When should I tell my students?

TannaBean · May 2016

I teach 5th graders and am 6 weeks pregnant. I recently had a subchoronic hemorrhage and thought I had lost the baby.

I didn't, but I had to miss 3 days of school to be on bed rest. I've also missed a lot of school this year going through my IVF cycle. I am not allowed to lift hardly anything and need to take it easy, which is why I'm thinking I want to tell my students. They will be good caretakers.

And then I can let them know (partly) why I've missed so much school, I've made a bunch of excuses. :P And yes, they don't need to know everything, obviously.

Any advice?

TannaBean · May 2016

I do have a follow-up ultrasound on Thursday, so I'd wait until then, at least.

TNChick · May 2016

Are you out of school for the year soon? I am waiting until next year, but I probably won't make an official announcement. It is fairly noticeable when I am pregnant, and I am sure they will figure it out soon enough on their own.

Also, am a k-5 counselor, so the fact that I don't have a classroom of my own might make my approach different than what you might do.

TannaBean · May 2016

Yeah, we are out the 26th. Also, I have to move out of my classroom right at the end of the year, so I'll need help packing!

TNChick · May 2016

Get those 5th graders to work!

TannaBean · May 2016

Oh, I will.

They would work regardless the reason - they love helping out in the classroom.

spano41 · May 2016

I personally wouldn't tell them until 23-26 weeks (viability). My personal "rule" is that I don't tell anyone I would feel uncomfortable explaining to them I had a loss. While you might feel comfortable explaining a loss to your students, it might not be something the parents would think is appropriate. I would just say you are having health problems and the doctor says you can't lift things.

egilona · May 2016

I'm also a teacher (6th-8th) and am trying to decide when to tell my students too! I'm currently thinking that I'll tell my principal toward the end of the year (which will be at around 8 weeks for me) so that she has plenty of time to plan logistically for next year (covering my maternity leave, etc.). When I meet with her, I also plan to ask when she recommends that I tell the kids. If you've already told your principal and/or coworkers, I'd see what they suggest. I had a coworker who waited and told everyone when she was just starting to show, but the timing's trickier for us, I think! I'm not sure if it's better to announce before summer or show up after and let your bump do the announcing for you. I'd personally prefer to avoid the comments I'm sure they'll make if the figure it out on their own, but I'm also hesitant to say anything too early. If I have to make the call of when to tell all on my own, I'll probably tell my students on the last day of school.

kaswanson · May 2016

With my last pregnancy I think I told my students around 20 weeks. Or maybe a little later. Once I got a bit of a bump going and people were starting to wonder.

TannaBean · May 2016

I think part of me just wants to tell them because I won't get to see them next year, and school is out soon. They are moving on to middle school and I'm moving to a new school as well. If I decide to tell them, it will be the last day of school.

xinran · May 2016

I think I probably don't see the harm if they are not going to be aware of the outcome. Of course nobody wants anything to go wrong but if God forbid it did you would not want to tackle the topic. However if that can't come up then it is not really an issue

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