Pregnancy / Delivery Fears

MrsBakes · August 2016

Do you have any pregnancy or delivery fears? I thought it would be maybe helpful and sometimes funny to read some of those? Some are certainly very legit and scary, but some are maybe just "funny"?

I had a wonderful pregnancy with my DD. But I passed out while a nurse in training was trying to put in an IV in my forearm. Blood was just coming it fountain waves and I passed out LOL. So now I'm scared of that.

I'm also still scared of pooping all over the place. Didn't happen with DD so I feel like my chances have just increased by 150%. Another one is tearing. I had a very minor tear first time around but I pushed for over 3 hrs with plenty of time to stretch. They say second babies come quicker so....

As far as the current pregnancy goes, I'm having a lot of palpitations this time around whereas I had none with DD. (I have 3 different kinds of arrhythmia and had a surgery years ago, too.) But it can come back at any time and I'm a bit concerned that it will give me more serious trouble as I'm feeling faint quite often...

KirstinH88 · August 2016

With DS I didn't really know what to expect, so the whole thing was scary for me. I made it to the hospital and was already 8cm, so I had to literally BEG for a epidural. But the delivery and recovery went fairly well. I think because I have one under my belt, I'm a lot less nervous this go around, but you never know, every delivery is different! I'm going to play it all by ear, but hopefully go natural this time.

smallanimal · August 2016

oh gosh, what fear do I not have?? Seriously, I am the worst possible worry there is. Is it viable? I am not going to lose it, right?? Am I eating right? Am I sleeping right? Am I travelling right? Am I lifting right? Am I doing too much? Too little? Am I drinking enough? Are my symptoms ok? Are they too much? When to worry? .. and that's just right now in the moment.. Then there come all the "what ifs"...

Right now the biggest worry is m/c, always - but getting gradually better at trying to chill. For now I am not afraid of delivery - I can do that.. I dont care how difficult.. just let the baby be ok...!!

Ladybug'sMama · August 2016

Apart from the health of the baby, my biggest delivery fear is that the epidural won't work or the baby will come too fast and I won't have the option to get an epidural. This is my second baby. Everything went fairly smoothly the first time around except that the epidural started to wear off on one side. I was not mentally prepared to have an unmedicated birth. Fortunately they redid it and it worked perfectly.

A perhaps less rational fear is that I'll deliver on the train (which I take to work).

KirstinH88 · August 2016

Ladybug's Mama said:
A perhaps less rational fear is that I'll deliver on the train (which I take to work).

That too! I worked pretty much up until I gave birth to DS. I worked Friday, he was born Sunday. I plan on doing it again, but what if it happens on a weekday?! My water didn't break with DS (most women's water doesn't), but I always think what if it does?!?

herewegrow · August 2016

This is the third for us so my biggest fear is not getting to the hospital in time. My first I was induced and pushed for 5+ hours but my second I went into labor on my own and was a 7 when I got to the ER. Flew to 9 in an hour and almost missed my window for epidural.

Also, your endless worries are totally normal, just try to keep yourself calm with facts and learning what to expect. You're meant to do this @smallanimal

allybadry · August 2016

First time I around I was really nervous but it did seem to just happen naturally, I don't know if I have any fears this time around. Maybe that it won't be as easy as it was last time.

My first labour was fast and intense. I went from 2 to 5 cm in about 3 hours and 5 to 10 cm in about 45 minutes. Only twenty minutes of pushing and then I had a baby in my arms. They didn't have time for an epi so I had almost no pain meds (I had been given a bit of morphine when I was at 2 cm because contractions were killing me, but I wasn't admitted because they figured I had hours upon hours before I would even be close to delivering).

@MrsBakes I had a partial third degree tear, and it wasn't so bad as far as being ripped in two goes. I had a little bit of shock right after delivery, and they gave me suppository pain killers for the 24 hours following. After that it was really just tylenol and voltaren, a few stool softeners and I was as good as new in 3-4 weeks. I know its scary to think about, but I didn't even feel it happen (I didn't actually know until I overheard the OB and nurses talking).

Ladybug'sMama · August 2016

@KirstinH88 I just hope we aren't the subject of a news story about a woman giving birth on public transportation. Although there was an article about some baby getting a million airline miles because the mom delivered on the plane. I guess there could be some benefit...

catem07 · August 2016

I'm just choosing not to read anything about delivery right now. Blinders.

mylittleirvz · August 2016

I agree @smallanimal, as long as the baby is ok, I can get through whatever.

That being said, I am a little nervous about delivery as I live about 40 min away from where I go to deliver and my first labor/delivery was FAST. Like less than 3 hours from checking into the hospital to baby in my arms (I worked through contractions for a couple hours at home before her office opened and I could call her). The doctor joked with me if I had a second I might want to move to the town she's in!

So I'm nervous that either A) what if it's even faster as they say second babies tend to be and I wait too long at home or what if it's not as easy as my first one was? Oh well, whatever happens will happen and I will get through it!

chelle087 · August 2016

@Ladybug's Mama, my epidural only worked on half of my body also! They weren't able to fix it, just had me shift my weight from one side to the other, at which point the side that the epidural was working on switched too! It was really strange.

