TTC After a Loss

New to the community (with recent MC and almost 36)

Hi, all,

I just had to tell this app to stop giving me baby growth updates because I just had a MC. I'm of AMA (gasp!), and TTC. This will be my first child. My period was and still is way past due according to my cycle tracker, and I got all excited, but two tests revealed a BFN. So I guess my cycle is just all messed up. Has anyone else experienced this? 

Thanks for your support.

Re: New to the community (with recent MC and almost 36)

  • Cycles can be very wonky post loss. Are you temping?  
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  • So sorry for your loss. My WebMD app haunted me all through my pregnancy that ended with miscarriage. I was constantly getting emails and alerts telling me where I was in the pregnancy. They just kept coming, no matter what I did. Welcome to our little world. 
  • Hello, sorry for your loss. My luteal phase jumped from 13 to 16 days post loss, with the first cycle after loss being 14 days. It's normal that there is no normal for you right now. I had an email from the midwives clinic inviting me to their picnic for mothers and babies last month and it sent me into a terrible tailspin that I'm just crawling out of now. It all sucks. Welcome, though.

    @BornReady I wrote a very angry email to one or the other of those trackers since I unsubscribed for weeks. That worked. I also wrote an angry email to Pinterest and the suggested pins stopped immediately. I'm not an angry email writer, but I just couldn't take it. It was suffocating.
    Renee, 34 + Devon, 29 married 08/13 <3
    TTC  09/15
    *TW Loss mentioned*
    BFP 12/15/15 EDD: 08/26/16
    MMC discovered 1/25/16 at 9 +3
    TTCAL 3/2016
    Acupuncture 11/16
    Dx December 2016: unexplained 
    January 2017: 50 mg Clomid + TI =
    BFP #2 01/30/17  Please be a sticky baby!
    EDD: 10/15/17  Measuring ahead! 10/12/17 
    Ambrose born on his due date!

  • Hi. I'm really sorry for your loss. Unless you are temping to confirm O, it is hard to know if you are really late. Period tracker apps are mostly awful because they assume you have textbook regular cycles. Most women don't, especially after loss, which is the real kicker. Even though I have beautiful 28 day cycles normally, it took 8 weeks to get my first period after this last loss, and this last cycle was only 25 days long. It does help to temp, because I knew I O'd earlier than usual, and thus expected AF may be early, for instance. A lot of us use the Ferility Friend app...it's great!
  • Hi and welcome. Many of us on this board are also AMA. I just turned 37 after 2 losses and will be trying to conceive my first after we make a plan with an RE. I know there are at least 5 or 6 regular posters in a similar boat. I agree with PP about temping, charging, and using OPKs. When was your loss? The Bump at least allows you to post without putting in an EDD or child's birthday. I'm active on the Baby Center's Triploidy, TFMR, and NIPT boards and when I took out my daughters due date after my D&C, they would not let me log in via mobile without entering a EDD or birthday date. Talk about adding insult to injury. I entered some random date and so now the app thinks I have a 7 year old. 
  • welcome, i'm so sorry for your loss. i think it's pretty normal for your cycle to be a bit irregular for a couple months post loss. 
    TW*** Child and loss mentioned
    Married 10/12
    DS 11/14
    Ectopic 2/16
    PCOS/Ovulation Dysfunction 11/16
    IUI x 3- BFN
    Laparoscopy 3/17 Endo and tubal damage
    IVF- 4/17- 40 eggs retrieved, 10 blasts, 7 pgs tested embryos
    FET- 6/17- BFP!
    Due Feb 15, 2017
  • I'm so sorry for your loss. We have similar situations. This was my second cycle since our loss ( which I also had a d&e 17 weeks) and af came five days late. I'm guessing my cycles will be different now.. a bit longer than usual. It really messed with my head. I'm also AMA- will be 36 in Sept and it's my first too.
    Me:35, DH 37  ~ Married July 2014
    ttc July 2015 ~ bfp Nov 2015 (cp)
    bfp Dec 2015 ~ (tfmr 17wk, March 2016, genetic disease)
    ttcal May 2016
  • So sorry for your loss. At the beginning of this month (original EDD is in 10 days), Enfamil sent us some free formula canisters (NO idea why; I've never signed up for anything from them!!), and I just stared at them in shock for several minutes. I'd changed all my info on The Bump and other similar websites, so I don't know how this one got by. I'm hoping it's the only unpleasant surprise we receive. 

    My cycles regulated right away, but my O and TWW symptoms are rather different from those to getting pregnant. So while things haven't changed that much externally - so to speak - I still sense subtle hormonal changes in my cycles post-loss.
  • I am really sorry for your loss.  We just had a recent loss as well. We are using ff to track our cycle.
  • JDMRSJDMRS member
    @Wishilivedinflorida Clue period tracker has actually learned my cycle. I can track BBT, o testing and everything else on there, and after 2 cycles, it figured me out.

  • @jdmrs For sure, some apps are better than others. Not sure what OP is using, but if she isn't temping, it's just going by her average cycle length instead of LP. I hate that many apps default to 28 day cycles and tell the user they are "late" if they deviate from that all. Plus loss throws a monkey wrench in any cycle regularity anyway. Also, "Clue" made me think of Colonel Mustard in the study with a lead pipe...
  • JDMRSJDMRS member
    edited June 2016
    @Wishilivedinflorida hahaha From now on I will imagine AF as Miss Scarlet- lurking with a knife in the bathroom ready to ruin my day....

    edit because I can't finish a damn thought these days... Seriously, some of the apps are a joke. Apple Health didn't even have a period tracker for the longest time. 
  • Hi there! I'm so sorry for your loss. :( I'm 37 and been TTC for 2 years with a loss in December. I hate being AMA. Every month when I get AF I just feel older and older.

    My periods regulated after my first AF but they've actually got a little shorter after my D&C. From average of 30 days to 27 now. Also I get more painful cramps the first couple days of my period. I'm at the stage where I'm debating if it's time to see an RE or keep trying a couple more cycles on our own.
  • I'm so sorry for your loss, but welcome. Lots of good advice here.
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