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September 2015 Moms
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Going to Bed Awake

Plumeria1214Plumeria1214 member
in September 2015 Moms
Our LO is about to turn 8 months and is finally sleeping through the night! We don't know if she's just developmentally ready or if it's a result of the things we started implementing (starting schedule, increasing solids, night light, etc). The week before she started STTN I was up with her for 2-4 hours a night, and I almost lost my mind. 

While she's STTN, I still have to hold her for her to go to sleep for naps and bedtime. I then place her in crib. I tried drowsy bit awake but she just rolls all around and then cries when she's tired. 

Do do I need to sleep train for this or as babies get more active are they more tired and better able to fall asleep on own? I noticed that two days when we were out all day she did put herself to sleep while I was finishing up cleaning downstairs and warming her bottle. 

I know about sleep associations and holding and rocking being ours. I'm just so happy she's sleeping well and she can put herself back to sleep at night. Sometimes early in night I may need to pick her up but not often.

I'm hearing from my parents and in laws that I need to work ok her putting self to sleep initially, all the time now, and it's stressing me out when I want to be celebrating and just enjoy this. 

Any tips? Thanks! 


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Re: Going to Bed Awake

  • hlb8179hlb8179 member
    From what I've read, it's worth working on this now before it gets more difficult for baby to adjust later on.  Because LO is sleeping well currently, though, I would think that you could work on it in baby steps so that it doesn't mess her up too much.  For example, instead of holding her, you could start with patting and shushing her and then progress gradually to being able to just lay her down awake.
    As many others have said on other posts, though, it's ultimately about what's working for your family.
    Married 6.21.2014
    DD #1: 8.16.2015
    #2 EDD: 1.13.2019
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  • kdoak2015kdoak2015 member
    I just wanted to say I don't know many moms that rock their 3/4 year old to sleep, this is just a phase but yes you will likely need to sleep train if you want to rush your baby into developing this skill. Eventually they learn to do it on their own. 
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  • xJKxORxJKxOR member
    We do a 50/50 split I would say. He always nurses before naps and bedtime and I love that cuddle time because he's so busy and on the move now. Sometimes he falls asleep nursing and I cuddle him and then put him in the crib. 

    If hes still wide awake after nursing I put him in the crib as is. He usually fusses, rolls around ALL over, talks to his lovey, kicks the side of the crib, etc. If he starts full out crying and is upset I will go in and cuddle again but usually he just eventually falls asleep on his own (usually takes between 5-20mins). The hardest part for me was realizing when he was just fussing and didn't me (because I always wanted to go in for any little sound and most times he wasn't even crying, just playing) vs when he was actually upset and benefited from me going in. 

    Good luck! 
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  • missliz53missliz53 member
    We had to do sleep training for naps and it was rough. There were times I stood outside her door with my fingers in my ears and let her fuss/cry for 2 mn before going back in. I never let her cry hard, and went in immediately if she started to escalate, but now 95% of the time, I can put her in her crib, give her a pacifier and her little elephant rattle and she kicks and rolls around until she falls asleep. That being said if she is really struggling with separation anxiety and not settling down, I sit in her rocking chair and read until she falls asleep. I don't look at her or engage her in any way. If I have to give her back her pacifier, I put it in her mouth and go back and sit down. And I've rocked her to sleep and then let her nap on me twice when she badly needed to nap, but would just loose it when I put her down. 

    It took a few weeks of letting her fuss it out before she finally got it. And I try very hard to make sure her afternoon nap is at home or the next one will involve some fussing. 
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  • Plumeria1214Plumeria1214 member
    Thanks ladies! I am going to work on it in baby steps but try not to put too much pressure on myself. I'd like her to be able to put herself to sleep by 10 months. She doesn't have any teeth yet, but I know they're coming so I'm going to enjoy the sleep I get now while I can. 
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  • ForeverEverAfterForeverEverAfter member
    Don't do anything drastic!! It's not worth the risk of upsetting the great night sleep. Don't fix if it isn't broken :wink: 

    My LO goes to her crib drowsy, but still wakes a couple times to eat. She's had a 6h stretch since a few weeks old. DD1 never even slept in her crib, and nursed to sleep if I was home until 2yo, and by 2.5yo we were able to just tuck her in and leave the room (never did sleep training, just gradual changes over time). Each child is different, try not to compare yours to others. I started by picturing an ideal bedtime for my family, then took gradual steps towards it.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • PickledPlumsPickledPlums member
    We used to hold our boy to sleep every night, until 2 months ago when I set him in his crib before a nap without holding him because I desperately needed to pee, and when I came back he was sound asleep. Now he won't let us hold him to sleep anymore and it kills me. I say hold them while you can!  
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  • jen83mnjen83mn member
    edited May 2016
    We still rock or nurse our little guy to sleep and I have no plans on stopping anytime soon. He has gone to sleep drowsy but awake in his crib before, and some days when rocking him I can tell he can't get comfortable, so I'll lay him down in his crib awake and he rolls over and goes right to sleep. But other times he wants to snuggle, and I'm going to get as much snuggle time as I can before he grows out of it :) These babies are growing way too fast!!

    (He also puts himself back to sleep when he wakes up during the night and sleeps through the night, so that's good enough for me!!)
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  • chein1chein1 member
    It's totally your own preference. I personally love rocking my babies to sleep. DD1 is 2.5 and although we don't "rock" she still needs to snuggle DH in order to fall asleep. I rock LO to sleep every night and don't lay her down until she's out. It works for us, we enjoy it...we know they won't want/need us to snuggle forever :) 
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