@winchestergirl I enjoy wine and learning about the history of it, and I know that's how a lot of people feel about beer. At the same time, it annoys me when people insist I drink to have more fun. I'm capable of having a great time at a party/social event without a buzz, just like I sometimes enjoy wine alone with my Netflix.
I don't think it's odd when people don't drink. Any reason is valid.
I've been craving beer more than anything else. Last night I sat in my favorite craft beer joint and sulked while my best friend crushed three beautiful beers. It was torture.
In the fall/winter we do "beer Sunday" a couple of times on football days. Beer butt chicken, beer cheese, beer bread, beer battered onion rings. Oh I can't wait for "Beer Sunday".
I feel like some of those things might be ok for you? Like as long as it's a small amount of alcohol and/or it cooks off?
Oh yeah, they should all be fine. Our kids eat all the food we prepare on beer sunday. Its just too warm for beer sunday right now.... Football season is beer sunday season.
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
I like 1 slice of pumpkin pie a year at thanksgiving and then I'm done with it and anything pumpkin flavored.
IDK if this is an UO or not (probably not on here) but I think there should be a ban on any smelly foods at work. The next person who opens a can of tuna fish near me I'm running to their cube to puke instead of the bathroom...
Me: 33 | DH: 34 Married: October, 19, 2015 EDD 2/22/17 DS1 born on 3/2/17 EDD 3/8/20 DS2 born on 3/10/20 EDD 11/24/23 (Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
I like 1 slice of pumpkin pie a year at thanksgiving and then I'm done with it and anything pumpkin flavored.
IDK if this is an UO or not (probably not on here) but I think there should be a ban on any smelly foods at work. The next person who opens a can of tuna fish near me I'm running to their cube to puke instead of the bathroom...
Me: 33 | DH: 34 Married: October, 19, 2015 EDD 2/22/17 DS1 born on 3/2/17 EDD 3/8/20 DS2 born on 3/10/20 EDD 11/24/23 (Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
@HeatSparks I'm with you on the loss of identity. I struggle with feeling like there is something more I'm meant to do or be a part of and it bothers me. I love being a mom and a wife but I miss the things I used to be involved in/with. Hugs.
@Steelerfan78 Kodi is a program you download onto your computer that allows you access to watch almost any movie or tv show. It's how we've watched Homeland, House of Cards, and a ton of documentaries. You can also **sometimes** have access to movies that are currently in theaters.
@HeatSparks I'm with you on the loss of identity. I struggle with feeling like there is something more I'm meant to do or be a part of and it bothers me. I love being a mom and a wife but I miss the things I used to be involved in/with. Hugs.
@Steelerfan78 Kodi is a program you download onto your computer that allows you access to watch almost any movie or tv show. It's how we've watched Homeland, House of Cards, and a ton of documentaries. You can also **sometimes** have access to movies that are currently in theaters.
Thanks @BumpasaurusRex ! I looked into Kodi, but not as great as Popcorn Time. That one is by far the best for torrents. Much nicer GUI too.
I like showers, but would definitely have "something suddenly come up" for anyone who posted that on FB. Gross.
Yeah I don't wanna go but we'll see. I've only met her a handful of times as she and DH's friend haven't been together terribly long, but they have been friends since childhood and the friend came to our shower and brought a very nice and expensive gift so I would feel terrible skipping out. She is nice enough although she seems a little spoiled and bratty but I was blown away by that comment. The shower is over two weeks away does she not realize most people buy the gift the day before/day of the shower?
Kodi is the best. We don't even have a laptop though I think DH just got a box or something a while ago. I really liked Netflix when we had it though and I miss cable too. I miss going to blockbuster with DH and picking out movies the most, we used to go all the time when we first met. Oldies lol
I thought of an UO, but it's really more of an unpopular decision than opinion since it only applies to us, not in general. It's looking like we're not going to do a social media announcement. H is pretty against it, and I'm neutral, so I just don't think it's going to happen. We've been telling people as it becomes relevant and that's good enough for us. We've allowed the moms to spread the news to extended family. I kind of don't mind if my pregnancy flies under the radar and then in February it's just like "Hooray! A baby appeared!" The reason it's not a true UO is that I love seeing others' announcements, just don't really want to do one.
An acquaintance of mine organized her own baby shower through Facebook. She didn't bother making a registry yet she was asking for 40$ per attendance. LOL
Well from the sound of this, perhaps my UO is that I love Netflix. We're about to get rid of our cable, since we end up watching so much on streaming platforms. And if you look at our DVR, all my husband watches is old tv shows that are available on Netflix and/or Amazon Prime.
