June 2017 Moms

Appointment Chatter - Week of 10/24

There have been some complaints about what a catch-all the "Pregnancy Chatter" weekly thread is and how long it gets so I'm making a thread for randoms and symptoms, too. We haven't done any of them as a weekly thread yet so let's try it out. Hopefully no one minds that I took a shot at this organization all at once on a Monday morning.  :#

This is where we can take the opportunity to chat about whatever you want to talk about with regard to going to see your OB/MW. 


Me: 36;  DH: 38
DD: 7; DS1: 4; DS2 due 6-21-17!
**TW**
MMC & D&C Aug 2016
«13

Re: Appointment Chatter - Week of 10/24

  • I have my first appointment on Friday. I'm
    just going to mostly ask how much is different because I'm over 35 this time. And then its only 3 weeks until my NT scan!! What?!
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  • I'm excited to follow this thread because I have my first OB appointments this week/next. I made appointments at 2 different offices to decide which one I like better. The first (which is on Friday) is a nurse visit at the office I've been going to for gynecology for a few years now. I made another appointment for next week at an office that has both OBs and midwives on staff and they are affiliated with a nice, new women's hospital near my house, which I like. I have no clue what to expect at either of these two appointments, or what questions I should be asking!
    ***BFP & Child Warning***

    Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
    IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
    IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
    FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
    FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
    FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
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  • I had my "Ob orientation" today. That was... interesting. Basically we quickly talked to a nurse then had a class then back in with the nurse. If I didn't have a complicated history with pregnancy and birth I wouldn't be seen again until December. But I do, so I get to go back tomorrow so the dr can assess me and hopefully schedule an ultrasound for next week. My PGAL brain is going crazy, and I really need some reassurance. 

    Mom to Madison- 5 and Lillian 2....and now surprise baby #3!
  • First ultrasound is today. It's a dating one since I am breastfeeding and apparently it's harder to pinpoint the due date if you are, but I am pretty certain on my dates. It's not until this afternoon because I wanted DH to be there and he has to hold DD. Already the day is going by slow.

    @wifeinraleigh28 - That's smart to make 2 appointments! I'm lazy and just went with the OB that was given to me...we used her last time, but she's retiring in March so that will be interesting.
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  • I had my first appointment today. Baby's measuring perfectly at 8 weeks and had a great heartbeat.  :)

    We waited around forever between the ultrasound and the dr appt and then the only thing of substance we talked to the dr about was genetic testing. It was quite a downer. I don't have any risk factors but they still offer the different tests and I hate hearing all the negatives. I wish the appointment could have been more rainbows and sunshine and yay look at my healthy little gummy bear!
  • I have an appointment with a nurse just to get a flu shot today. I'll probably ask a few questions if there is time. 
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  • JAGinMI said:
    @BelhurstBride @kassyfry There is no one saying you can't also post whatever you want, wherever you want, whenever you want. 
    :glances up at the very first post: 

    suuuurree... 
    DD1 4.14.10
    DD2 8.22.13
    MMC 1.4.17 at 16w
    Expecting #3, EDD 1.29.18

    Pregnancy Ticker

  • First ultrasound is today. It's a dating one since I am breastfeeding and apparently it's harder to pinpoint the due date if you are, 
    Hm. That's interesting. I was still BFing DD1 when I was first pregnant with DD2 and that was never a concern mentioned and I never had a dating u/s. My OB went with the dates I provided. 
    DD1 4.14.10
    DD2 8.22.13
    MMC 1.4.17 at 16w
    Expecting #3, EDD 1.29.18

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  • BelhurstBrideBelhurstBride member
    edited October 2016
    I disagree. 

    1) it's not loose structure when someone does make their own post and everyone responds with "this should be in the blahblah thread." 

