@cinderin your comments were out of place and, frankly, out of line. There is nothing wrong with planning and *gasp!* having a little fun. I hope we can all get this thread to what it was-- a fun GTKY planning exercise.
apparently my opinion riled some of you. I am sorry. that was not my intention.
my intention was to simply say that is it fine to plan and immagine but remember it sometimes doesn't work out the way you planned.
I have had more than a few friends who had emergency c/s and spend weeks/months/years upset that they felt like they failed. they didn't. some have had to seek professional help.
I sincerely hope everyone here has the exact birth experience that they want. I also hope that if they don't that they are still (mentally and physically) well.
So here's the thing. You came in to a very light hearted conversation about MUSIC and got all heavy on everyone. And you came across completely know-it-all and condescending. Many of the contributors aren't FTM, and most of the FTM are educated and intelligent women that don't need to be told that things may not go to plan. We are quite aware.
Shew. I'm glad someone said something. I read that yesterday and could do nothing else but roll my eyes. I'm not great at forming words into a cohesive thought particularly when I find something so irritating and stupid. But all of you ladies definitely said it best. I wish I could give multiple love it's for your responses.
apparently my opinion riled some of you. I am sorry. that was not my intention.
my intention was to simply say that is it fine to plan and immagine but remember it sometimes doesn't work out the way you planned.
I have had more than a few friends who had emergency c/s and spend weeks/months/years upset that they felt like they failed. they didn't. some have had to seek professional help.
I sincerely hope everyone here has the exact birth experience that they want. I also hope that if they don't that they are still (mentally and physically) well.
We are literally talking about background music. That had nothing to do with delivering vaginally or via c section cause I'm pretty sure Eye of the Tiger will sound kick ass either way.
I feel that Carry On My Wayward Son would be inspirational regardless of delivery type. Also DH loves CCR (sigh), so I'm sure some of that will make it onto the list.
Gangster Rap, Dupstep& Heavy Metal would be appropriate right? Because I'm pretty sure that's usually my workout playlist... lol
I'll probably have a lot of acoustic music. I've been listening to a Spotify playlist of songs turned acoustic and it's one of my favorites. Although I am serious about my first statement, because I do love me some heavy music when working out, I think the rural area that I live in may not be quite ready for that playlist in the birthing room.
Gangster Rap, Dupstep& Heavy Metal would be appropriate right? Because I'm pretty sure that's usually my workout playlist... lol
I'll probably have a lot of acoustic music. I've been listening to a Spotify playlist of songs turned acoustic and it's one of my favorites. Although I am serious about my first statement, because I do love me some heavy music when working out, I think the rural area that I live in may not be quite ready for that playlist in the birthing room.
apparently my opinion riled some of you. I am sorry. that was not my intention.
my intention was to simply say that is it fine to plan and immagine but remember it sometimes doesn't work out the way you planned.
I have had more than a few friends who had emergency c/s and spend weeks/months/years upset that they felt like they failed. they didn't. some have had to seek professional help.
I sincerely hope everyone here has the exact birth experience that they want. I also hope that if they don't that they are still (mentally and physically) well.
We are literally talking about background music. That had nothing to do with delivering vaginally or via c section cause I'm pretty sure Eye of the Tiger will sound kick ass either way.
This. What does music have to do with how someone delivers a child? Or their expectations regarding birth? But thanks for the sanctimony I suppose, I had *no idea* I'd have to be a parent long after I give birth. You know...FTM and all.
apparently my opinion riled some of you. I am sorry. that was not my intention.
my intention was to simply say that is it fine to plan and immagine but remember it sometimes doesn't work out the way you planned.
I have had more than a few friends who had emergency c/s and spend weeks/months/years upset that they felt like they failed. they didn't. some have had to seek professional help.
I sincerely hope everyone here has the exact birth experience that they want. I also hope that if they don't that they are still (mentally and physically) well.
We are literally talking about background music. That had nothing to do with delivering vaginally or via c section cause I'm pretty sure Eye of the Tiger will sound kick ass either way.
This. What does music have to do with how someone delivers a child? Or their expectations regarding birth? But thanks for the sanctimony I suppose, I had *no idea* I'd have to be a parent long after I give birth. You know...FTM and all.
