New Here

LCRbelle · April 2016

Hi ladies!
I'm currently going through my third loss and just feel like I need some support from those who understand the hurt I'm going through. I'm saddened that we all have to be in this situation. Miscarriage is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.
I was on this board years ago with my first two losses. My ex and I tried for 2.5 years and suffered two losses during that time. It was more than I could handle and I became very depressed. He did not respond well and that plus his controlling nature ended our relationship.
My new DH and I have been married almost a year and started trying right after getting married. I was so full of hope this time because my doctor told me I have antiphospholipid syndrome and that one baby aspirin a day should keep my blood thinned out enough and prevent miscarriage. I'm going to a hemetology specialist tomorrow and hoping for further insight.
When I told my DH I was mis carrying he started into things like well at least we know it's possible for you to get pregnant which was like a knife in the heart. I have learned from the past and made sure to talk with him about how that's not something helpful to say. He's doing better. If he sees me sad or crying he normally just hugs me and comforts me. Let's me know that he's there if I do need to talk.
Just glancing over this board I already feel so much less alone. Even though I don't know any of y'all, it helps me to know I am not alone. I hope to get to know everyone better and be able to offer support.
I wish so badly I could have my innocence back. A positive pregnancy test is no longer a happy thing but a I wonder how long it will last this time

Sorry for such a long post, just wanted to introduce myself and tell a bit about me.

MWoodside · April 2016

I'm so sorry for your losses.

Spartanrd4 · April 2016

I am sorry for your losses....this has been my only loss, I can't even imagine how you feel after having 3. I know how you feel about your innocence being gone...My next pregnancy I know I will be so scared and anxious. I'm just afraid I won't be happy and feel close to the baby because I'll be so scared of losing it. I felt very alone but being on this board has helped me so much to talk to others who really know what I'm going through.
Good luck at your appointment tomorrow, hope you get further insight on how to move forward ❤

catiecatp · April 2016

I'm sorry for your losses - welcome to the boards

dpjennifer · April 2016

Sorry for your losses.

Kirchetta · April 2016

@LCRbelle
I'm so sorry you have to be back here. Like @Spartanrd4, my loss was my first, and I know that my next pregnancy will not be filled with happiness and excitement, but fear and anxiety. But, it really does help to hang around this board and read about others who have endured the same sadness and have the same fears. It just helps to know I'm not alone.

Hang in there.

MooFish2364 · April 2016

@LCRbelle I'm so sorry for you losses. It's so incredibly unfair. I completely understand about your loss of innocence...I'm excited and also terrified to get pregnant again. I know that I will never be a carefree pregnant women and that makes me sad.

ThePax89 · April 2016

I'm so sorry. I'm also sorry for the lack of support you got in the past. Welcome to this horrible club of amazing women.

LCRbelle · April 2016

Thanks for all of the welcomes. I'm so sorry anyone has to go through these things but I'm so thankful for support and help to not feel so alone! It helps more than I can even express.