Trouble TTC

balancing work and Dr appointments

edited May 2016 in Trouble TTC
Does anyone else have difficulty balance work and RE appointments? right before I started seeing my RE last month I got drafted into a project at work (the RE appointment was already made at that point) which completely changed my work hours to the exact hours the RE is open :(  since then I have had to use some sick time to make my appointments but it has been difficult. I feel my bosses expect I should be here, especially since it is a small team project....the project is through Aug or Sept but luckily my schedule will return to normal May 16th- which means I need to be at work by 9:30am.. the RE opens at 8:30 so if I can get the first appointment of the day for appointments i'm good...but it will be tough. 

I know some are lucky to have super flexible jobs... is there anyone like me who has less flexibility and how do you balance?
Me: 36 years old   DH: 42 years old
Married: 05.2012  
TW:
TTC #1 Since April 2016
HSG/FSH/AMH/E2/SA all normal DX: unexplained IF

spontaneous BFP 01/01/2017-  Alexander was born sleeping 04/13/2017 at 19w1d  ic/chorio
September 2017 HSG #2 & Gonal-F/Femara/Ovidrel/IUI #1 = ep (Salpingectomy of left fallopian tube)
spontaneous BFP 01/02/2018  EDD Aug 30th  It's a GIRL!
Cerclage placed on 03/02BabyFruit Ticker  Cerclage removal 08/02

Re: balancing work and Dr appointments

  • DH's job is not very flexible and u fortunately he's just had to use PTO to cover his absence.  We're fortunate that he doesn't have to be there for every appointment because I can see how this can become an issue.  When we start IVF and appointments are more frequent we are thinking he will just have to talk to his supervisor and tell them what's going on so they don't get suspicious. 

    Me 36 DH 34 - Married May 2010
    DX: PCOS/Unexplained Infertility/MTHFR Mutation
    TTC since December 2014
    Fresh Transfer: Gonal, Menopur, Cetrotide. ~ Chemical Pregnancy :(  
    FET #1: 1st Beta- 3,792~ 2nd Beta- 4,227~ BFP ~ Miscarriage at 8 weeks :( 
    FET #2: 1st Beta 207~2nd Beta 235~ BFP~ Miscarriage at 6 weeks :(
    FET #3: 1st Beta 18~ 2nd Beta 44~BFP~ Miscarriage 5 weeks :(
    FET #4: 1st Beta 50~ 2nd Beta 97.7~ Miscarriage 6 weeks 5 days :(
    FET#5: 1st Beta 29~ 2nd Beta 109~ 3rd Beta 227~ 4th Beta 661~ Miscarriage 5 weeks 3 days 
    Miracle Natural BFP Estimated Due Date June 2019~ God is good 
    2 snow babies 






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  • It's tough because we get very little notice for appointments sometimes.  I know I'll have a 2 day notice for our IUI and I'll want to take that day off completely (I've had pretty bad O and uterus cramps the days of both my IUIs).  Honestly there is nothing we can do about it because we don't get a say on when we have to go to the RE :(  I haven't told my boss what I'm doing but I know others on here have and they've found that very helpful.  Early on in our journey I decided that I will do whatever it takes, so if it means I have to be out of the office last minute (or take several days off in a row once we get to IVF) I will do it.
    ***BFP & Child Warning***

    Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
    IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
    IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
    FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
    FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
    FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
  • Thanks ladies ! I know my job is safe as long as i have  PTO to cover but I do get concerned about the appearance of me taking the time off...however at 34  years old this has to be a priority....has anyone successfully gotten FMLA approved for IUI or IVF appointments ? I talked to my HR dept - just trying to proactively get information before it gets that far and apparently we use a third party to manage our LOAs...so I need to reach out to them 
    Me: 36 years old   DH: 42 years old
    Married: 05.2012  
    TW:
    TTC #1 Since April 2016
    HSG/FSH/AMH/E2/SA all normal DX: unexplained IF

    spontaneous BFP 01/01/2017-  Alexander was born sleeping 04/13/2017 at 19w1d  ic/chorio
    September 2017 HSG #2 & Gonal-F/Femara/Ovidrel/IUI #1 = ep (Salpingectomy of left fallopian tube)
    spontaneous BFP 01/02/2018  EDD Aug 30th  It's a GIRL!
    Cerclage placed on 03/02BabyFruit Ticker  Cerclage removal 08/02
  • Hi @harleyquinn612  unfortunately I don't have much experience to offer you with using FMLA or other means for time off for appointments, in fact my job doesn't even qualify for a lot of those benefits since the company is so small.  And my PTO is VERY limited.  Most of my time off has been unpaid.  At some times my job is flexible, but I am an event planner, and we have large events 20 weeks out of the year, so on event weeks it is difficult to take time off.  While the company/job may not be flexible, my boss is very flexible and understanding - I told her for medical reasons I had to see a specialist and get some testing done along with some follow up appointments.  Legally I don't have to tell them I'm trying to get pregnant.  I've done my best to book appointments first thing in the morning and I gave my boss all the dates in writing, letting her know what days I would be late, and offered to work late those days so as to not fall behind.  Maybe arrangements like that are an option for you?  When I've had an appointment in the middle of the day, I offered to make up time from home as well, as my work can be done from home, but it is not encouraged.

