New kid on the block

JuliaGoolia719 · September 2016

Hi ladies! I've been lurking a little bit lately and thought I'd quit being a creep and let you all know I was here lol.
DH and I are both 33, we met at a mutual friends wedding in 2006, got married in 2009 (7 yrs as of the 25th this month). I went off BCP in Feb 2015, I was diagnosed w Hashimotos and PCOS in 2009. I travel extensively for work (up to 23 days at a time) so we didn't think much of not having any success in the baby department for a while, I went to my OB in Dec 2015 and she started doing CD 21 day blood draws to see my progesterone level and if I was ovulating. Based on the levels she didn't think I was so we tried Femara a few times, with inconclusive results. Prior to going off BCP I also found out I have a gluten allergy and cut that out, which did have a positive impact, I went from not having a period at all without BCP to having one regularly, albeit longer than normal cycles. In Aug I went and had a pelvic ultrasound and HSG, the HSG came back fine and the ultrasound showed some cysts from the PCOS but also indicated that I am ovulating at some point in my cycle, just not when my OB thought I should be (based on when she was testing my progesterone). She referred me to a RE based on the ultrasound info and we went in today for our first appointment.
DH hadn't been tested at all yet, since the indications were that I was the issue not him, until the semen analysis today. He had low numbers across the board which is discouraging. They scheduled a follow up for him in 3 weeks to see if anything changes, but the nurse practitioner said that unless his levels more than double that our only option will be IVF.
I'm not sure the odds of his numbers going up by that much.....I'm new to this whole side of the process, I always thought that having kids would happen on its own once we stopped trying, even w the PCOS I never really considered the possibility that we might not be able to have biological kids-- and I know we're not anywhere close to that conclusion yet-- but the RE visit today really made me stop and consider that possibility.
(I didn't know I had a login for this site until today..and I can't see what my "handle" is..so if my name is totally obnoxious or weird please assume it was from when I was on the knot....most of my log ins from that age now make me shake my head in a "oh what was I thinking" kind of way)

MMD1986 · September 2016

Welcome @JuliaGoolia719! Sorry you find yourself here, but this is a great place to come for support and advice as you go on this journey.

JuliaGoolia719 · September 2016

Thanks @MMD1986!

ltlavac · September 2016

Welcome to the "club," this board has been a great support and wealth of information over the years. Best of luck to you! Love your name, my daughter is a Julia

Elyse1384 · September 2016

Welcome. Sorry your journey TTC has landed you here, but hopefully your stay is short and helpful

beary67 · September 2016

Welcome! I hope your stay here is short!

cato99 · September 2016

Welcome! We also chalked up our failure to conceive to travel schedules for the longest time! It took us almost 3 years to seek serious intervention (we were a little in denial) so you're much more on top of things than we were: you're on the right track!

I know the IVF step seems daunting but it really is the best way to circumvent some of the issues you're describing. I've found these boards to be immensely helpful so I wish you the best of luck, we're here to support you!

APM_SLP · September 2016

Hi there! We also deal with male factor infertility (among other issues with myself). The nice thing about MFI is the availability of using ICSI. My hubby has severely low morphology and count, and semi low motility, and we were still able to successfully fertilize 13 out of 17 eggs which were initially retrieved.

We re-tested him as well, a couple months after the initial test. His numbers did improve, but not enough. I think the increase had to do with me making him stop drinking as much between tests- but that's just my opinion

. Science is amazing and IVF/ICSI is pretty incredible. Don't be discouraged. There are lots of success stories happening here, and I plan on being one of them very soon! Good luck!

mrsdaddario · September 2016

Welcome!

Also, as The Wedding Singer is one of my favorite movies, don't change your name!! I got the reference immediately and love it!

lady_grey · September 2016

welcome @JuliaGoolia719! I'm sorry you are here but also glad that you found us. I hope you find lots of information and support! Good luck to you.

