Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Momifbysea
member
Re: TWW: Oct 31 - Nov 6
Husband: 40
TTC#1 since 9/2014
Unexplained Infertility - Trying naturally
@jennh75b have the wine! Honestly the research really only shows an effect if you binge drink, so just keep it under 4 glasses a day
@vlagrl29 I could never temp due to my schedule, then I read the research on it and decided it wasn't a stressor I needed in my life. Fx that your spotting stays away!
TTC#1 since November 2015
9/16/2016 IUI#1 - BFN
10/12/2016 IUI#2 - BFN
1/21/2017 Clomid/IUI#3 - BFN
March 2017 IVF: BFP! (beta#1 191, beta#2 378!) - it's a boy! DS born 12/6/2017
TTC #2 since July 2018
May 2019 IVF #2: BFP! (beta#1 346, beta#2 646) - vanishing twin at 8 weeks. Baby B still going strong - due 2/8/20!
Im going to go ahead and call my OB tomorrow to see if they can do basic fertility testing in their office. That way we can be ready in December. Called insurance and they don't cover IF treatments or any medicines that may be needed for it. So I'd like to avoid an RE for now if possible.
I have a really bad pain in my right upper butt cheek/glute area. I have chronic low back pain to begin with, but it's always...for 5 years now...been only on my left side around my sacroiliac joint, and sometimes it hurts into my left outer thigh area. Well, for several days now, my right butt area and low back have been hurting, and it's like I did a million squats or something. Today is 12 DPO. My back pain always increases close to AF, but this is ridiculous. I don't know if people this early in a pregnancy would experience something like this or not, seems like it would be a problem further along when you're carrying the extra weight. Admittedly I googled it and I found a few forum discussions where people in the TWW complained of this. But I won't hold my breath.
Husband: 40
TTC#1 since 9/2014
Unexplained Infertility - Trying naturally
Today is my 41st birthday. I spent the morning at my aunt's funeral. Then I come home to my usual pre-AF spotting. I POS yesterday after work because I just had this feeling, and of course it was a BFN. And I'm not supposed to test without H, so I feel bad for that, too, and I won't be telling him I did. They are making me get a blood test on Monday to see if it's a BFP, but frankly, why should I if AF is in full effect? I'm quite sure it will be by then. I'm definitely having wine with dinner tonight. Also, at the funeral home last night, my mom was saying how it makes her sad to see our pics when we were young because we're all grown up now, and my cousin said don't worry, some day you will enjoy looking at them when your kids have kids. H was there, too, and he just said "yeah, some day" sort of quietly. I figured my family would think at my age that child bearing was out of the picture, so never expected to hear a comment like that...as if I still was young and had all of this time ahead of me. Not like it as malicious, I get that, but it just stung a little. Sigh. And there is a horrible murder story in our local news about a girl who killed her child and I literally cried a little over it yesterday. I hate people who have children and do not value the gift they have. ***End vent***
Husband: 40
TTC#1 since 9/2014
Unexplained Infertility - Trying naturally
AF has arrived in full force this morning I am not putting myself through getting that blood test tomorrow morning. I told H AF arrived and he says he's not too upset because he knew the stats aren't great for IUI. He hugged me and I cried anyway even though I knew that, too. I think we are done with any kind of RE interventions. He still wants to keep trying naturally and he still believes it's going to happen for us. i don't really believe that but I don't have the heart to tell him I want to give up. this month H is going away during our prime fertile days and I don't even care.
Husband: 40
TTC#1 since 9/2014
Unexplained Infertility - Trying naturally
TTC#1 since November 2015
9/16/2016 IUI#1 - BFN
10/12/2016 IUI#2 - BFN
1/21/2017 Clomid/IUI#3 - BFN
March 2017 IVF: BFP! (beta#1 191, beta#2 378!) - it's a boy! DS born 12/6/2017
TTC #2 since July 2018
May 2019 IVF #2: BFP! (beta#1 346, beta#2 646) - vanishing twin at 8 weeks. Baby B still going strong - due 2/8/20!
My RE is making me take a blood test anyway, they said he is one of the docs that likes to have a blood test on everyone, so to me it's like rubbing salt into a wound, but I will do it because I don't want to be labeled as a non-compliant patient!
Husband: 40
TTC#1 since 9/2014
Unexplained Infertility - Trying naturally
Husband: 40
TTC#1 since 9/2014
Unexplained Infertility - Trying naturally
Husband: 40
TTC#1 since 9/2014
Unexplained Infertility - Trying naturally
Husband: 40
TTC#1 since 9/2014
Unexplained Infertility - Trying naturally