Twatwaffle Tuesday 10/25

KirstinH88 · October 2016

I'm starting this for selfish reasons. But share who is a twatwaffle in your life today!

KirstinH88 · October 2016

For the past week I have been hounded by a coworker in another unit. Everything I do, she has some comment or criticism. I have been in my position for 2 years, while she had only been in hers since February. To try to not make the story so complicated, we work with grants. I fund and track the money, while she works on the project side. One of our grantees emailed both her and I and asked a question. Since I knew she was having comments for everything I said, I privately emailed her with what my response (the correct one) would be. She did not respond to me or the grantee. The next day the grantee called me because she hadn't heard an answer. I told the grantee my answer (again, the correct answer). About two days later, the lady from the other unit calls me and asks what my response was and she immediately jumps on it. She told the grantee (without copying me on the email. I only found out through the grapevine) to disregard my answer because I was wrong. So I did about two hours of research, turning into 4 pages of why my answer was correct. She is a twatwaffle. Don't mess with pregnant, hormonal KirstinH88!!!

ShelbyTaryn · October 2016

@KirstinH88 Thank you! Up all night with a teething toddler... totaaly forgot to open this thread!

schef070911 · October 2016

@KirstinH88 I work in a grants office too!! On the project/pre-award side though... I'm sure many of the issues are the same.

TW for today belongs to my University's parking office. Because I don't want to pay $50/month (are you even KIDDING me?) to park close to my office, I park about 10 min. away from my building and walk in every day. I don't mind it (especially now when the weather's cool!), but the parking office keeps changing where we can park and doesn't notify anyone. Literally, I got a message this morning about a change in the lot I can park in from a colleague who saw it on TWITTER. Can I get an email notification, please?!? That is beyond ridiculous.

Never mind the fact that all their parking maps on their website are at least 1 year out of date and nobody ever seems to know where people with my permit type can/can't park when I call over there. If I ever get ticketed, I'm gonna raise some hell!!

MrsBakes · October 2016

My H is a total TW today. We hardly ever argue let alone full on fight. Well today, we had a "text" fight and it wasn't pretty. I asked if he can help my mom out who doesn't have a printer at home but is holding a cooking class today to print 1 PAGE! But him and my mom kept texting me instead of talking to each other like adults. So I just told him "please handle it I don't have to time for this I'm at work. He is off today. He replies with "oh yeah "I don't have time' (as in me) but I have to drop f&ing everything. I was going hunting and now I have to drop everything yet again"? He was throwing F bombs like I was ruining his life for asking him to PRINT ONE PAGE!!!! When I shot back and said OMG it's one Fn page and you can't postpone your local hunting trip by 20 minutes? So he starts off with telling me that MY BEHAVIOUR AND ATTACK ON HIM was unacceptable and I should watch how I speak to him or he'll never help out again or more so "we will have bigger problems". He is a total ahole today and I'm beyond pissed. Not to mention that when DD doesn't sleep at night I'm the one with her and I still have to go to work. Then on the weekends I'm the one getting up early with her while he needs more sleep. On Sunday, after DD was waking up every our all night long, I got up with her at 7.30 and took her to the Zoo and was gone all day. He slept until almost noon. He has NEVER done that for me. But I'm being inconsiderate and disrespectful. UGH, ok sorry I'm done now

HGRich · October 2016

I shouldn't write this here. It's petty and dramatic and I'm the opposite of that. I'm anti drama and pretty chill and forgiving.

But im angry and this is a nice place to fairly anonymously rant. Haha!

A group of friends have been jerkfaces for awhile. They said they were there for me after my mc in June and so I relied on their help for awhile. They brought food after the surgery and cleaned my house as I was healing.

But i made the mistake of turning to them for emotional support. I quickly realized they were not prepared to handle that and didn't know how. I get that. Helping someone through grief if you've never been there isn't easy.

But since they also all had newborn babies I told them I couldn't hang out for awhile. It was too painful. When I was finally ready a couple months later one of them informed me the rest of them were all angry with me for not talking to them and not hanging out with them and basically not healing fast enough to feel and act like a normal human around them and took offense at some of the things I said about how I wished they wouldn't rush me to "get over it and try to have babies again."

Then when i got pregnant again they acted like I was all done with grieving and had nothing to be upset about anymore and there's no way I'd have to mc's in a row and I needed to stop being anxious about this one. By this point I was spotting and upset and stressed out so I stopped talking to them altogether. Which probably didn't help but I didn't care. This baby was more important to me.