Aside from that, I had a very easy labor, delivery, and recovery so I am hoping for the same this time around. I really try not to worry about it too much. When I called my doctor to let her know I was in labor the first time around (we are supposed to call before going to the hospital) she told me that I didn't sound panicked enough to be in labor. Lol.

BeachMommy2B · August 2016

I do have some labor related fears, as I will have to have a C section this time around.

However, my main pregnancy related fear currently is Zika. I live in central florida and there have been confirmed cases of Zika that have not been travel related in Miami. That's about 4 hours south of me, but its till pretty scary. My fiance and my mom have basically banned me from going outside in the evening when you're most likely to get bit.

MrsBakes · August 2016

@BeachMommy2B

The Zika thing is scary

shoegirl1975 · August 2016

@BeachMommy2B We are in CFL too. I traveled to the Caribbean and had a Zika test done, that came back clear...but now it is starting to get closer to us...I am paranoid..we are supposed to go to St Pete this weekend, I already have my OFF packed!

holzie-2 · August 2016

smallanimal I feel the EXACT same way. My biggest fear is having to have a C section or deliver in an OR because of the twin thing. But I guess as long as they are healthy that's all that matters.

BeachMommy2B · August 2016

shoegirl1975 said:

@BeachMommy2B We are in CFL too. I traveled to the Caribbean and had a Zika test done, that came back clear...but now it is starting to get closer to us...I am paranoid..we are supposed to go to St Pete this weekend, I already have my OFF packed!

I know, Fiance and I like to go to Miami for our birthdays in October, but we will be foregoing it this year for sure! I'm sad because I love walking on the beach at night, but its one of the places I actually get bit the most during twilight so i'm going to stay clear for now.

peachy0709 · August 2016

I am terrified of zika as well. Why is it such a jerk?

I had all the horrors during my delivery - first, we thought my water had broken and I was just advancing very, very slowly. Finally after 17 (SEVENTEEN) hours of labor, they checked again after my epidural had gone in and MY WATER WAS STILL IN TACT, JUST LEAKING. They asked if I wanted it broken. WHAT DO YOU THINK. Labored for another 11 hours before pushing for four. Had to go to the OR after for stitches. DH was left in the room all alone with DD and he pretty much panicked. So I'm here to tell you NO MATTER WHAT, you will survive and it will be great and you'll have a squish!!! at the end!

Dannylion24 · August 2016

My biggest worry (one that already is keeping me up at night) is having childcare for my other kids when I go into labor. At this point I'm pretty much expecting that I'll be leaving my DH with the kids and taking myself to the hospital since my parents are 3 hours away (and depending on whether I deliver early might be in Florida still w my sister who is due 3/12) and my inlaws (closest relatives) are over an hour away (and they went on vacation during my last delivery). I have neighbors that could come over in an absolute emergency, but they work and have kids so that's not a simple option.

Also; 4 births, 4 epidurals, and only 2 worked. So I've been through it without pain management and I don't want to do it again.

edit; missing words.

MrsBakes · August 2016

Dannylion24 said:

My biggest worry (one that already is keeping me up at night) is having childcare for my other kids. At this point I'm pretty much expecting that I'll be leaving my DH with the kids and taking myself to the hospital since my parents are 3 hours away (and depending on whether I deliver early might be in Florida still w my sister who is due 3/12) and my inlaws (closest relatives) are over an hour away (and they went on vacation during my last delivery). I have neighbors that could come over in an absolute emergency, but they work and have kids so that's not a simple option.

Also; 4 births, 4 epidurals, and only 2 worked. So I've been through it without pain management and I don't want to do it again.

Woah, that is tough.. all of it! I hope there will be a solution and your H can come with you!

ladameperdue · August 2016

All of this, especially Zika, not making it to hospital in time or having to go with a toddler in tow (would they let her stay?), and most of all, growing evidence that taking an SSRI in the third trimester increases risk of respiratory problems for baby at birth. I need my SSRI. Two midwives already said they advise against homebirth and I am risked out of birth center because of it. Bummed.

Ekzerr · August 2016

Definitely worried my water will break at work! Went on Mat leave 2 weeks before due date with DD and she ends up being born at 42+1...

also worried/nervous about recovery...had an episiotomy and third degree tear with DD and the few days after weren't very enjoyable. Lesson learned: when they say use the sitz bath, use it! It's not as scary as it may seem

pinkshades05 · August 2016

I'm most worried about childcare for my kids as we have no family where we live. I have a friend who stepped up and offered to watch overnight but she works as a teacher during the day.

My other fear is baby bring born in the car. We arrived at the birth center at 2:52am and DD2 was born at 3:11am. I labored for 6 hours total! Including early labor.

belocin · August 2016

@BeachMommy2B @shoegirl1975 Same here! Central FL res and so nervous about Zika.

Im also nervous about missing the epidural again. I was an 8 by the time I got to the hospital and there wasn't time for the epi. I survived but not sure I want to willingly go natural again.

