First pregnancy and don't know what to expect

ckrysko · March 2016

Hi everyone,
I'm hoping some of you other moms can help shed some light on what to expect and maybe some advice on some issues I'm having. I have read more information than I thought possible but the information sometimes isn't always helpful. I'm 31 weeks and I haven't had the easiest pregnancy with bad stomach pains early on as well as I have preexisting herniated disk that pushes on my sciatic nerve and as my baby is growing is becoming overwhelmingly painful to the point of tears. I've tried talking to my OB and she doesn't seem to care and I can never get ahold of her if something is happening that I'm not sure is something to worry about. I'm tired of going to the hospital cause I can't get ahold of my doctor and I'm in pain and feel things that are new and get no answer just this could be it. I'm so frustrated that I'm at the point I refuse to go if something is up cause it's just too upsetting to go and they make you feel like just some too anxious new mom but I feel like I should go for her sake if I can't get ahold of my doctor but the closer I get I'm more worried I'll be too stubborn to go to the hospital when I am in labour just cause I'm told so much it's nothing the sever pain you have is round ligament pain. I play in a mens hockey league and have taken slaps shots and broken bones that feel less painful. I'm also told most women don't know they lost their plugs and it can be clear or not or bloody or not I don't know what to look for and then I'm told most of the time your water doesn't break. I'm worried I won't know when the time comes just with everything I've experienced and will brush it off until it's too late. Can someone please help me and tell me things to look for. I've had Braxton hicks so the tummy hardening I know and to time them but is there anything else?

proudparent2b · March 2016

First, if you're not happy with your OB, it's not too late to find another one.

Second, you might want to see if your hospital has any birth classes. It sounds like you could really benefit from learning more about the stages of labor.

Third, labor typically lasts for 12-36+ hours for FTMs. The chance you won't be able to figure it out before it's too late is pretty minimal.

dshannah · March 2016

Everything @proudparent2b said, plus this:

1. Definitely find a new OB, if you can! Another poster a few days ago mentioned that practices wouldn't accept her as a new patient so close to her due date, so the sooner you get on that, the better!

2. At our birthing class, the rule we were told for first babies is 5-1-1: Five minutes between contractions (timing from when the contraction starts), each contraction is 1 minute long, and it's been going on for 1 hour. Then you go to the hospital. Not before. Because that pre-labor stage can last for *ages* and if you follow the 5-1-1 rule you are still probably a good 12 hours from delivery.

3. A prenatal yoga class with a good instructor will help you figure out ways to carry the weight with less pain. I highly recommend it! Some of the women in my class were 38-39 weeks in, so it's not to late to start! Just tell the instructor about your back issues: the good instructors know how to work with those injuries.

doozer1345 · March 2016

Have you gotten any books? Google information? Looked for another OB before 31 weeks? And everything @proudparent2b said.

Sienna516 · March 2016

It's not to late to change ob's! I changed to a different one 3 weeks ago bc I found myself disliking my ob more and more. I'm happy so far that i changed

NB817 · March 2016

Yup I agree with what the ladies have said so far...
go get a new OB TODAY! And go find a prenatal yoga class.

Knottie1433777995 · March 2016

I've had some back and joint pain this pregnancy, and started seeing a prenatal chiropractor. It's amazing! I see her at least once a week. I think it sounds like it would help you!

Also, what everyone else has said

auntieembabes · March 2016

Ditto on the OB and the classes.

Though dont count on the 12+ hour labor, mine was 4 hours with my first. I never saw/noticed the mucus plug and my water broke like in the movies. Every labor is different.

Go go into the hospital whenever you feel like something needs attention, screw anyone who thinks you're overreacting- you know your body.

As for the sciatica, have you tried a pregnancy support belt? I'm carrying twins and because of the crowding one sits on my nerve and a belt helps a lot.

kp90 · March 2016

Also a FTM but as PP's have mentioned reasons to go straight to the hospital: the 5-1-1 rule, if your water does break, decrease in fetal movement or heavy bleeding. Other than that if you go in and none of these things have occurred and you're not dilated, they will likely send you home. Also like the other ladies have said, labor can last for hours.. you will definitely know something is up. Just start timing them and when you reach the 5-1-1.. it's time. Good luck. And find a new OB.

laurenmdrn16 · March 2016

From experience, I can say that you are definitely able to get a new OB at this stage in pregnancy. Even if it is just a different doctor in the same practice, it makes a huge difference. With my first pregnancy, my case was mishandled and I didn't feel like I was being listened to, just like you. At 34 wks, the midwives told me I was going to be induced (what?!) so I went to the hospital and then was kicked out at midnight when the OB looked at my labs and callously said "I'm not creating a NICU baby just because she doesn't want to be pregnant anymore!" That was the last straw! I got a new OB the very next day and he actually listened to me and I finally felt well taken care of. You deserve that OP, so please, like PPs have said, get a new OB ASAP!

And definitely look into local new mom's groups either through your hospital or even on FB. While you should always feel comfortable contacting your OB, it is nice to run things by other moms even if all they say is "Call your OB".

KelleAlward · March 2016

I worried about not knowing if I was in labor too, but when it happened I knew. At some point the pain is literally unbearable. the hospital told me I wasn't dilated enough yet and to come back later, I was like f that, I'm not going anywhere since I'm in too much pain to walk, this is happening! I was in labor for over 16 hours after that, so for me there was no rush and labor was obvious. While this is not always the case, it is for a majority.

ckrysko · March 2016

Thanks ladies for all the information it's defiantly helpful and I will be looking into a new OB ASAP

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