I told them I'd meet with them in the second trimester when I felt better. Was supposed to meet with them this Thursday to talk through our feelings and try to restore our friendships. Then just now I saw a Facebook post that they're all taking their babies to a farm instead for a fall activity and didn't say a word to me.

Im done. I'm so angry I don't feel like I even want to give them closure. And this isn't like me. I've never had an enemy in my life and i hate having invested in people who treated me so badly and especially after my mc. I know this all sounds really biased and like there might be more to the story but if there is, I don't know it either. I don't know what they've assumed about me and how they've talked about me for the past few months. I know I'm at fault for not having communicated. But this baby was and is more important and I needed to leave the drama while working through grief and the anxiety of PGAL.

Bye Felicia. I forgive them and don't want to have hard feelings but I'm just done. This is so immature and petty.

ashleym112 · October 2016

My sister is my TW this week. She borrowed our umbrella stroller over the summer and the past few weeks we've been asking for it back. I was supposed to get it from her at some point late summer but we all forgot about, including her. I told her to please look for it while she was at my dad's and she flipped out saying it wasn't her responsibility because she left it somewhere (so she says) and that if it's gone she's not replacing it or interesting in remembering where it is. This is a nice umbrella stroller, not a $15 one. We spent the extra dollars on a taller one with a basket underneath and a reclining back. It's not crazy expensive, but enough for me to want it back and not want to buy a new one. Anyway, she flipped out about it and now I'm not talking to her for a few days lol. She acts like it's some huge inconvenience and such a HUGE favor to just LOOK and see if it's at my dads for us, where she is crashing, but has no issue asking us for money, babysitting, etc. She's doesn't do anything for anyone unless it benefits her in some way. She won't even babysit DS unless we promise something in return. She's just nuts...ugh lol

MrsBakes · October 2016

@HGRich

Oh man, some friends you've got. I know this must be hard but you have every right to be mad and done with them. That is absolutely no way to treat a friend ESPECIALLY when they are going through such difficult times. It's selfish and disrespectful to expect of someone to hurry up with dealing with their grief so they can get on with what they think is right. I've had "friends" like that and I have decided that I don't have time for that kind of drama. I have a few amazing people I call friends who never give me grief about anything. We all have the mutual understanding that Yes, we are friends, yes we love each other, yes we are there for each other BUT we also know that priorities change once one has kids and things can't always be planned or work out. We simply know not to have specific expectations. That's also IMO what it means to be a good friend. To accept and support when one friend can't be there, but that you can be there for them exactly for that reason. If that makes any sense.

I'm really sorry you have to deal with that. It's just not right

Taylor72 · October 2016

My TW today is me. I have myself so freaked out that something is wrong because I "haven't felt pregnant in 3 weeks" that I made myself sick. I'm a fricking TW for sure.

HGRich · October 2016

Thank you @MrsBakes. Fortunately I have true friends who have loved me through the difficult times lately. They just don't live in town. I wish they did. But it's nice I haven't been truly alone. My coworkers have all been really nice too.

I was actually also commiserating with your post because my DH has kind of been a twatwaffle lately too.

Anyway, thanks. I've definitely learned a nice lesson about the stark contrast between my really good friends who have been there for me for years and those who really don't know how to be that kind of friend.

bww_0331 · October 2016

My TW today is the name change process after getting married. It is such a pain in the butt. New SS card, new license, I switched banks, trying to get all of my direct deposit/withdrawals to match up within a paycheck so I'm not getting charged fees, switching names on accounts, etc. I'M OVER IT. DH complains when I whine about it. I'd like to see him change his name and direct deposit/withdrawal on every flipping account.

(Yes, I know I unfortunately caused this by deciding to take his name, but it is still frustrating and I can't wait to be done). End rant.

Lovable Bump · October 2016

My TW is definitely my boss haha. Our office is SOOO disorganized, uncoordinated, understaffed and getting busier (I work in a small law firm). My boss is a nice enough guy, but is not open to hearing suggestions on how to make the office run more efficiently and smooth. Every time we pitch ideas to him, it's always "well this is how I run my business". Okay dude.

chelle087 · October 2016

The lady at work that has probably heard through the grape vine that I am pregnant and stares at my belly every time she passes me. It's so annoying!