It isn't like the right soundtrack is going to insure a perfect birth. HOWEVER, in the early stage as contractions aren't just beginning to get active it is very important to stay relaxed. I do the most talking to moms at that point in labor and a lot of it is "don't fight it", "good-relax", "get on top of it, ride it out" so death metal might not necessarily be the best choice there. Sam Smith did wonders for a client once. As labor progresses things get rhythmic, there is very much a rhythm to the process. You do not want music that is going to up and down and all around- stay in the rhythm to keep focused. Even with pain relief methods it can have a part to play... a distraction, a way to pass time, during pushing it might help to have music as opposed to a nurse counting off. I am not going to say the right music= a guarantee for a great birth, but there is a lot to be said about its "powers". Marathon runners prepare music/soundtracks to keep them ON TRACK and birth, IMO is a lot like a marathon
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
@cinderin are implying that I can still have a good relationship with my son if I don't end up listening to Toto's epic synth rock hit Africa the second he emerges from the birth canal? Cause that has been keeping me up nights with worry.
@cinderin are implying that I can still have a good relationship with my son if I don't end up listening to Toto's epic synth rock hit Africa the second he emerges from the birth canal? Cause that has been keeping me up nights with worry.
OBVIOUSLY You will not have a good relationship with your son if you don't listen to Toto's Africa right as he comes out and then lift him immediately in the air, over your head lion King style and sing along to the chorus. It has to be timed perfectly or he will start smoking in Jr. High and hate you forever. # truestory
@cinderin I really don't get where your comments are even coming from. No one was talking about having their perfect birth... it's a thread about music to have playing. I like hearing people's different music choices!
Honestly I'd never thought of making a playlist but I think it sounds like a great idea! I like the plan of having 2, 1 for relaxing and 1 with more of a beat for pushing. It's a simple thing to do and if it bothers me I can always turn it off.
Me: 33 | DH: 34 Married: October, 19, 2015 EDD 2/22/17 DS1 born on 3/2/17 EDD 3/8/20 DS2 born on 3/10/20 EDD 11/24/23 (Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
In my past experiences, I did most of the laboring at home, and just made it in time to deliver. Not necessarily ideal but until the contractions were closer together and painful, I wanted to be at home. During that whole time I stayed busy and talked on the phone lol I never even realized until this thread that music was even something to consider but I could imagine listening to music, music I like. I'm not sure if it would be helpful to me or not. But once it's go time in the hospital, I didn't want anything going on. I didn't want to hear the nurses yapping about what they were getting ready. I didn't want to hear my husband tapping his feet (he might have got scolded for that) and I think music would just further annoy me. But if I tried to listen to music, I think I'd want to go back to my younger teenage days where I feel was the funnest summer of my life. Whenever I listen to my old burned cds it makes me happy, and puts me in a different place. Back then I listened to these types... taking back sunday, the used, hawthorne heights, Yellowcard, story of the year, smile empty soul, Linkin park... seriously @peachesnbean has anyone ever listened to that stuff during any of their labor and delivery or do you think it would cause madness lol (I know each person is different, and what works for others might not work for me)
@peachesnbean oh I agree with you! I was referring to @cinderin 's odd correlation between a birth playlist thread and her diatribe on "best laid plans" when it comes to how we feel about our births.
I highly doubt someone is going to lament that their playlist didn't work out when they're holding their newborn for the first time.
So this post really inspired me to start looking at music and putting together a playlist JUST IN CASE. I love the multiple playlists that @peachesnbean outlined (thank you for that idea). Luckily, about 90% of the summer I met my now husband was based on music, and assembling playlists has been a staple of our relationship since. Every trip has a playlist. I imagine that my playlist will consist mostly of songs that are just my jam and get me jazzed up from old playlists. All of these songs bring me back to some vacation we took, and I feel like those memories would just be fantastic as a distraction. As PP have stated, if it irritates me, I can turn it off or skip songs. But some of my faves are:
Flo Rida's In the Ayer Alabama's Dixieland Delight Queen's Don't Stop me Now The Supremes' You Can't Hurry Love Volbeat's Heaven Nor Hell Rihanna's Don't Stop the Music Big & Rich's I Came to Get Down
And now looking at it, I kind of feel like @kswiger06 and wonder if this is a "normal' playlist. I think someone said theirs would all be EDM...so I maybe don't feel so weird.
@peachesnbean I didn't know you are a birth doula that is amazing! I am a FTM and have a doula for this birth (and maybe postpartum too, we'll see) and all the doulas I met with were some of the most supportive and helpful women I've ever met. What a wonderful thing to do!!
@kirstynikole you legit made me LOL. I like your vibes, girl.
I was thinking of having songs like "Just the two of us" -Will Smith "Mama" -Boyz II Men "Precious" -Depeche Mode "Isn't She Lovely" -Stevie
I was thinking they'd be inspirational to me and encourage me to keep being strong through the pain. But then again, it's highly probable I might just cry the whole time listening to these lyrics. Lol.
