Husband HATES my favorite boy name :( — The Bump
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Husband HATES my favorite boy name :(

I've grown extremely attached to the name Milo.  I think I like how it's uncommon without being weird, and I just like the sound of it.  Unfortunately, my husband absolutely can't stand it.  He says it sounds wimpy.  His choices for a boy are Wendell and Emerson.  Does anyone see any common ground in our names that I'm not seeing?  Our boy may end up nameless.
TTC #1 since June 2015
BFP #1 Nov 2015 ended in MC Dec 26 2015
BFP #2 Feb 2016, EDD Nov 8 2016

Re: Husband HATES my favorite boy name :(

  • My DH vetoed my fav boy name, and I in turn vetoed his (not as revenge, I just wasn't going to use it).
    So we scrapped both names and started the compromise list. PP is right, both parents should at least like the name. We made a whole other list of names to choose from and decided when it came time (we were team green) we would choose from the top three. 
    It ended up that he came around to my original name choice tho, so we went with that. So don't give up hope, you may get Milo in the end!
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  • Miles is our next boy name. It reminds me of miles o'brien from Star Trek. And he definitely wasn't a wimp. Wendell is more wimpy in my opinion. I like the nickname Milo and also Smiley. But if DH doesn't like it there's not much you can do. 
    My TTC History:
    2009: missed miscarriage #1 at 9 weeks (trisomy 16)
    2010: Infertility
    2011: Diagnosis and treatment (low sperm count, anastrozole for DH, clomid for me + IUI)
    2012: Baby #1
    2014: Baby #2
    October 2015: missed miscarriage #2 at 11 weeks (trisomy 22)
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  • ktlanyktlany member
    edited May 2016
    Miles, then you just nn Milo.
  • Thank you!  I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks Wendell is ridiculous.  Also, he already named our cat Wendell.
    TTC #1 since June 2015
    BFP #1 Nov 2015 ended in MC Dec 26 2015
    BFP #2 Feb 2016, EDD Nov 8 2016

  • Both mom and dad get veto power. I'd start brainstorming new ideas. Boys names feel much harder to me and we fought until we found ONE name we both really like together for baby #2. It will happen! 
  • Wendell sounds wimpy. And obviously you can't name your kid after your cat. I like Milo, but prefer Miles. 

    I I guess you're going to have to keep looking! Good luck!
  • delujm0delujm0 member
    Thank you!  I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks Wendell is ridiculous.  Also, he already named our cat Wendell.
    I don't think Wendell is ridiculous, I mean it's a real name...but you definitely cannot name your kid after your cat, that is crazy, and I love cats.

    You both need to agree on a name.  Time to compromise.  If DH hates Milo, Milo is out.  Fwiw, Milo will never not make me think of the cat from the movie Milo and Otis.  Ironically, I think Milo is a cat name and Wendell is a person name and you have the opposite thing going on here.  Start over.
    Me: 37 DH: 37
    Married 5-31-14
    DD1 born 6-21-15
    DD2 born 6-11-17
    DS born 9-5-18

  • I don't hate any of the three names in question, Milo, Wendell and Emerson.  However you or he does so they need to be vetoed.  My H vetoed some of my favorite names but we were able to compromise all three times.  Maybe try having each of you create a list of say 25-30 names you both like and go through them together.  Although it can be tough I guarantee you can find some mutual ground. 

  • Get rid of Wendell if that is the cats name. While I don't think that Wendell is ridiculous (and love the nickname, Dell), its already a name that was used in the family by a pet.  

    My husband and I went through the same thing over four years ago, and funny enough, it was the name Milo and he also thought "It sounds like a kid who gets his a** beat on the playground...." He refused to budge. He also hated my favorite girl name (which is still my favorite girl name). In the end, we picked a name that we both liked (we ended up with a girl), but there was a boy name that we had both agreed on as well (and it sadly, wasn't Milo). This time around, I didn't even bother putting any names on the list that I knew weren't his style and he would never agree my favorite boy and girl names. Instead, I put the names that I "liked" on there, that I knew he wouldn't hate and would be okay with as well. Now 14 weeks later, we still have the list looking the same, because we like all of the names the same and don't love one over the other. We will get there though.

    I agree with the other posters, of each making a list and going from there. Then put the list away for awhile, and come back to it...then see how you feel about those remaining names, and start marking some off. But there has to be compromise on both ends. 
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  • KyleeWallerKyleeWaller member
    edited May 2016
    My husband and I each had the ultimate power of veto with every name when it came to our child's first name: We both had to like it, for it to make the cut. In turn, we agreed I had free reign with a MN for a girl, and he had free reign with a MN for a boy. We ended up with a girl this time around, and my husband stuck to this word: He would give his opinion and then say, "but the middle name is up to you."

    Maybe yourself and your husband could compromise like this? I think it's a good way to use the names that you love, but your spouse isn't too hip on.
  • @delujm0    Weirdly enough, I also kinda like the name Otis.  Maybe that movie had a big impact on psyche as a child?

    @PhoebeJune1984   I hadn't thought of the nickname Dell.  That's really not bad!  Still the cat's name, though.

    Thanks everyone for the advice!  I guess I need him to sit down long enough to make a decent list of names..
    TTC #1 since June 2015
    BFP #1 Nov 2015 ended in MC Dec 26 2015
    BFP #2 Feb 2016, EDD Nov 8 2016

  • In my experience, it doesn't work to try to win someone over to your name, esp if they "hate" it. It's hard work, but you have to find a name that you both like- even if one of you likes it better than the other. It can't be a love/hate thing.

    DX PCOS Jan 2012
    IUI #1 Feb 2012= DS1 born 11/2012
    Unmedicated BFP (first post-weaning cycle)=DS2 born 9/2014
    Unmedicated BFP (first post-weaning cycle again)= EDD 11/2016
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