Scared to get pregnant again?

mrscammack · March 2016

My DD will be 7 weeks on Monday. I just had my 6 week post natal appointment this past Friday and was given the all clear for sex, and surprisingly I'm actually feeling up for it. The only problem is I'm terrified of getting pregnant again. DH and I are pretty sure we want to be "one and done" but even if we decide to have another baby we both agreed we want to wait at least 2-3 years before we'd be ready to do this again. I think part of the reason I'm so scared is I got pregnant with DD while on the pill so I don't really trust my contraceptives. Luckily around the time we conceived DD we were discussing coming off the pill to start trying for a baby within the year anyway so the timing of it all worked out really well. My OB perscribed me a new brand of bcp she hopes will work better for me, but if it doesn't the idea of having another baby terrifies me right now!

Is anyone else scared of getting pregnant again? What are you ladies planning on using (if anything) to prevent back to back pregnancies?

srecupido · March 2016

We are in the same boat as far as thinking one and done

I'm not ready to make that a permanent decision quite yet though! My Ob put me on the depo shot. Apparently it's very effective and I like that I don't have to worry about missing it like the pill.

middy411 · March 2016

I also was contemplating getting the shot. I'm only 3 weeks PP from a c section so I still have some time to think about it. I was on the nuva ring before pregnancy but I feel like I didn't always feel that great while on it. I really don't want to be pumping my body full of hormones all the time between pregnancies, but the copper IUD scares me too! I have really heavy periods normally so I don't need to deal with the cramping and extra heavy side effects of that. Just can't win. But right now I think I'm leaning towards the shot until I get a chance to talk with my OB about the best option for me. I do want more kids but right now I can't fathom ever wanting to be pregnant again. I'm sure baby fever will kick back in when LO is a walking/talking toddler and my little baby is gone haha

VitaLuna · March 2016

We're done after this, but I don't want to do anything permanent for a year or so. I'm planning on an IUD, but I will always be worried about pregnancy until something permanent is done. I definitely don't want an oops!

ashton2190 · March 2016

We want to have another baby but not for a few years. We literally couldn't afford it because we're trying to buy a house so we're scrimping as much as we can. I didn't get pregnant on the pill but I'm now on the mini pill and it seems so likely for something to go wrong so I'm really worried. My OBGYN highly recommended the iud but DH and I didn't want to do that for a few reasons

robinj716 · March 2016

So glad you posted this! I got pregnant while on the pill as well, so I'm very terrified of getting pregnant again. My SO says he's "one and done" but I'm not ready to decide that yet. I had my PP appt. and my OB recommended the implant in your arm. It sounded good at the time, but after reading more about it, I don't want to get that. I've also been reading about IUD's and have read a lot of negative things about that too. I think no matter what BC I use, I'm going to be afraid of another "oops!" I have to go back in a week to set up my BC and I'm thining I'm going to tell my doctor to put me on a pill. I've just read too many horror stories about IUD's and the arm implant.

PaniaO · March 2016

Oh gosh, my sympathies! I'm for sure nervous about risking pregnancy again. Feeling very one and done. But I wasn't on bc before, so I'm still naively trusting it. I'm so sorry you've lost that sense of security. No advice, though--just well wishes!

mrscammack · March 2016

robinj716 said:

So glad you posted this! I got pregnant while on the pill as well, so I'm very terrified of getting pregnant again. My SO says he's "one and done" but I'm not ready to decide that yet. I had my PP appt. and my OB recommended the implant in your arm. It sounded good at the time, but after reading more about it, I don't want to get that. I've also been reading about IUD's and have read a lot of negative things about that too. I think no matter what BC I use, I'm going to be afraid of another "oops!" I have to go back in a week to set up my BC and I'm thining I'm going to tell my doctor to put me on a pill. I've just read too many horror stories about IUD's and the arm implant.