I can honestly say there isn't a day that goes by that we don't use Netflix. I can't fall asleep in complete quiet and my husband can't fall asleep with the TV on. So I put on headphones and watch an episode of something on Netflix as I fall asleep.
** December BMB Siggy Challenge - Animals in Pools **
Me: 31+ H: 32 TTC Since 11/2015 #1 - MMC 6.5 weeks (2/16); #2 - MC due to cystic hygroma at 20 weeks (10/16); #3 CP (2/17); #4 - Due 12.16.17
@MonaLisaRalphio I'm sorry I didn't ask for your consent, but you are now my official BMB girlfriend. Can't stand Gilmore Girls and expert in all things beer? Hubba hubba. Don't worry... the relationship can be entirely one-sided.
@HeatSparks I totally feel you on this. Before I had kids, I used to travel and have time for great books and thinking and talking... I could put effort into trying to become an interesting and well-rounded person. I think I've lost 10 IQ points per year since getting pregnant with my son, and a lot of my previous identity. Sometimes I bore even myself.
I thought of an UO, but it's really more of an unpopular decision than opinion since it only applies to us, not in general. It's looking like we're not going to do a social media announcement. H is pretty against it, and I'm neutral, so I just don't think it's going to happen. We've been telling people as it becomes relevant and that's good enough for us. We've allowed the moms to spread the news to extended family. I kind of don't mind if my pregnancy flies under the radar and then in February it's just like "Hooray! A baby appeared!" The reason it's not a true UO is that I love seeing others' announcements, just don't really want to do one.
We are also not doing a fb announcement. We've actually only even told my bestie and parents...And aren't telling his parents until 16 weeks. After an earlier loss, all the fb posts I saw made me feel sad about our situation, and I know a few other acquaintances struggling with ttc.
I thought of an UO, but it's really more of an unpopular decision than opinion since it only applies to us, not in general. It's looking like we're not going to do a social media announcement. H is pretty against it, and I'm neutral, so I just don't think it's going to happen. We've been telling people as it becomes relevant and that's good enough for us. We've allowed the moms to spread the news to extended family. I kind of don't mind if my pregnancy flies under the radar and then in February it's just like "Hooray! A baby appeared!" The reason it's not a true UO is that I love seeing others' announcements, just don't really want to do one.
We're not doing one either, we're both kinda neutral on them but we're sure enjoying using word of mouth and others will figure it out in time.
Theres an awful lot of unwanted advice that comes with pregnancy/parenting thats inevitable eventually, buts it's definitely been nice to hold off on random comments from the peanut gallery in the meantime!
ETA: Also the point that @Patience7150 made. I don't think it's wrong to post things that people are excited about, but pregnancy is such a sensitive topic and one never really knows what someone else is dealing with
We aren't doing a social media announcement because it would be extremely unlike us. My husband doesn't use social media, and I use it pretty sparingly. I don't feel like I need the attention from my random high school friends on Facebook.
@tentacular we can be in a TB relationship, but you'll have to share me with @gingersnap because we are deeply committed.
I don't really like attending baby showers and I usually won't attend if invited unless the person is a close friend or relative. Sorry but I'm not spending my money on a gift for your child unless I know you will be sincerely appreciate and you aren't just inviting me to get more shit. My DH and I are attending his close friend and gf's shower mid August and yesterday the chick posted on fb reminding everyone invited to rsvp and mentioned she is checking her registry regularly and hasn't noticed any recent purchases in a "joking" manner. Like really? To be that blatantly gift grabby that just pissed me off and I really don't wanna buy her anything.
Ew, that's so tacky.
An acquaintance of mine organized her own baby shower through Facebook. She didn't bother making a registry yet she was asking for 40$ per attendance. LOL
I had a cousin and an aunt (two separate sides of the family) do the facebook reminder thing regularly. Cousin registered for a ton of clothes and said she would take any clothes not on the registry back. Fast forward to my shower, she gave me an opened pack of newborn diapers and newborn fleece outfit that clearly said on the tags "3 pieces" but was missing the onesie... Our babies were born in June and August (hers, mine respectively).
The aunt would post links to items on her registry everyday as a countdown for her shower... for her 3rd baby. I am not inherently against showers for 2,3,4,5..x baby, but I thought that was tacky. She also threw her own shower for baby #4, waited until after he was born because they were team green and she didn't want any gender neutral stuff. Specifically called it a shower.
