Any single moms?

sherrera92 · August 2016

Is there anyone else out there? Also I'm currently extra emotional. I just feel like an alien in this experience. Going solo to appointments and talking to jerkface people about it is really taking its toll.

TinaBelcher · August 2016

I'm sorry people are so judgmental! Not a single mom here but we used donor sperm and in my donor support groups on Facebook there are quite a few single moms by choice and I know there are a couple of good single mom support groups on Facebook too. ::hugs:: if you need them!

ceclarlinetlo · August 2016

I'm sorry people are being jerks to you. Do you have a close friend you could take to appointments with you?

Knottie1443924966 · August 2016

Know that you are not alone

are you close with your mom and dad? Have they offered to come to any appointments with you?

sherrera92 · August 2016

@ceclarlinetlo @Knottie1443924966 I live in the town of the college I graduated from so most of my friends moved. My mother lives about 4 hours away. My dad lives a town over from mom but he's upset about this whole situation and has not talked to me since I told him. I plan on moving to mom's right before I'm due.

Knottie1443924966 · August 2016

Is there any prenatal classes you could join? You can make some new friends for the interm.

reenalamba · August 2016

Hi Dear... just believe in yourself. .
u are not alone now.. little one is with you all the time. . Take good care of your diet.. that's like the most imp thing. .
If it's possible for ur mom to shift at your place for sometime

sherrera92 · August 2016

@Knottie1443924966 I'm looking into prenatal yoga, because honestly I miss yoga lol

AshleySparkle720 · August 2016

I'm not a single parent, but dh was deployed from when I was 8weeks pregnant until DD was 7 months old. So I went to all of my appointments alone, had DD by myself, and raised her alone until that point. It's hard, but you can do it! I was shocked at how some people reacted when I was always alone, but you just power through it an know that you're doing the best you can to be a loving and strong mother!

canavara · August 2016

Not a single parent but I do understand the "people being judgmental jerks about things" aspect.

My SO and I are not married and I often feel like I'm a total odd one out--people just assume you have to be married or with a partner to have a child and it can be very frustrating hearing about it. I get angry sometimes knowing that my SO and child are both going to have to get a paternity test after his birth in order for him to have legal rights as a parent just because we are not married. As if marriage is the one deciding factor in whether someone knows who the father of their child is.

sherrera92 · August 2016

@canavara if Maury taught us anything is that even being married does not mean you know who the father is.

Wholesome · August 2016

Every time I scroll past this thread, All the Single Ladies pops in my head, but with Jimmy Fallon doing the hand thing.

raquel87 · August 2016

@canavara is that a state reg for signing a birth certificate? I live in MN and was not married when I had my first 2 sons. They made their dad and I sign a recognition of parentage form that we had notarized in the hospital and then he was placed on the birth certificate. There was the option of a paternity test but he choose to forgo that. Perhaps you might have this option as well?

canavara · August 2016

@raquel87 Yeah it's state law in Indiana. The child legally can't take anyone's last name other than the mother's unless she is married to the father or the father takes a paternity test. It's extremely backwards. We looked into the notarized affidavit for paternity that a lot of other states have but apparently it's just not a thing here. We want to get married--we've been together for several years now--obviously we care about each other enough that we planned to have a child together, but I definitely don't want to rush marriage in some weird "shotgun wedding" style effort.

lindsladle15 · August 2016

I'm sorry @sherrera92. You are on a difficult journey, for sure. I don't have any advice and am not in your shoes, but I'm definitely thinking and praying for you, your sweet baby, and the future

raquel87 · August 2016

@canavara sorry that totally sucks! Hopefully they "get with the times" sooner rather than later lol. I wouldn't rush into a shotgun wedding either, I think when you and the other person know your it for each other. Really what else matters?!

TinaBelcher · August 2016

canavara said:

@raquel87 Yeah it's state law in Indiana. The child legally can't take anyone's last name other than the mother's unless she is married to the father or the father takes a paternity test. It's extremely backwards. We looked into the notarized affidavit for paternity that a lot of other states have but apparently it's just not a thing here. We want to get married--we've been together for several years now--obviously we care about each other enough that we planned to have a child together, but I definitely don't want to rush marriage in some weird "shotgun wedding" style effort.

Thanks Pence! F%#king Indiana.......

sherrera92 · August 2016

@canavara that sucks so much. I'm in Iowa now but my mom lives right on the IL/IN border so it's closer to go to IN than any IL hospital so that's where I plan on having the baby. That'll be fun -_-

kaytastic25 · August 2016

I'm sorry! Thats not ok of people. Im not a single mom but I go to all my appointments alone. Keep your head up, mama!

wispymel · August 2016

I am sorry! Keep being strong!

Wholesome · August 2016

sherrera92 · September 2016

Update guys: after some FBI level Internet stalking via my amazing sorority sisters I've finally found and talked to one night stand guy. Bad news is he's an idiot. Good news is I have closure? I'm gotten a lot more confident with this single mom to be thing. Moving back home never looked so good.

Carly79 · September 2016

@sherrera92 That's great that you were able to have some closure and at least figure who he is. You've got this and will do great.

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