PGAL-Brain Rant

liepertsm · August 2016

If this doesn't belong here, I'm sorry. Maybe it would be better on the PGAL board, but I haven't been as active there and feel like I have gotten to know you ladies more over here.

I'm just having an awful PGAL-brain day. I'm on antibiotics for a UTI for the second time this pregnancy. I'm on the fifth of seven days and don't really feel better. I've talked to the Dr. who did a culture and said it was nothing out of the ordinary, so to finish what I'm taking now and they would call to check in on how I'm doing then. I'm just frustrated and every little thing makes me worry that something is/could go wrong.

So for the rest of the day I'm trying to just take it easy, think happy thoughts, and wait another excruciating three weeks until my next appt. to hear that little heartbeat again. Sorry again for the rant.

BaylieGirl · August 2016

I totally understand. I spent all day googling and stalking obsessively people who also were measuring 4 days small on their first ultrasound. It put me in such a crappy mood and my husband is so mad that I can't just relax and be happy he heard a heartbeat this time around. These next 3 weeks till my next Ultrasound are going to be excruciating!

Foersty · August 2016

I'm with you. My PGAL brain has been in overdrive today. My 12 week appointment is tomorrow and I have been emotional all day, going back and forth between such wonderful excitement and terrible anxiety and dread.
I try to remind myself to think happy thoughts, refocus on the positive, and try to stay calm/patient.
I hope that you feel better and that the next couple weeks fly by!

liepertsm · August 2016

I'm a googler too @BaylieGirl I know I shouldn't do it because it always makes me feel worse. Can't help it. Hope the next weeks go quickly for you!

Thanks @Foersty ...that's how I'm feeling too. Super excited, but then super worried and scared.

pinnerk · August 2016

Also with you ! Its so hard to shake the feeling that something could go wrong again.
I don't know if I should feel comfort in the fact that I had a missed miscarriage before so no real symptoms. When I get these feelings, I wrote them down on a piece of paper and then I shred it. That's the only thing that helps me.

Nursegalqc · August 2016

I'm scared every time I go to the bathroom that when I wipe I will see red, wish I could get over that and constantly nudging my breast to make sure it still hurts.
Antibiotics are set up to work for the amount of time after you take them, so if you have a 7 day course of antibiotics they are working for 14 days and unfortunately may take that long for your symptoms to resolve, I suggest drinking cranberry juice or taking cranberry capsules to help improve urinary health.

JustAnotherUsername16 · August 2016

Nursegalqc said:

I'm scared every time I go to the bathroom that when I wipe I will see red, wish I could get over that and constantly nudging my breast to make sure it still hurts.

YES! I do the exact same thing and then I realize I'm intentionally causing myself pain as a sign of reassurance and feel like a crazy person. Also, I cannot go to the bathroom without carefully examining the toilet paper after I wipe. PGAL brain is the absolute worst.

It helps to know we aren't alone and we have a strong community of women supporting us.

dubcompanion · August 2016

@liepertsm I hope you have a better PgAL day today. It's seriously all about one day at a time. I'm now into my 11th week, and I've noticed that when I sense sudden wetness down there, I'm a lot less inclined to rush to the bathroom for fear of seeing blood. That's a big step for me, particularly since I'm currently into the time last pregnancy where I'd had a loss but hadn't realized it yet. Big hugs, mama. I totally agree that the long weeks' wait of OB appointments are excruciating. The loss of control too, in the event that something does occur between now and until then, is also really hard to deal with.

@Foersty Good luck at your NT scan today!! FX for wonderful news!!

liepertsm · August 2016

Nursegalqc said:

I'm scared every time I go to the bathroom that when I wipe I will see red, wish I could get over that and constantly nudging my breast to make sure it still hurts.

I definitely do both of these also @Nursegalqc

Writing thoughts down and shredding them is a really good idea @pinnerk...I may try that!

I'm so thankful for this community @DaniBanani16. It's so nice to know we're not alone!

sarahbobby · August 2016

Nursegalqc said:

I'm scared every time I go to the bathroom that when I wipe I will see red, wish I could get over that and constantly nudging my breast to make sure it still hurts.

I do this all the time as well..... as in I just did this 10 minutes ago when I went to the restroom. I've also been getting mild cramping with this pregnancy and every morning I lay in bed before getting up to pee and pray, "please don't let there be blood."

MrsBinPA · August 2016

There must be something in the air because I am struggling with PGAL brain badly again the last few days. I just feel like I am waiting for the other shoe to drop despite everything going great so far this time around.

I'm afraid I am getting too attached to the notion that I might actually have a baby in March & I am going to get crushed. I need to call and make my OB appointment and I am afraid to do it for fear it will jinx me.

Hugs to all of you. PGAL is so hard. I'm glad we have each other. Hopefully we have a better week this week!!

liepertsm · August 2016

@dubcompanion Not being in control is the hardest part!

@sarahbobby I had some cramping earlier on too. I talked to my doctor about it, who said it was normal and everything looked fine, but it's so hard not to stress about things like that!

@MrsBinPA I feel the same way. I'm afraid to get too excited sometimes because I'm afraid that something will happen like last time.

Sending up prayers for all of us mamas that we get some peace and healthy pregnancies all around!

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