My eyes bugged out of my head @concreteangell some people's kids...
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
We aren't doing a social media announcement because it would be extremely unlike us. My husband doesn't use social media, and I use it pretty sparingly. I don't feel like I need the attention from my random high school friends on Facebook.
@tentacular we can be in a TB relationship, but you'll have to share me with @gingersnap because we are deeply committed.
I imagine if I tried to fight for you she'd kick my butt, so I might have to pine and ogle from afar. The good ones are always taken.
We aren't doing a social media announcement because it would be extremely unlike us. My husband doesn't use social media, and I use it pretty sparingly. I don't feel like I need the attention from my random high school friends on Facebook.
@tentacular we can be in a TB relationship, but you'll have to share me with @gingersnap because we are deeply committed.
I imagine if I tried to fight for you she'd kick my butt, so I might have to pine and ogle from afar. The good ones are always taken.
@BumpasaurusRex@tentacular Thanks for commiserating on the identity thing. I have my hopes set that a small part of it is a season — like that I'll have more time and energy to enjoy old hobbies/develop new interests when I'm not consumed by lack of sleep and the tedium of day-to-day with babies and smalls.
I know that moms (and dads too, but I'm not particularly sympathetic to those in my circle) have been fighting this battle forever, and I believe (most days) that I'm a kick ass mom that's killing it, but I miss "dumb", "unimportant" things like live music and creative writing and losing track of time in conversations.
Annnnnnd I'm so excited/positive for babies, but I also feel like I just re-upped my contract.
@heatsparks Ok, that makes sense. I ask because I was reading and thinking, "man, that sucks; I totally don't feel that way." But wait! I'm not being a brat: my son is 7 and I think it was when he was 5, maybe 4, that he started to get way more independent and therefore to started to get way more time for myself. Like to read a book. Pick up a hobby (I started playing in an adult softball league with coworkers!). Go out with friends without feeling bad. Etc., etc. So with an 18mo, you probably started over before you got to that point. And here we all are doing so again! My point is that there IS light at the end of the tunnel. You may even reach it sooner with the twins because they'll have each other to play with plus the older siblings! In the meantime, try to find ways to take care of yourself, too - it's good for you and the family. I don't want to imply that you have to wait another 5 years to feel like you again. Make time for the dumb and unimportant things you enjoy
+1 on the no public Facebook announcement. I haven't told anyone other then my parents yet, I am not planning on telling my siblings until almost 12 weeks. We will tell a select few friends and family at 16 weeks and unless I am showing sooner not make it public knowledge until 20 weeks. We probably won't make a big effort to call up people and tell them and will just wait until we see them to let them find out organically.
The only group I am making a sort of big deal our of telling is our siblings. I didn't even make a big deal when telling my parents, they were like "So what else is new?" And I was like, "Oh I'm pregnant."
@MommaBean Thank you so much. That's exactly what my hopes are, and it's so nice to hear them validated. My 5 year old is so easy, but his brother has been difficult since the start. It's a much healthier perspective to recognize that there wasn't a break, and that the new babies will close out my family and I can find that old "unimportant" self again.
@gingersnap Best. Article. I've read similar, but that one's a keeper. And has me realllll ready for 40
I don't plan on financially supporting my kids once they are adults. This includes college.
Agree. I mean, if we can help out where needed I'm totally open to it.
Yeah I would help if they were in a tight spot. But I plan on teaching them to be independent and self sufficient adults.
I definitely get this mindset. I think there are far too many kids out there who don't truly get or value money, and then when they enter into the "real world" they're struck dumb because they have no clue. As someone who paid their way through college, it was very difficult, but I did learn a lot more than a good deal of my peers who had their expenses paid. I was filing my own taxes at 19, while my friends were asking what a W2 was.
H & I are hoping to be able to pay for their lodging/meal plan & they can get a student loan for their tuition/books. We figure they can pay for their spending money & fun money. Don't like the meal plan at school? Guess you better get a job to buy you your taco bell. Ran out of gas? Guess you better bike it to work. I definitely want them to learn how to budget for what they need vs. what they want. Now if my kid screws around at school and doesn't take it seriously, they can bring their butt home and get a job. I'm not funding a Van Wilder.
I don't plan on financially supporting my kids once they are adults. This includes college.
Agree. I mean, if we can help out where needed I'm totally open to it.
