Tools for getting through it all

dragonfaerie · March 2016

Good afternoon everyone! I thought I would start a discussion to list things that I have done to help with my anxiety and impatience through this process in hopes that it would help others. Not everything works for every person, and some may seem quite strange, but experimenting with non-medication has helped me expand my repertoire and add to my "toolbox". Please feel free to post your tools as well.

Infertility affirmations - see previous thread of mine or search on Google
Coloring - look for braids, knots, and coils for anxiety
Mandalas - look for Ravensdaughter designs on Facebook, or search for Mandala coloring pages online
Yoga and yoga breathing
Thankful thoughts - everyday think of at least one thing you are thankful for and meditate on it for a few minutes
Therapy - just having someone other than your spouse or BFF to vent to can be wonderful!
Nature walks
5 senses countdown - from where you are sitting take note of 5 things you can see, 4 you can touch, 3 you can hear, 2 you can smell, and 1 you can taste. This is especially useful when having an anxiety attack
Small space - I have a corner in my closet that I can tuck myself into and hide for a few minutes. The containment is soothing (at least for me) as well as it being dark and private so I don't get overstimulated. You could also get wrapped up in blankets/pillows. Don't underestimate the power of reverting to childhood for a little while!

I hope some of these help. It's hard to keep it together when you are in the middle of a TWW, waiting for AF to start, worrying about money, feeling in pain, or just tired of getting stuck with a needle. Take care of yourselves! Blessings!

ultratomato · March 2016

I also do the coloring book. Paint parties. Bake. Shop. And I want to start pottery classes. The TWW stinks.

Tulips29 · March 2016

Great tools! I also love the adult coloring books, doing one right now

Some others I'll add that I enjoy and that help me - journal, take a long bath, read, binge on my favorite shows

wifeinraleigh28 · March 2016

I love your list! Those adult coloring books are awesome. I have so many of them!

My absolutely favorite coping skill though is knitting and/or crocheting. I'm making all kinds of things for our home (currently working on a table runner for our formal dining room and a throw for our living room). It brings me so much joy and relaxation.

I also enjoy sitting outside in the backyard and reading now that the weather is warming up. And after I get those BFNs, I enjoy a glass of chilled white wine while I do this!

LizzieJ13 · March 2016

I love this! I really enjoy taking long walks with a good podcast. I actually just ordered an adult coloring book, too. My husband and I were talking about this last night as we are starting to feel the stress of this process more and more. (Looks like another BFN this cycle.) I definitely need more outlets -- thinking about finally starting to get back into jogging.

dragonfaerie · March 2016

Thanks all! I'm definitely going to start jogging now that the weather is getting nicer and it's not dark out at 5 o clock.

msirni0 · March 2016

For me it's yoga! I've been practicing yoga for several years now, and it definitely has helped me have a more positive outlook and distract me (and keep the crazy symptom spotting thoughts at bay). I miss the more advanced poses during the TWW when I modify my practice a bit, but I know it will be worth it. Now that the weather is getting nicer I plan on spending more time outside!

edited bc words

omarismyhomeboy · March 2016

This is so wonderfully helpful. I'll only add that for me, some yoda nidra and short guided meditations help.

sarahloveshubby · March 2016

I LOVE going on long walks with DH, it relieves stress for both of us.
This is all so emotionally draining, I still find myself having a hard time getting up in the morning and getting on with my day. But we just have to take it one day at a time.

wifeinraleigh28 · March 2016

I'm with you on the long walks with DH, @sarahloveshubby! My DH and I do a 3 mile walk around our neighborhood every morning, which includes a stop at our neighborhood coffee house. Not sure what I would do without this wonderful daily ritual of ours.

mwendell24 · March 2016

I started doing mindful meditation with the Headspace app... The first ten days you kind of learn how to do it, and then from there they have general sessions, sessions for meltdown moments, sessions specifically designed for fertility/pregnancy, etc.

im going to have to check some of your ideas out! The adult coloring book especially is calling my name...

PurplePumpernickel · March 2016

I've been practicing yoga for quite some time, and that practice has really helped me, especially over the past year, figuring out what wasn't going right. Today I did my first yoga workshop, targeting arm balances. The instructor gave us each a little charm that said, "believe" and we got to keep them. I'm more spiritual than religious but I really took this to heart, because the message was all about believing in yourself, believing in what your body can do.

Im not one to think that this IF is happening for a reason, but just being able to acknowledge my own strength and what my body can do has been really comforting.

Griffin5413 · March 2016

These are all such good ideas. I have been blogging throughout the process to keep our family and close friends updated but also to let them know how they can specifically be praying for us. I love crafting so I've been sewing a lot. We live in AZ and this time of year is the best to be outside so we hike whenever we can. Of course in a month, we won't be feeling that way about the heat.

dragonfaerie · March 2016

@Griffin5413 That's great! What do you sew?

Griffin5413 · March 2016

@dragonfaerie - I've been working on a few quilt tops. Right now I'm making a flag quilt. I've also made several receiving blankets & matching burp cloths. I know so many people who are pregnant and they make such cute gifts.

dragonfaerie · March 2016

@Griffin5413 That's cool! I want to try my hand at making baby clothes, but I usually do crafty things. I want to make myself a table runner for Spring, I already made a Fall/Winter one. I also make microwavable rice bags with herbs in them, and cord organizers for travel. I've also done a couple of square lap quilts for people.

At least most sewing projects take forever to do so they use up that waiting!

Griffin5413 · March 2016

@dragonfaerie - that's the truth! It's so nice to have something to occupy my time. I can just sit at the sewing machine all afternoon if I had the time. I downloaded some cute patterns for changing pads and a few little things like that. I saw the cutest little onsie that says "I survived the Ice Age" that I think I might need to get at some point. Maybe I'lll make one... So appropriate for all of our little frozen embabies!

em01092 · March 2016

These are all great ideas. Something that helps me is visualizing myself on an escalator and imagining myself literally coming down from the anxiety, the situation, whatever may be stressing me. It sounds kind of silly, but for me it helps! I also watch ASMR videos on YouTube (ASMR stands for autonomous sensory meridian response)- basically they are people doing things that some find relaxing, such as reading in a soft voice or folding towels. Some people just get super relaxed, other people also feel "tingles". Yep that probably sounds even more strange lol. Some of the news reports I have seen on ASMR sexualize it, but it's not really meant to be taken that way. I don't personally suffer from insomnia, but I know a lot of folks say ASMR helps with that.

dragonfaerie · March 2016

@Griffin5413 That onesie sounds adorable! You should post a picture if you end up making it!

cmm012 · March 2016

I might take up sewing again. It helped when I was writing my dissertation. I like creative outlets where I can focus on something very tangible and see a product. It makes me keep I'm making some kind of progress in my life.

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