Mine is that I really dislike baby showers. The entire concept. I think it's just another way we convince ourselves that we are somehow "special" and worthy of everyone's attention when we're fulfilling a biological need for our species to continue. I get being excited--I'm excited, too--I just think the concept is an unnecessary egocentric construct of our society.
That being said, I did enjoy watching a bunch of frat boys drink beer out of baby bottles at my best friend's shower a few years back.
@skelly70 while I will admit that getting all the stuff at my shower was AMAZING and I'm totally appreciative of it, the whole thing made me really uncomfortable. I have a hard time having people sit around watching me open gift after gift, it felt very AWey. I will not be having a sprinkle for this reason and also because (maybe UO) I think it's too much to ask people to get me yet another gift. With my bridal shower, wedding and first baby, I think that's plenty.
I feel super uncomfortable having a baby shower just a little over a year after I had a bridal shower..... but I'm also super cheap and will gladly take all the gifts people want to give me - especially since most will be from family who would be getting me things whether I had a party or not. Still, it feels really gift grabby to me and I feel guilty about inviting friends.
@skelly70 while I will admit that getting all the stuff at my shower was AMAZING and I'm totally appreciative of it, the whole thing made me really uncomfortable. I have a hard time having people sit around watching me open gift after gift, it felt very AWey. I will not be having a sprinkle for this reason and also because (maybe UO) I think it's too much to ask people to get me yet another gift. With my bridal shower, wedding and first baby, I think that's plenty.
I am 100% in agreement with you on this one. I felt so blessed to receive so many generous gifts with our first child that having a sprinkle seems too much.
I also have a hard time with brides having a wedding shower for their 2nd wedding. It feels really inappropriate.
@skelly70 while I will admit that getting all the stuff at my shower was AMAZING and I'm totally appreciative of it, the whole thing made me really uncomfortable. I have a hard time having people sit around watching me open gift after gift, it felt very AWey. I will not be having a sprinkle for this reason and also because (maybe UO) I think it's too much to ask people to get me yet another gift. With my bridal shower, wedding and first baby, I think that's plenty.
I am 100% in agreement with you on this one. I felt so blessed to receive so many generous gifts with our first child that having a sprinkle seems too much.
I also have a hard time with brides having a wedding shower for their 2nd wedding. It feels really inappropriate.
The argument I've heard about second wedding showers is that a)it could be the groom's first wedding so his family shouldn't be told they shouldn't be excited to celebrate his wife because she's been married before and b) just because it's a second marriage doesn't mean the marriage is any less deserving of celebration. Hell, my aunt was married 3 times (once at 18, once by 25 and then again around 30) but her last marriage was her true love and the one who really made her happy.
Regardin baby showers, I don't mind them but I'm Jewish and we don't celebrate (or really even prep much aside from the essentials) before the baby is here. But don't get me wrong, I loved getting gifts once DS was here! I just didn't have to "ask" people for them lol
I hate people posting about weight gain. Especially when its really a humble brag about how little they've gained. We're supposed to be gaining weight and some gain more than others. My mind is messed up enough, I don't need to be comparing my weight gain to other people's weight gain. Since when has gaining no weight been a badge of honor? (I get that some women have been really sick, and would love to gain weight.)
@texasmama2014 Agreed. I'm not trying to be insensitive to those that have been sick, that is a different circumstance. I remember my first BMB had "weight gain" included on the weekly check-ins and I was always so discouraged by that. I've never been overweight, so seeing the scale increase week over week with me eating substantially the same and exercising is always difficult. I know it is for the baby, but still difficult. And it doesn't help when someone posts they've gained 1 or 2 pounds so far. I just tell myself those people were probably 30 pounds overweight to start with.
@texasmama2014 thank you for saying this. I totally agree. It's hard enough seeing my weight continually go up on the scale and hearing that others haven't even gained or gained minor amounts is really tough for me. All of our bodies are different and comparing weight gain is truly useless.
@texasmomma2014 I totally agree with you. I go out of my way not to know how much weight I am gaining. I stand backward on the scale and rely on my nurse to say I am fine or not fine but no mention of numbers. It is not important unless there is a problem.
@Katienu That is a good idea. I dread getting myself weighed at the doctor because it is always more than my home scale. I weigh myself once every few weeks (and always in my underwear) at home to make sure it isn't anything excessive, but other than that I have NO desire to know.
@LWC1112 I fight negative thoughts constantly about weight gain and showing sooner, etc. I weigh myself at home every few days. Always after pooping, and always totally naked!!!
@LWC1112 I fight negative thoughts constantly about weight gain and showing sooner, etc. I weigh myself at home every few days. Always after pooping, and always totally naked!!!
Uh, i'm stuck in the box!
And I always weigh myself at the same time in the morning, sometimes both before and after I can poop -- if i'm not constipated. lol. I actually now need to weigh myself daily, because if I gain more than 2lbs within a day, I need to call my doctor and they need to monitor for TTTS (twin to twin transfusion syndrome). Prior to pregnancy I tracked my food, exercise daily, now that I'm having twins I said screw it. I'm always eating and know I need to gain the weight for the babies.
