Need to Vent

wynterwaddell · November 2016

Hey ladies I know this board is about our pregnancies and our babies but I just really need to vent.
Today about 1hr ago I let my two dogs outside to go to the bathroom and I figured that they would be okay for two minutes while I went. Well I went to the bathroom and I came back and called them to come inside and only my German Shepherd mix came so I started calling for my other do which was a beagle basset hound mix and was just the size of a chihuahua, she was the sweetest most loving little dog you could ever possibly find.....well she didnt come so I walked up to the top of my driveway and looked and she was layed out in the middle of the road someone ran her over and killed her and didn't even have the decency to stop and tell me so I called my husband hysterical and crying at work and he tried to calm me down and reassure me that what happened is not my fault because she liked to wander off into the neighbours yard and up by the road anyways and he knew that just like I know it and she always followed her nose and difnt look where she was walking but I still blame myself for everything....

dmontgo · November 2016

Omg I am so sorry!! People can be so terrible and cruel. I know we treat our little Yorkie like he is one of our children so I can absolutely understand the devastation you feel. It is not your fault this happened. Pups have a mind of their own and sometimes their curiosity has heartbreaking consequences. I'm so sorry.

kaitmb88 · November 2016

I am so sorry to hear of this tragedy. I have a 3 year old pup and would be devastated as well. This is definitely not your fault so please don't blame yourself. I hope you can find peace

wynterwaddell · November 2016

Thank you. I don't really know what to do with myself anymore right now. It's so weird not hearing her little paws chasing behind me on the floor and hearing her howl at passing cars and everything. It's heartbreaking and I don't know that I'll be getting anymore dogs for a long time. She was more my husband's dog but these last few days she has been constantly around me and checking up on me lately. He says he isn't mad or upset with me about it and he knows it's not my fault and he's gonna miss her too but I can't help but feel bad and Blane myself. My German Shepherd mix and her have been together since they were tiny puppies and I don't know if he knows what happened yet but he came to me when I came back inside from having to pick her up and sat down in my living room floor he got on my lap and licked the tears off of my face and when I got in the bathtub to try to relax myself so I don't have a nervous breakdown he came and layed on the rug next to the bathtub and slept the whole time and then he sat up and whined and I couldn't help but cry again because that makes me think he knows and misses her too. I don't think I'm gonna be 100% for a while that's for sure.

princesslockness · November 2016

Your pup is in no way your fault. She had a mind of her own, and you can't (and shouldnt have to) supervise every single second.

i hope you guys can find some closure, and remember what a wonderful family memebr she was.

wynterwaddell · November 2016

@Kate08Young I know I shouldn't have to supervise her every second and she did definitely have a mind of her own. She basically did whatever she wanted and didn't pay me any attention but it definitely hurts all the same. She just recently started listening to me better in the past week or two and I'm actually upset that she isn't going to be here to meet our son too. It hurts because all 3 of my dogs were like my children too and I've always been a huge animal person. I just hope that I can start to feel better soon but I don't know. The last dog that I lost was the lab/golden retriever that I had since I was two and that took a lot out of me and I said I wasn't going to get anymore dogs but my husband brought her home and I fell in love with her and couldn't say no.

wynterwaddell · November 2016

@kaitmb88 Thank you. It is definitely a big loss and I'm hoping that I will be able to feel a little bit better soon but I don't know it's probably going to take a while. I also feel bad for my other dog that we've had since they were both puppies he's moping around and acting depressed and staying up under me right now so I know he's upset too.

slartybartfast · November 2016

I read this just after realizing I'd left my dog wandering out front. I'm so so sorry this is such a sad thing

kaitmb88 · November 2016

That breaks my heart to hear. So very sad. I know nothing being said will make the pain go away. Just take care of yourselves

wynterwaddell · November 2016

@kaitmb88 Thank you for your kindness. I really needed that and appreciate it.

wynterwaddell · November 2016

@slartybartfast please watch out for your dog. This is one of the worst things to ever have to deal with hun.

acreight13 · November 2016

I'm so so so sorry to hear this, please know that it is not your fault. I hope that even though we are just a bunch of moms/moms-to-be on the internet that you do know that there are even strangers who understand your heartbreak. Please take care of yourself and love up on your other dog.

"If dogs don't go to heaven when I die I want to go where they are."

Can't remember who said that but it's a favorite of mine. Thinking of you and your husband and your other dog.

wynterwaddell · November 2016

@acreight13 Thank you so much for your kind words and understanding. & I agree with whoever said that. Its hard to lose something you loved so very much. I don't know what I would do if it had of been both of them. I probably would have lost it even worse than I did over just her. She was an amazing and adorable and loveable and sweet and cuddly and it's breaking my heart just walking through my house and not seeing her laying on the couch or in my husband's recliner or hearing her little feet behind me and my other dog is sad and I can tell he's torn up about it too I feel worse for him than anything.

Toller · November 2016

So sorry- things like this are so tough. only time can heal- give yourself grace

yellingbanana · November 2016

Oh :'( I'm sorry. Thats messed up, and in no way your fault. Those bastards.

princesslockness · November 2016

@wynterwaddell I was trying to be supportive, I'm sorry that I didn't convey that very well.

1982Babies · November 2016

Oh no!! I am so sorry. It isn't your fault though.

maamawaabangi · November 2016

So sorry! :'(

wynterwaddell · November 2016

@Kate08Young No I know you were. I was just still hysterical reading through your comment and everything. I definitely do appreciate the support And you guys have helped me to feel a tiny bit better with all the kind And supportive comments. This has been a very long and depressing and exhausting day. & I'm emotionally drained.

wynterwaddell · November 2016

@maamawaabangi Thank you

wynterwaddell · November 2016

@1982Babies Thank you

wynterwaddell · November 2016

@yellingbanana Thank you. I still feel bad but I guess it isn't my fault.

wynterwaddell · November 2016

@Toller Thank you

paulpaw · November 2016

I am so sorry for your loss. We had a beagle that followed her nose and was hit, it was so heartbreaking. Take time to grieve and take care of yourself!

Lisa3379 · November 2016

This is so horrible. I'm so, so sorry.

wynterwaddell · November 2016

@LandJ13 That's exactly what happened to mine. Same breed and everything it's definitely heartbreaking. Thank you for the support

wynterwaddell · November 2016

@Lisa3379 Thank you.

wynterwaddell · November 2016

Hey ladies. I am just letting you all know that I am feeling a little bit better today,im not hysterical or depressed anymore but I'm still very sad and still hurting and in shock but I'm calm and trying to stay calm for myself,my husband,my other dogs and this beautiful baby inside of me. I'm just looking at it like she's in a much better place and she died doing what she liked to do with her nose to the ground probably chasing behind a lizard or a frog or something and one day she will be able to climb my husband's leg again and cuddle up on my lap again one day. She's with all of our other dogs that have passed over the years And I know that they're looking out for her and taking care of her for us, that brings me peace and closure to think of it that way. My husband came home and we layed her to rest for the last time and he said he would buy me some small white fencing to put around her and some flowers and stuff to plant because she loved the area of grass we put her in and the Rose bushes so that's where we put her and I have pictures of her and I'll be able to tell our son about her one day when he will understand because I think she knew he would be here soon but never got the chance to meet him but he will know how amazing of a dog she was. I woke up out of a dead sleep last night and thought I heard her bark and was almost tempted to get up and go look for her but I knew I wouldn't find her. & when I picked her up and wrapped her up yesterday the sun shined little brighter where she was and the wind only blew right above her so I knew she'd went up to heaven. Thank you all for your support and kind words I really needed it.

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