June 2016 Moms

Leaving the House

Two and a half weeks in, I have had a few minor victories on the adventuring front: I've successfully gone to the pediatrician, a baby cafe, grandmas, TJ Max, etc. Yet I still feel really restricted and housebound. I'm breastfeeding, and while not normally a shy person, I'm terrified that I'll be out and about and the babe will freak out and have a difficult latching session out in public or a major poop splosion with no public bathroom in sight. I really want to DO things again. Nothing epic. Simple things like walk around the block (2.5 miles of epicness in this heat), but anxiety keeps putting me back in my house. How does everyone else handle the finikiness (sp?) of a newborn? How are you all doing about breaking out of the house? Anyone else with similar anxieties?




Re: Leaving the House

  • I definitely understand where you are coming from and this is baby #3 for me. My son is 6 weeks old today and I haven't even driven since before he was born. Whenever I have left the house my DH is driving so I can keep an eye on DS with the baby mirror. I have gone to doctors appointments and family's houses but that's it. I am anxious to get out on my own, at least just DS and I without the older 2. Another worry of mine is exposing DS to outside germs so I have been having DH do all the grocery runs but I know he is getting tired of that. Maybe after his first round of immunizations I'll feel less anxious about that.



    DS-7
    DD-4

    Pregnancy Ticker
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  • I go stir crazy being inside all day so we go out practically everyday: run errands, grocery shop, walk around the mall, go out to eat etc. However, I don't breastfeed. I just make sure his diaper bag is full: several bottles, diapers, several changes of clothes and so on. I've ventured out twice with just myself and the baby (normally my mom or husband goes along) and that was nerve wracking especially when he fussed in the car.  His stroller has a bassinet attachment so it makes it super easy to change his diaper and have him laying down for a nap.  I have the bjorn that I take as well so wen were eating sometimes he would rather be in that then the bassinet stroller. 
  • I am right there with you! My DD will be 6 weeks on Monday. She has reflux and has very bad fussy spells. I'm so worried about her losing it while out and about. We have had several successful outings though. We went out to eat with family for lunch and she got hungry, so i had to nurse her at the restaurant and it didn't go well. We were seated outside and she got hot and angry. A table opened up for us inside, so I had to finish feeding her inside, but she hated the nursing scarf. I know I have to overcome being worried about nursing in public. I can't live my life being held to my house every 2-3 hours. 
  • Man, DS and I go everywhere. I try to do at least one outing a day. Otherwise I think I would go insane. I live super close to Target and shops so we walk most of the time. We've also made the 3 hour drive to my parents' house three times. This weekend we've gone to the tour of homes. He's done really really well. 
  • Definitely make sure the diaper bag is stocked! Having a bottle on hand, an extra pair of clothes and a nursing cover are a must. I've also found having a wet bag (for dirty clothes), hand sanitizer wipes, and a pacifier really help. I feed LO and then leave immediately to get the most time out. 

    Walking to Starbycks is great because I can sit outside and nurse which I find less nerve wracking then sitting inside in a small space while nursing. 