Marley629 · September 2016

Welcome @JuliaGoolia719. I echo the sentiments of above posters in that I am sorry you find yourself here, but am glad you found us and we can provide support. I hope your stay here is short. I am in a similiar situation with my husbands SA and we will be repeating on 9/23 in hopes for much better numbers as well. Good luck!

latershrader · September 2016

Welcome @JuliaGoolia719! I'm sorry you have to hang out here with us, but hopefully you find some useful information. Did your RE give you a plan of attack yet?

Bababatty · September 2016

Welcome, @juliagoolia719! I'm a bit late to this thread but wanted to chime in because we're dealing with MFI, too--in DH's case, low motility. I don't know what your DH's numbers are, but it's possible you don't need to jump right into IVF. Even though DH's motile count after the wash was only 2.6 million (RE had wanted 4 million), our RE encouraged us to keep trying IUI for a few more cycles. We actually went in specifically to talk to him about this because we were so discouraged after the first IUI.

TL;DR I'd talk to your RE about the probability of IUI success with your PCOS coupled with DH's numbers, and whether it makes sense to jump into IVF right away. Good luck!

JuliaGoolia719 · September 2016

Thank you all so much for the welcome and the suggestions! I went MIA for a bit because my grandfather passed away. I am the only family member who lives in town (it was my dad's dad and my dad passed away from cancer in 2015), so it was a bit of a stressful month around here.

DH goes back in for another analysis on the 26th, so we're hoping for improvement. He's basically quit drinking all together (from 1-2 drinks a night down to 1-2 drinks per week) and has been making it to the gym about every other day since our first appointment. Most of my blood work has come back and my numbers look ok, my AMH is low (I think) at 3.9 but everything else came back at "normal" based on my interwebs searching.

So now we're at the hurry up and wait part, I am excited we are going to Chicago for a few days after DH's test next Monday, its been great to have something positive to focus on!

skysong113 · September 2016

Sorry to hear about your grandfather! Hopefully Chicago will be great- I've been there twice and loved it both times. FX that your DH's analysis will look better, and good luck with your next steps!

Zoey1019 · September 2016

@JuliaGoolia719 FX for improvement on your DH's SA, but I just wanted to point out that your AMh is not low at 3.9! That is perfectly normal, you may even overstim a bit... of course speak with your doctor to confirm, but I would definetly not call you low.

See below:
https://www.advancedfertility.com/amh-fertility-test.htm

JuliaGoolia719 · September 2016

hmmmm maybe I wrote it down wrong, I was on the online portal looking at my blood work results (and googling what was normal bc for some reason it wasn't showing up, yay technology issues) it was either my AMH or my LH that was low, but I was reading it was not unusual for that to be the case w PCOS....I was a little overwhelmed w all the results and googling.

puppyluv13 · October 2016

@juliagoolia719

your screen name!

MH had low numbers as well when we did our medicated cycles and IUI in 2014... My RE didn't seem to concerned with DH side of things. So we decided this time around he would go to a urologist in conjunction with me seeing my RE. He is taking Arimidex to try and improve his count, which his doc said would increase our chances to get PG. So it was refreshing to get another opinion, or additional help, before jumping on the IVF wagon (which is where my RE said we may end up this time around). I'd like to exhaust the cheaper options before facing something that will cost $15k+.

JuliaGoolia719 · October 2016

Thanks!

We got his 2nd round of testing back and *yay* his numbers improved, but *boo* the nurse said that they are still too low to try anything besides IVF. DH saw a urologist and he put him on something for his testosterone, (said his # was within the normal range, but on the low end) so he will go back in another few weeks and see if that is having any impact.

My biggest concern is that once we address this issue we still have to deal w me and my PCOS, hypothyroid, irregular ovulation issues....we have enough to try IVF once (well one egg retrieval and the (hopefully multiple options for transfers). After that we're tapped and neither of our insurances covers anything past "infertility diagnosis".

puppyluv13 · October 2016

@juliagoolia719 Yeah that is what DH is taking too.. It has something to do with turning estrogen into testosterone or something like that. His doc said that it would take about 2-3 months before we saw any improvement...

FX that it works for you guys!!!!