    My office is very tight knit, and without knowing exactly what I've been going through, they are concerned and offering support which is nice.

    I'm sure it will be more difficult if we start doing IUI, IVF, etc. But I'm just trying to take it one step at a time.
  • I am able to use my sick time as needed for any appointments. All of our vacation and sick time stuff is all processed online so I can do it myself and really not speak to my boss. She isn't often impressed when things are last minute, but I see it as I'm entitled to that time and legally I don't have to tell them what is going on.

    I do think I am going to do the same thing as you @jojomama25 and just tell my immediate supervisor that I have some things going on and will require some last minute appointments. Luckily the appointments can be made as early at 7:00am so I don't have to book too much time off work.


    Me: 30 DH: 33

    Married: February 15, 2013

    TCC: October 2013

    MFI- low count/morphology

    May / June 2016- Monitored cycle and TI- BFN

    June / July 2016- Gonal-F + IUI #1- BFN

    August 2016- Gonal-F + IUI #2-

  • yeah i figure i have the time, i'm entitled to take the time and this is a priority for me.... I just feel like i get 'looks' haha and that might just be me projecting  :/  I had an appt this morning and a follow up in two weeks... this morning was really last minute but I can preplan the one in two weeks at least
    Me: 36 years old   DH: 42 years old
    Married: 05.2012  
    TW:
    TTC #1 Since April 2016
    HSG/FSH/AMH/E2/SA all normal DX: unexplained IF

    spontaneous BFP 01/01/2017-  Alexander was born sleeping 04/13/2017 at 19w1d  ic/chorio
    September 2017 HSG #2 & Gonal-F/Femara/Ovidrel/IUI #1 = ep (Salpingectomy of left fallopian tube)
    spontaneous BFP 01/02/2018  EDD Aug 30th  It's a GIRL!
    Cerclage placed on 03/02BabyFruit Ticker  Cerclage removal 08/02
  • I live 40 minutes from work, my medical providers are near my house so its not like I can leave in the middle of the work day and then go back to work for an appointment because I would probably be gone 2 hours.  I try to make my appointments first thing or late afternoon.  I hate leaving early from work because I am a children's counselor so if I leave early that means a kid doesn't get their weekly counseling session.  I also have weekly fertility acupuncture which I schedule late afternoons.  When it comes down to it, if I want to be seen really badly by my doc I take the soonest opportunity even if it is right in the middle of my work day.  As women we often put others needs before our own and feel a lot of guilt for putting ourselves first. I have to remind myself that if I don't take care of myself I wont be my best at work.
    TTC since May 2015 with domestic partner of 13 years. Me 33 OH 33.  No ovulation or natural menstruation. Normal SA.
    Diagnosed PCOS February 2016
    First cycle 50mg Clomid 5/3/16, O'd CD 19 BFN
    Second cycle 50mg Clomid 6/1/16 O'd CD 18 BFN
    Third cycle Clomid 6/29/16 O'd CD 16 BFP @11dpo!
    EDD April 3 and praying things work out!
  • It's tough to take time off. Looking at getting more proactive with treatments and I'm very curious to see how that will pan out with my work :/ 
  • @smokinangel i know, it's difficult right now but I cant imagine what is going to happen if I need to get more aggressive treatment  :/ 
    Me: 36 years old   DH: 42 years old
    Married: 05.2012  
    TW:
    TTC #1 Since April 2016
    HSG/FSH/AMH/E2/SA all normal DX: unexplained IF

    spontaneous BFP 01/01/2017-  Alexander was born sleeping 04/13/2017 at 19w1d  ic/chorio
    September 2017 HSG #2 & Gonal-F/Femara/Ovidrel/IUI #1 = ep (Salpingectomy of left fallopian tube)
    spontaneous BFP 01/02/2018  EDD Aug 30th  It's a GIRL!
    Cerclage placed on 03/02BabyFruit Ticker  Cerclage removal 08/02
  • My job is flexible but DH's is not. He talked to his manager about our IF treatments and explained that he may need to leave for 1-2 hours some days with a day or so notice. His boss okayed it if DH could give a bit more advanced warning so what he does is on CD10 tell the boss that he will need to take the 1-2 hours in the next 7-10 days.
  • JDW0325JDW0325 member
    I just decided to tell my coworkers. I work in a very small office (5 people total) so we are all very close. I left out some of the super personal details but everyone knows the gist of it! They are all really supportive but I do have to use a lot of PTO for this (of course). When I start IUI next month it's a minimum of 4 appointments (from what it sounds like) so this will definitely get more challenging! 
  • My FS cycle monitoring appts are at 7am every time, so I am able to make them most days. DH works two hours away, but can work from home on most of the days of my appts. My IUI treatments landed on the weekend this time which was really helpful as well! I also told my supervisor so if I am a bit late, she is quite understanding!
    Me: 31 DH: 32
    Married: 10/4/14, Together Since: 5/21/06
    Children: 1 (girl, 3 years)

    TTTC #1 since April 2015, Started Treatment Dec 2015
    5 Cycles of IF treatment until BFP! (IUI, Gonal-F, Letrozole)
    BFP: September 5th, 2016
    Born: May 22, 2017

    TTTC #2 since September 2020, Currently in Testing phase 


    BabyFetus Ticker
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