IF: New to the board :)

Re: IF: New to the board :)

• vssbrm member

  March 2016

  @SunShineWoman I have not had this problem specifically, but I did find that when we were first beginning to seriously try (we are now on to IVF), it was a lot easier on my husband if I did not tell him where I was at in my cycle, and I would try to make it fun for him, i.e. He really likes massages, I would butter him up with a good one. Not only is infertility stressful but so is his job. I found doing little things like that took a lot of the stress off and we were both able to enjoy it more. Good luck to you, hopefully you are not here long.

  Married May 2009, TTC since November 2012 (Together since 2006 ish - had my eyes on him since 2001)

  Me: 32 (33 in May), Him: 37 (January)
  

  
  

  DX: Me: High Prolactin, Possible Autoimmune Disease Issues, though RE not concerned (?)  New RE has a plan!!

         Him: Minor Varicocele, low morphology, slightly low count

  
  

  History:
  
  Beta 5/9/2016 BFP!!
  Embryo transfer scheduled for April 28, 2016 and beta test May 9, 2016 (day after Mother's Day!)
  Transfer Meds include: Lupron Depot (4/1), Minivelle Patch (every 3rd day), Estradiol (3x daily), Amoxicillin, Progesterone in Oil, Methylprednisonlone. Lovenox and baby asprin added after transfer. 
  
  3/22/16 - Sono Saline ultrasound cyst to be aspirated on 4/1/16 if not cleared up by 3/29 US - It cleared on its own
  Retrieval 3/4/16 - 26 eggs retrieved, 23 mature, 20 fertilized, 14 embryos currently frozen
  Starting IVF Stims on +/- Feb 22, 2016
  HSG scheduled for 1-26-16 - All clear "beautiful uterus" (though inverted)
  
  Switched clinics and now prepping for IVF in February / March
  
  

  Fourth IUI -  CD3-7 100 Clomid w/ Ovidrel Trigger - December, 2015 - BFN
  

  Third IUI -  CD3-7 100 Clomid w/ Ovidrel Trigger - November, 2015 - BFN

  Second IUI - CD3-7 100 Clomid w/ Ovidrel Trigger - September, 2015 - BFN

  Started Prolactin Medication October 15 - Levels quickly regulated to with in normal range

  First IUI - CD3-7 100 Clomid w/ Ovidrel Trigger - August, 2015 - BFN

  After no BFPs (ever) First RE/Urologist visit in Feb 2015
  

  HSG w/ OB, 2014 = all clear
  Trying to conceive since November 2012

  Report1 Reply
• Loading the player...
• wifeinraleigh28 member

  March 2016

  Welcome @SunShineWoman.  It is not uncommon for men to struggle when there is pressure during the fertile week, especially if you've been trying for awhile.  IF and TTC can make sex such a chore and takes the fun out of it.  Like @vssbrm said, sometimes not telling your DH where you're at in your cycle can help.  Honestly, I would just talk to your DH about what he thinks would help him the most with this, since he probably knows himself the best.  Before we started treatments, my DH struggled with the FW and we had a conversation about it and he said it would work best for him if I let him initiate sex during my fertile week, so that he could be in charge of when he felt most into it.  Good luck to you.

  ***BFP & Child Warning***
  
  Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
  IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
  IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
  FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
  FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
  FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20

  Report0 Reply
• SunShineWoman member

  March 2016

  Thanks guys! I actually don't tell him. It's literally something that is just sprung up recently.... I am just at my wits end. 

  Report0 Reply
• maggiemitchell0607 member

  March 2016

  Hi @SunShineWoman - I am a new member to this site as well and wanted to post since I dealt with this issue this month with my DH too.  Thank you for bringing it up!  
  
  We have been TTC for a year and this is our first month of fertility treatment.  Like you, I feel bad talking about this issue with people and with him!  We were (eventually after some failed attempts) able to BD on the days after our trigger shot like the Dr. told us too but it was super stressful for DH and I felt so bad for him!  He kept saying "you have had to get a wand up yourself and blood drawn every other day and stick needles in your stomach every day and I can't even do my part!"  
  
