Burp or no burp? — The Bump
December 2015 Moms

Burp or no burp?

So my DH gives DD her last bottle of the night, and first bottle in the morning while I pump. Lately he hasn't been burping her half way through the bottle. He says he has, but admitted that he stopped Bc he didn't like to hear her crying while she's being burped. I told him that he needed to do it, so she won't have tummy issues. Anyway, I don't think he's burping her again bc I don't hear her crying half way and she finishes the bottle super quick. After I bring this up to DH, he says that I'm nagging him and wanting him to do everything my way!! I'm so frustrated. I just want him to burp her halfway!!! 

So so my question is this, is the burp halfway through the bottle really necessary? I feel like if she doesn't get that air out, she spits up all day long. So frustrated. End rant!

Re: Burp or no burp?

  • I wouldn't push it. If it's really necessary he'll figure it out. 
    Also not being burped in the middle of two bottles probably isn't going to cause her to spit up all day if she's getting burped after them. 
    spottedgingerabteambBrookeBrown2015Mizuiro007
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  • We stopped burping mid-feeding since he is old enough to let us know when he needs it. He pulls away, moves his head side to side and fusses. I'm sure if your baby was uncomfortable she would let him know. Otherwise, burping after the bottle is probably completely fine :) 
    abteambBrookeBrown2015elbou
  • I asked both DH and our daycare to pace feed and burp DD during a bottle since otherwise she's EBF. Well both of them have independently told me that she goes nuts when I bottle is removed before she's done and makes it difficult to continue the feed, so since DD won't allow true pace feeding or burping it doesn't happen. She seems just fine.
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    abteamb
  • I'd honestly let him do his thing. NBD in the grand scheme of things. 
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    abteambBrookeBrown2015spottedginger
  • I tell my husband how things should be done and I notice him do things his own way. I never nag him about it unless it's a safety issue because he is a parent to and I don't want to micro manage his parenting style. I make decisions on my own when I care for our baby and I would be irritated if my husband made comments on my every move. So I just give a few tips and let it be. I am very OCD about things so yes it is hard to just let things go.. But it's not fair that I make all the decisions when it comes to baby so I just keep some of my thoughts to myself. 
    abteamb
  • Yea let him do it his way. My DH experienced an inconsolable baby because of gas when LO was still very young. Now that LO is 13 weeks, he does pull away... But we both burp every 60 mls or so.
    abteamb
  • I agree with everyone else, don't push it. She's not spitting up all day because he didn't burp her at one bottle. A friend of my bottle fed my DD this week and didn't burp her. I was tempted to say something during but just let it go. If she's crying during burping its almost as bad as not burping.
    abteamb
  • Thanks eveyone, that's good to know. When it comes to everything else I let him do things his way. However, I was noticing DD spitting up more so I thought it was bc he stopped burping her. That's why I kept reminding him. I'm going to try not to burp her halfway and see if she's fine without it. She might not need to be burped anymore...
    elbou
  • yl1m32015 said:
    I hardly burp her anymore. She's 4mo. If she gets fussy I sit her up and she burps herself. 
    This. For my baby at least, burping has been a bonus, not a necessity. He burps himself if he needs it.
    abteambyl1m32015
  • @momotheflyinglemur I agree.. Daddy's will figure out on their own what works and what doesn't we have to allow them trial and error.. I mean just months ago none of us had a clue what we were doing.. Now that daddy's are with the babes while we are headed back to work and such its their turn for trial and error and to learn what works. 
    abteambelbouATolentino89
  • I had the same exact issue. I micromanage everything H does, but I've gotten better. In the beginning it was so hard because I read so many things on the internet how to do it the "right" way so I wanted him to do it too. The more he didn't listen to me the more angry I got with him and it just didn't help the situation. It's like stressing myself out. 

    But it when I let up and said "screw it" and let him do his thing. he did well. 

    Dont stress yourself out about it, like all other PPs, let him figure it out, and it doesn't really matter who is doing it "better," you'll both figure out the baby's quirks and needs on your own. 
    laurabwalkerGingermom15
  • elbouelbou
    Sixth Anniversary 250 Answers 500 Love Its 1000 Comments
    member
    @momotheflyinglemur I agree.. Daddy's will figure out on their own what works and what doesn't we have to allow them trial and error.. I mean just months ago none of us had a clue what we were doing.. Now that daddy's are with the babes while we are headed back to work and such its their turn for trial and error and to learn what works. 