Polythene Pam · October 2016

Welcome! First I'm so glad your husband willingly tested! It seems like men shy away from this. We just went to dinner with a couple that went through IVF for male infertility, and now have two healthy kids (2 years apart). It seems like there's many options these days, all helping to get you guys that baby

JuliaGoolia719 · October 2016

@polythenepam I wasn't surprised that he got tested per say, I was (pleasantly) surprised when he found out his #'s weren't great that he immediately cut back to like 1 drink a week and started meeting with our trainer 2-3x a week without me having to suggest anything.

I have to admit that until this point I wasn't sure how much he was really wanting to go through all of this, he's a pretty typical guy when it comes to talking about all of this. He will answer questions if I ask but he's not one to initiate the convo or just pipe up with his feelings about it.

sasha29-2 · October 2016

We thought the same thing with travel schedules for a while, and at the time I'd gotten stuck with a horrid doctor at my regular OBGYN who didn't listen to me about anything, so for almost 2 years after I suspected something was up she flat out refused to send me to an RE, blaming the travel schedule.

Also, there may be ways to up your husband's numbers, he should probably go to a urologist to get a full workup. We did that and bypassed the clinic I'm working with, which supremely pissed them off, but DH's doc said RE's don't generally test men early enough or extensively enough to justify putting women through what we go through, and judging by what my RE said to do and what the urologist actually did, his doc was 100% right. His urologist started him on a little tiny pill for I forget what, and his counts have SOARED (not to mention he has more energy). It's definitely worth looking into, and he should be able to get the referral from his PCP pretty easy.

JuliaGoolia719 · October 2016

@sasha29 we went into our first appt with the RE thinking that the issue was with me, my OB had suggested getting DH tested back in Dec but she was also telling me that I wasn't ovulating at all and trying different things to try and get that going on its own so we didn't think about it too much. We figured the issue was with me and left it at that.

The last test my OB ordered for me before referring us to the RE was an HSG (came back fine) and a pelvic ultrasound, which showed some signs of PCOS but nothing too bad. They did say it looked like I had ovulated on my left side pretty recently and that my right side had some cysts that might prevent me ovulating on that side. The RE did another pelvic ultrasound (literally 35 days after the first one) and said it looked like I ovulated on my R side that month. DH got tested right before our appt and got his results back as we were talking w the RE, so we suddenly went from me having all the issues to him being the focus. The RE referred him to a urologist that day and said based on the results from that we could move forward, and also had him come back in 3 weeks later for a 2nd analysis. The urologist said that everything looked fine, did some additional blood work and the only thing that came back "wonky" was that his testosterone was on the low end of normal. So now he's taking something for that and will go back for another analysis in about 4 weeks to see if his numbers are going up. The RE's office said that it can take 3-4 months for that to impact in a significant way, but I'm REALLY hoping that they start to improve even a little more.

I felt so bad for him when we got his #'s back, he was devastated. He said he felt so bad that I'd been making all these lifestyle changes and monthly blood work etc trying to fix what we thought was wrong and he didn't even consider it might be with him. I'd much rather have the issue be with me, I've already been dealing with thinking it was all me for the last 18 mos (either my schedule or my body just not cooperating AT ALL) and I've processed all those emotions. I just hate that he is feeling any part of that.

My RE's office doesn't seem concerned about me too much, once we see if DH's #'s go up enough that anything besides IVF is an option I'm wondering if they will start to do more testing on me....

sasha29-2 · October 2016

@JuliaGoolia719 Ugh, my heart hurts for him, for both of you. It can be really hard on guys, finding out that part or all of the problem is with them, it threatens their manhood and I feel like there's even less support for them than there is for us. My husband definitely wigged out a little when all his stuff came back less than perfect; no men in his family have ever had a hard time having kids. Meanwhile, fertility and reproductive issues run deep for the women in my family. He just always assumed the issue would be on my end. Of course, it appears that there are still significant issues on my end, since now all his stuff is good, but it still hit him pretty hard I think.

I feel like it's unlikely you'll have to do any more real testing; the only testing they did on me was the HSG, ultrasounds, and blood work. I mean, you'll definitely be getting more ultrasounds and bloodwork if you do IVF, but as far as I know, the HSG is really the only big test otherwise.

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