    2) I don't see it as an "effort to build a community," I see it as a way to force activity- by the first couple of people to head to this board- since we're no longer allowed to say anything that could possible hurt someone's feelings. 
    DD1 4.14.10
    DD2 8.22.13
    MMC 1.4.17 at 16w
    Expecting #3, EDD 1.29.18

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • I had my nurse appointment last week with general information about do's/don'ts, clinic policies, health history, getting into the system, and getting a ton of blood drawn.  This Friday I have an appointment where I will get to meet my midwife and get my first ultrasound.  Yet another reason that Friday can't come fast enough!
  • First appointment on Friday! 
    Ultrasound to check dates and hopefully see a heartbeat. 

    Im a little nervous, I've never had an appointment this early. I switched ob's because we moved this summer, my ob with my first two didn't see me until 10-12 weeks. This new one I had to come in for a urine test and bloodwork, and gen scheduled my appointment for between 6-8 weeks. 
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  • I have my first ultrasound tomorrow due to RPL history at 5+6. Hoping everything looks good!

    GL to everyone with appointments coming up!
  • Dental appointment Wedneaday....I sure hope I can get these wisdom teeth pulled. Any one with any experiences with that...what kind of pain medicine can I take after the extractions...
  • Assiram42 said:
    I hear BabyCenter is lovely and has very little rules. 

    Baby Center used to be where newbs GBCB-ed to. My, how times have changes.

    JAGinMI said:
    @Assiram42 or a post for every u/s, or a post every time someone had an appointment, or a post for every intro, etc etc. Also, the best thing TB did in this transition was to make it so you were placed right where you last left off in a thread so you don't even have to go back through and try to figure out where you left off. There are a lot of positives to the new format.
    That, I can agree with. 

    But there didn't used to be a post for every appointment, u/s, intro, ect. It was a lot more discussion about actual things and a lot less focus on the minor details of pregnancy. More in depth. The boards developed more organically. It was less... I don't know the word I'm looking for. Not such a girl scouts and kumbaya feel. You had to have your big girl panties on, but I assure you. It was a fun place. 
    DD1 4.14.10
    DD2 8.22.13
    MMC 1.4.17 at 16w
    Expecting #3, EDD 1.29.18

    Pregnancy Ticker

  • We went thus morning for our 1st u/s...based on last period I would be 6w6d...however I was a week late when I finally turned a test...at ultra sound today they found an empty sac and told Us to come back 11/2 to check progress...the doctor thinks I ovulated later and am more 5 weeks than almost 7.   This is going to be the hardest 10 days.

  • First ultrasound is today. It's a dating one since I am breastfeeding and apparently it's harder to pinpoint the due date if you are, 
    Hm. That's interesting. I was still BFing DD1 when I was first pregnant with DD2 and that was never a concern mentioned and I never had a dating u/s. My OB went with the dates I provided. 
    I wasn't expecting it since I told them I was sure of my LMP. I had blood drawn too to check my levels. Can't complain too much though because I get to have an ultrasound today instead of waiting until November 15!
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  • Assiram42 said:
    BelhurstBride said: *snip*

    JAGinMI said:
    @Assiram42 or a post for every u/s, or a post every time someone had an appointment, or a post for every intro, etc etc. Also, the best thing TB did in this transition was to make it so you were placed right where you last left off in a thread so you don't even have to go back through and try to figure out where you left off. There are a lot of positives to the new format.
    That, I can agree with. 

    But there didn't used to be a post for every appointment, u/s, intro, ect. It was a lot more discussion about actual things and a lot less focus on the minor details of pregnancy. More in depth. The boards developed more organically. It was less... I don't know the word I'm looking for. Not such a girl scouts and kumbaya feel. You had to have your big girl panties on, but I assure you. It was a fun place. 
    I've been here since 2010.  Trust me, I understand. I honestly think it's one big misunderstanding. No one is saying you can't make an individual post, I think they're just saying it makes more sense to post in a conversation already happening regarding the same subject.  Like you said, it wasn't a bunch of intro, u/s, etc. type posts, they're more in-depth.  I think that's exactly what they're trying to do.  

    Basically, I think we're all saying the same thing, but it's not being conveyed or interpreted properly.
    I agree with this and I think we'll get there. Seems like a really nice group so far. 

    I think there's also a sense of not wanting to be told what to do. Not that I really think that's anyone's intention. But the passive aggressive UOs about people not reading the rules or not posting where they should bug me, doing that while saying you're trying to build community strikes me as disingenuous.