@LWC1112 I fight negative thoughts constantly about weight gain and showing sooner, etc. I weigh myself at home every few days. Always after pooping, and always totally naked!!!
I feel like I've gained a good amount of weight but I'm barely showing. I can still fit into my regular jeans (not that I should and it's super uncomfortable, but I can if I need to!). I weigh myself every morning butt ass naked. I trust that number way more than the number on the doctor's office scale!
@skelly70 I am with you on that. I am not a big fan of showers for weddings or babies, because they just aren't very fun for the guests. On the one hand I hate the silly games, but on the other hand, how else do you pass the time with a group of women who usually don't know each other (they only know the host)? I skipped out on having a wedding shower, but I am having a small baby shower. But I really didn't want a big one because I just got married last year and received generous gifts from lots of loved ones, and it just seems so gift-grabby to do it again so soon! My cousins are throwing me this shower and it will be all family, so that makes me feel better about it. Less gift-grabby when it's family who would all send gifts anyway. And it will be more fun because we all know each other and it's not a group of semi strangers.
@texasmama2014 I really want to gain weight, so those posts make me angry too! I told my friends that my doctor seemed concerned I haven't gained and only lost, and I got some kind of mean comments. They were along the lines of I am chunky enough I didn't need to gain weight... since when am I supposed to not gain a little weight while pregnant.
I hate people posting about weight gain. Especially when its really a humble brag about how little they've gained. We're supposed to be gaining weight and some gain more than others. My mind is messed up enough, I don't need to be comparing my weight gain to other people's weight gain. Since when has gaining no weight been a badge of honor? (I get that some women have been really sick, and would love to gain weight.)
Considering I'm as big as a house and at my last hair appointment the ladies thought I was close to delivery time ... I hate discussing all things weight. My thoughts: Can we just be excited for healthy babies and talk about something fun like nurseries?
@LadyBear10 My weight has yo-yo ed this whole pregnancy, so gaining "the right amount" has sometimes meant I need to gain BACK weight I gained already. Super frustrating.
My UO - I am SO glad I switched doctors. Changing doctors mid pregnancy met with some resistance from my family, and to some degree the doctors themselves (both kept asking me why), but I am much more comfortable with the new practice as a whole. I'm glad I did what was right for me and baby, regardless of what the people around me thought.
I totally side eye anyone who gives a male name to a female and automatically think that they were disappointed to have a girl so gave it a boys name.
Also, I don't let drs tell me my weight during my pregnancy. They are only allowed to tell me if I am losing (not an amount) or if I am gaining to quick. I gained less that the minimum 10 lbs last time due to health issues and it stressed me out knowing I wasn't gaining (and yes I had a low birth weight preemie so not gaining is NOT something to brag about). This time I have gained "right on track" according to my dr but I won't let them tell me an amount or my weight. I don't need to stress about this.
@Alygohome our top choice for a girl is traditionally a "boy" name. We wouldn't use it for a boy though. I have a slight preference towards having another girl. We just think its cute.
@Alygohome our top choice for a girl is traditionally a "boy" name. We wouldn't use it for a boy though. I have a slight preference towards having another girl. We just think its cute.
Yeah, I don't think boys names are cute, at all on girls. No matter what.
@Alygohome our top choice for a girl is traditionally a "boy" name. We wouldn't use it for a boy though. I have a slight preference towards having another girl. We just think its cute.
Yeah, I don't think boys names are cute, at all on girls. No matter what.
What about names that were originally boys names but have become girls names over the years? Like Leslie. It was originally a boy name (think Leslie Neilsen from the Naked Gun films)
@Alygohome our top choice for a girl is traditionally a "boy" name. We wouldn't use it for a boy though. I have a slight preference towards having another girl. We just think its cute.
Yeah, I don't think boys names are cute, at all on girls. No matter what.
I appreciated the baby showers with DS1 from a strictly financial perspective. It was nice to have the help. But I dislike baby shower games and I get uncomfortable opening gifts in front of others and I despise most cutesy baby clothes. One of the best things about having another boy is that we have almost everything we need and there's no excuse for a "sprinkle for girly stuff" even.
I totally side eye anyone who gives a male name to a female and automatically think that they were disappointed to have a girl so gave it a boys name.
I have a boys name. I like it. If I were a boy it would have been totally different. To each their own.
My UO is.. I really love having my kids home from school, but dang, they have a lot of days off. I really wouldn't mind, but I have heard numerous teacher and administrators complain about never "getting a break from the kids". Holy hell, there is a half day or a full day off every other week!
Edited because I some how quoted PP twice. Edited again because I forgot my whole purpose for quoting in the first place. I need sleep.
@Alygohome our top choice for a girl is traditionally a "boy" name. We wouldn't use it for a boy though. I have a slight preference towards having another girl. We just think its cute.
Yeah, I don't think boys names are cute, at all on girls. No matter what. For God's sakes. Roll your eyes or whatever the hell u do, at something that matters. Grow up.
