Pregnancy Spacing

BabyBoyH92016 · June 2016

Hi Ladies,

I came across an interesting article yesterday stating that women should wait at least 18 months between pregnancies. This is a recommendation that has been made by the CDC. I continued to read up on this and it seems to be that 18 months is the minimum but 2+ years is most ideal.

https://www.medicaldaily.com/pregnancy-spacing-mothers-should-wait-least-18-months-between-pregnancies-avoid-329932 I’m only linking one article which links the CDC study, a Mayo clinic study, and a news segment on this (warning, there is an annoying ad that will start playing in the background).

Overall, what I took away from the articles that I read is that getting pregnant before 18 months showed increased risks of health complications to the mother and baby. A few articles linked a higher rate of autism in the second child. There was also talk about lower IQ levels. I don’t believe every article I read on the internet, however I was surprised by how many articles/sources supported this theory that women should wait 18 months or even more. Health and socioeconomic factors do play a factor as well.

I’m 33 and this will be my first baby. My husband and I definitely planned on having more than one child, but since I’m already 33, we don’t want to wait too long. I always figured it would be when we felt ready (and obviously we all know you can’t control when it happens once you start tying), but after reading about this, I wonder if I should take this information into consideration. I definitely will talk to my OBGYN when the time comes for baby number two, but I thought this might be an interesting topic to discuss.

Tippy05 · June 2016

Our first two are 20 months apart, DS2 will be 4 when this baby arrives. It's a bigger gap between #2 and #3 than I would have liked, but things came up that were beyond our control.

I love having the boys close in age and the doctors never gave me any reason to worry or think that anything could be wrong. I did have an emergency c-section for #1 and was told a vbac might not be best since they were so close (something about the scar tissue not being fully healed or something) but that was my decision and again, was never told that was going to be a problem.

I'd talk to your doctor when you're ready and once you get the "all clear" you're good to go!

vampirina · June 2016

This is my first as well, and we don't have a set plan on when we're going to try for #2, but we'll probably start talking about it when this baby is around a year old or so. I think my ideal spacing would be 2-3 years apart (at birth), but like you said, we can't control when we're going to get that BFP once we start trying, and I'd almost rather have them accidentally closer together than further apart then planned.

That said, I have no idea what this baby is going to bring. Who knows he or she could have massive health issues that make planning for a second insurmountable. Or DH and I could hit massive financial trouble. Or I could have a really tough labor and delivery and want to take that into account when thinking about #2. Or I might just not be ready at the one year mark. Or I could be ready 2 months after this one is born...

I've read similar information as you provided, and I think it makes sense. WHO recommends two years between giving birth and conceiving the second kid, I believe, so that mom can heal properly AND mom and dad can properly care for both babies when both children are in their most demanding stage of life. But it's your family, your life. I think you need to see what you can handle and how you do and take it from there.

camichael84 · June 2016

I heard this when I was pregnant for my first. I don't think it should be ignored, but I don't think it should stop you from spacing your children how you'd like. Worth asking your OB about, if you are concerned.

We started NTNP before I was 18 months postpartum. My OB knew we were unofficially trying, and had no concerns. I did want my children spaced out a little more than what they will be, but I'm excited about how it all timed out now.

diagonalley · June 2016

We started trying for number 2 about 14 months after DS1 was born. I think the timeline is in between births, not first birth and next conception? Which had I gotten pregnant right away it would have been a 23 month difference but since it took some time they'll be about 27 months apart.

KimmySchmidt · June 2016

I got pregnant when my first was around 15 months, so they'll be exactly 2 years apart. So far this pregnancy has been a whole lot like the first one. No major complications. No one has shown any concern. 2-3 years is a pretty typical gap.

toimadness1 · June 2016

We were going for a 3 year gap between our first two but it ended up taking 2 years to get pregnant again so they ended up a little over 5 years apart. Considering that we decided not to not try and ended up getting pregnant when #2 was almost 11 months old. Our doctor knew of our plans though and had no concerns considering we had a pretty uncomplicated birth. I think the main thing is just to talk options out with your doctor if you want to space the kids close together as they can give you good input directly for your situation.

AnnaS930 · June 2016

We got pregnant when my first turned 1, so ours will be 21 months apart. I had a vaginal birth with my first, and had to see my OB to restart Clomid to get pregnant with the 2nd.. she raised no concerns about my timing.

Also, friends who have had C-sections are suggested to wait to try to conceive until a year post-birth if they are hoping for a VBAC, but not for any other known concerns.