    Not really anything new though. The BMBs usually get staked out by TTgP folks since they're often testing earlier and more in tune with early pregnancy. It's natural that the board comes with some of the TTGP culture. As more people mix in it balances out. Though people at the end of the month get screwed coming in with questions that have already been discussed several times by an earlier wave of posters. 

    I love when salty old regs come back and shake things up. They usually end up being some of my favorite posters. I say that in the nicest way possible @BelhurstBride. :) 
  • First U/S is tomorrow.   I'll be just shy of 6w if my math is right.   I'm excited / nervous
    Me: 34 DH: 36
    Married: June 2014
    DS Born 6/22/17


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  • @wifeinraleigh28 I will also be trying out two different offices. Do you plan to tell the first office that you have a second appointment somewhere else? I'm not sure if I should just go ahead and do blood work and whatnot at the first office even if I decide to go with the second. So many different decision!
  • I think there's also a sense of not wanting to be told what to do. Not that I really think that's anyone's intention. But the passive aggressive UOs about people not reading the rules or not posting where they should bug me, doing that while saying you're trying to build community strikes me as disingenuous.

    Not really anything new though. The BMBs usually get staked out by TTgP folks since they're often testing earlier and more in tune with early pregnancy. It's natural that the board comes with some of the TTGP culture. As more people mix in it balances out. Though people at the end of the month get screwed coming in with questions that have already been discussed several times by an earlier wave of posters. 

    I love when salty old regs come back and shake things up. They usually end up being some of my favorite posters. I say that in the nicest way possible @BelhurstBride. :) 
    Exactly!! Thank you!!! This is what I was trying to say a few weeks ago, @thankfully just did it better and more eloquently. 
  • I have my materni21 testing scheduled for Halloween!
  • I'm too lazy to quote and reply but on the topic of structured threads - weekly threads for fffc, hdbd, u/o Thursday are to have some fun and get to know people. You want to have weekly threads for appointments, symptoms etc that's cool too but it's also cool if someone posts their own.  So often someone's question or concern gets buried in a giant thread where everyone posts "so nauseous today".  I've seen what an amazing and supportive community you can build from TB and a lot of that will be missed if you police what everyone posts.  The board will evolve organically as people get to know each other and get comfortable but everyone needs to chill and let that happen.  Feel free to flame the 700th is this my mucous plug or am I in labor post because they will happen but it irritates me when someone posts a question or concern and all they get back is "this should go on (insert thread here)".  I'm by no means a bump expert but I know for a fact that I couldn't do without my a15 ladies and the community we built wasn't built on structures posts.  Yep we flamed people for not using the search function, posting stupid questions like "my doctor said this but I want to ask a bunch of internet strangers instead" but nobody was worried about what thread they needed to post on.  Chill ladies, don't let the hormones get the best of you and concentrate on getting to know each other instead of getting to be the boss.  
  • @annalhaller I didn't even think about if I would tell them anything or not... I might just go ahead and do whatever bloodwork they want to do at each visit and then make my decision... but I don't know!
    ***BFP & Child Warning***

    Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
    IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
    IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
    FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
    FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
    FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
  • hjphillipshjphillips member
    edited October 2016
    Elyse1384 said:
    abmommy15 said:
    I'm too lazy to quote and reply but on the topic of structured threads - weekly threads for fffc, hdbd, u/o Thursday are to have some fun and get to know people. You want to have weekly threads for appointments, symptoms etc that's cool too but it's also cool if someone posts their own.  So often someone's question or concern gets buried in a giant thread where everyone posts "so nauseous today".  I've seen what an amazing and supportive community you can build from TB and a lot of that will be missed if you police what everyone posts.  The board will evolve organically as people get to know each other and get comfortable but everyone needs to chill and let that happen.  Feel free to flame the 700th is this my mucous plug or am I in labor post because they will happen but it irritates me when someone posts a question or concern and all they get back is "this should go on (insert thread here)".  I'm by no means a bump expert but I know for a fact that I couldn't do without my a15 ladies and the community we built wasn't built on structures posts.  Yep we flamed people for not using the search function, posting stupid questions like "my doctor said this but I want to ask a bunch of internet strangers instead" but nobody was worried about what thread they needed to post on.  Chill ladies, don't let the hormones get the best of you and concentrate on getting to know each other instead of getting to be the boss.  
    You're entitled to your opinion, but I personally feel the above line is unacceptable.  It is just exasperating to me when one woman calls another woman hormonal based on a different POV.  Men can hold different opinions and and it isn't blamed on hormones, so lets not play that game here.  It is belittling. 