    And guess what.....allowing your hubby to try things their own way is great practice for when your sweet little baby is a big opinionated toddler (or grade-schooler, or high-schooler, etc.) and wants to do things their way too ;)


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    abteamb
  • We don't burp my 3m old ever anymore. When you take the bottle out of her mouth she loses it, so we just gave up. She burps at the end occasionally. When I breastfeed, she flies off the boob & shrieks if she needs to burp. I hold her upright & she lets it out immediately. Turns out she just doesn't need to be burped anymore. She spits up some days, but I believe it's unrelated to burping. I think it has more to do with how much she eats. I have a fast letdown & sometimes she just gets too much too fast. If your LO really needed to be burped halfway through would she let you know? 
    abteambGingermom15
  • Yeah I don't wind my lo anymore, he does it himself. I would say winding in the middle of a feed isn't necessary after the newborn phase

    abteamb
  • I grapple with being a helicopter mom when my husband takes over. I have a specific way of doing things and am a total control freak about the kids, but this was a major source of contention for us when our first was a baby. I had to be more thoughtful about how I approached my advice to him. This is a big complaint among his friends as well.

    I'm all about not burping at this point. It probably isn't necessary but you know your baby better than anyone.
    abteamb
  • We never got the hang of burping Olive. If we lift her upright, she tends to burp on her own and I've heard her as I drift off to sleep belching the night away. 

    Babies ARE able to burp on their own sometimes. It's just.. other times they need help. They'll cry if they do. If Olive doesn't cry, she doesn't have trapped gas. 

    I might be totally wrong but my mother said to just chill out and wait for her to let me know if she needs some help bringing it up.
    abteamb
  • groovylocksgroovylocks
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    member
    edited March 2016
    And btw, fyi, I have to deal with being really controlling about Olive too. Moreso because I am no longer in love with her father so I feel like I have to be careful of being extra critical. I think on the whole, he is a good dad. But he's not a mum. He's a dad and does things in a typical dad fashion. 

    Like bath time. He doesn't use her little bath. He puts water in the big tub and, holding her head above the water line, lets her float and kick and splash. And i panicked about it and, give the devil his due, she LOVES it and won't have a bath without "swim time" - in fact, this 3 month old baby is starting to kick and try to swim on her own. As a swimmer myself, I'm delighted to see her take to the water with such love. It's the first hobby I've seen her take any active interest in. 

    Her dad gave her that. Despite my nagging at him to "omg don't drown my child!"

    So.. you know.. let him do things his way. Keep a quiet eye on things if you must. You'll know when to step in, I promise. 
    andreaAL11
  • @groovylocks this is the EXACT thing my husband did also lol I panicked and he was like "cal down she's fine" while she kicks her little legs away. Yay for early swim lessons! 
    abteamb
  • DD is almost 12 weeks and I toy with not burping her anymore. I do still burp between breasts or if she starts pulling off the breast a lot but it almost seems like me burping her when she doesn't seem to need it causes her to spit up! If I don't burp her (if she falls asleep or we feed in the car seat) she practically never spits up. So it has me wondering...
  • dmendo01 said:
    DD is almost 12 weeks and I toy with not burping her anymore. I do still burp between breasts or if she starts pulling off the breast a lot but it almost seems like me burping her when she doesn't seem to need it causes her to spit up! If I don't burp her (if she falls asleep or we feed in the car seat) she practically never spits up. So it has me wondering...
    I was thinking this same thing. I never burp her before bed or in the middle of the night, and she never spits up then... But always does after other feedings... Hmm.
    dmendo01
  • I stopped burping entirely after reading some of the comments on this post. I will burp if she is upset but most often if I sit her up when she starts to fuss during or after a feed she burps on her own with far less spit up b
  • Since reading this post I'm torn if I should burp or not anymore. DD spits up so I dunno if me not burping will help. Maybe I'll give it a try. She also gets gas easily so I think it may be worst if I stop burping I dunno we'll see.
  • We never really burped LO. When she was really young I semi did but she has always let me know if she needed help. Usually just holding her upright and kind of bouncing usually gets one out. She has never really spit up either. 
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Ok, so this weekend I tested it out. We didn't burp at all halfway. After she finished her entire bottle, we kind of propped her up and she would burp on her own without us even patting or rubbing her back. So far, she's been fine. Actually a little less spit up than usual. Hmm....I guess this means no more halfway burping for us. Problem solved for now lol

    elbou
  • We burp DS. He'll be 3 mos on the 22nd. If we don't burp him, he spits up a lot, so the two can be related. I wait until after he finishes, though. He typically eats 4 oz bottles, and only sometimes wants more, so I burp flyer the 4 oz. I'm not sure when DH does. He may still do it in the middle. 

    Jamie


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