwardly roll forward onto my belly so I could push myself off the ground (because my husband wasn't there to pull me up this time). So, please, if you could be on your way so I could feel better for a few months before your crushing weight makes my sciatica worse again, I would really appreciate it.
Thanks,
The Rest of Your Body
I understand my hormones are raging and out of whack, but can you please go away so I no longer feel like a teenager popping zits and trying to cover up with makeup?
Thanks,
The vain side of myself
DS1 7/24/15
DS2 5/7/17
I am so happy you have all the energy to run around the store and put things up fast because you want to get out fast, so you can go party with your friends. I want to get home to my 10 year old who has been alone all night. I have also been teaching teenagers all day and now I'm here smiling at annoying customers. I'm exhausted!! Please quit side eyeing this 43 year old pregnant woman who moves slower and has to sit down on occasion. I hope you think of me in 10 years when you are pregnant and exhausted.
Sincerely,
Your geriatric pregnant co-worker
EDD: 06/25/2006 M/C: 11/03/2005
EDD: 04/08/2012 M/C: 09/03/2011
EDD: 12/27/2012 Born Sleeping: 07/19/2012
EDD: 12/07/2013 M/C 05/30/2013 & 05/31/2013
EDD: 07/01/2016 Born sleeping: 03/02/2016
I don't find your dirty jokes very funny. And for you to call me little girl all in the same conversation makes it even more disturbing and awkward. Please grab your groceries and leave.
Sincerely,
The lady who now will now avoid you when you come to shop.
#1 DD Aug 2014 @39weeks via CS
#2 Due May 2,2017 hopeful VBAC
I know it's entirely my fault for over-plucking and the unspeakable years where I shaved you off completely, but if you could just fill in that one empty spot with hair, I would be emmensley greatful.
Sincerely,
Mom with a toddler who apparently has a vendetta against eveybrow makeup
Can you please make up your mind?!?! One day your 90 degrees and the next your raining! But not even a real rain, just a constant light sprinkle. Can you f@$&ing just pour already?
Sincerely,
A mama with a toddler and a continuously runny nose because of the ever-changing weather
When you promise to let the dogs out in the morning, please follow through. I did not enjoy waking up to a bed full of dog pee this morning at 0545...on my day off!
PS the three loads of laundry that followed were the highlight of my day...NOT
Love,
Your tired, pregnant, on-call wife
While I enjoy both of your spunk and typically think it's cute- meal time drama has got to end! Multiple meal options must stop, candy and pirate booty is no an alternative, and hell no you can't have a treat-treat! Eat your damn food!!
Love,
your tired, short-ordered cook mother
Please go to sleep. It's late, and I just want to veg out and watch an adult show. I'm sorry you're having trouble "pushing your poo out," but it'll just have to wait til morning.
Love,
Your tired, frustrated mommy
Me:31 DH:32 Married 11/06/10
DD: Born 8/23/13 (clomid+ovidrel+IUI)
BFP 9/9/16 EDD 5/19/17
I can't imagine what you've been wanting from me since 7am, knowing that you went outside and were fed by your dad at 6. If you think a walk is on today's agenda in the 32degree weather, you've got a whole 'nother thing coming. Please lie down and let me sleep!
Love,
your tired mom on her first day off in over a week.
PS. Thank you for finally lying down... however I should have specified that my shoulder/boob/stomach is not a great spot.
I know you're both traumatized right now. I'm too lazy to give you the attention you want/deserve, and the toddler is all too willing to scoop you up and give you love that you DON'T want. However, if you puke in my house one more time, I'm going to banish you outside....or lock you in a room and lot the toddler love you to death. RIP to my brand new suede boots that I got to wear exactly one time before one of you ninja'd your way into the closet to puke on them this morning.
Love,
Your two legged mother who is tired on spending time on all fours cleaning carpets
Married:09/14/13
Baby 2 - Due: 5/4/17