    I was on N15 and we did ultimately end up with structure after quite a lot of frustration caused by repeat posts over shared issues/events (eg baby shower, U/S photos, sex reveal) and we had a fantastic board.  We had individual threads where it made sense (eg a diagnosis during ultrasound, questions/concerns on a specific test result).  I'm part of a FB group with many of them and feel the same way about that BMB as you feel about yours.  While your structural experience on A15 sounds different than mine on N15, it doesn't mean we both didn't build strong relationships within our communities. I was also here pre-exodus on M14 (lurked given a late join) and it was the exact opposite of many of the BMBs today.  I've seen a pretty wide array of board formats and I genuinely feel that shared threads encourage community.  To me it is like having a discussion with friends. I get more opinions and thoughts when I engage in a dialogue with friends. Now if while they're talking about an issue in one room, I walk into a different room and have a monologue about the same issue, both groups lose out.  They don't get the extra opinion/experience and I've just missed tons of great info by isolating myself.  I just don't see why everyone needs their own "sex reveal" thread or their own "baby shower" thread.  No on in camp "do what I want when I want" can seem to give me a valid reason as to why this makes sense other than "I don't want to be told what to do" which in my opinion is merely an unfortunate perception of good intention from many members here.
    I think the biggest problem we're already encountering is the insistence on structure, which really is off putting. I've seen several people post their own thread wanting a helpful opinion, or even just trying to start a fun GTKY and being told not to start their own topic, it belongs somewhere else. It makes this not seem like a friendly, open place. 

    ETA: also, we are all hormonal. We're pregnant. Don't take it too personally. 
  • Elyse1384Elyse1384 member
    edited October 2016
    That is quite interesting @hjphillips given page 1 is a complete mix of organized threads and individual threads.  The individual threads are getting helpful responses while also letting OP know where a larger convo on the subject came up if she wants to chime in there or just read other responses.  I've done this a couple of times - given an answer or opinion while also sharing where a larger convo on the same issue is happening.  To me that is far from insistence.  Also I've seen a variety of ladies start organized threads and I don't think anyone is saying "you can't do that!".   

    ETA:  Every human has hormones.  Would you call anyone with a different POV than you hormonal?  Or do you think that's fine to just reserve for pregnant women?  So yeahhhh... 
  • Elyse1384 said:
    That is quite interesting @hjphillips given page 1 is a complete mix of organized threads and individual threads.  The individual threads are getting helpful responses while also letting OP know where a larger convo on the subject came up if she wants to chime in there or just read other responses.  I've done this a couple of times - given an answer or opinion while also sharing where a larger convo on the same issue is happening.  To me that is far from insistence.  Also I've seen a variety of ladies start organized threads and I don't think anyone is saying "you can't do that!".   

    ETA:  Every human has hormones.  Would you call anyone with a different POV than you hormonal?  Or do you think that's fine to just reserve for pregnant women?  So yeahhhh... 
    I guess I'm just trying to say that it's off putting. And every person who tries to tell you why it's off putting is wrong and that's really crappy.

