Is a bassinet necessary? Worth having?

AmandaR417 · May 2016

DH and I were discussing registering for some items we'll need (at this point, I don't know if we'll have a shower, but I want to get the completion discount for some bigger items). His mom is buying us a crib and I mentioned we will still need a bassinet...he wanted me to explain why we need both.

I guess I'd always thought it was necessary, but maybe it's not... Our bedroom is plenty big to put the full crib in for however long it is until baby moves to his/her own room, so we don't need to worry about space. Plus, we've got three dogs that generally sleep in our room with us, so a crib might be more secure/stable. My one point in favor of a bassinet was that we could get one that fits right next to the bed so I wouldn't have to get out of bed to feed. This sounded great until DH pointed out that don't you have to change baby each time you feed anyways, so bassinet or not, you've still got to get up?

I'm hoping some of you could offer insight into whether or not a bassinet is worth having. STMs: Did you have a bassinet? Did you/LO like it? In your opinion, is a bassinet necessary it at least with having, or is it something that you could live without?

DunkinDecaf · May 2016

Absolutely get a bassinet for your bedside. If you can get one that you're able to move around the house with you so you can set it up downstairs or something for naps that's even better.

eta: I never changed DD's diaper during the night unless I thought she had pooped. It wakes baby all the way up and makes getting back to sleep so much harder.

ShallowSeas · May 2016

I don't have any children yet so I can't speak from personal experience, but my mom told me that I would love having a bassinet and that she always had one with me and my 2 other sisters, so I'm taking my mom's advice and getting a bassinet. I plan on using it beside our bed for awhile.

Knottie1458416769 · May 2016

Halo swivel bassinet! Just from watching the demo videos, I'm convinced we will need it for the first two months. After that might put baby in crib and get rid of the bassinet.

msu_gal · May 2016

Ok, FTM here too, curious about this subject. So....am I the only one that thinks me trying to feed the baby in the middle of the night will wake up DH and cause him not to get any sleep too? Maybe I'm too nice, but he does have to go to work and I will be home on maternity leave. He should sleep.

shevaCC · May 2016

I'll be the perhaps lone dissenter here. I had a co-sleeper and I *maybe* used it for the first week with DD. I also only changed diapers if I thought there was poop, but mainly I was getting so little sleep that I fell asleep nursing every time. It quickly became obvious that it was safer to make my bed a safe cosleeping environment than to fall asleep in a chair or on a couch that wasn't a safe place for baby. I never put baby back in the cosleeper after the very first wakeup since I was asleep myself. After a month we bought a RnP and I used that for some naps and for the rare times I wanted to put baby somewhere else besides my bed.

ANZ116 · May 2016

My sister had twins two years ago and swears by rock n plays instead of bassinets. She mentioned what @DunkinDecaf mentioned- that you can carry them all around then and they can nap downstairs during the day.

FallenLeaves1990 · May 2016

I had a bassinet given to me and DD never slept in it. She stayed next to our bed in her pack n play. I've since given that bassinet away and won't be buying one for this baby. Its totally up to you!

m6agua · May 2016

FTM here so no experience. My BFF just had her first last August. She said the bassinet was a waste. I think it depends on your house/schedule though. She lives in a small ranch where the babies room is very close to hers. She also said most of the time she was getting up and going into the babies room to feed/change anyway. Also she didn't want to disturb her husband with moving around and lights. She stopped using the bassinet early on.

I plan on just using the crib and the baby will sleep in their own room. It is just a couple steps away from my room. My other thought is that it gives me a little extra exercise (I know its not much) and will get me more alert for feeding and whatnot.

Katemr1146 · May 2016

We used the pack n play next to our bed as a bassinet the first 2-3 months. I'm getting a halo bassinet for ease of use and space saving this time around. Is it necessary - no, but I'd at least put it on your registry. Maybe some nice aunt will buy it, and if not - you can reevaluate your needs closer to baby day.

shevaCC · May 2016

@msu_gal, my DH tends to choose the couch at first but you're going to want to make it as easy on yourself as possible. You're also going to need some amount of help overnight at first, even though you're home and he's working. That level of sleep deprivation is physically painful and crazy-making. Different couples find different solutions; we took shifts. I went to bed at 8pm and he stayed up until 1-2am responding to baby's every peep immediately so I could sleep. Then I took all wakeups after that. He then could get 5-7 hours of sleep most nights depending on when he needed to leave for work.

jstinkz · May 2016

I used the bassinet with DD until she was 3 months then I moved her into her own room and into the crib. While we got a lot of use out of the bassinet ours was a hand me down. I'm not sure that I would actually buy one. Although I do like the compactness of it and DD slept well in it. I guess I'm just glad I didn't have to even think about whether to buy or not.

I also don't change unless poop.