It's nice to know I'm not the only one whose having this experience! My doctor has me on seasonique bcp which is a different brand and also is 3 months of pills in a row so you only have a period 4 times a year. She said it should be better at suppressing ovulation but it still worries me. Like you I'm hesitant about an iud or the implant so I'm going to try the new pills for now and hope for the best! Once we decide for sure we're one and done I'm going to ask DH to get a vasectomy but right now we don't want to do anything so drastic.

dtaded13 · March 2016

I'm in the worried club. Although we're just doing condoms for birth control. Extra hormones don't mix well with me. But, prior to conceiving DS I wasn't on any form of birth control for 4 years! We struggled with secondary infertility. DD was conceived in only 2 months of trying. So, while it took 4 years for this baby I'm still worried I could conceive easily. We thought we'd just want these two but now that DS is here we're both feeling like maybe we want 3 but not right now. We still haven't DTD because I'm emotionally not ready, and I think part of that is the fear of getting pregnant

ashton2190 · March 2016

mrscammack said:

robinj716 said:

So glad you posted this! I got pregnant while on the pill as well, so I'm very terrified of getting pregnant again. My SO says he's "one and done" but I'm not ready to decide that yet. I had my PP appt. and my OB recommended the implant in your arm. It sounded good at the time, but after reading more about it, I don't want to get that. I've also been reading about IUD's and have read a lot of negative things about that too. I think no matter what BC I use, I'm going to be afraid of another "oops!" I have to go back in a week to set up my BC and I'm thining I'm going to tell my doctor to put me on a pill. I've just read too many horror stories about IUD's and the arm implant.

It's nice to know I'm not the only one whose having this experience! My doctor has me on seasonique bcp which is a different brand and also is 3 months of pills in a row so you only have a period 4 times a year. She said it should be better at suppressing ovulation but it still worries me. Like you I'm hesitant about an iud or the implant so I'm going to try the new pills for now and hope for the best! Once we decide for sure we're one and done I'm going to ask DH to get a vasectomy but right now we don't want to do anything so drastic.

I know everyone is different, but I was on seasonique for 5.5 years and I loved it. Having only 4 periods a year was great and I didn't feel any side effects. DH thinks my sex drive went way down l, but honestly I'm not that into it even when I'm not on the pill. I would love to go back to it when I'm not breastfeeding anymore. And I didn't have any issues getting pregnant after stopping it, I had one period and then I got pregnant (again, results my not be typical

)

chilady12 · March 2016

I'm in this club as well! I used to take orthotricyclen lo which I really liked and was on for years. Now that I'm nursing though, I'm starting the mini pill. DH and I don't want to try for another baby for a few years so I think I'll stay on the mini pill and we'll use condoms to be safe (I'm afraid of it not being as effective as normal bc). Once I'm done breastfeeding I'll go back to my old bc pill and will feel better about not using a secondary form of protection.

meg+on+the+DL · March 2016

Ok... just a quick question... why are some of you avoiding bc while you are breastfeeding? I hadn't heard of any side effects. I'm planning on an IUD because I am awful about taking the pill. And I've tried the patch and NuvaRing and hated it.

I can't imagine getting pregnant right away. Ugh... Morning sickness with a newborn!! I shutter at the thought!

middy411 · March 2016

meg+on+the+DL said:

Ok... just a quick question... why are some of you avoiding bc while you are breastfeeding? I hadn't heard of any side effects. I'm planning on an IUD because I am awful about taking the pill. And I've tried the patch and NuvaRing and hated it.

I can't imagine getting pregnant right away. Ugh... Morning sickness with a newborn!! I shutter at the thought!

According to my doc, you can't take any bc containing estrogen because it will cause your milk to dry up. So only certain kinds of birth control are plausible.

mrscammack · March 2016

ashton2190 said:

mrscammack said:

robinj716 said:

So glad you posted this! I got pregnant while on the pill as well, so I'm very terrified of getting pregnant again. My SO says he's "one and done" but I'm not ready to decide that yet. I had my PP appt. and my OB recommended the implant in your arm. It sounded good at the time, but after reading more about it, I don't want to get that. I've also been reading about IUD's and have read a lot of negative things about that too. I think no matter what BC I use, I'm going to be afraid of another "oops!" I have to go back in a week to set up my BC and I'm thining I'm going to tell my doctor to put me on a pill. I've just read too many horror stories about IUD's and the arm implant.

