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April 2016 Moms
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What would you do?

Sarcasm101Sarcasm101 member
in April 2016 Moms
I dropped my son off at daycare this morning. And I noticed another mom parking her car, her son was in the front seat of her SUV. Her son is about 4 years old and small for his age. There was no carseat/ booster seat in the car. I have noticed twice before but I have never said anything. I don't know this woman or her son, I don't even know their names. I have not said anything to this woman but now I feel almost guilty for not speaking up. I don't want to mommy-shame but this is just dangerous. 

What would you do? 

**** Formerly Snoflakes4eva****

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Re: What would you do?

  • runningwildrunningwild member
    Honestly, my first thought is to bring it to the daycare's attention and let them handle it. 
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  • yodiggityyodiggity member
    Agree with PP. I would speak directly with the manager (or whoever is in charge) of the daycare. I'm sure it's something that has come up before and/or they have a specific protocol.
    image 
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  • WBORDERSWBORDERS member
    I agree, bring it up to the daycare and let them handle it. 
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  • MissingchampagneMissingchampagne member
    Daycares are mandated reporters, so if they feel a child's safety is at risk they are legally obligated to say something. It may be that the child actually just barely hit the height requirement, and it's hard to tell. 
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  • BrittnyS10BrittnyS10 member
    Missingchampagne said:
    It may be that the child actually just barely hit the height requirement, and it's hard to tell. 
    The CDC says anyone under the age of 13 is supposed to be in the back seat. I doubt a 4-year old would be tall enough to meet the height requirements, but they sure are a LONG ways away from the propper age. 
    I would say something to the daycare providers. They should know how to handle that sort of situation.
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  • MissingchampagneMissingchampagne member
    edited August 2016
    BrittnyS10 said:
    Missingchampagne said:
    It may be that the child actually just barely hit the height requirement, and it's hard to tell. 
    The CDC says anyone under the age of 13 is supposed to be in the back seat. I doubt a 4-year old would be tall enough to meet the height requirements, but they sure are a LONG ways away from the propper age. 
    I would say something to the daycare providers. They should know how to handle that sort of situation.
    My bad, I just read the part about the booster seat missing and reacted to that. 
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  • korpatchkorpatch member
    I sat in the font seat without a booster at age 4. I remember that as soon as my dad would drop off my brother at kindergarten Imy dad would lay down the front set and I would climb over to the font seat and ride home with him. It wasn't till I was 11 that we got a car that had the new requirements posted on them and that I wasn't allowed to sit up there till I was 12.
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  • korpatchkorpatch member
    So I just looked up the rules and they vary by state... Kansas is WAY more lenient than what you all are saying. Booster seat only till 8 or 80lb and 4'9" or if only a lap belt is available. It doesn't look like there is even any law about sitting in the front or back. It is suggested that they ride in the back until 13 but it isn't a law.

    (I know the child in question is much younger than what I've listed... I'm just saying it may be different by state.... I don't know...)
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  • korpatchkorpatch member
    www.ghsa.org/html/stateinfo/laws/childsafety_laws.html
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  • korpatchkorpatch member
    Also 
    www.iihs.org/iihs/topics/laws/safetybeltuse 

    that at one has a bit more into.
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  • Sarcasm101Sarcasm101 member
    korpatch said:
    So I just looked up the rules and they vary by state... Kansas is WAY more lenient than what you all are saying. Booster seat only till 8 or 80lb and 4'9" or if only a lap belt is available. It doesn't look like there is even any law about sitting in the front or back. It is suggested that they ride in the back until 13 but it isn't a law.

    (I know the child in question is much younger than what I've listed... I'm just saying it may be different by state.... I don't know...)
    This kid is 4. He is no where close to 40 pounds or being 4'9". And he is not even in a booster seat. 

    The manager of the daycare said something to the mom yesterday. The mom said the airbag was disabled so it was fine. I saw them the morning and the kid was still in the front seat. 