@msu_gal I felt the same way about waking DH at night, plus I never wanted the baby to co-sleep with me so I nipped both of those in the butt by always taking the baby to the glider in her room to nurse. It worked great for us. There were a few nights I was tempted to give in and just nurse right there in my bed, but looking back I'm so glad I never caved. DH never said that her crying before I got to her would wake him up either so he was good to go to work

Knottie1458416769 · May 2016

@msu_gal I don't feel that nursing in bed would be that detrimental to DH's sleep - after all, I get up every couple hours now to use the restroom. We are already practicing now - my bedtime is nine and I set my alarm for 430am, while DH goes to sleep at 1/2/3am and wakes up at 8am.
Plus, even though my maternity leave might be longer than his paternity leave, it takes two to tango and birth is no joke - so it's not like I'm taking a vacay while he's going back to work. Have a feeling @NatashaSprout might feel similarly, given her past shared sentiment on DH's sticking it out in the delivery room

sweetlyuntied · May 2016

If your room is big enough to accommodate a crib, then a bassinet isn't strictly necessary. I just used a PNP for the first few months with DD, but found that I really would have preferred a cosleeper. its one of the only big baby items on my list now.

@msu_gal my H usually wanted to be in the room with us. If he really needed to sleep he'd sometimes use earplugs. In terms of lights, we had a Smart Bulb in our room that I would turn on to nurse and do diaper changes. I would keep it on red on the dimmest setting, it never bothered H and I think it might have helped DD go back to sleep easier.

But honestly after a few weeks (and when we got out of the phase where you have to look for poops after each feeding) I would wake up as soon as DD made a noise, before she even started crying, and didn't even have to turn on a light. I'm a light sleeper to begin with and you start to get in tune with the waking up sounds. Since I was nursing, I was usually the only one who would get up.

But, for formula feeding families, a lot of times the parents divide the night into shifts. Maternity leave, as you might find, is very much a job too. I found it to be just as exhausting, if not more so, than working for a full day. Some BFing moms also found it helpful if their partner would get up to bring the baby to them, or maybe did the diaper chance. I think you'll find what works for you after a few weeks. And if H does end up sleeping - again I recommend ear plugs and a smart bulb!

msu_gal · May 2016

Thanks for all the great feedback. I was thinking like @Katemr1146 said, I was going to buy the Nuna Sena (I'm kinda obsessed with Nuna products) and I can always use that bassinet early on if I want LO to sleep somewhere else in the house. But I'm not registering, I'm buying my stuff myself, so any repeat momma advice is appreciated.

hellopartyof5 · May 2016

My DH and i had a deal. I did all the feeding (EBF) and he changed all the diapers in the beginning. So especially for awhile in the beginning when all they do is poop, he woke up every time I did. I also don't know if cribs cab fit through doorways and I have a feeling they don't. Having to disassemble and assemble again in the nursery sounds like a huge pain.

Greencows4812 · May 2016

I coslept with my first because he literally would not sleep at night in anything else (during the day he'd happily sleep in anything). My second slept in a rock n play and I loved it! I had to have a csection with my second and it made the nights DH was out or said he needed a night (we each did this but not frequently) much easier because I didn't have to get fully out of bed. It also made rocking back to bed for those times he'd barely wake much easier. It was also easy to fold and move around the house or take to grandmas. I got mine at Once Upon a Child for $30 so they don't have to be pricey.

MollySm · May 2016

We used an Arms Reach Cosleeper with both of our kids and will again with the third. It fits right up next to the bed, with the side on the bed lower so it's super easy to get baby in and out. I am the type that physically can't fall asleep with baby in bed with me, so it was perfect for us. I also prefer to start with something flat that doesn't rock for sleep (it's easier not to start something that we have to transition out of at some point if we don't have to).

mrs_hoyahoo · May 2016

I think the main point is that you'll probably want a place for baby to sleep in your room whether it's a crib, a bassinet, Rock N Play, or whatever. There's nothing magical about a bassinet - just think about what you might want (something that rocks? Something that allows you to watch the baby? Something small?) I personally will be avoiding the RNP this time around because my first had the hardest time transitioning from that to the crib.

For the first month, I think we changed him at every feed for the purpose of getting him fully awake. Otherwise he wouldn't eat efficiently and I'd spend longer trying to get him to stay awake to eat. He never had a problem going back to sleep though, so it wasn't something I worried about.

Thewizardofrhythm · May 2016

Everything @MollySm said.
@msu_gal like pp said, I felt the same way at first but things changed fast once I realized how much harder maternity leave is than working. I work part time, and even now after 19mo, I can tell you without a shred of doubt that my childcare days are much harder than my work days. You will want to make yourself the most comfortable because you will be the most exhausted. I found that very quickly it was me who DH was trying to accommodate and rightfully so. It was very rarely an issue but if there was ever a night that our son wouldn't settle or woke DH up, he went and slept on the couch.

tatertat313 · May 2016

We ended up buying one the week after he was born, I would nurse DS in the living room and if it looked like he was going back to sleep I needed somewhere to put him down and just dose off on the couch (I didn't feel comfortable with him sleeping in the swing while I was sleeping), so a bassinet was a great option for the living room...his Pack n play was in our bedroom

mrs_hoyahoo · May 2016

Just one more thing I want to add to the point of handling the night time feedings and diaper changes by yourself while DH sleeps. This definitely gets more doable as LO get older. But for those first weeks at least, there will probably be things you need to do to take care of yourself before and after those nighttime feedings. I had a whole routine I went through to attend to my poor abused nips - having DH handle the changing and swaddling was super helpful in keeping my own awake time as short as possible too.

