New Job

jstringfellow19 · July 2016

I applied for a job in February and never heard anything about an interview until the middle of May. I then had a 2nd interview at the end of June. I found out I was pregnant a week before the 2nd interview and today got the call that I was being offered the job. I am going to take the position because it is something I have wanted for a long time. Well at this point it is very clear that "technically" I will not be covered by FMLA and the company doesn't do maternity leave so I would be using my own PTO. I understand all of the rules and what not, but I'm just looking for some advice on telling my new boss and what kind of outcome any of you might of had In a similar situation.

BumpasaurusRex · July 2016

Honestly, I'd wait until all paperwork has been signed stating that you've accepted the job and will be starting X date. And even after that, I wouldn't feel inclined to tell them until you're out of the 1st tri.

In my heart, I have always known that morally, it's best to be upfront and honest with a new employer. But at the end of the day, it's business and they have their goals. If you don't match up with them and give them a reason to second guess you (even though it's illegal to discriminate), they can back out of the offer citing other "reasons."

peachesnbean · July 2016

I've had friends actually negotiate mat leave into their offer. It's a really bold move, but the ones that have done it it has worked out well for them.

jstringfellow19 · July 2016

@BumpasaurusRex I definitely don't plan to tell them until I have actually started the job. I'm 8 weeks on Saturday so I'll be creeping up on the end of 1st tri when I get started. My goal is to just prove myself and not give them any reason to want to get rid of me or hold my position.

jstringfellow19 · July 2016

peachesnbean said:

I've had friends actually negotiate mat leave into their offer. It's a really bold move, but the ones that have done it it has worked out well for them.

Wow. That is a bold move. Negotiations scare me. I am always afraid that it will end negatively.

catiecatp · July 2016

@jstringfellow19 I'm in a similar position - I got my BFP within days of getting a job offer that I accepted. I start Aug 15th when I'll be about 14 weeks. I won't qualify for FMLA but I know I'll be hard to replace and no one local was good enough (I'm moving 2000 miles for the job - I was the only one to get a second interview - they flew me down to meet me...). I intend to rock teaching the first semester and then I'm banking on them giving me 3 months off without pay. DH will take over caring for the baby until August 2017 at which point we'll need childcare. Not ideal but since he will be in the US legally but unable to work it makes the most sense. The kick in the arse is that if I were staying in Canada I'd have 12 months of reduced pay guaranteed leave, protected as much as a contract worker in a union can have. But long term this new job is better for us.

jstringfellow19 · July 2016

@catiecatp Glad I'm not alone! This will be a much better opportunity for our family so I hope it all works out.

elstar-2 · July 2016

It's good to hear all of your experiences. I have been looking for a new job since before BFP (with the prospect of possibly moving cross-country for the right opportunity for my husband and I). I'm currently 8 weeks and am really hoping to find something while I'm still in the first trimester. Too much after that point I unfortunately feel like I'm going to be stuck in my current job.

cantalopes24 · July 2016

I've started two jobs while pregnant. I was 5 months pregnant and not showing. I ended up telling them about 2 months later because I started having complications and needed accommodations for appointments. They were awesome, I took 3 unpaid months off and then worked from home and was paid hourly for two months and then went back part time even though they hired me for full time.

The second job I told them at 14 weeks, about 3 weeks after I started. I took 6 weeks because we needed the money and was already part time when I started that job so I went back to the same schedule.

Gingersnap · July 2016

I don't have any advice, but congrats!
Also, I read you name as G-string fellow every time

jstringfellow19 · July 2016

Gingersnap said:

I don't have any advice, but congrats!
Also, I read you name as G-string fellow every time

I'm dead!

Thats hilarious.

jstringfellow19 · July 2016

@cantalopes24 I really wanted to take off 12 weeks, but I don't know if we can go without the money for that long. I am going to throw the idea out there to my boss after I start about teleworking so maybe that will ease things up. I am glad things worked out so well for you. I'm just a worry wart and I'm having a hard time being optimistic about what will happen come February.

jstringfellow19 · July 2016

ElStar said:

It's good to hear all of your experiences. I have been looking for a new job since before BFP (with the prospect of possibly moving cross-country for the right opportunity for my husband and I). I'm currently 8 weeks and am really hoping to find something while I'm still in the first trimester. Too much after that point I unfortunately feel like I'm going to be stuck in my current job.

I hope you can find something. I figured that if I didn't get this position I was not going to look or apply until after the baby.

catiecatp · July 2016

If I was there for longer I'd have the time to complete some online teaching training and could do that instead - I'll be sure to have that completed before we start trying for our next child for sure. Teleworking would be a good option. Does DH have the option to take some time off with his job?

cantalopes24 · July 2016

@jstringfellow19 I was very lucky. I couldn't have gone back to work any sooner though because my dad was undergoing cancer treatments and I was helping with driving him to appointments and he was supposed to be my daycare. He's pretty much a rockstar though and was fine and started watching my son before he was even done treatments.

jstringfellow19 · July 2016

That awesome @cantalopes24

Yes, my DH can take some time if he needs too. @catiecatp

soontobemomof2-2 · July 2016

Stupid question : what's FMLA??! I'm Canadian and not familiar with the acronym..

cinderin · July 2016

FMLA is the family medical leave act. it's federal law.

some states have protected maternity/parental/disability leave that you would be eligible for. I am in WA and we do, so a person who doesn't qualify for fmal can for wa state leave.

it is unpaid but it is job protection.

I am with the others, I think your plan of waiting as long as possible to tell is the right one.

Shawlls · July 2016

I work in HR (and manage staff) and this will be my second mat leave. I just want to say that any good employer will accommodate you and hopefully offer you some unpaid time (even if it's not officially a mat leave). So many women (and men) take time off to only return and do a fantastic job. I would much prefer a good employee who has to go away for a bit and come back vs. someone who isn't a good employee and is there 100% of the time.

In terms of telling them, I always wait until 12-14 weeks, for my sanity, but also because I show early (I'm petite) so have to tell a bit earlier. (I also live in Canada, so the maternity leave is long and it's therefore good to give lots of notice considering how long I'll be away).

jstringfellow19 · July 2016

I see it the same way @Shawlls I figure if I prove myself over the next 8 months that everything will work out. DH works for this company as well and he is going to do some research tomorrow and see if he can find anything in the handbook.

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