Cursing around baby

Kurrant · June 2016

Anyone else's husband or SO still swear around baby? He keeps saying it's ok because she is still so young but I really don't like it. I feel like if he doesn't stop now then it will be harder when she is older and repeating everything we say. I really don't want her first time speaking to be dropping f-bombs. I occasionally slip but I'm making an effort. My father swore a ton around me as a kid and I really would like this girl to have a different experience than I did.

tgortney · June 2016

Yes!! We're trying to break the habit now. It'll be too late once they can start repeating words. DH and I try but it's hard when it's been just us for so long. At least our friends have noticed the effort since they commented about it lol

Bellodomani · June 2016

My husband still swears around our 2.5 year old

He knows I don't like it, but it's just not the battle I'm gonna pick. I have told him, when he starts preschool in September and ends up swearing at school, you can be the one who takes work off to go meet with the teacher. But marriage & coparenting is hard enough as it is, and he is a great dad, works a demanding job, more than pulls his weight around the house, makes sure I get out with my girlfriends and sleep in on Saturdays... If swearing around the kids is his vice then I can deal with that.

JoMunson · June 2016

We're still bad- we swear, watch GOT/other inappropriate shows, and my DH loves telling inappropriate jokes. I'm a teacher and DH is a counselor so we sort of feel like we'll know when it's time to start curbing our behavior to be better examples. We're starting now but no need to go cold turkey IMO.

JessicaB0627 · June 2016

DH does occasionally, especially when he comes home from his drill (Army) weekends for some reason. We've only had one incident with DD at school and I'm honestly not sure she even said what they think she said. Other than that we had one incident at home where DH said something and DD immediately repeated it. I made a big deal about it and made DH sit in time out so DD understood that it was not okay for either one of them to say. Either way I don't think she heard those things as a newborn and repeated them 2+ years later. So maybe talk to your husband about trying to be more conscious of what he says and work towards using less curse words for when she's old enough to hear and repeat them. He might make more of an effort when she's older and he realizes that she may actually repeat what he says. I find that DH doesn't think about the future much when it comes to things like that.

thismakes4 · June 2016

I swear more than DH

I have a 4 and 5 year old who know all the swear words but don't say them. I don't curse in front of my 2 year old unless I'm mouthing the word to my friend who also has kids.

Eta: they know the swear words because I didn't want them repeating it at school

kitandcat · June 2016

DH and I both swear here and there and we're not worried about it yet, also not concerned with content of TV shows/movies yet. I think we have quite some time before we have to worry... Altho we don't swear often and I don't think it will be difficult for us to make an easy switch and not swear once LO starts taking it all in :-) Neither of us ever swear in the workplace and when we're around family we also don't swear so we're use to
editing ourselves, also!

NinnyJean · June 2016

DH is better at not swearing than I am but at this point I just tell him as long as we swear in a happy tone of voice it's fine since that's all she picks up on

Sunshinebins · June 2016

We are trying to cut it out here but only one of us is doing a good job

BlueJuice · June 2016

This ship has sailed in our household - swearing happens in front of our kids on occasion, more often from DH but occasionally from me. We have both nixed the incidental/casual use in ordinary conversation, but they crop up when things go south. My 5-year-old DD is also an enormous fan of the musical Hamilton, which is excellent but does feature a number of profanities. We've handled it by teaching her that certain words (and a few phrases that I just dislike intensely) are rude and not for kids to use, because they don't really have the judgment to decide whether their usage is appropriate at a given time. There have been a few occasions where she slipped up and I had to remind her that that's not okay, but essentially she's very conscientious about self-censoring when singing a song with an inappropriate lyric, for example. A few times she has asked for permission to say a grown-up word in order to ask me a question about something, but it hasn't been a big deal and I'm glad we ended up handling it this way.

I wish eliminating whining and the childish rude humor was as easy. Ugh.

missnc77 · June 2016

I'm worse than my husband. I should probably work on it more, but old habits are hard to break.

kbrands7 · June 2016

Both DH and I slip up sometimes with language, but it's not all-day, every-day. DS1 has said hell once, but accepted a redirection to say help instead (which was also logically appropriate for the moment). I'm actually more concerned about general behavior as DS1 seems to pick up on that more readily. For example, if DH is in a moody week and is more demanding/less polite, then DS1 starts to copy that and stops saying please, becomes more impatient and prone to tantrums, etc. Or if I'm feeling stressed and anxious, he tends to model that back too. Thankfully, he copies good behavior just as easily and that tends to stick better since we positively reinforce it.

lizChesnut · June 2016

My husband is always swearing and everyone else we know, friends, uncles... Our 7 year knows people choose to do and say lots of things, that does not mean she should do it. And she knows it doesn't matter where or who said it, she WILL get in trouble if she chooses those words, even when she was little, we never had a problem with her cursing. When she's an adult it'll be her choice but as a kid, it's not allowed. I'll teach this lo the same thing. I use it as a lesson of, we can't control what other ppl do, only our own actions.

Bellodomani · June 2016

kbrands7 said:

Both DH and I slip up sometimes with language, but it's not all-day, every-day. DS1 has said hell once, but accepted a redirection to say help instead (which was also logically appropriate for the moment). I'm actually more concerned about general behavior as DS1 seems to pick up on that more readily. For example, if DH is in a moody week and is more demanding/less polite, then DS1 starts to copy that and stops saying please, becomes more impatient and prone to tantrums, etc. Or if I'm feeling stressed and anxious, he tends to model that back too. Thankfully, he copies good behavior just as easily and that tends to stick better since we positively reinforce it.

This is the same with our toddler- my husband is introverted and easily overwhelmed by chaos, and when his behavior and attitude go downhill, so does my son's. My toddler still has never copied back a swear word he's heard my husband say- which is shocking because he's incredibly verbal and copies back basically everything- but he copies things I find much less tolerable such as slamming doors or using an impatient tone of voice when frustrated. At least with a swear word it's a pretty easy thing to enforce, but it's a lot harder to police tone of voice, though I do try.

lalala2004 · June 2016

We don't curse much to begin with, but we do watch a lot of South Park, so that'll have to change

Cursing around baby

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