    i guess we're blaming hormones because you're refusing to even try to see any point of view but your own, and that kind of ridiculous stubbornness isn't normal. 
  • @hjphillips LOL. So how can I possibly see your point when you and everyone with the POV of "post what I want when I want" has refused to offer a point other than "don't tell me what to do"?  That doesn't answer my repeated question of "how do one off threads for shared issues/events benefit the community?"  I've asked that several times in threads where this comes up and yet no one answers me.  I on the other hand have given different examples as to why I feel a certain degree of organization helps.  I haven't forced my preference on anyone and I have said that if the larger community prefers otherwise than I will shut up.  Go back and look at my post history if you don't believe me.  I have been responsive to both organized threads and individual threads.  I guess if that makes me "stubborn" and "not normal" than so be it.  I consider it mature, logical and communicative despite a lot of negativity from those with an opposing view.  From where I'm sitting, you and a couple of ladies here are just coming off as negative and angry because you don't like organized threads.  You guys literally came to an organized thread to complain about organized threads.  I've done nothing but give a different point of view and you're reaction is to call me hormonal and an unnatural kind of stubborn.  OK haha
  • Elyse1384 said:
    abmommy15 said:
    I'm too lazy to quote and reply but on the topic of structured threads - weekly threads for fffc, hdbd, u/o Thursday are to have some fun and get to know people. You want to have weekly threads for appointments, symptoms etc that's cool too but it's also cool if someone posts their own.  So often someone's question or concern gets buried in a giant thread where everyone posts "so nauseous today".  I've seen what an amazing and supportive community you can build from TB and a lot of that will be missed if you police what everyone posts.  The board will evolve organically as people get to know each other and get comfortable but everyone needs to chill and let that happen.  Feel free to flame the 700th is this my mucous plug or am I in labor post because they will happen but it irritates me when someone posts a question or concern and all they get back is "this should go on (insert thread here)".  I'm by no means a bump expert but I know for a fact that I couldn't do without my a15 ladies and the community we built wasn't built on structures posts.  Yep we flamed people for not using the search function, posting stupid questions like "my doctor said this but I want to ask a bunch of internet strangers instead" but nobody was worried about what thread they needed to post on.  Chill ladies, don't let the hormones get the best of you and concentrate on getting to know each other instead of getting to be the boss.  
    You're entitled to your opinion, but I personally feel the above line is unacceptable.  It is just exasperating to me when one woman calls another woman hormonal based on a different POV.  Men can hold different opinions and and it isn't blamed on hormones, so lets not play that game here.  It is belittling. 

    I was on N15 and we did ultimately end up with structure after quite a lot of frustration caused by repeat posts over shared issues/events (eg baby shower, U/S photos, sex reveal) and we had a fantastic board.  We had individual threads where it made sense (eg a diagnosis during ultrasound, questions/concerns on a specific test result).  I'm part of a FB group with many of them and feel the same way about that BMB as you feel about yours.  While your structural experience on A15 sounds different than mine on N15, it doesn't mean we both didn't build strong relationships within our communities. I was also here pre-exodus on M14 (lurked given a late join) and it was the exact opposite of many of the BMBs today.  I've seen a pretty wide array of board formats and I genuinely feel that shared threads encourage community.  To me it is like having a discussion with friends. I get more opinions and thoughts when I engage in a dialogue with friends. Now if while they're talking about an issue in one room, I walk into a different room and have a monologue about the same issue, both groups lose out.  They don't get the extra opinion/experience and I've just missed tons of great info by isolating myself.  I just don't see why everyone needs their own "sex reveal" thread or their own "baby shower" thread.  No on in camp "do what I want when I want" can seem to give me a valid reason as to why this makes sense other than "I don't want to be told what to do" which in my opinion is merely an unfortunate perception of good intention from many members here.
    I didn't call anyone hormonal I said don't let the hormones get the best of you.  As in we are a bunch of pregnant women with a ton of hormones running through us that we aren't used to and it causes actions and reactions that we wouldn't normally have.  Same reason pregnant women cry over things that their non pregnant self wouldn't even think about.  My point is that structured threads can be good but insisting on a bunch of huge threads that most people don't have the time or energy to wade through and then policing anytime someone posts their own is not going to contribute to a vibrant and supportive community.  It's necessary on a board like ttgp where the people are constantly changing but doesn't need to be so structured in a bmb where we all stay the same.  Sure things like u/s don't all need their own threads but if someone has a scary or concerning u/s then there is no reason they can't post their own thread so it doesn't get buried.  
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