So today at my sons 2 week appt his dr told me he was concerned about me and PPD (due to the questionnaire) so I explained to him that I had sever PPD with my last baby who is 5 now and I have already emailed my psychiatrist about it I just don't want to be on meds because I don't feel comfortable taking them while BF (Zoloft makes me suicidal) and he agreeded for now. But I'm wondering if maybe it's baby blues and not PPD... Have any mamas dealt with baby blues or PPD or are dealing with it now? I'm trying to use my skills I've learned from prior therapy but I feel like I'm failing I just don't want to feel like I'm alone...
Re: PPD/Baby blues
I hope you get relief soon.
Use your past past experience and best judgement to help you decide if what you are feeling now is PPD or not. Either way it's great that you already have a psychiatrist and that's a great resource for you to help you understand what you are feeling now.
Best advice I have is just get out and talk to people so you don't feel alone
Hang in there Mama!
DH goes back to work on Thursday and I don't feel like I'm ready to be alone all day with an infant. On top of that, we have my stepsons this weekend so not only will I have an infant to take care of but I'm also going to have them here and they tend to not behave well for me when DH is not home. I'm probably going to have my MIL here to help which will be a whole other level of complicated for me but I least she will help keep my stepsons from being uncontrollable.
Ultimately I'm pretty anxious about this weekend and I just want to lock myself in my room with Vincent and cry.
I'm a STM and with my first, I had the baby blues BAD. It didn't help that my husband had no clue what to say or do to help me, and I just felt incredibly alone. I remember the feelings of inadequacy, and feeling like I had made a huge mistake by having a baby.
Your feelings are all entirely normal and often expected when you're dealing with a huge life change, coupled with a massive hormonal drop, stress and sleep deprivation.
It really helped me last time to force myself to shower and get dressed everyday, and leave the house at least once, even if it was just to walk to the mailbox with the baby.
Please reach out for support and know that this board is here whenever someone needs to vent or needs support.
It will get better soon, I promise! For most women, it seems to get better almost right around the 6 week PP mark.
Jan 10, 2016: Cycle 16. Femara 5mg + IUI #3 - BFN.
Feb 10, 2016: Cycle 17. No IUI or meds. Taking a break - Natural BFP Mar 5, 2016!!!! EDD Nov 16, 2016
Moving to IVF March 2016
Beta at 10dpo: 21, Beta at 12dpo: 98, Beta at 14dpo: 264, Beta at 16dpo: 745
U/S 6w6d: single beautiful heartbeat of 121bpm - It's a boy!!!!
Nov 3, 2016: Our family became complete. Welcome DS #2.
So I'm starting to wonder if I don't have some form of PPD. It seems to be tied to sleep deprivation, so I'm not sure. Most days I feel fine - optimistic, energetic, capable of tackling the day and stresses of life with a toddler and a baby. But when I've had a few nights in a row of far too little sleep, I start to lose it. The main symptom is rage. I lose my patience and my temper with everyone around me (DH, my toddler, even the baby); I get short-tempered, snappy, and sometimes yell and curse. When I get like this any little thing can set me off. I want to throw things, slam my head against a wall, break dishes, etc. (I don't, but I want to). I want to put my kids in their cribs and just hide in my room while they cry (again, I don't do this, I just think about it). These days also come with their fair share of crying, anxiety, and doubting my ability and worth as a mother. However, once I get some good sleep, it passes and I'm fine. I mentioned it to my doctor at my 6-week checkup, but her only response was, “Do you want me to medicate you or not?” To which I said no. Is this normal? I’m wondering if maybe the rage and irritation is always there, but when I’ve had enough sleep I’m just able to keep it under control. Is this just normal motherhood stress — sometimes there are bad days — or should I talk to my doctor again? I really don't want to go on medication if these are just normal feelings.
Edit: spelling
Welcomed baby girl: 06.10.14
Second pregnancy EDD: 06.16.16 MC: 10.29.15
Welcomed baby boy: 11.25.16
I also have spent too much time thinking about life before baby and wondering why we ever thought this was a good idea. I know it's all connected to the lack of sleep, but I am so over it. And so sick of people saying that it will get better. What I need someone to say is - "yeah, it totally sucks." and just leave it at that. Hearing that it will get better doesn't help because it just feels like I'm going to be the exception to that.
If you haven't already, find a therapist. I feel like I say that all the time on this board, but it has been so so so important for me. Right now I'm having a scheduling issue with my therapist, but I've been trying to start writing down what I'm feeling when I'm in the middle of a low so I can get to the deep stuff with her at our next appt. My last appt I was feeling great and had trouble pinpointing why I thought I needed to see her.
Edited to add: There is nothing wrong with medication, but I think it is too often seen as the solution when talking to a professional can be more beneficial so I would try that before seeking medication options. A good therapist will let you know if they think that would be a good option for you.
Welcomed baby girl: 06.10.14
Second pregnancy EDD: 06.16.16 MC: 10.29.15
Welcomed baby boy: 11.25.16
hsve lingering issues from my husband problems that I am afraid might turn into PPD if it gets as again.
And for now, we have each other to commiserate with!
Welcomed baby girl: 06.10.14
Second pregnancy EDD: 06.16.16 MC: 10.29.15
Welcomed baby boy: 11.25.16
Welcomed baby girl: 06.10.14
Second pregnancy EDD: 06.16.16 MC: 10.29.15
Welcomed baby boy: 11.25.16
- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019Welcomed baby girl: 06.10.14
Second pregnancy EDD: 06.16.16 MC: 10.29.15
Welcomed baby boy: 11.25.16
Take a few moments for you today - read a book, have a cup of something comforting, journal, yoga, or whatever it is that helps you recenter a little. You're doing a great job, even if you are struggling with depression and anxiety, it doesn't negate your awesomeness.
- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019