Second Trimester feelings

harperk555 · November 2016

Hi there - I'm well into my second trimester, no more symptoms, and just feel kinda fat and not pregnant. I know everyone is different, and some moms pop later - right now I just feel blah in all of my clothes, and want to have a bump to feel pregnant. Does anyone else feel a little blah during the second trimester until they "pop"?

lovelongdog06 · November 2016

I do feel a little in between right now. My maternity clothes aren't fitting great this pregnancy probably due to me retaining 10 lbs of weight from my first pregnancy. I'm pregnant enough to look obvious to anyone who knows me, but not big enough to elicit warm fuzzy pregnant comments, which isn't the worst.

doozenberg · November 2016

Same with me @harperk555, if you know me you can tell that I'm pregnant, and just this past week (I'm 18 and half weeks now) I started getting more of a bump. The rest of the public probably can't really tell yet. Like that in between is she pregnant? The weight gain has been hard to adjust to. I know I have to gain for baby and all, I think it's just hard when you don't have the bump reminding you that.

bww_0331 · November 2016

I'm having a hard time adjusting as well. I can tell I've gained/getting a little bigger but it isn't a cute little bump. Yesterday we took a "bump" picture for 19 weeks and I put it side by side with my 9 week picture. It isn't a huge difference, but I had just gotten to the best shape of my life and now I'm a little sad that will be going away. People who don't know I'm pregnant can't tell. I feel bad that it bothers me to be putting on weight when I know I need to. It is hard to wrap my head around when it isn't the "bump" I was expecting so I hope as I get further along and it turns more to baby vs hey she eats a lot of carbs that I won't have these feelings.

On on the right side, I've been using these feelings as a reason to shop! Especially for oversized, long sweaters now that cold weather is coming upon us. That has helped my mood. Totally ready to just wear comfy clothes all winter

doozenberg · November 2016

@wagnerw, I totally know what you're feeling. But you're right on the bright side new shopping experience. I love the large, oversized sweaters! So comfy and hide a lot!

nwshay · November 2016

@harperk555 thank you for starting this thread!

I feel exactly the same way. My pants don't fit, but I don't look pregnant so it seems silly to wear maternity pants. I don't feel pregnant and I don't have a bump so it still doesn't feel real. I get bummed everyday when I look down and there's still no bump. People keep saying I'm starting to show but I really think I just look fat.

andrea0418 · November 2016

@wagnerw I know how you feel. I had just lost 30lbs from feb-June and was feeling so confident. I know I am going to gain weight but I don't like getting on the scale.

smallanimal · November 2016

@harperk555 exact;y the same here. I can tell, my husband can tell, my mom can tell, everyone else must be walking around thinking "she has let herself go". Toughest is at work because I normally wear tailored dresses and now they do not fit anymore. But I cannot wear stuff that shows off the bump yet, as they don't know the news. So I am sticking to cheap, loose fitted patterned fabric dresses for now and I hate them with passion.

Also, yesterday we announced to my husband's extended family and one of the comments I got from his cousin (who is super lovely), that I am not showing yet. Felt really disheartened, I wanted them to think I am showing a bit, surely I dont look this fat normally?

I guess this will pass in a few week's time....

kitkat8387 · November 2016

I feel the same way. It's very obvious to my family and friends, but strangers probably wouldn't know (at least for sure) that I am pregnant at this point. I know I shouldn't care what random people think, but I hate walking around looking/feeling so frumpy. I'm about 19 weeks so it shouldn't be long before I have a very obvious bump, I hope. I also hate when people say "you're barely showing yet!" I know they mean it as a compliment but it makes me feel sort of inadequate and like a fraud, if that makes sense. Especially since I have gained a lot of weight already.