Yeah I would help if they were in a tight spot. But I plan on teaching them to be independent and self sufficient adults.
I definitely get this mindset. I think there are far too many kids out there who don't truly get or value money, and then when they enter into the "real world" they're struck dumb because they have no clue. As someone who paid their way through college, it was very difficult, but I did learn a lot more than a good deal of my peers who had their expenses paid. I was filing my own taxes at 19, while my friends were asking what a W2 was.
H & I are hoping to be able to pay for their lodging/meal plan & they can get a student loan for their tuition/books. We figure they can pay for their spending money & fun money. Don't like the meal plan at school? Guess you better get a job to buy you your taco bell. Ran out of gas? Guess you better bike it to work. I definitely want them to learn how to budget for what they need vs. what they want. Now if my kid screws around at school and doesn't take it seriously, they can bring their butt home and get a job. I'm not funding a Van Wilder.
Yep I was one of those kids that wasn't taught anything about money. Made some pretty ridiculous mistakes and had to learn the hard way. I really don't want my kids to have to go through that. I want them to know the value of a dollar, and respect that you have to earn what you need/ want.
I feel you guys on the kids learning the value of a dollar, I really do. But I truly believe that my parents did me a disservice by refusing to help with my college tuition. I worked 30+ hours per week from the time I was 16 for my own spending money, and I didn't have any problem with that. But my parents lived EXTREMELY comfortably, and while I was building up tens of thousands of dollars in student loans, they were buying new cars and expensive country club memberships and taking lavish vacations. I don't begrudge them the right to spend their own money, but is it really ethical to allow your child to struggle for more than a decade after college to pay off her student loans when you're so freaking loaded that you can't throw your money away quickly enough?
I developed good sensibilities about money on my own, and I really don't think they have anything to do with my parents' refusal to help fund my education. They did the same thing with my sister, who has defaulted on college loans and, at 31, still can't really seem to get her life together.
I'm not saying that people ought to suffer in order to pay for their kids' education. But I also think that none of us has any idea what we're going to be able to afford or want to pay for in 18 years, and so I think it's kind of silly to make blanket statements about what you can or will do in two decades' time. I held a lot of resentment against my parents in my twenties when I was truly struggling to pay my bills, and they refused to help, citing some kind of ridiculous "principle." At almost 33, I'm much more comfortable, but I still haven't fully paid off all my loans. And I have to grit my teeth every time my mom suggests I do or buy something that's "only" a couple thousand dollars.
Re: UO (7/28)
I don't think it's odd when people don't drink. Any reason is valid.
BFP #1 8/4/2015, MMC 9/24/2015
BFP #3 8/24/2017, MC 9/20/2017
BFP #4 11/14/2017, CP
BFP #5 1/5/2018, MC/BO 2/17/2018
BFP #6 7/15/2018, CP
BFP #7 12/15/2018, EDD 8/28/2019
IDK if this is an UO or not (probably not on here) but I think there should be a ban on any smelly foods at work. The next person who opens a can of tuna fish near me I'm running to their cube to puke instead of the bathroom...
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
IDK if this is an UO or not (probably not on here) but I think there should be a ban on any smelly foods at work. The next person who opens a can of tuna fish near me I'm running to their cube to puke instead of the bathroom...
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
@Steelerfan78 Kodi is a program you download onto your computer that allows you access to watch almost any movie or tv show. It's how we've watched Homeland, House of Cards, and a ton of documentaries. You can also **sometimes** have access to movies that are currently in theaters.
Big Bro 7/14/13
Little Bro 2/6/17
@bumpasaurusRex I have no idea if Kodi is legal or not, but when I saw your response, I immediately heard Leo:
ME: 25, DH: 27
TTC #1 since 09/2015
Miscarriage @ 10 wks 02/28/2016
BFP 05/28/2016!
BFP #1 8/4/2015, MMC 9/24/2015
BFP #3 8/24/2017, MC 9/20/2017
BFP #4 11/14/2017, CP
BFP #5 1/5/2018, MC/BO 2/17/2018
BFP #6 7/15/2018, CP
BFP #7 12/15/2018, EDD 8/28/2019
When you've been married this long, you need a ticker to remind you.
Baby Boy M - 08/01/2013
Expecting Baby Bean February 2017
@cinderin Do you just hate it due to the spelling, or do you dislike Jackson as well?
I hate it when people take normal names and spell them all stupid to make them "unique".