Alyeena · June 2016

Considering it took us four years to get pregnant and that at this point in time I wanted to be pregnant with my second child not my first I don't have the luxury of waiting 2+ years to try again.

We are planning to do a frozen embryo transfer a year after this baby is born. So unless there is a major issue preventing us from doing so that is what we will do.

danielle1290 · June 2016

DH and I had planned on trying to space our children about 2 years apart, but oops, here we are. DS will only be 17 months old when baby is born. My OB said that we would have to keep an eye on things because of the risks associated with having closely spaced pregnancies, but so far there have been no complications (knock on wood). I am praying that baby girl will have no health issues due to them being so close together, it does make me a little nervous, but there's nothing I can really do about it now.

Sbrown721 · June 2016

I think it would be really nice to have #1 out of diapers before #2 comes along, but I'm sure it can also be so fun to have the 2 close together in age...whatever works for your family!

seitzy3 · June 2016

I've heard this plenty of times. I'm sure there is lots of truth to it considering everything your body goes through to make a baby.

I got pregnant with twins when DD1 was only 9 months. Unfortunately, that ended in a MMC but I got pregnant with DD2 just a few months after that. i did have some issues post partum while I was still in the hospital with Dd2 but it wasn't related to how close the pregnancies were.

I again got pregnant with this baby when DD2 was only 9 months. I haven't had any issues thus far besides feeling more aches and pains this time around.

I've always wanted my children close in age and I asked my midwife what she thought about us trying for number 3 so soon and she wasn't concerned at all...but she did call me crazy.

abberson · June 2016

The linked Mayo clinic article only cites a 12 month wait recommendation unless you had a c-section and want a vbac. The CDC article primarily focused on the statistics of how long people wait. Pregnancy spacing seems to be a pretty personal/individualized topic (mom's age, PGAL/TTC history, etc). (Trigger Warning) I got pregnant less than 12 months after DD and my doc didn't express any concern at the timing. While that was one of several miscarriages I had between DD and this pregnancy, she also assured me that the timing was not the cause. If someone's kids end up closely spaced, I'd hate for a mama to feel like she's in the wrong already, an OB will raise concerns if they're merited. And after you deliver, your doctor will likely give you a go ahead for when to TTC again if that's in your plans. I'd stick with their advice based your personal health history.

rock1cherry · June 2016

My hubby and I are a little older and this is our first so I'm not 100% sure if we will have a second. I've always wanted 2 but it may not be in the cards. We will play it by ear and see how things go and what we'd like to do after we have one.

PSUBecky23 · June 2016

My kids will be about 3.5 years apart. I'm not sure that's going to be enough. My daughter is a handful, to put it lightly.

miam4 · June 2016

I am 33 also. We planned to try after DD was 2 because I planned to breastfeed her until she was 2 (and I did). Her bday was in December, and by January I was getting her out of breastfeeding and got pregnant with #2. You need to ask your doctor (because at 35 it is considered high risk group) and consider what you want. DH and I wanted our children to be about 3 years apart. I work full time, I have no family to help me with anything, so I did not want to have 2 too little ones at the same time. DD by now she wants to help a lot, she understands what we say, and she still is a toddler with tantrums sometimes... this is working for us.

tinypikachu · June 2016

I can definitely see the concern. I'm in my twenties but DH is 37 and this is our first. We originally wanted to have four but waited 3 years after getting married to try and, now that we're pregnant, I just think how I want us to be able to enjoy our retirement and empty nest without teenagers around. After I found out about the recommended 18 months on between pregnancies, I think we'll go for 3. I'm thinking of starting TTC right at 18 months but we'll see how that goes and how we feel with a LO around.

Flowr4246 · June 2016

Connor and morgan will be 18 months apart, almost to the day. I'm not sure if it's spacing or age but I will say that this 3rd pregnancy is kicking my ass WAY more than the other two.

SuperFudge00 · June 2016

DS and LO will be 18.5 months apart. I was 34 almost 35 when I gave birth to DS and I'll be 36 when LO is born. DH is 44. Each family needs to weigh out their own concerns when it comes to its composition.

Initially I only wanted one because DH had two before we met but once DS was here I was determined he needed a sibling close in age. We also delayed TTC because I started college 1.5 years into our relationship and I needed to get my career in place before we made a family.

