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Newbie Intro, Hello, it's me.....

WhiskeyRose88WhiskeyRose88 member
edited June 2016 in Infertility
Hey ladies. I'm new here. DH and I are both 28, married for 5 years and together for 9. We started trying in 2011 after we married. I was really overweight so we always thought that was why I was not getting pregnant. Last year I started my weightloss journey and lost 100lbs. In March I found a new obgyn and he ordered full testing for me and a SA for DH. All of my tests and screenings came back normal and healthy. DH however has zero sperm. We then were referred to a Urologist. DH just finished up all his testing on Tuesday. No genetic issues, low Testosterone, FSH on the high side and diagnosed him with Non-obstructive Azoospermia. Our doctor put him on half a tablet of clomid MWF. Even though he was put on clomid the Dr.  stressed that we pretty much had 0% chance of conceiving naturally and that the clomid was to help chances of sperm retrieval for IVF. My husband is really against non biological children so IVF is my only chance to be a mom. I knew this was a possibility so I obsessively researched before we even got the results back. We're looking at $30k+ and that terrifies me. My best friend started a Gofund Me page basically to pass through church and friends and family but it REALLY bothers me asking people for money. We make plenty of money to care for a baby but we don't just have that huge chunk of money lying around. It's really put me in a depression. I just feel incredibly overwhelmed. How did you ladies get through IVF? How did you find ways to afford it if you didn't have the money to do it already? How did you handle all of the emotions?
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Re: Newbie Intro, Hello, it's me.....

  • Monica54321Monica54321 member
    First off, congrats on your weight loss! I lost 130lbs in the hopes of getting pregnant, but we're getting ready for IVF next month with the lovely diagnosis of "unexplained infertility." Sigh... just when you think you have the answer (lose weight!)... things still don't work out like you plan!

    First off, check your insurance policies for infertility benefits. I have a generally crappy high deductible plan and was pleasantly surprised to find that we have $15k of lifetime coverage for "transfer procesures" (IUI & IVF). If you have no insurance coverage for IVF, one option is to consider one of you finding a new job that does have coverage. If you have to go ahead with no coverage, check and see if your clinic is involved in any clinical trials that you could be part of. Doesn't reduce the cost, but also check to see if your clinic has any "shared risk" program that gives you a refund if your IVF & subsequent FETs are unsuccessful. Another more "out there" option is overseas IVF. We looked into IVF in the Czech Republic and it was less than $4k. There are ladies on these boards that have gone overseas due to the extreme reduced cost of donor egg IVF overseas. No idea if there's anyone with experience with 
    Me (31) & DH (31) - married 2008; TTC since 2013
    SA = normal; HSG = clear; history of DVT/PE
    Diagnosed with unexplained infertility
    IUI #1- April '16 - BFN 
    IUI #2 - May '16 - BFN
    IVF Fresh Xfer #1 (1 blastocyst) - Sept '16 - BFN
    FET #2 - 11/8/16 (2 blastocysts) - Beta on 11/18
    4 more blastocysts on ice
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  • adunkinadunkin member
    Welcome (though I'm sorry you find yourself here)!

    We tapped into our down payment savings fund. Not really ideal, but so it goes. We've also capped it at once for a variety of reasons, but cost is definitely one of them! Like a PP said, international IVf can be loads more affordable. Czech is a nice country (we've been for vacation) and is currently the "darling" of the IVF tourism industry. But lots of other countries cater to Americans when it comes to IVF. Good luck figuring it out!
    ______________________________________________________________________________

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    Trying to conceive #2
    Me: 36 - slight DOR (AMH: 1.1), decent OAR; DH: 41 - Morphology 4%
    NTNP July-Aug 2014, ATTC Sept 2014-Present
    October 2014 - CP
    July 2015 - Clomid + #1 IUI = BFN
    September 2015 - Clomid + #2 IUI = CP
    October 2015 - Letrozole (5 follies - yay!) + #3 IUI = BFN
    November 2015 - CP
    December 2015 - CP
    February 2016 - Letrozole + #4 IUI = CP
    April 2016 - CP
    May/June 2016 - IVF #1 and IUI #5 (Estrace + Follistim + micro-hCG + HGH) = BFN

    Struggled to conceive #1 2012-2013
    Me: Chronic Pain Condition since 2009, DH: Slightly Abnormal SA
    Clomid #1: March 2013 - BFN; Clomid + IUI: May 2013 CXL; BFP on 4/22/13 = Baby Boy #1 1/1/14

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  • WhiskeyRose88WhiskeyRose88 member
    Hi ladies, thanks for the advice. I think for now I wouldn't be comfortable going to another country. I did check our insurance and unfortunately it covers nothing infertility related. My husbands clomid wasn't even covered. The cost is from an insured plan so I guess that's good. The $30k is for 2 fresh IVF cycles and unlimited FET that end in live birth, meds, PGD and icsi
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  • MrsBinPAMrsBinPA member
    @WhiskeyRose88 does your RE do clinical trials?  Mine always has some running for IVF.  If not, it might be worth exploring other REs in your area who might have something you qualify for.  It might be able to significantly reduce any out of pocket for you.
    ****TW****

    Me: 39 DH: 40
    Married: 12/6/2014

    BFP#1: 1/20/15      MC: 2/14/15
    BFP#2: 10/28/15    MC: 11/24/15
    BFP#3:  3/20/16     MC: 4/26/16
    BFP#4:  7/15/16     DD: 3/18/17
    BFP#5:  5/1/18     EDD: 1/12/19
    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker


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  • WhiskeyRose88WhiskeyRose88 member
    No they don't. Unfortunately there aren't a TON of places where I live. I picked the best place in the area and they also work directly with my obgyn who is rated #1 in the city and I love him. I could go to Atlanta which is a few hours away but the price would drastically increase because it's a major metropolitan area. The clinics also have less positive ratings then the clinic I've chosen. My husband is like 1000% against any kind of loan. He's not willing to add debt. He's like on that Dave Ramsay bullshit where you don't buy stuff until you can pay for it all in cash. Also, to be honest, having children is not even a priority for him. It's my life's dream and purpose, for him it's just what you do when you're married and it makes me happy. Now that having children naturally is not apart of our reality he's much less enthused. It's become a financial burden. He's already said we aren't gonna spend $100,000 on kids, i.e. You're only getting one kid cuz I'm not spending $30k every time you want another baby. It just adds to all the stress, anxiety and depression I already feel. 
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  • IsthisthereallifeIsthisthereallife member
    Hi @WhiskeyRose88, I'm so sorry that you find yourself here. Congratulations on your weight loss journey! That's amazing.

    To be honest, it doesn't sounds like you and your DH aren't on the same page. While I'm still very new to this infertility journey - I'm learning that one of the most important things is to make sure that you communicate openly and understand what both of your ultimate goals are. It sounds like if you guys aren't aligned yet, it might be difficult to land in a place that will make you both happy.

    Infertility is such a hard journey - no matter where you are in the road. I hope you get all the support that you need at home and from all of us. Good luck!


    **TW**
    Me: 31, DH:33
    TTC since October 2015: MFI
    Summer 2016: 3 IUI's: BFN
    October 2016: Switched RE's and began IVF cycle 
    December 2016: Retrieved 13 eggs, 12 mature, 9 fertilized with ICSI. 5 day ET of 2 blasts with 4 frosites left. BFP!!!! EDD: 8/30/2017 
    August 25, 2017: It's a Girl!!
    April 12, 2019: FET, BFP!!! Baby BOY EDD: 12/29/2019
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