  I am hoping this gets easier for us after this first month.  
  
  Me:  33  DH:  38
  Married: 2014
  TTC since March 2015
  Endometrioma in Left Ovary
  Ovulation Dysfunction 
  
  

  Report2 Reply
• BecauseLove member

  March 2016

  SunShineWoman Welcome back! I am sorry you are dealing with something that is so difficult to talk about and to tackle. I haven't had that issue with my husband...but I remember dating a guy that had a hard time with this sorta thing and I remember it totally messed with my head. Is there anything that you notice that is different from the times he achieves completion and the times he doesn't? Is there anything you can do to break out of BD norm and hopefully help him leave the issues behind? But to be honest this isn't on you....sometimes it is just harder and I am sorry it is such an obstacle right now for your situation because otherwise I would just say give it time or let it go. Hugs...as I  know it is frustrating and emotional! Ps. I am impressed by your 3 times in 1 day (those days are long gone for me and my dear hubby). Gosh that makes me tired just thinking about.  

  Me: 37 DH: 32 TTGP Since 2014 INFERTILITY INFO (Medicated, IUI's, IVF/FET) IN SPOILER

  October 2014-April 2015: Without Medication or Doctor Guidance No Periods/No O BFN 
  Medicated April-December 2015: Clomid (didn't work) and so we tried Femera/Letrozole. Progesterone Met 1000 Not diagnosed PCOS but treating the same. Anovulatory. TI No US No O BFN 
  
  - TW - 
  IUI"S 
  January 2016-October 2016: Letrozole 2.5mg-7.5 mg, Pregyl or Ovideral Trigger Shot.
  9 cycles of IUI (7 Cancelled due to no mature follicles) (2 attempted IUI's with mature follicles)  
  
  IUI # 2 June 2016 and July 2016:  Met 1000, Estrogen (21 days), Progesterone (5 days) Femera 5m 6/28/16 Ultrasound CD14 = 25 follie. Pregnyl Trigger CD14 IUI 7/13 1stBeta (DPO 15): 7.6 (Surprise BFP...but Low #'s) 2ndBeta (DPO 17): 18 3rdBeta (DPO 19) 52.8 Progesterone Prescribed (spotting) 4thBeta (DPO 26) 6.9 Chemical Pregnancy BFN
  
  IVF and FET (diagnosed with PCOS) 204 pounds at start of IVF
  IVF # 1 October and November 2016: CCRM - Minneapolis 10/14 Consult and CD 3 testing, 10/14 started (OCP Antagonist - BCP) BCP, 10/21 1 day work up, Doxycycline 100mg 10 days, 10/24 stop bcp, Bloodwork US 10/29, 10/30-11/8 Stims 2 vials of Menopur, Dexamethasone, 225 of Gonal-F daily (dropped to 120). CCRM Vitamin Cocktail (like 20 of them), Monitoring (11/2, 11/4, 11/5, 11/6, 11/7, 11/8), Retrieval 11/10 (38 eggs, 30 mature, 16 fertilized ICSI), 11/16 8 Blasts 11/30 CCS testing results 3 Normal 5aa's (2 boys and 1 girl) 1 Unknown 4 Abnormal (All girls) 
  