I'm also really struggling with this pregnancy not feeling real yet. I am really hoping after my anatomy scan next week when I (hopefully) know everything is progressing normally and I know if the baby is a boy or a girl, it will seem real. I'm so scared for the anatomy scan too, which isn't helping. People keep talking to me about the birth (why does everyone love telling horror stories?!?!) and it doesn't even scare me because I haven't wrapped my head around the fact that I'll be giving birth in 5 months. I'm very frustrated with these feelings because this baby was planned and is very much loved already, i just can't get my mind to accept reality for some reason.

cafedisco · November 2016

I think people make comments about not showing or being small to try to be polite. I've gotten that a LOT from coworkers, but then my students make daily comments about my huge tummy (out of the mouths of babes...). It's super annoying because I'd rather look pregnant than chunky. I rub my belly when I'm out - a lot.

KirstinH88 · November 2016

@kitkat8387 and anyone else who is struggling with feelings of the pregnancy not feeling real yet. With my pregnancy with DS, I did not like the first half of pregnancy. I felt fat and frumpy, not cute and bumpy. I didn't feel pregnant. Then everything hit at once. We found out he was a boy, settled on a name, and I was able to start feeling his movements and his kicks. That's when my love for pregnancy REALLY kicked in. And let me tell you, I love my son SO much! If I could spend every second of every day with him, I would. He is so amazing. I'm glad that "real" feeling and the love kicked in, sometimes it just takes awhile.
With this one, I definitely feel pregnant and we found out we are having another boy. I can not feel him yet and we don't have a name. I already feel crazy amounts of love for him and love to just sit back and picture what he will look like and what personality he will have. I honestly can't wait to have a mini DS (I'm telling you, my love for that kid is unreal).

nwshay · November 2016

@Smallanimal I hate that! I'll run into someone and tell them I'm pregnant and the next question is how far? when I tell them, people have almost acted like they don't believe me! a coworker even lifted up my jacket and said, what are you hiding under there? then said oh. nothing. It hurt my feelings!!

doozenberg · November 2016

@SDSwenson, that's so mean! I'm always amazed how people will say anything to a pregnant person. I mean come on!
I've been pretty lucky in that I haven't had many comments but the number of people who would always ask me if I'm pregnant (before I was pregnant and then when it was too early for me to reveal) really amazed me. Especially people who I told about my MC. It was very eye opening to say the least. I don't know what kind of experiences you ladies have had about that. I'd be interested to hear.
Phew nice to get that off my chest!

kitkat8387 · November 2016

@cafedisco I agree that people say it to be polite or as a compliment. I'm trying to think back to whether I ever said that to anyone in the past, and I think I may have, also meaning it in a positive way. I never realized until now how it can be hurtful when you are told you don't look pregnant, when that's all you want. From now on, I'll stick to "you look great!" Or something along those lines. I think commenting on people's weight/size is inappropriate anyway.

@KirstinH88 glad to know I'm not the only one! My husband and my mom both think I'm crazy for being almost halfway through and still not feeling like it's real.

KirstinH88 · November 2016

@kitkat8387 It really is totally normal, but I'm hoping you start to get that real feeling soon. I absolutely LOVED the 2nd half of pregnancy.

kitkat8387 · November 2016

@KirstinH88 fingers crossed it will happen after the anatomy scan! 9 more days, I'm counting down.

MWoodside · November 2016

I've already popped, but I'm still sick 24/7 so I still feel blah.

smallanimal · November 2016

@SDSwenson that is actually mean... hope you told them off! I completely understand you.. in a few week's time they will all see!

by the way, we have the same edd! and @MWoodside too

@kitkat8387 100% agree with everything you wrote. I am also not at all worried about birth - maybe when my baby starts moving, as @KirstinH88 said.

It's really strange, how simultaneously I don't want to look fat but want to look pregnant... sometimes I ask my colleague at work (who is one of the few who knows) whether I am looking bulky, and she always says no, and I want to hear no, but then I am sad that it wasnt a yes. Weird!!!

Want a personalized experience?

Second Trimester feelings

Re: Second Trimester feelings

Choose Another Board

Search Boards