2 year olds

cm716 · July 2016

It seems like quite a few of us have 2 year olds. Anyone else nervous their two year old is going to freak out when the baby is born?
My daughter turned 2 last month and i can tell she doesn't really get it. How are you prepping your two year old for baby? Any plans on how to deal with the inevitable fallout?

Note this is baby number 3 for me so you'd think I'd have all this great insight. dd1 however, was very different and closer to 2.5 when dd2 was born.

AmandaG225 · July 2016

I would also like to hear what everyone has to say about this. DD turned 2 in June & I'm afraid she is not going to do well when DS arrives. We are doing everything I know to do in order to prepare her...we got her a doll, books & are constantly talking her brother and how DD is going to help mommy take care of brother. But I'm sure she still doesn't really get it. I'm afraid she is going to have a really hard time not being the center of attention but hopefully I'm wrong or at least hopefully she gets over it quickly!

Bookhousegirl · July 2016

DS turned 2 at the end of March. I just got him a doll, and he's been "taking care" of it for the last couple of days. I'm hoping it helps him to understand the idea of being a helper/big brother. I am petrified of what's to come when the baby's born, especially with things like bottles and breastfeeding. I don't know that there's much more I can be doing, but I'm willing to try anything!

Ceventa · July 2016

DS turned two in March and so far he seems to be doing ok with the idea, at least as much as I could expect from a 2 year old. He touches my belly and says, "baby sister!", we're making him involved in putting her room together and we encourage him to talk to her in the belly. He seems very interested in other babies, which I think is good. However whenever we give him a doll he swings it around, so there's that lol

texasmama2014 · July 2016

DD turned 2 a few weeks ago. She doesn't get it, but she has started to not acknowledge the "baby in mommy's tummy", and if asked about it, she says no. I'm super concerned about how she's going to handle the new baby. I'm concerned about having enough time with her, about her trying to hurt the baby or hurting him/her by playing too hard. Plus DH won't really be taking much time off. So there's that. My mom will be around, but I really don't want her to be away from me, and also I want her to be around the baby so she gets used to him/her...
To make matters worse she's definitely started testing her limits with tantrums and saying "no" to our requests. Being a mom is hard!

ThisisNumber3 · July 2016

@cm716 - Thank you for this post! This is number 3 for us too, but my daughter was 3 years old when her little brother was born. These will only be 2 years apart.

He doesn't get at all about a baby coming. We did mess around with him the other day, and I held a tiny baby thinking he would get jealous but he didn't.

I think our issue will be that he is used to being the baby and getting what he wants when he wants it. Or else he screams and cries. We try not to spoil him or anything but at 2, they aren't easily distracted.

ThisisNumber3 · July 2016

One great thing that we did for my daughter was tell her to kiss the baby's toes. It was better than her getting near the baby's face or head (soft spot) and we didn't really want her touching baby's hands. The only problem was she always wanted to take off the baby's socks so she could play/kiss his toes.

bearsandbeets7 · July 2016

I'm worried about this as well. DD will only be 22 months when LO will be born so she doesn't understand it and she's not old enough for us to explain it to her. I'm thinking that as long as I include her in helping take care of little one and make sure to spend time with just her when he sleeps that hopefully the transition will be as smooth as bringing s new baby home can be.

pelorunningmama · July 2016

DD will turn 3 at the end of October, so by the time baby gets here, she will be almost there. I'm hoping that since she is a bit older, she will be more in to helping and maybe not as jealous. Of course I've also heard a ton about "threenagers," so that makes me nervous.

amandazap · July 2016

DS will be 18 mo when LO is born and I have been saying things like, "Where's Anthony?" And he will point at my belly. I've also been showing him newborn pictures/videos and saying, "Awww, see the baby?" IDK if he gets it but I'm worried about behavior and sleep regression.

Pepper6 · July 2016

We've been taking the baby up a lot, showing her baby pictures, encouraging her 'help' and saying how she's going to be such a good big sister, etc, but I think it's still going to just come down to an adjustment for everyone.