It's nice to know I'm not the only one whose having this experience! My doctor has me on seasonique bcp which is a different brand and also is 3 months of pills in a row so you only have a period 4 times a year. She said it should be better at suppressing ovulation but it still worries me. Like you I'm hesitant about an iud or the implant so I'm going to try the new pills for now and hope for the best! Once we decide for sure we're one and done I'm going to ask DH to get a vasectomy but right now we don't want to do anything so drastic.

I know everyone is different, but I was on seasonique for 5.5 years and I loved it. Having only 4 periods a year was great and I didn't feel any side effects. DH thinks my sex drive went way down l, but honestly I'm not that into it even when I'm not on the pill. I would love to go back to it when I'm not breastfeeding anymore. And I didn't have any issues getting pregnant after stopping it, I had one period and then I got pregnant (again, results my not be typical )

That's great to hear! I just started my first pack yesterday morning so I'm hoping I don't have any adverse reactions, 4 periods a year sounds like a dream since I suffer from endometriosis and have such pain during my cycle. It's nice to hear you did so well on it I'm hoping it's a good solution for me as well!

mwmiller4 · March 2016

@meg+on+the+DL I'm planning on going on Mirena after 6 weeks. I have a good friend (who is also a midwife) who is on it while breast feeding (almost a year now) and was on it before she got pregnant (and got pregnant on her first cycle off--not that it guarantees anything).

Right now, I'm actually more open to having another baby than I thought I would be. I had a miscarriage before DD and was just thrilled to be pregnant this time and felt lucky just to have her. My husband really wants 2 kids because we both have siblings (and I loved growing up with my brother, so I see his point). As some of the hormones fade, I'm starting to be less terrified about another loss but want to wait at least a year before we try.

mrscammack · March 2016

Another thing I forgot to mention was my OB recommended waiting 2 years before trying to get pregnant again, has anyone else had this advice? I didn't have a csection or any complications with pregnancy or birth so I found it strange - not that I want to have another before that but I found it weird.

chilady12 · March 2016

mrscammack said:

Another thing I forgot to mention was my OB recommended waiting 2 years before trying to get pregnant again, has anyone else had this advice? I didn't have a csection or any complications with pregnancy or birth so I found it strange - not that I want to have another before that but I found it weird.

I have heard that it's best to wait at least 18-24 months between pregnancies to give your body a chance to fully recover but I'm not sure if that's a hard and fast rule.

VitaLuna · March 2016

mrscammack said:

Another thing I forgot to mention was my OB recommended waiting 2 years before trying to get pregnant again, has anyone else had this advice? I didn't have a csection or any complications with pregnancy or birth so I found it strange - not that I want to have another before that but I found it weird.

I was told to try to wait 2 years between deliveries (so, don't start trying until LO is 15+ mos) so your body has a chance to recover. They recommended that for all deliveries, but pushed it in particular for prior c-sections. That was fine with me.. I didn't feel ready until DD1 was almost a year and a half.

g8trkim · March 2016

I'm worried but only because we have 3 and I'm done. H is still on the fence about another. I'm getting Mirena again which I had last time. I got pregnant less than a month after removing it! If you're worried, maybe double up on the contraception (IUD or pill PLUS condoms).

mrscammack · March 2016

g8trkim said:

I'm worried but only because we have 3 and I'm done. H is still on the fence about another. I'm getting Mirena again which I had last time. I got pregnant less than a month after removing it! If you're worried, maybe double up on the contraception (IUD or pill PLUS condoms).

Yeah I've been thinking about it and for extra peace of mind I think we'll use condoms in addition to the pill for a while, at least until I start to feel comfortable with my pill again!

kinnonam · March 2016

Me and hubby has had sex since baby was born I'm 6 weeks po. We used condoms both times. I was initially planning on getting the paragard since its hormone free. But, that has been known to give you more intense and longer periods. After talking with my doctor I've decided on nexplanon it does have hormones progesterone *so I can continue to breastfeed.* It is for 3 years and is inserted into the arm vs the cervix like many IUD's. We are def. a one and done family.

meg+on+the+DL · March 2016

So I had the Mirena put in yesterday. They said it was going to hurt a bit. Honestly, I barely felt it. But after the trauma of birthing a child, my uterus probably thought that was a walk in the park!