    In IL (where we are) the child must be in a child safety seat until at least 7. And can use a regular seat belt at 8 years old, only if the child weights 40+ pounds. 

    Do I just let it go? Ask the manager to say somethings again? Bud out?

    **** Formerly Snoflakes4eva****

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  • yodiggityyodiggity member
    Sarcasm101 said:
    This kid is 4. He is no where close to 40 pounds or being 4'9". And he is not even in a booster seat. 

    The manager of the daycare said something to the mom yesterday. The mom said the airbag was disabled so it was fine. I saw them the morning and the kid was still in the front seat. 

    In IL (where we are) the child must be in a child safety seat until at least 7. And can use a regular seat belt at 8 years old, only if the child weights 40+ pounds. 

    Do I just let it go? Ask the manager to say somethings again? Bud out?
    qbf:

    I would say that you have done your diligence. The mom was informed of the potential problem and has decided not to do anything about it (or maybe will research further, hopefully). Nothing that you can do further.
    image 
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  • ivyvines6ivyvines6 member
    yodiggity said:
    Sarcasm101 said:
    This kid is 4. He is no where close to 40 pounds or being 4'9". And he is not even in a booster seat. 

    The manager of the daycare said something to the mom yesterday. The mom said the airbag was disabled so it was fine. I saw them the morning and the kid was still in the front seat. 

    In IL (where we are) the child must be in a child safety seat until at least 7. And can use a regular seat belt at 8 years old, only if the child weights 40+ pounds. 

    Do I just let it go? Ask the manager to say somethings again? Bud out?
    qbf:

    I would say that you have done your diligence. The mom was informed of the potential problem and has decided not to do anything about it (or maybe will research further, hopefully). Nothing that you can do further.
    Ugh... This mom reminds me of my sister who refuses to use car seats after three because "they're a pain in the ass." She's been yelled at about it several times, and we've all sent her information about how unsafe it is, but she doesn't care. Unfortunately you can't fix every dumb parent out there :disappointed:
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  • loveymayloveymay member
    Isnt it illegal not to use car seats/booster seats? Could that be child endangerment or something?
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  • linzoirvlinzoirv member
    edited August 2016
    @loveymay In Florida, they just give out citations.
    You can also get points on your license.

    ETA & clarify:

    Car Seats and Booster Seats

    • Children ages 0-3, such restraint devices must be a separate carrier or a vehicle manufacturer’s integrated child seat.
    • Children ages 4-5, the restraint device should be a separate carrier, an integrated child seat or a child booster seat.
    • The best child seat is one that fits your child, fits your car and that drivers will use correctly every time. Read the car seat’s instruction manual and the portion of your vehicle’s owner manual when you install a car seat.
    • Visit a local FHP station to ask a car-seat certified trooper to help you install your seat.
    • Remember to check for car and booster seat recalls.
    • Learn more
    More info: https://www.flhsmv.gov/safety-center/vehicle-and-child-safety/child-safety/

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  • horseloverhorselover member
    Call the police non-emergency line. Tell them all this and what time the mom drops off. They can wait outside and pull her over. This is what the private school I work at does if parents don't comply. I know I would feel  awful if this kid got hurt and I hadn't done all I could. I'm surprised the daycare isn't doing more, as the previous poster said, they should be mandatory reporters.
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  • AGK2015AGK2015 member
    edited August 2016
    Skip 311, call 911 when you see them get in their car (IIRC, you're in my city, and I 100% guarantee you that 311 would make you call 911 anyway,  so you might as well save the step).  While it may not seem like a conventional emergency, think of it as reckless driving; you wouldn't call 311 for somebody weaving dangerously through traffic, or if you knew that someone was getting behind the wheel drunk. If you're only seeing them at drop-off, though,  your hands may need tied (shy of asking other parents you know to keep an eye out and do the same, or just confronting the parent yourself). 
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