We are doing what's best for our family.

asht · June 2016

With a csection the recommend no less tha 18 months so your body is healed to carry a pregnancy without risking torn muscles from the weight. My first will be almost 5 when this one comes out. I'm already not looking forward to a year of daycare for two so I am glad I didn't go any closer.

beachmama14 · June 2016

I got pregnant when my daughter was only 13 months. She will be 21.5 months when this baby gets here. The spacing is a little closer than I had hoped for, but my doctor never expressed any concern and I haven't had any complications thus far. We knew we wanted our kids 2-3 years apart so it's not far off from our "ideal". I feel like the recommendations could vary so much depending on the situation. Maternal age, pregnancy or delivery complications in the previous birth, etc. I don't think it's necessarily a "one size fits all" type of thing. I don't feel as if this baby is in any danger because I only waited 13 months instead of 18.

crispy11 · June 2016

I just wanted to add that I had my girls 22 months apart and I had a vbac. Pregnancy spacing wasn't a huge concern for my OB for the vbac. I had to wait for career-related reasons this time so my second will be almost 3.5 when this one comes! Obviously pregnancy isn't something that can be completely planned but I'd like to have 2 under 2 again one day. My girls, while crazy, are very fun. Maybe we can try for 2u2 with babies 4&5 because I really should finish residency and pass the boards before getting pregnant again! That would be roughly 3 year spacing between 3&4. (PS- I'm talking about 4&5 if I could be so lucky! I started at 22 so I have some time on my side, but I'll have to see what comes my way.)

Bibliobebe · June 2016

It's something interesting to think about. We weren't planning on having anymore for a least a few years, but I've never heard of not waiting 18 months being a danger to mom or baby. I can see how it could certainly present the potential of putting stress on mom's body, though.

We're not sure how many years we want between each of ours yet. I do know that I would prefer to be done having kids by the time I'm 36. Since baby #1 will be here around a month and a half before my 30th that gives us 6 years to bring in the others. I personally would prefer to have at least 2 years in between each of ours, to give me time to adjust to each new addition before adding a new one.

However, we use FAM method for birth control, so there's no guarantee we won't get surprised. But that's okay!

SuperFudge00 · June 2016

Questioning the waiting in order to have one doing (insert milestone like potty training) before having another.

My husband tried to make this argument but I countered that I would rather knock it out at once instead of having to start all over again. He says he's tired, we are, but why get back normalcy only to lose it again?

RG1 · June 2016

@SuperFudge00 That's how I feel. I'm a FTM so really don't know how it will all go, but we want ours pretty close together (like 1.5 years) That way the craziness all happens in a short span of years and you get it over with

Kimmy717 · June 2016

AlwaysAuntNeverMom said:

I can definitely see the concern. I'm in my twenties but DH is 37 and this is our first. We originally wanted to have four but waited 3 years after getting married to try and, now that we're pregnant, I just think how I want us to be able to enjoy our retirement and empty nest without teenagers around. After I found out about the recommended 18 months on between pregnancies, I think we'll go for 3. I'm thinking of starting TTC right at 18 months but we'll see how that goes and how we feel with a LO around.

THIS. and what @rock1cherry said. This is my first, but my SO's third baby. I just had my 29th birthday in May, my SO will be 42 in late December. so really not for sure about having another child at this point. I am just waiting to see how i handle motherhood and the lifestyle change before i really consider any more. I always wanted to have 2 kids because my middle brother and i had the best childhood growing up and are very close (we are 15 months apart, dont think BF is a great form of BC, thats how my brother showed up!) BUT we will see how everything goes with Miss Thing first.

mhilpisch10 · June 2016

Well, we will have 3 under 3!
My midwife said that there is a greater risk of preterm labor with babies so close in age. I'm hoping that doesn't happen. dS2 came 3 weeks early, but he was 7lb6oz and perfect. I'm hoping this one stays in until 37 weeks too.
My body is holding up incredibly well, but I do worry that it doesn't haven't enough vit and minerals to give to the baby. It must be sucked dry. But I'm feeling great at least that's something.
We are definitely planning on having more space after this next one.

mhilpisch10 · June 2016

As far as the kids go, our boys are already thick as thieves and are starting to play together at 1 and 2. It gives me so much joy!

chastidylynnn · June 2016

Well I had a c-section in August of 2015, so my son will be a year in a month and a half. I'm due sept 9th but because of my previous c section (less than a year ago) Dr wants baby out at 38weeks, she is being cautious because of the previous c section and says my body hasnt healed just yet. My boys will be a year and a little over a week apart.

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