ME: 25, DH: 27
TTC #1 since 09/2015
Miscarriage @ 10 wks 02/28/2016
BFP 05/28/2016!
When you've been married this long, you need a ticker to remind you.
Baby Boy M - 08/01/2013
Expecting Baby Bean February 2017
I can honestly say there isn't a day that goes by that we don't use Netflix. I can't fall asleep in complete quiet and my husband can't fall asleep with the TV on. So I put on headphones and watch an episode of something on Netflix as I fall asleep.
** December BMB Siggy Challenge - Animals in Pools **
Me: 31+ H: 32
TTC Since 11/2015
#1 - MMC 6.5 weeks (2/16); #2 - MC due to cystic hygroma at 20 weeks (10/16); #3 CP (2/17); #4 - Due 12.16.17
@HeatSparks I totally feel you on this. Before I had kids, I used to travel and have time for great books and thinking and talking... I could put effort into trying to become an interesting and well-rounded person. I think I've lost 10 IQ points per year since getting pregnant with my son, and a lot of my previous identity. Sometimes I bore even myself.
Theres an awful lot of unwanted advice that comes with pregnancy/parenting thats inevitable eventually, buts it's definitely been nice to hold off on random comments from the peanut gallery in the meantime!
ETA: Also the point that @Patience7150 made. I don't think it's wrong to post things that people are excited about, but pregnancy is such a sensitive topic and one never really knows what someone else is dealing with
Big Bro 7/14/13
Little Bro 2/6/17
@tentacular we can be in a TB relationship, but you'll have to share me with @gingersnap because we are deeply committed.
The aunt would post links to items on her registry everyday as a countdown for her shower... for her 3rd baby. I am not inherently against showers for 2,3,4,5..x baby, but I thought that was tacky. She also threw her own shower for baby #4, waited until after he was born because they were team green and she didn't want any gender neutral stuff. Specifically called it a shower.
My eyes bugged out of my head @concreteangell some people's kids...
Thanks for commiserating on the identity thing. I have my hopes set that a small part of it is a season — like that I'll have more time and energy to enjoy old hobbies/develop new interests when I'm not consumed by lack of sleep and the tedium of day-to-day with babies and smalls.
I know that moms (and dads too, but I'm not particularly sympathetic to those in my circle) have been fighting this battle forever, and I believe (most days) that I'm a kick ass mom that's killing it, but I miss "dumb", "unimportant" things like live music and creative writing and losing track of time in conversations.
Annnnnnd I'm so excited/positive for babies, but I also feel like I just re-upped my contract.
THIS.
ME: 25, DH: 27
TTC #1 since 09/2015
Miscarriage @ 10 wks 02/28/2016
BFP 05/28/2016!
I loved this article. I think it sums up how us Moms are feeling at this time in our lives, I thought you may like it @HeatSparks
I mean, if we can help out where needed I'm totally open to it.
The only group I am making a sort of big deal our of telling is our siblings. I didn't even make a big deal when telling my parents, they were like "So what else is new?" And I was like, "Oh I'm pregnant."
TTC since January 2016
BFP - 3/12/16 - MC 4/5/16
BFP - 6/11/16
@gingersnap Best. Article. I've read similar, but that one's a keeper. And has me realllll ready for 40
H & I are hoping to be able to pay for their lodging/meal plan & they can get a student loan for their tuition/books. We figure they can pay for their spending money & fun money. Don't like the meal plan at school? Guess you better get a job to buy you your taco bell. Ran out of gas? Guess you better bike it to work. I definitely want them to learn how to budget for what they need vs. what they want. Now if my kid screws around at school and doesn't take it seriously, they can bring their butt home and get a job. I'm not funding a Van Wilder.
I developed good sensibilities about money on my own, and I really don't think they have anything to do with my parents' refusal to help fund my education. They did the same thing with my sister, who has defaulted on college loans and, at 31, still can't really seem to get her life together.
I'm not saying that people ought to suffer in order to pay for their kids' education. But I also think that none of us has any idea what we're going to be able to afford or want to pay for in 18 years, and so I think it's kind of silly to make blanket statements about what you can or will do in two decades' time. I held a lot of resentment against my parents in my twenties when I was truly struggling to pay my bills, and they refused to help, citing some kind of ridiculous "principle." At almost 33, I'm much more comfortable, but I still haven't fully paid off all my loans. And I have to grit my teeth every time my mom suggests I do or buy something that's "only" a couple thousand dollars.