Taylor72 · October 2016

Can I change my answer? My TW is my freaking husband. He comes home from work and has just enough time to eat and drop off his stuff before he has to get to training. I ask him what he wants to eat and he says little sandwiches (I made 12 of them the night before which he had 4 of right after they were done baking, they are just little Hawaiian roll sammies) I took 4 for lunch today which leaves 4 left. I said well if you eat those 4 now, what are you going to take for lunch tomorrow. He literally says "you ate 4 sandwiches between last night and tonight" my initial reaction was ohhh he's totally kidding. NOPE. this jackass has the balls to give me shit about eating 4 small ass sandwiches. I lit him up right then an there. I also work a full time job and has he ever once worried about what I was going to take for lunch the next day? NOPE. and I don't expect him to, I am 26 years old, I should be able to figure out my own lunch. He is 31 and apparently I need to make sure he is fed every night and has something the next day for lunch. Hey pal, how about you cook dinner for once in your life and worry about someone other than your freaking self. UGH

Cook3133 · October 2016

My husband is the twat! I am so done with trying to help with his two older boys and him being a complete ass to me back. Sorry your adult children are lazy and incompetent I'm done trying to help. I seriously never want to have another conversation with him about his two boys again! Ugh I'm just pissed!
His 18yo who lives with us needs a job and has been looking very half ass for one. I've been trying to help by making suggestions. I asked on an FB site today if anyone local was hiring and brought it up at dinner and my husband blew his top, why can't we go 24 hours without talking about this.... Gee IDFK maybe because he's not really looking, is supposed to pay us for his insurance, and he has NO leads! I told him I give up I am out of his kids lives and never want to talk to him about them again. I'm done! Most of our conversations about them end up in arguments

Ugh sorry for the rant, just letting it go and I don't post this crap on FB

mylittleirvz · October 2016

@Taylor72, I feel you on the husband dealing with his own meals thing. We both work full time, I do a majority of the child care right now cause DS is attached to me like no other, i do most of the housework, yet somehow i still need to be in charge of ALL meal planning, preparing and cleaning up. If DS and i just eat leftovers (he gets home about an hour after we do) he goes "well what am i supposed to eat?" I tell him what the options are (which i shouldn't even need to do) and he goes all sad and pathetic "that's fine, guess i just won't eat. I'm not that hungry anyway." Oh my, really? If i don't fix you a plate and sit you down, you can't eat? You are 33 years old and lived on your own for many years before we got together - how did you ever survive?? Ok, end rant. I just wanted you to know i can relate!

shaunessa · October 2016

@mylittleirvz

OMG! Lol, that is so my husband on Saturday mornings! Me and DS wake up early and he sleeps in bc "he needs his extra sleep" So of course I make DS and I breakfast and 2 hours later when he wakes up he asks "what's for breakfast?" I tell him we've eaten 2 hrs ago and he replies with "that's fine, guess I won't eat. I'll have to wait for lunch". Its like sorry bud,not feeling sorry for you! I guess he's never heard the term "Early bird gets the worm!"

rachelmiller03 · October 2016

@MrsBakes
@shaunessa
I'm so glad I'm not the only one! DH does get up with DS in the middle of the night, because if I do he will NOT go back to sleep for me, and wants to nurse, but I wake up for work daily at 5:00am. With DH he goes back to sleep in less than a minute. On weekends, DS wakes between 6-7. I get up with him every single time. Then DH comes downstairs several hours later and says "thanks for letting me sleep in, what's for breakfast?". Dude. Really? 1st- its always the same answer, whatever you make yourself. 2nd- I haven't slept past 7:00am in the last 14 months, you can give your preggo wife just one day????

Taylor72 · October 2016

YES! @mylittleirvz this is exactly it! like I don't understand how he survived without me for so long? He used to cook and do laundry all by himself, but now it's like wife=maid. I say nay nay!

Nolegirl1185 · November 2016

@HGRich Have you heard the quote..."There are three types of friends. Friends for a reason, friends for a season, and friends for a lifetime". I think you did everything exactly as you needed and in a totally appropriate selfish way. If these "friends" can't see past that, then that season is over.

marshmallowmadness · November 2016

Nolegirl1185 said:

@HGRich Have you heard the quote..."There are three types of friends. Friends for a reason, friends for a season, and friends for a lifetime". I think you did everything exactly as you needed and in a totally appropriate selfish way. If these "friends" can't see past that, then that season is over.

Love this!

HGRich · November 2016

@Nolegirl1185 thank you. You're right. I think that season is definitely over. I'm disappointed but honestly relieved. I've always trusted people too much and hopefully I've learned to be more choosy without being jaded. Sigh.

Twatwaffle Tuesday 10/25

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