    Buy buybaby has has a nursing room (I'm sure other places do to) and you may wind up spending too much but it's a good "practice run"
    Me (31) & DH (32)
    Married 9/27/2014
    DD Born 6/23/16
    Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
  • I'm not breastfeeding but I think it gets easier as you go, I'm on number 3 and it's all about the diaper bag. You also want to make sure you have an outfit for yourself in the bag or at least a shirt. If your at the mall Nordstrom also has a nursing room with a changing table. They also have really nice bathrooms! Start small with going out, short trips but just work up to going out more. I've only had 1 blowout while running errands and it wasn't so bad. Do you have a carrier or wrap because that helps a ton! Babies also usually love being worn and mine will usually sleep the whole time. You can do this!  
  • I breastfeed and then get out the door. Timing is difficult but definitely do able. And even though I don't love nursing in public, ive done it. Or nursed in the car. Or nursed in front of family. Practice discrete latching at home and when you become more confident at getting baby to latch feeding in public isn't nearly so bad.
  • I'm right there with you (ftm by the way). I'm also so tired of people telling me that I need to get out. I want to venture out but I don't feel ready yet. I don't like feeling pressured. Anywho, I definitely have anxieties about taking him on public transit (I live in Montreal so I don't drive often). I'm nervous about breastfeeding outside the house too, not so much about the people around but because we're still working on it (he and I are getting the hang of it tho, slowly). I feel more confident going out with him when my husband is with us. He's been my "security blanket" since we brought the little guy home. We've been for walks several times and quick trips to a couple of stores, I took him on an errand down the street by myself today but we weren't far from home.
  • I'm with you! Breastfeeding is my main source of anxiety when leaving home bc she hurts me and i can't manage a cover or scarf yet. So I try to feed right before we go, and bring a bottle of expressed milk to feed her while out. I'm actually at a friend's bbq right now, pumping upstairs while DH feeds her. Can't do this in public places though : (
  • It took me a week to go for a walk in the park and DH always came with me.  I didn't go somewhere alone till 4-5 weeks in.  As for feeding I always fed before I left the house and I'm not shy but I also worry about being in the wrong place when he's hungry like an aisle in the store and there's no place to sit.
  • I think at 2.5 weeks I had the exact same anxieties and had a hard time feeling comfortable with going out on my own with baby.  It took a couple mishaps with my husband present for me to be like "Ok, if she screams, it will be ok because I can feed her in the dressing room or go out to the car and come back", etc.  It gets more normalized the more you do it.  We're at 4.5 weeks and we try to go out once a day, too, even just to Target...well, mostly just to Target ;).  I also try to time things where I feed her right before we leave, which helps.  
  • It sounds like you're doing better than you give yourself credit for if you're getting out for walks, to the store, etc after 2 weeks :) I can relate to the feeling though. My LO is 5 weeks today and we've had to build up to longer/more complicated excursions. For me, it's just been a matter of making new a plan for where I can nurse or change before we go somewhere. I fed the baby in the backseat of our car a couple of times (while parked, of course) because it was the most comfortable place for us. Maybe look for places with lots of kids and families. Whenever there are a lot of little kids around I feel like no one is going to notice anything I or my kid are doing. 

  • You just have to go for it! Worst case scenario go to the car to nurse if you want privacy. I remember the first time I took my twins somewhere by myself besides my parents house they were probably 5 months old, I waited so long because they were 3 lb 33weekers, but it was so rewarding, and so much easier before they get mobile! Just go for it! Worst case scenario something will happen and you will deal with it and figure it out as you go.
  • I'm super jealous of all you ladies leaving the house every day. With a 4 year old and 6 week old, I have to plan outings a week in advance lol. I may be able to shower every day but hair and makeup is another story. I actually feel like I should have it way more together now but I just don't. Plus every day i feel like my list of tasks is a mile long! Ugh. 
  • mdargie said:
    I'm super jealous of all you ladies leaving the house every day. With a 4 year old and 6 week old, I have to plan outings a week in advance lol. I may be able to shower every day but hair and makeup is another story. I actually feel like I should have it way more together now but I just don't. Plus every day i feel like my list of tasks is a mile long! Ugh. 
    Don't worry! With 3 kids (Two 2 1/2 yr olds and a 5 week old) I have only taken them all out together by myself twice, and both times my twins made me rue the day.
  • Baby boy is two weeks old.  So far we have been to multiple doctor appts, church, and on a 3 hour away overnight trip.  I had someone with me every time mostly bc I had a c section and they didn't want me carrying too much.  I am EP at the moment until we get his tongue tie clipped so feeding in public isnt a huge deal.  
  • Tawny87 said:
    mdargie said:
    I'm super jealous of all you ladies leaving the house every day. With a 4 year old and 6 week old, I have to plan outings a week in advance lol. I may be able to shower every day but hair and makeup is another story. I actually feel like I should have it way more together now but I just don't. Plus every day i feel like my list of tasks is a mile long! Ugh. 
    Don't worry! With 3 kids (Two 2 1/2 yr olds and a 5 week old) I have only taken them all out together by myself twice, and both times my twins made me rue the day.
    LOL yes. I swear the 4 year old is harder to deal with than the newborn! She's definitely had a hard time adjusting to a sibling as well as being home all day since school is out. I took her for a pedicure yesterday while DH was home to keep the baby, and she literally whined the while time that she was bored  :| Why do I try lol
  • I hate being in the house. I feed him before we leave and take a pumped bottle with me. That buys me roughly 6 hours. If I need to BF I do it in the car because I'm not comfortable in public yet. Diaper changes happen in bathrooms or in the car when I BF. We took a weekend trip to visit my brother and one to visit my ILs where we were rarely in a house and it worked out great! I think you just have to bite the bullet or you'll never do it. That's how I was anyway. 
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