  
  Fet #1 January 2017: CCRM - Minneapolis bcp/lupron/suppository/p4 in oil QOD AF 12/7, 12/8 start meds. 1/3 lining and blood work check 14/15 mm, BW check 1/6. 1/9 transfer with acupuncture 1 CCS/PGS Normal 5aa hatching Progesterone around 26ish? Lower estrogen level 207 (wanted above 300 but over 200 was acceptable), started 1 estrace, progesterone in oil every other day, vivelle dot patches 4 every other day, 3x estrodiol daily, vitamin cocktail. POAS: - 4dp5dt and 5dp5dt, 6dp5dt frer very very very faint line. 7dp5dt and 8dp5dt + on Accuclear. 8dp5dt pregnant on a clear blue easy digital. 214 pounds at FET
  1/18 #1 Beta 91.1
  1/20 #2 Beta 215.9
  2/3 6 week US 2 sacs? Twins? but only 1 heartbeat/pole good heartbeat Stopped taking baby asprin Added in DHEA Veg Vitamin (also got the report that they transferred a girl 5aa eggo) 
  2/10 7 week US 2 sacs (likely vanishing twin) only 1 heartbeat/pole etc good heartbeat 137
  2/24 9 week US 1 eggo sac good heart beat 182 1 very small fluid sac (shrinking) 
  2/24 9 week 2 days start weening. Graduated from RE (CCRM is now starting weening as soon as 8.5 weeks)
  3/7 10 Weeks 5 days  weened completely of FET meds A1C 5.3% (Normal)
  3/9 11 Weeks 1 day my progesterone level was 15 and my estrogen level was 881 (I freaked out!)
  3/16 12 Weeks 1 day baby heard on doppler 164 HB
  4/14 16 week 2 days Ultrasound baby is looking good with all good numbers sized 17 weeks. Also got to hear her on the doppler for a few mins too. 
  
  5/5 19 Weeks 2 days going in for "20" week anatomy ultrasound got measurements but need to come back as wasn't able to get all the measurements
  MEASUREMENTS BPD 4.6 cm 19 weeks 6 days* (78%) HC 17.0 cm 19 weeks 4 days* (70%) AC 14.5 cm 19 weeks 4 days* (69%) Femur 3.1 cm 19 weeks 6 days* (63%) Humerus 3.1 cm 20 weeks 2 days (84%) Cerebellum 2.0 cm 19 weeks 5 days
  CisternaMagna 6.2 mm Nuchal Fold 4.5 mm
  HC/AC 1.17 FL/AC 0.22 FL/BPD 0.68 EFW (Ac/Fl/Hc) 309 grams - 0 lbs 11 oz
  THE AVERAGE GESTATIONAL AGE is 19 weeks 5 days +/- 10 days.
  
  6/9 24 Weeks 2 days Glucose Test 1 hour (Failed) 190
  6/16 25 Weeks 2 days Ultrasound and 1st Baby Shower 
  6/20 25 Weeks 6 days Glucose Test 3 Hours (Failed) 95 (95), 183 (180), 213 (155), 198 (140) etc
  6/21 26 Weeks Recommended to a perintologist
  6/22 26 Weeks 1 day start monitoring blood sugar levels 
  6/30 27 Weeks 2 day A1 (blood sugar test ordered)
  
  7/5 28 Weeks Echo and 3d Ultrasound
  AMNIOTIC FLUID Q1: 2.6 Q2: 3.2 Q3: 4.8 Q4: 5.6 AFI Total = 16.3 cm Amniotic Fluid: Normal 
  MEASUREMENTS BPD 7.2 cm 28 weeks 5 days* (60%) HC 26.4 cm 28 weeks 4 days* (48%) AC 23.3 cm 27 weeks 4 days* (36%) Femur 5.2 cm 28 weeks 0 days* (36%) Humerus 4.8 cm 28 weeks 0 days (49%)
  HC/AC 1.13 FL/AC 0.23 FL/BPD 0.73 Ceph Index 0.77 EFW (Ac/Fl/Hc) 1142 grams - 2 lbs 8 oz (37%)
  THE AVERAGE GESTATIONAL AGE is 28 weeks 1 day +/- 14 days.
  