Question though... my bleeding had stopped and has started again. I figured that would happen because they were reaggrivating my cervix. How long did it last for those of you who got it? Also, how long did the cramping last? Mine feel like really bad period cramps. I have a house full of guests coming for Easter and need to clean my house but I hurt too much to get my butt off the couch!

SarahChristine12 · March 2016

I didn't get Mirena this time as I had a tubal done after delivery, but I had one between DS #2 and DS #3 and again between #3 and #4. I believe both bleeding and cramping only lasted a couple days from what I remember, and the bleeding was really light.

dtaded13 · March 2016

I got the mirena after my first and only had it in 3 months. I bled the entire 3 months which is partially why I opted to have it out.

SarahChristine12 · March 2016

Everyone's experience with it will be different. I spotted for the first couple months on Mirena, but after that I didn't have a single period until it was removed.

BabySeaTurtles · March 2016

I got the Mirena after DS and only had cramps and bleeding for a couple days and never had another period until it was taken out.

meg+on+the+DL · March 2016

Thanks ladies for the input. I haven't had a period since May and I'm going to say that's one of the best parts of pregnancy! The cramps yesterday were not awesome! They have let up today and seem more managed with ibuprofen. Hopefully there's no more bleeding.

themommabee · April 2016

I definitely do not want to get pregnant again and I really screwed up last night. I finally got to sleep in bed with hubby again (been sleeping on couch because LO would not go in his crib) and one thing led to another... I am 6 weeks PP, 4 weeks since I stopped pumping, no period yet and waiting for my IUD to come in. Doc said to wait for sex until IUD was in just to be certain but things got out of hand in the moment. He pulled out (sorry, this is TMI) but I am terrified that I will get pregnant anyway. I am contemplating taking Plan B but can't decide if I'm just being paranoid. I have no idea what to do. Anyway, I don't really know why I am posting except that I just needed to get it off my chest.

mwmiller4 · April 2016

@themommabee if you're really worried/anxious about it, I'd take the Plan B for peace of mind (I'm super paranoid, though). It sounds like you're not breastfeeding, but if you are it looks safe to use while breastfeeding anyway according to Mommy Meds.

blueberrymomma · April 2016

I'm on the fence about having a 3rd baby. DH and I have always agreed on having 3 but now I'm not sure for multiple reasons.
1) I'm pretty miserable pregnant
2) this last delivery was pretty tramatic. With the blood loss, then hand scraping my uterus, and then a blood transfusion. I'm afraid of it happening again
3) both my kids were long inductions and that's no fun
4) the logistics of having 3. I'm pretty paranoid so having 3 kids and only 2 hands stresses me out
i just don't want to regret not having another later in life

mrscammack · April 2016

baya5 said:

I'm on the fence about having a 3rd baby. DH and I have always agreed on having 3 but now I'm not sure for multiple reasons.
1) I'm pretty miserable pregnant
2) this last delivery was pretty tramatic. With the blood loss, then hand scraping my uterus, and then a blood transfusion. I'm afraid of it happening again
3) both my kids were long inductions and that's no fun
4) the logistics of having 3. I'm pretty paranoid so having 3 kids and only 2 hands stresses me out
i just don't want to regret not having another later in life

That's often how I feel about deciding to be one and done. For the most part I know that's what makes sense for us and I don't really think I can handle doing this all over again (miserable pregnancy, long induction, baby blues and that few weeks of hell & sleep deprivation), especially doing it all over again with another kid in tow! But then i wonder if I'll regret not having another one once the window closes so I can't 100% commit to saying I don't want anymore (but I am 100% sure I don't want another one anytime soon!)

middy411 · April 2016

This is not really helpful advice but I just had a nightmare that I was going into labor (another c section) while DD is still 5 weeks old. Not only does the thought of having to have another c section scare me... But I just can't think of resetting the newborn counter to 0 again!

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