I told my husband I probably shouldn't be driving because I'm so distracted and don't want to get into an accident and he totally agreed. But really I just don't want to go grocery shopping. I just want to sit around my house and have a pity party for one waiting for this baby. And going out sucks right now anyways, no one can see me without commenting on how miserable or tired I look. I'll just stay home thank you.
I had my daughter at 19 in college. She's at her dads half the time. Which means I'm free to listen to my foul mouthed rap music a lot. As excited as I am for this baby, s/he will never leave for the weekend to go to their dads. When am I supposed to get my thug on? This has me a little bummed.
@LDSJM123 lol!!! I was wondering when will I have to stop listening to uncensored rap once this baby arrives? Right away or can I have a few months before he starts picking up curse words?
One of my planned post baby outings will be to see Kanye.
I have absolutely no problem cutting people out of my life if they're toxic drama llamas. Doesn't matter if you're my mother, best friend of 15 years or the pizza delivery guy. If you're a crappy person who makes my life harder you don't get to be part of my life.
Today is my last day of work. I worked half the morning in the office and am supposed to work the second half from home. Not going to even bother turning on my computer. Fuck. That. Noise.
I have no drive or desire to do anything. I just want to lay on my couch and be a bum. But there's so much to do, or so it seems. So glad today is my day off because I really really do not look forward to the daily grind even though I absolutely love my job.
FFFC: I'm terrified of actually having to birth this baby. I'm so ready to hold her and I know I can totally do this but it's getting kinda scary now that my due date is a week away. I'm only 1.5 cm dilated and still pretty thick so the idea of being induced scares me even more. Whose idea was this anyway??! Lol
One of my top reasons for skipping the epidural this time is to save money... Even though I have good insurance, my son ended up "costing" about $2500. About $1000 of that was the epidural. Yes, I have other reasons, but I confess, that's like the cost of a fancy weekend getaway!
I haven't washed my hair since Monday. I told my husband this yesterday and he looked at me like I had lost my damn mind. Oh well, let's see how many more days I can get out of it !
LDSJM123 I pretty much just listen to my uncensored rap music around all my kids (including stepkids; ages 2, 9, and 11). 2 year old DS1 is starting to catch on to curse words now but...we make it very clear with the older kids that those types of words can only be used in certain contexts and are never to be used around adults/authority under any circumstances. They seem to comply very well with that. I'm sorry but I can't give up my rap music.
@hannahmp wow, you are a tough mama. Idk if the epidural costs us more, and I don't care given how much I love the relief. It's a good thing my hubby doesnt know skipping it could be cost saving, however. He's a penny pincher and might consider it. LOL
As a woman who has always had some level of self-consciousness about her body and is now a round woman with more cellulite than I ever recall having, all of these "Get your bikini body" adds by friends/retailers/media etc. are really bothering me this year. Why can't the womanly figure be embraced and loved? Why does it have to have flat abs and no bra budge to be considered a "bikini body"? Being pregnant, while definitely beautiful in nature but not glamorous, has taught me to love my body because it's capable of doing some pretty insane things...like grow a human child. I won't lie though, I often sit in front of the mirror and just sulk and wonder how my husband can still find me attractive because I can't even see my own vagina anymore. Despite that I still think I have a pretty rockin' bikini body and a leggings body and just a normal every day whatever I feel like wearing body.
FFFC: I asked for my epidural the minute I was admitted into the hospital. I think I was only 2 centimeters? I don't regret it one bit. I ended up with a second degree tear and I'm so glad I didn't feel the tear or the stitches.
I don't believe in the whole respect you elders/family stuff. I'm polite to everyone, regardless of how they act but very few people actually have my respect. It should be something that's earned and it should work boh ways. Automatically expecting it just because you are older than me or one of my family members is bullshat!
My total bill for after I have the baby will be €0. I don't have insurance or anything, it's completely free here for a woman during pregnancy. I've said it before but the US is crazy when it comes to insurance/hospital bills/maternity leave!
I secretly want this baby out NOW but I need her to stay in another week so we can pick up our tractor this weekend and get our new fridge delivered next week. Baby, don't mess with my new appliances.
I feel like I'm going to forget how to drive. I learned and passed my test at the beginning of this year but I stopped driving towards the end of pregnancy because I was scared of being out alone and going into labour. Almost two weeks after having baby now and I'm scared of going in the car again (I live in El Salvador and traffic is always crazy here).
Ive also avoided having epidurals because of cost but I feel like Ive been very lucky with short labours so I completely sympathise with women having harder births wanting epidurals
FFFC: I'm terrified of actually having to birth this baby. I'm so ready to hold her and I know I can totally do this but it's getting kinda scary now that my due date is a week away. I'm only 1.5 cm dilated and still pretty thick so the idea of being induced scares me even more. Whose idea was this anyway??! Lol
I had a total meltdown yesterday in the hospital that I had made a terrible mistake and I didn't want to do this anymore. When it came time today to actually birth these babies, it was like game time. There was no time or energy that could be wasted doubting myself. You can do it mama!
I know I can do this but that doesn't keep me from being scared shitless right now lol. When it's go time I'm sure (hoping) all I'll be thinking about is getting my baby here safely!
@Heathereaddy similarly to @shanparadise I felt during parts of labor that I wasn't going to be able to do it and got scared but honestly, during delivery there was nothing I was more sure of than the fact that I could do it and that I was a badass for pushing a baby out of my body. It was awesome. Painful sure, but really fucking awesome. You can do it!
I had a couple of moments the past few days, mainly right after surgery and trying to get up and go to the bathroom on my own, where I was in so much pain just standing straight. I thought to myself, wtf have I done?! This pain is terrible. But it's getting so much easier every day. As soon as this baby was out, nothing else mattered. I just knew in my heart that everything would work out fine. The nights suck, but the morning comes and you realize you're both still alive. That and coffee. Lots of coffee lol.
Re: FFFC
One of my planned post baby outings will be to see Kanye.
July16 JULY siggy challenge
Married: October 2014
TTC #1 since September 2015
Sweatpants are my BFF.
Married: October 2014
TTC #1 since September 2015
/confession or rant or whatever. Hormones.
FFFC: I asked for my epidural the minute I was admitted into the hospital. I think I was only 2 centimeters?
Edit: add tag
My total bill for after I have the baby will be €0. I don't have insurance or anything, it's completely free here for a woman during pregnancy. I've said it before but the US is crazy when it comes to insurance/hospital bills/maternity leave!
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DS#1 July 2016
Baby #2 July 2018
Ive also avoided having epidurals because of cost but I feel like Ive been very lucky with short labours so I completely sympathise with women having harder births wanting epidurals
Oh oh and baby you better stay in until the 7th because I'm supposed to be seeing Modest Mouse and Brand New and that concert is an hour away!!
I know I can do this but that doesn't keep me from being scared shitless right now lol. When it's go time I'm sure (hoping) all I'll be thinking about is getting my baby here safely!