  7/10 28 Weeks 5 days Dietitian Appt and Lactatcian Consultant and A1 blood draw 5.4% (normal) 218.5 pounds
  7/20 30 Weeks GD consult. 6 Lantus at 7pm daily. Novolog 1 unit for every 15 gm carbohydrate if consumed more than 30 gm at brkfst or 60 gm at lunch or supper 215.6 pounds
  7/20 30 Weeks Transferred care to OB due to high risk. 216 pounds
  
  8/2 32 Weeks Ultrasound (not cooperative and still breech) and then weekly NST's
  MEASUREMENTS BPD 8.0 cm 32 weeks 2 days* (44%) HC 29.2 cm 31 weeks 6 days* (22%) AC 26.9 cm 31 weeks 0 days* (24%)  Femur 6.3 cm 32 weeks 2 days* (57%) Humerus 5.7 cm 32 weeks 6 days (71%)
  HC/AC 1.08 FL/AC 0.23 FL/BPD 0.78 Ceph Index 0.78 EFW (Ac/Fl/Hc) 1808 grams - 3 lbs 15 oz (29%)
  THE AVERAGE GESTATIONAL AGE is 31 weeks 6 days +/- 18 days.
  AMNIOTIC FLUID Q1: 3.4 Q2: 2.9 Q3: 2.9 Q4: 4.4 AFI Total = 13.6 cm Amniotic Fluid: Normal
  
  8/8 32w6d upped to 1:10 for dinner 
  8/11 Baby Shower
  8/13 Baby Shower
  8/16 34 weeks NST good reading Upped to 8 at bed for fasting and 1:7 for dinner 
  8/18 Dr Appt
  
  8/24 35 weeks 1 day (was suppose to be scheduled for 36 weeks) Weeks Ultrasound/GD Dr Appt/OB Appt 
  Frank Breech
  MEASUREMENTS BPD 8.9 cm 35 weeks 6 days* (67%) HC 31.7 cm 35 weeks 1 day * (35%) AC 30.2 cm 34 weeks 2 days* (33%) Femur 6.9 cm 34 weeks 6 days* (57%) Humerus 6.0 cm 34 weeks 6 days (64%)
  HC/AC 1.05 FL/AC 0.23 FL/BPD 0.78 Ceph Index 0.80 EFW (Ac/Fl/Hc) 2494 grams - 5 lbs 8 oz (39%)
  THE AVERAGE GESTATIONAL AGE is 35 weeks 1 day +/- 21 days.
  AMNIOTIC FLUID Q1: 3.3 Q2: 3.8 Q3: 2.4 Q4: 3.8 AFI Total = 13.4 cm Amniotic Fluid: Normal
  
  8/31 36 Weeks
  9/7 37 Weeks
  9/10 Water broke...I got it tested at the emergency room it it showed it was negative. More water breaking and didn't go to the dr.
  9/11 37 weeks 4 days Called the Dr and got retested for water breaking...
  10:30pmish Baby Girl Born via Emergency C Section (Frank Breech Baby) 6lbs 3oz  -
  9/13 Dropped to 5 pounds 10oz and had jaundice 
  9/13 38 weeks
  
  9/22 39 Weeks 2 days C Section Scheduled for 10am (arrive at 8am) Equinox/Solstice
  EDD 9/27

  Report0 Reply
• bbkidz member

  March 2016 edited March 2016

  Have you tried increased foreplay or changing positions to help him? Prayers for you!

  Me:  29  DH:  32
  Together since January 23, 2013
  Married March 22, 2014
  TTC #1 since August 2015
  First RE meeting February 2, 2016; tests normal for both of us
  Clomid round #4 of 150 mg followed by
  First Ovidrel trigger shot February 10, 2016
  First IUI February 12, 2016 Negative
  Started Letrozole 5mg round #1 February 23
  Began additional Letrozole 5mg + Dexamethasone 1 mg March 8
  Ovidrel trigger shot March 16
  IUI #2 March 18 with progesterone suppositories beginning March 19
  Positive HPT April 2 Praise God!!!
  Estimated Due Date: December 8
  
  <a href="http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Parenting Advice"><img 
  
  Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see. Hebrews 11:1
  

  Report0 Reply