Maternity Leave with Toddler

blessdtxas · April 2016

For mamas who work and have toddlers - what do you plan to do with them during your maternity leave? Will you continue to send them to daycare? Full time? Part time? Or keep them home with you for the 12 weeks? I have no clue what to do and wanted to hear your plans!

DiFazette · April 2016

I really don't know yet. I was going to keep DS in preschool 3 days/week. I work for my in laws and I'll be finding out this weekend (when we announce to family) if I even have any maternity benefits. I'm part time, but full time on the books, and their business is in another state. I'm not sure how it'll be classified. That will be a big part of our decision. $600/mo for part time daycare is a big bill if I'm getting nothing.

Gizmo1231 · April 2016

I'm not sure yet. I could see sending DS 2 days a week but he only typically goes 3 so it wouldn't be that big of a difference.

jdarlinghunt · April 2016

A friend strongly urged me to keep our families schedule as close to normal as possible. The 1st 6 weeks she sent her 2 year old to her regular sitter a few days a week and all was well. She said she felt guilty so kept her home the next 6 weeks and it was very rough. I think I will stick to my schedule as much as possible.

blessdtxas · April 2016

@DiFazette I hope you have benefits! That would be a big bill otherwise. @Gizmo1231 that would be nice - not too big of a change in schedule for him.

I need to talk to my care provider and see what she would prefer. My son is the only one in her in-home daycare. She might welcome the break for a few weeks. I'm also really anxious to hear what she says about taking on another kiddo. She hasn't been accepting any new kids and I think she plans on retiring after DS "graduates." I would love the opportunity to spend more time with him and the new baby and give them time to bond, but it would also be nice to have a few hours/days to just focus on the little one. I also don't want to completely mess up DS's routine...but luckily they are flexible!

DiFazette · April 2016

I forgot to mention in my post - I don't know how old your DS is, but we moved last summer when DS was 2. We had to pack and sell our old house, move and settle into this one and we're in a different area so I had to find him a new school. I kept him home for 3 weeks amidst the changes. He did NOT transition well. Granted it was into a new school, in a new house, but a new baby is a big change, too. If you can swing it, it might make sense for continuity. We struggled for a month with him not wanting to go back to school. It was a really hard time.

mattanda2011 · April 2016

I work at a school and before I was in administration I had the summers off so our child care was set up to have summers off too. My oldest was 17 months when our second was born at the beginning of June, and I thought of course I always keep her home during the summer so why wouldn't I keep her home while we have a newborn in the house too. After 2 weeks at home with just both of them it became clear that my daughter needed more outside and activities than I could give her. We found a church near by that had a short mother day out she could go to 3 days a week and it was perfect. She was so used to getting outside, playing with other kids, "pre-school activities" that she was craving it and with a newborn nursing all the time I just could not give that to her. This time I will keep both kids in their day care (and really we would have to pay to hold their spot anyways) but I will send them for probably shorter days than if I was working, and may pick random days to keep one or both home with me and the baby. But honestly I know they will be better off getting to play with their friends and staying in their pre school routine than with me nursing a newborn most of the day.

I think if I stayed at home with my kids all the time, and they were used to that normal it would be different, but their normal is playing with a group of 10 other kids everyday, and doing fun special projects that we just dont do at home.

blessdtxas · April 2016

@DiFazette oh gosh! that would be so hard - that is a lot of change at once. I think daycare might be a good constant for him. This baby was a surprise, and while having 2 babies born in December isn't how I would have planned it, it might work out for the best. We are hoping to move in May next year, so that will give everyone some time to adjust before throwing that in the mix.

@mattanda2011 that is so good to know! I didn't even think about paying to hold their spot but that is true. I think you have a good plan. Those first few weeks are just nursing and sleep, so entertaining a toddler will be hard. I know he will miss his nanny too. We'll probably do some type of part time schedule, I'm leaning towards every day for shorter hours vs full days home - just to keep his schedule.

ashcakes921 · April 2016

I have thought about this but my daycare charges regardless of if she's there or not so she will probably go every day. But maybe not for as long. Plus I'm going to personally need transition time from one kid to two lol my DD will be just over 2 by the time this one arrives. Also it will give me alone time with the new baby

sourlemon · April 2016

I'm sending mine to daycare like usual. I don't want to disrupt her routine and also....I don't think I'll have the patience to deal with my 2.5 year old (at the time) and a newborn. Especially not of the new baby is as fussy and troubled as my DD was.

shara3333 · April 2016

My son will be 3.5yo when baby #2 arrives. He will definitely stay in daycare full time. I think he'll need the activity especially in the winter and I'll honestly say I'll need him out to be able to focus on the new little one.

washyourhandsplease · April 2016

When I had Sebastian last year, I kept my toddler in daycare. However, I would pick him up early. Usually around 3 pm. My husband would drop him off around 8 am.

PrettyPalomino · April 2016

I can't relate but my sister has a LO and she plans on keeping her in daycare half the time, only 3 days a week instead of 5, so she can have both together for 2 out of 5 weekdays. But who knows what she will actually do when the time comes!

TheBorg7of9 · April 2016

Send them to daycare or regret it forever.

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