@cinderin wow, I hearted your comment when I read it just now, but evidently it was quite unpopular. Whoops. I can see both sides.
I can see how what you said could be defeatist. (I liked that description of it, I didn't see condescending as much as I could see some defeatist) Birth Playlists by themselves certainly aren't a 'strict plan', but this thread did made me think a bit about strict plans, and the emotional pitfalls of having really strict expectations. Music is a really light topic to chime in on this view, but I don't think there will ever be a great opening to talk about views on strict birth plans.
This is evidently an UO, but really specific, detailed birth plans make me a bit uneasy for the mom.That said, I'm sure everything will be fine soon after, no matter how much plan goes by the wayside. I've had two close friends deliver this year. Neither had super strict plans, but both were upset by the fact that they didn't "succeed". They both used that word. At least for a while, one felt almost victimized, and the other felt like she failed. I worry that people that have really restrictive plans will be more likely to be disappointed like my friends were.
I can see the rub, but you're cool with me. It was a little maudlin, maybe, but I just assumed you're more of a mother hen type than me .
Re: Birth Playlists
You came in to a very light hearted conversation about MUSIC and got all heavy on everyone.
And you came across completely know-it-all and condescending.
Many of the contributors aren't FTM, and most of the FTM are educated and intelligent women that don't need to be told that things may not go to plan.
We are quite aware.
TTC since January 2016
BFP - 3/12/16 - MC 4/5/16
BFP - 6/11/16
Oh, and Jim Croce. Lots of Jim Croce.
I'll probably have a lot of acoustic music. I've been listening to a Spotify playlist of songs turned acoustic and it's one of my favorites. Although I am serious about my first statement, because I do love me some heavy music when working out, I think the rural area that I live in may not be quite ready for that playlist in the birthing room.
Also, Wagon Wheel is a favorite of mine and Home by Edward Sharpe & the magnetic zoros
Honestly I'd never thought of making a playlist but I think it sounds like a great idea! I like the plan of having 2, 1 for relaxing and 1 with more of a beat for pushing. It's a simple thing to do and if it bothers me I can always turn it off.
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
I highly doubt someone is going to lament that their playlist didn't work out when they're holding their newborn for the first time.
Flo Rida's In the Ayer
Alabama's Dixieland Delight
Queen's Don't Stop me Now
The Supremes' You Can't Hurry Love
Volbeat's Heaven Nor Hell
Rihanna's Don't Stop the Music
Big & Rich's I Came to Get Down
And now looking at it, I kind of feel like @kswiger06 and wonder if this is a "normal' playlist. I think someone said theirs would all be EDM...so I maybe don't feel so weird.
I was thinking of having songs like
"Just the two of us" -Will Smith
"Mama" -Boyz II Men
"Precious" -Depeche Mode
"Isn't She Lovely" -Stevie
I was thinking they'd be inspirational to me and encourage me to keep being strong through the pain. But then again, it's highly probable I might just cry the whole time listening to these lyrics. Lol.
I can see how what you said could be defeatist. (I liked that description of it, I didn't see condescending as much as I could see some defeatist) Birth Playlists by themselves certainly aren't a 'strict plan', but this thread did made me think a bit about strict plans, and the emotional pitfalls of having really strict expectations. Music is a really light topic to chime in on this view, but I don't think there will ever be a great opening to talk about views on strict birth plans.
This is evidently an UO, but really specific, detailed birth plans make me a bit uneasy for the mom.That said, I'm sure everything will be fine soon after, no matter how much plan goes by the wayside. I've had two close friends deliver this year. Neither had super strict plans, but both were upset by the fact that they didn't "succeed". They both used that word. At least for a while, one felt almost victimized, and the other felt like she failed. I worry that people that have really restrictive plans will be more likely to be disappointed like my friends were.
I can see the rub, but you're cool with me. It was a little maudlin, maybe, but I just assumed you're more of a mother hen type than me
Married: 10/10
EDD: 8/27/16 MMC 1/16
Rainbow Boy: 2/04/17
TTC: 4/18 BFP: 1/2/19
EDD: 9/6/19
They still asked if I wanted music in the OR.
Just saying.
I was mainly responding to @cinderin 's pounding. I haven't even worked on my birthplan yet.
Married: 10/10
EDD: 8/27/16 MMC 1/16
Rainbow Boy: 2/04/17
TTC: 4/18 BFP: 1/2/19
EDD: 9/6/19