I'm more nervous about how she'll adjust to no longer going to daycare since I'll be a sahm after this. She loves going and will probably miss it.

ginger819 · July 2016

Some of this makes me glad DD will only be 15 months and not quite in the terrible 2s. She has a stuffed baby she likes to bring to us to hold and cuddle and she loves giving it hugs. We originally got it for her when I started babysitting a now 7 month old (she was 10 weeks when I started). I think it's helped to have another real baby around as she had to learn "be gentle" and "be nice" pretty early and I don't think she'll be as jealous about sharing me, because she already does most days (we'll have to see how sharing the spotlight with DH goes though). I'm most nervous about her nighttime sleep. Even though they won't be in the same room, she's a very light sleeper and I hope he doesn't wake her up at night.

mooncusp22 · July 2016

My DD will be 28 months when the baby is born. She has a baby doll that she carrys around with her- she likes to put it in the real crib, or try to buckle it in the carseat (which is sitting in the nursery), change it and feed it (by jabbing bottles into its mouth). We talk about the real baby alot and she will sometimes kiss my belly. But, I don't think she has a clue an actual baby is coming. She is the helper type so I think she will try to help but probably be a little rough with the real baby because she doesn't understand. I can see her trying to shove crackers into his mouth. She gets upset when I don't let her help so I am sure there will be some tears.
My parents will be flying up for 2 weeks and then we are all flying back to their house (minus DH since he has to work) to continue recovery and have help (they live on the beach in FL so a nice recovery!). So, DD1 will have lots of attention with them especially. I still want to make sure I make just mommy/toddler time with her each day. I read to her before bed every night and hope to do that and switch the newborn off with my parents during that time.

KJ1416 · July 2016

@texasmama2014. I'm getting the same reaction from my 27 month old. Every time we try to talk about baby sister he said "no". If we look at her stuff and talk about it he says "no, nay nay's". (That is what he calls himself, his name is Nathan). I'm really scared how he's going to react when she comes home. We've planned a present for him when he comes to the hospital, but that is it. I also started making sure I didn't call him baby anymore. Instead I say big boy or my helper. My mom said it might be a little hard for a couple of days, but she thinks it will pass quickly. I sure hope so!

Curls919 · July 2016

@KJ1416 my son is almost 3 so he understands more but he keeps saying "when I'm a baby I can do...." like he's automatically going to go back to being a baby. We keep talking about how boring it is to be a baby and how awesome it is to be a big boy.

pelorunningmama · July 2016

@curls919 we got a book for DD "i'm a big sister now" that makes it sound super boring to be a baby. DD loves to recite lines from it that talk about how she can have ice cream and apples and gets to play, etc. I think that has helped her a lot. It also talks about how babies like to sleep and cry a lot, so I'm hoping that she hears that part as well. The fact that she won't be able to play with him for a while could come as a shock to her.

SkiChic626 · July 2016

My DD turned 2 a month ago, also, but I think they get it more than we give them credit for. We're on vacation this week and there are two twin beds in her room and she told us without any prompting that the other bed is for baby boy. We were seriously shocked! She's also constantly kissing my belly, feeding my belly, tells him good morning, and telling us that "baby boy is coming too" when we go places. So idk.... I'm most worried about the jealousy once he's actually here and requires a lot of my attention, I think that's going to be the most challenging thing. We got her a book about being a big sister and it's one of her favorites to read before bed now!

SkiChic626 · July 2016

We got the same book as @LWC1112, DD loves it!

karlimonster · July 2016

My son will be 18 months and besides him not understanding I'm mostly worried about physical limitations. If I end up with a repeat c-section I won't be able to pick him up or if I'm breastfeeding I won't have both hands available. He will still attend daycare and family will stop by, but I wish he could understand a bit more or had other babies around him for exposure. It should be fun!

amandazap · July 2016

karlimonster said:

My son will be 18 months and besides him not understanding I'm mostly worried about physical limitations. If I end up with a repeat c-section I won't be able to pick him up or if I'm breastfeeding I won't have both hands available. He will still attend daycare and family will stop by, but I wish he could understand a bit more or had other babies around him for exposure. It should be fun!

I'm in the same boat! DS is 18 mo as well and we are keeping him in daycare one day per week. Thankfully, DH is taking his whole vacation in the month of August so he can do the driving and errands. I am very lucky and grateful for that. I have the same fear of physical limitations because I'm such a control freak! I'm sure it will all work out.

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