MollySm · May 2016

As far as H's helping, I also think it's very easy in those first days (especially if your H doesn't get any leave) to settle into mommy knows how to do everything, can get baby back to sleep more quickly, etc. And it is very hard to get back out of that mindset. I know my H has had lots of his friends talk to him and tell him how excluded they felt, and how all they heard was, "Give baby to me, I can do it". On the opposite end I had so many friends in my mom's group that found that after they went back to work, or when baby got older, baby wasn't interested in dad's style because they were so used to mom's, and it was hard to get dad back to a good level of involvement. I found keeping my H very involved from the start, and trying to let it go when he did things differently than I did, were two of the best things I did for my kids and for my relationship

BlondeSunnyDays · May 2016

Hi! I don't participate often but want to more and love talking about baby stuff! We used a pack and play in our room for the first 3 months. It was nice to still have the crib in the nursery for naps during the day. We just got the cheapest basic pack and play from Graco and used it with the bassinet feature that raised it up so that the sleeping area was raised up. You'll want a pack and play anyways if you ever plan on traveling or staying with family so it'll be dual purpose instead of just buying a bassinet that you'll only use for a few months. Good luck choosing!

Oakleypoozles · May 2016

Well, a bassinet is definitely not NECESSARY. I mean you could totally get by without one no doubt. As far as it being useful though I'm totally a believer in that though. My first son really enjoyed the bassinet and at that time the one I had, had wheels so it was really convenient throughout the day to wheel it around the house and place him in it when he was ready for naps. My son in particular really appreciated his "alone" time and didn't want to be messed with while he was sleeping.

What kind of dogs do you have? We have big ones and now that you mention it, depending on your dogs behavior (mine are big dumb oxen) I can see how a bassinet could be dangerous. I think you could avoid that concern with one of the Arm's Reach Co Sleepers though. Like this one: https://www.amazon.com/Arms-Reach-Concepts-Co-Sleeper-Bassinet/dp/B00DMCYENW/ref=sr_1_1_s_it?s=baby-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1463138938&sr=1-1&keywords=arms+reach+co+sleeper

They actually are secured to your bed so dog bumps wouldn't matter.

As far as having to change them every time you feed them it's been a while and during that first little period of baby being born sleep deprivation is high haha. I remember changing baby a lot but I remember the bassinet still feeling useful. You get kinda creative when your tired. If you have the changing stuff right there you could feed , change on your bed (don't worry your diaper skills will become amazing) and just put back in bassinet. It would definitely shorten the nightly rituals.

TinyAlligator · May 2016

@Oakleypoozles we have dogs and they did just fine with the bassinet. It's not like the thing is easy to knock over.

We got a bassinet because of space limitations in our old house. It was nice because in the morning I could roll the thing down the hall to the living room (can't do that with the pnp) and it was a great place for napping. I am also a lone wolf and we never got a rocknplay. My kiddo is a heavy sleeper and we changed diapers at feeding times because it helped wake her up enough to get a decent feed, but we were in a unique situation and HAD to get her fed every 4 hours for the first 6 months.

kms456 · May 2016

I think it depends on your whole plan. I had an emergency C with DD1 and needed lots of help the first few weeks. DD1 was in her home room from day 1 (right beside our room). When she woke, DH would get up and change her because it was harder for me to get around. He would bring her to me and I would feed her. When I was done, he'd put her back in her crib. We had a PnP downstairs that we used for during the day if I didn't want to climb the stairs.

Once DD was older and I went back to work, we took turns doing night time feeding. Obviously if you are EBF and not using bottles that wouldn't work.

That's what worked for us. That may not be what works for you. I think you have to talk to your significant other and develop a game plan for how it will go.

sugar9277 · May 2016

I did not get a bassinet with my first and don't plan to with this one. He slept in his crib from the day we brought him home.
Someone did give me a really pretty Moses basket, but I never needed it for the baby; my cats sure loved it, though.

Muscatmommyof4 · May 2016

I've used a bassinet with all 3 of my kids and plan on using it with this baby as well. With my third child I had one by my bed and one down stairs they are awesome! And both of mine had baskets underneath so I always made sure there was diapers, wipes, a changing pad, extra set of clothes ext... Just in case anything happened in the middle of the night I had everything. I couldn't imagine not having one!

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