My thoughts right now are mostly consumed with wondering if baby is okay in there. Symptoms come and go and that's all there really is to go on until the bump appears. For now, it's anxiously waiting for the first appointment next week and kicking myself for not writing down my symptoms (or lack thereof) my first go round with DD.

Beckyf321 · August 2016

I don't know why, but I'm terrified of having a c-section. I guess because my first two were vaginal deliveries and my recovery was fairly quick.

@MrsBakes, with my first I got a second degree tear. With my second, I didn't tear at all and he was a pound bigger!

asjas15 · August 2016

I am terrified of delivery this time. DD was so easy I pushed for 3 hours but had no tears or scarring so Im afraid of what might happen the next time around... oh and the hemorrhoids...

STM2017 · August 2016

My biggest fear is the same as it was with DS. I have some previous trauma that makes getting checked really hard for me. I had planned a med-free birth with DS but ended up with an epidural because the doctors couldn't check my dilation properly. So my biggest fear is that I'll go through that same ordeal again, and end up with epidural not because of pain but because of my history

That and having another 30 hour labour. They say the second one is supposed to come faster. I hope so!!!

BeachMommy2B · August 2016

STM2017 said:

My biggest fear is the same as it was with DS. I have some previous trauma that makes getting checked really hard for me. I had planned a med-free birth with DS but ended up with an epidural because the doctors couldn't check my dilation properly. So my biggest fear is that I'll go through that same ordeal again, and end up with epidural not because of pain but because of my history

That and having another 30 hour labour. They say the second one is supposed to come faster. I hope so!!!

That's terrible. I'm sorry something like that happened, it has to be so rough going through pregnancy. I hope you feel more comfortable this time since you will have a better understanding about what's happening to you.

STM2017 · August 2016

@BeachMommy2B, thank you. I appreciate your kind words!

NESeattlite · August 2016

@pinkshades05 @Dannylion24 I have the same worries about who's going to watch our toddler. All family is a 6 hour flight away and while we have friends and neighbors in a pinch I'd feel a lot less comfortable dragging them out of work or waking in the middle of the night. My mom will come a few days before my due date and I hope that's sufficient, DS was right on time!

Risalyn222 · August 2016

I'm terrified of a third csection. I'm pretty sure I don't have much of a choice though.

clickclackmoo · August 2016

I'm so sorry you have that history, @STM2017.

I'm scared of something happening to the baby and of the epidural (not enough NOT to get the epidural though). Last time around I was scared of induction. Guess who got an induction?

STM2017 · August 2016

Thank you @clickclackmoo

I was also scared of induction. The night before I went into labour I made DH take me for a long, bumpy car ride. I seriously think it induced my labour lol

Ekzerr · August 2016

@clickclackmoo same! I was terrified and ended up being induced at 42+1

Dannylion24 · August 2016

Thanks @mrsbakes by a minor miracle we were able to time things right for my mom to help us out w the older 3 when my last baby was born (mom made arrangements to visit and I went in for a membrane sweep when I was 39 weeks bc of leg circulation/varicose veins and it was successful in kickstarting my labor - had baby 4 12 hours later), but I seriously doubt that we will get that lucky again. The added conflict is that my sister is due two weeks ahead of me w her #2 and all 3 of us live in different parts of the east coast. Anyways, here's hoping my inlaws decide not to take too many trips that month and can help in a jam.

@pinkshades05 and @NESeattlite fingers crossed for you ladies with your childcare worries!

belocin · August 2016

@Dannylion24 oh man, membrane sweep. Effective but OUCH!

Dannylion24 · August 2016

belocin said:

@Dannylion24 oh man, membrane sweep. Effective but OUCH!

allybadry · August 2016

@STM2017 Checks are hard enough, I can only imagine what it must feel like for you. I'm really sorry you weren't able to have the delivery you wanted the first time around. I hope you are able to get the delivery you want this time.

STM2017 · August 2016

@allybadry, thank you. In the end I had a healthy, beautiful little boy. And that's all that matters. I'm trying to go in with an open mind this time and remember that if I end up with an epidural again, it's okay. As long as baby is healthy!

Cook3133 · August 2016

Fear: having another long labor and even bigger baby.

baby 1- 6 hours, 15 min of pushing, epidural in hospital, completely ripped inside, too many stitches to count. 8.5# baby. On due date

baby 2- 17 wks of contractions, labor was 6 hours, 1 1/2 pushes, 8.15# baby, epidural in hospital. 30 min after due date

baby 3- 3 hour labor, baby came out, Ned free at a birthing center, 8.7# baby. Day early

baby 4- 17 hour labor, 30-45 min hard pushing, baby was twisting as he was coming out, birthing center med free, 5 days early, 9.10# baby

Cupcakes89 · August 2016

I'm terrified that I will feel them cutting me open again... yes again... and I won't be able to be awake for the babies birth again. It caused me so much PPD. I have nightmares about it already! I worry I'll have the baby early and naturally and won't have the option of an epidural. Pain sucks... bad.