I totally get being uncomfortable getting a shower! Everyone around me says this is my first and I should have a baby shower but DH and I just got married last May so it's only been a year since I had my bridal shower. I feel so bad like I'm burdening those around me, feeling pressured to throw me these showers. I know it's all in my head but for that reason, I'd rather just not have one.
I'm also having a baby after getting married last year, but you know what? I don't mind having my shower! Almost everyone invited who is not family has kids. Most of my friends started with the kid thing between 5 and 10 years ago. As a broke college student, I bought them all wedding gifts, shower gifts (both wedding and baby) and included their kids in major holidays where we, as friends, exchanged gifts by adding a little something extra for the kiddo. Seven of my friends all had babies in one year four years ago... and I went to seven baby showers! And traveled in from out of state to do so, since I was just starting my MBA. Now their kids are all school age, we're all much all more financially stable since we're older, and at 31, finally... it's my turn.
I admit, I did make sure to put a lot of lower cost items on my list because I remember being frustrated at not being able to afford anything off the list (since you know, I had seven to account for, and was in grad school full time.) I even put things on there which cost $3.00 and won't buy for myself because as cute as the apple themed stroller blanket clip is... it's definitely not in the must haves... But I would be thrilled if someone got it for me!
I'm also having a baby after getting married last year, but you know what? I don't mind having my shower! Almost everyone invited who is not family has kids. Most of my friends started with the kid thing between 5 and 10 years ago. As a broke college student, I bought them all wedding gifts, shower gifts (both wedding and baby) and included their kids in major holidays where we, as friends, exchanged gifts by adding a little something extra for the kiddo. Seven of my friends all had babies in one year four years ago... and I went to seven baby showers! And traveled in from out of state to do so, since I was just starting my MBA. Now their kids are all school age, we're all much all more financially stable since we're older, and at 31, finally... it's my turn.
I admit, I did make sure to put a lot of lower cost items on my list because I remember being frustrated at not being able to afford anything off the list (since you know, I had seven to account for, and was in grad school full time.) I even put things on there which cost $3.00 and won't buy for myself because as cute as the apple themed stroller blanket clip is... it's definitely not in the must haves... But I would be thrilled if someone got it for me!
Exactly this. I'm in the same boat with friends and family I am one of the last ones and I've even planned a couple of them!
I may feel differently if I were one of the last ones from my group of friends. I'm exactly the opposite--one of the first! I'm sure this mentality will change over time because I want to look forward to my baby shower and not cloud it with feelings of guilt and burden.
Re: UO Thursday
That being said, I did enjoy watching a bunch of frat boys drink beer out of baby bottles at my best friend's shower a few years back.
I am 100% in agreement with you on this one. I felt so blessed to receive so many generous gifts with our first child that having a sprinkle seems too much.
I also have a hard time with brides having a wedding shower for their 2nd wedding. It feels really inappropriate.
Regardin baby showers, I don't mind them but I'm Jewish and we don't celebrate (or really even prep much aside from the essentials) before the baby is here. But don't get me wrong, I loved getting gifts once DS was here! I just didn't have to "ask" people for them lol
@LadyBear10 My weight has yo-yo ed this whole pregnancy, so gaining "the right amount" has sometimes meant I need to gain BACK weight I gained already. Super frustrating.
My UO - I am SO glad I switched doctors. Changing doctors mid pregnancy met with some resistance from my family, and to some degree the doctors themselves (both kept asking me why), but I am much more comfortable with the new practice as a whole. I'm glad I did what was right for me and baby, regardless of what the people around me thought.
I totally side eye anyone who gives a male name to a female and automatically think that they were disappointed to have a girl so gave it a boys name.
Also, I don't let drs tell me my weight during my pregnancy. They are only allowed to tell me if I am losing (not an amount) or if I am gaining to quick. I gained less that the minimum 10 lbs last time due to health issues and it stressed me out knowing I wasn't gaining (and yes I had a low birth weight preemie so not gaining is NOT something to brag about). This time I have gained "right on track" according to my dr but I won't let them tell me an amount or my weight. I don't need to stress about this.
Yeah, I don't think boys names are cute, at all on girls. No matter what.
BFP #2 8/22/12 | EDD 5/5/13 | DS1 born 5/9/13
BFP #3 4/25/15 | EDD 1/7/16 | MMC 7/2/15 @ 13w1d | D&E 7/8/15
BFP #4 12/9/15 | EDD 8/22/16 | DS2 born 5/18/16 at 26w2d
Just keep swimming.
My UO is.. I really love having my kids home from school, but dang, they have a lot of days off. I really wouldn't mind, but I have heard numerous teacher and administrators complain about never "getting a break from the kids". Holy hell, there is a half day or a full day off every other week!
Edited because I some how quoted PP twice.
Edited again because I forgot my whole purpose for quoting in the first place. I need sleep.
I admit, I did make sure to put a lot of lower cost items on my list because I remember being frustrated at not being able to afford anything off the list (since you know, I had seven to account for, and was in grad school full time.) I even put things on there which cost $3.00 and won't buy for myself because as cute as the apple themed stroller blanket clip is... it's definitely not in the must haves... But I would be thrilled if someone got it for me!